'TBH Politoons'
Thanks, again, Tim!
Weekly Review
HARPER'S WEEKLY REVIEW
August 5, 2003
Resident George W. Bush refused to declassify the
twenty-eight pages of Congress's September 11 report that
pertained to Saudi Arabia, despite calls to do so by members
of Congress and by the Saudi government itself, which said
it intended to rebut the contents.
The Defense Advanced Research Projects Agency (DARPA)
quickly scuttled an idea to create a futures-trading market
for terrorist attacks, after the plan was revealed by
opponents in Congress. DARPA head John M. Poindexter
announced his resignation, telling a friend that he planned
to spend more time sailing.
Resident Bush announced his opposition to same-sex unions.
The Vatican issued an edict calling such unions "evil" and
describing adoption of children by gay couples as "doing
violence."
The number of AIDS cases in the U.S. was shown to
be rising for the first time in ten years.
Resident Bush blamed the weakness of the economy on "the
drumbeat to war," which he attributed in turn to the news
media. "Remember on our TV screens -- I'm not suggesting
which network did this -- but it said, 'March to War,' every
day from last summer until the spring," Bush said. "'March
to War, March to War.' That's not a very conducive
environment for people to take risk, when they hear 'March
to War' all the time."
Continued at www.harpers.org/weekly-review
--Bill Wasik
Reader Suggestion
Re: Army Of One
The first time I saw this animation a couple of days ago, I thought it
would
make a killer TV ad. Something that if only the Democratic Party, or one
of
the many Democratic candidates, ran would have a major effect on Dubya's
popularity ratings. It's not the only animation I've seen which ought to
be run as a TV ad, but it's up amongst the top 5.
Now I see, on viewing it again, that many people have since suggested that
it ought to be run as a TV ad and takebackthemedia are asking for donations
to let them run it, If you have the money to spare and a means of payment
acceptable to PayPal then you should seriously consider making a donation.
Selected Readings
from that Mad Cat, JD
Reader Comment
Re: Bob Hope in Hell
I thought Bob Hope was in hell because all the jokes he made since Vietnam were lonesome.
Ray
from Alvin
'SEE YOU IN SEPTEMBER'
MIDI
SEE YOU IN SEPTEMBER
(Sung to 'See You In September')
(As Sung By pResident Bush)
(I'll have a ball each and every night)
(I'll be away for much needed naps)
Bye-bye, so long, farewell
Bye-bye, so long!
See you in September
Guess I'll see you on Labor Day
Here I am (bye, Cheney, goodbye)
Waving goodbye to the White House (Oval Office, goodbye)
Month-long vacation (bye, Rummy, bye)
Oh, cannot be delayed! (bye Ashy, goodbye)
Have a good time, enjoy the weather
Fit for duty, run away from Washington
I will see you in September
The pResident will be in Texas for a while!
(Counting the days I'll be away from you)
(Counting the hours and the minutes, too!)
(Bye, Cheney, goodbye)
(Oval Office, goodbye)
Bye, Rummy, goodbye (bye-bye, so long, Powell)
Bye, Ashy, goodbye (bye-bye, so long)
Have a good time, a happy camper
Fit for duty, run away from Washington
I will see you in September
The pResident will be in Texas for a while!
(I'll have a ball each and every night)
(I'll be away for much needed naps)
See you (bye-bye, so long, farewell)
In September (annual retreat to my Texas spread)
I will see you (meet old friends at fundraisers)
In September (clearing brush will play as well)
Guess I'll see you (bye-bye, so long, farewell)
In September (bye-bye, so long, be well)
The pResident (bye-bye, so long, bye!)
Will be in Texas for a while! (goodbye, bye!)
alvin (-.-)
In The Chaos Household
Last Night
While the weather is about perfect, the smog makes the clouds appear slightly off-white, with light orange-brown highlights.
Talked to dear old Dad in PA - he was kind of bummed. He said it's rained so much this summer his garden is waterlogged. The tomatoes are pathetic & rotting on the vine & he only got 4 cucumbers - and they
were sad little puny things.
The city tore up some more sidewalk nice & early. During the afternoon they poured concrete, but in less than half of what had been torn asunder. Still no rhyme or reason to their schedule.
Tonight, Wednesday, CBS opens the evening with '60 Minutes II', followed by a FRESH 'Big Brother 4', then
'48 Hours'.
Scheduled on a FRESH Dave are Samuel L. Jackson, Rick Reilly, Pharrell, and Clipse.
Scheduled on a FRESH Craiggers are Candace Bushnell, Nick Swardson, and Anthony Michael Hall.
NBC starts the night with a FRESH 'Race To The Altar', followed by a RERUN 'West Wing', then a
RERUN 'Law & Order'.
Scheduled on a FRESH Jay are Dat Phan, the winner of "Last Comic Standing", Arnold Schwarzenegger, Tara Reid, and Jewel.
Scheduled on a FRESH Conan are Colin Farrell, Molly Shannon, and Smash Mouth.
Scheduled on a FRESH Carson Daly are Eddie Kaye Thomas, Paul Teutul, Jr. & Paul Teutul, Sr., and Junior Senior.
ABC begins the evening with a RERUN 'My Wife & Kids', followed by a RERUN 'George Lopez', then the
Series Premiere of 'The Real Roseanne Show', then a FRESH 'The Family'.
Scheduled on a FRESH Jimmy Kimmel is this week's guest co-host Macy Gray
The WB offers a RERUN 'Smallville', followed by a FRESH 'Pepsi Smash'.
Faux airs the pre-taped last Saturday '2003 Teen Choice Awards'.
UPN has a RERUN 'Enterprise', followed by a RERUN 'Twilight Zone'.
A&E has 'Biography' (Jonathan Winters), 'American Justice', and 'Take This Job...'.
AMC offers the movie 'The Rare Breed', followed by the movie 'High Plains Drifter', then the movie 'Von Ryan's Express'.
BBC -
[7pm] 'Ground Force' - Pitsea;
[7:30pm] 'Changing Rooms' - Liverpool;
[8pm] 'Homefront in the Garden' - Harbourne;
[8:30pm] 'Homefront in the Garden' - Chingford;
[9pm] 'My Hero' - Episode 4;
[9:40pm] 'Keeping Up Appearances' - Episode 7;
[10:20pm] 'Keeping Up Appearances' - Episode 8;
[11pm] 'So Graham Norton' - Phil Collins;
[11:30pm] 'So Graham Norton' - Blondie;
[12am] 'My Hero' - Episode 4;
[12:40am] 'Keeping Up Appearances' - Episode 7;
[1:20am] 'Keeping Up Appearances' - Episode 8;
[2am] 'Homefront in the Garden' - Harbourne;
[2:30am] 'Homefront in the Garden' - Chingford;
[3am] 'So Graham Norton' - Phil Collins; and
[3:30am] 'So Graham Norton' - Blondie. (ALL TIMES EDT)
Bravo has the movie 'The Untouchables', followed by the movie 'The Untouchables'.
Scheduled on a FRESH Jon Stewart is Robert Duvall.
History has 'Modern Marvels', 'Big Rigs Of Combat', and more 'Modern Marvels'.
SciFi has 'Tracker', the movie 'Village Of Teh Damned', then the movie 'Warlock'.
Showtime has the Season Premiere of 'Street Time'.
TCM celebrates 24-hours of Robert Mitchum with a great schedule -
[6am] 'The Angry Hills' (1959);
[8am] 'Desire Me' (1947);
[10am] 'The Lusty Men' (1952);
[12pm] 'The Wonderful Country' (1959);
[2pm] 'Crossfire' (1947);
[3:30pm] 'Where Danger Lives' (1950);
[5pm] 'Two For The Seesaw' (1962);
[7:15pm] 'Private Screenings: Mitchum/Russell' (1996);
[8pm] 'Macao' (1952);
[9:30pm] 'The Night Of The Hunter' (1955);
[11:15pm] 'Thunder Road' (1958);
[1am] 'The Story of G.I. Joe' (1945);
[3am] 'Blood On The Moon' (1949); and
[4:30am] 'Young Billy Young' (1969). (ALL TIMES EDT)
USA has a FRESH 'Peacemakers'.
Anyone have any opinions?
Or reviews?
(See below for addresses)
Folk trio and activists Peter, Paul & Mary perform, Tuesday, August, 5, 2003, on the steps of the Lincoln Memorial to mark the upcoming 40th anniversary of Dr. Martin Luther King's 'I have a dream' speech, during the March on Washington on August 28, 1963, at the memorial. From left to right are Paul Stookey, Mary Travers and Peter Yarrow. They performed at the 1963 civil rights event.
Photo by Ron Edmonds
The Information One-Stop
Moose & Squirrel
Muslim Comedienne - Veiled Humor
Shazia Mirza
British Muslim comedienne Shazia Mirza strides on stage dressed all in black and says: "Don't worry, I won't blow you up."
The predominantly white audience titters nervously but she soon has them onside with another caustic one-liner: "My name is Shazia Mirza. At least that is what it says on my pilot's license."
Then it is onto the Saudi Arabian women caught stealing on security cameras. "Police are looking for a woman with brown eyes," she said, delivering her deadpan humor with a face as somber as her traditional dress. The crowd at the Edinburgh Fringe Festival lap it up.
From New York to the Netherlands she loves to mock Western ignorance of Islam, using her literally veiled humor to push out the boundaries of taste.
"I just tell the truth. If it makes people uncomfortable, it's they who have a problem," she told Reuters.
"If you can do Germany, you can do anywhere. They are not famous for their sense of humor but they loved it," she said.
And she went down a storm when she told Germans during the Iraq conflict "Come on, join in. It's not the same without you."
For more, Shazia Mirza
Thanks, Alex!
'The Pop of King'
Stephen King
When he was in college at the University of Maine in the 1960s, best-selling author Stephen King had a column, "King's Garbage Truck," that ran in the student newspaper.
Now the Bangor novelist has a column again, this time in Entertainment Weekly magazine. It marks the first time King has written a regularly scheduled column since his university days.
His monthly piece, called "The Pop of King," debuts in the Aug. 8 issue. In it, he gives his opinions on books, movies, television, music and more.
In the introduction to his first column, the 55-year-old explains that he wrote a review of "Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix" for the magazine a few months ago. The editors came back to him, he says, because they either liked the review or the fact that it was written in longhand.
"For all I know, they might have thought it would be good to have at least one writer on tap who could turn in copy even after a nuclear pulse wiped out the hard drives on all the laptops," King writes.
Stephen King
Heading Texas School Music Campaign
Willie Nelson
Willie Nelson, Ray Benson and Michelle Shocked are among the artists behind "Don't Mess With Texas Music," a public awareness campaign to help music programs survive in schools amid budget cuts.
Nelson is honorary chairman of the Texas Music Project. Benson, leader of the band Asleep at the Wheel, and Shocked, a Grammy-nominated singer-songwriter, are on the advisory board.
The Texas Music Project rose out of concern that many school districts facing budget crunches are starting to cut back on music programs, said executive director Bruce Orr.
Willie Nelson
Nearly 200 people take part in the first 'flash mob' event in the Boston area, Thursday, July 31, 2003, at the Harvard University COOP store in Cambridge, Mass. To some, it's art or even a social revolution. But for many it's just irreverent, silly fun. It's called a ``flash mob,'' crowds of people converging in prearranged locations to perform wacky, harmless stunts for a few minutes in public. The mob participants swamped the greeting cards section of the store acting like they were looking for a card for a friend.
Photo by Adam Hunger
Force of Evil for 'Smallville'
Rutger Hauer
Teen Superman's powers will be put to the test by a serious dark force.
Rutger Hauer, known for the gallery of formidable villains he has played on the big screen, has been tapped to do a two-episode arc on the WB Network's drama "Smallville." He will play an underworld kingpin.
Hauer, who has turned in memorable performances in such movies as "Blade Runner" and "The Hitcher," was most recently seen in George Clooney's "Confessions of a Dangerous Mind." He also did a guest appearance on the ABC spy drama "Alias" this past season. He recently wrapped "Dracula Legacy" for Dimension Films, in which he plays the title role, and TNT's adaptation of Stephen King's novel "Salem's Lot." He won a Golden Globe for his role in the 1987 CBS TV movie "Escape From Sobibor."
Rutger Hauer
Pays $50,000 to Learn Who's 'So Vain'
Dick Ebersol
Carly Simon finally will reveal who the mysterious subject of her 1972 mega-hit "You're so Vain" is to raise money for a Martha's Vineyard charity, but to only one person for a winning bid of $50,000,
Actor Warren Beatty has long led the speculation over who was the subject of the song that hit No. 1 in December 1972, though Stones lead singer Mick Jagger and her husband at the time, James Taylor, have been mentioned as contenders.
On the NBC "Today Show" on Tuesday, NBC Sports President Dick Ebersol said he had won the bidding at Monday's Possible Dreams Auction to benefit the Community Services of Martha's Vineyard, where Simon makes her home.
Ebersol said Simon told him he could offer a clue as to the identity of the mystery man. "The letter 'E' is in the person's name."
Dick Ebersol
SoCal Festival Honors Singer
Etta James
Blues singer Etta James won't have to travel far from home to pick up her latest award.
The 65-year-old vocalist, nicknamed Matriarch of the Blues, will be honored with a lifetime achievement award at the upcoming Temecula Valley International Film & Music Festival.
James will accept the award in September in Temecula. She has lived in nearby Riverside for the past 10 years.
James this year was awarded her own star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame and lifetime achievement honors from the Grammy organization. She was inducted into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame in 1993.
Etta James
Fans Toss Tributes
Keith Richards
Keith Richards enjoys sampling drugs that fans throw onstage while he's performing with the Rolling Stones. The grizzled guitarist, now on tour to celebrate the band's 40th anniversary, says he often picks up
packets marked "Keith" and is surprised by the quality. "Yeah, some if it's pretty good," he tells Q magazine. "We toss away the c-p, you know? The guys'll pick it up and it gets sent back to my room. Sometimes I won't open it for days now. It's usually weed."
Keith Richards
Museum Marks 75th Birthday
Andy Warhol
If Andy Warhol were alive to celebrate his 75th birthday, his fans say he would embrace the Internet, cell phones and even reality TV.
"He would have loved the Internet for the democratization of art," said Thomas Sokolowski, director of The Andy Warhol Museum in Pittsburgh. "I know he would have gone into every new technology."
To mark Warhol's birthday — as much as his artistic contributions — Sokolowski's museum is offering free cake and admission for 75 cents on Wednesday. Visitors will be able to view six special exhibitions as part of the "Summer of Andy" event at one of the most comprehensive single-artist museums in the world.
On Saturday and Sunday, visitors will receive $1 off the regular $8 adult admission if they bring a canned good for a food drive.
Warhol died in 1987 at the age of 58 following complications from gall bladder surgery. Today, he continues to transcend hipness and youth, though he always felt like an ugly duckling.
"His family called him Andy, the red-nosed Warhola," Sokolowski said.
For more, Andy Warhol
The Andy Warhol Museum
Museum of Modern Art
In The Kitchen With BartCop & Friends
To Honor Diverse Artists
Kennedy Center
James Brown, Carol Burnett, Loretta Lynn, Mike Nichols and Itzhak Perlman have been chosen for the 26th annual Kennedy Center Honors.
James A. Johnson, chairman of the John F. Kennedy Center for the Performing Arts, said Tuesday that all five are being honored "for the unique and extremely valuable contributions they have made to the cultural life of our nation."
Resident Bush and first lady Laura 'Pickles' Bush will hold a White House reception for the honorees on Dec. 7, followed by a gala performance at the Kennedy Center Opera House. Stars from around the world take part in the performance, but the five winners traditionally remain in the audience.
CBS will present the show as a two-hour prime-time special later in December.
Kennedy Center
Where's Paul McCartney? He was scheduled for last year, but bailed - he said for a niece's wedding, and would attend this year. Paul Simon was honored in McCartney's place.
OTOH, wonder why they keep holding these festitivies on the anniversary of Pearl Harbor?
Japanese people pray for atomic bomb victims at Peace Memorial Park in Hiroshima, August 6, 2003. The city of Hiroshima marked the 58th anniversary of the world's first atomic bomb attack on Wednesday.
Photo by Toshiyuki Aizawa
Testified In Court
Heidi Fleiss
Former "Hollywood Madam" Heidi Fleiss sobbed on the witness stand on Tuesday as she testified that actor Tom Sizemore stubbed a cigarette out on her, smacked her in the face and verbally abused her during a rocky year-long relationship.
But lawyers for Sizemore, best known for playing a gruff sergeant in "Saving Private Ryan," told a Los Angeles jury that Fleiss was a "liar" who had invented the allegations. Prosecutors said they had photographs of her injuries and tapes of his threats.
Under questioning from Deputy City Attorney Robert Cha, she said the actor lost his temper that November when they appeared on the Howard Stern radio show to promote the film "Black Hawk Down."
The following May, Fleiss said, the couple fought after she learned that he was consorting with prostitutes and led a "whole other life" while filming the horror movie "Dreamcatcher" in Canada.
Fleiss said that when she confronted Sizemore over a National Enquirer article headlined "Hollywood Madam's Boyfriend Cheating on Her With Hookers," he became violent.
"He hit me," she said. "I had a black eye and a fat lip the next day. He dragged me across the room by my hair."
Heidi Fleiss
Lynyrd Skynyrd Tour Off
Gary Rossington
Gary Rossington, the leader and guitarist with ill-starred southern rock band Lynyrd Skynyrd has suffered a mild seizure several months after undergoing open heart surgery, forcing the group to cancel a tour, spokesmen said on Tuesday.
Rossington, 51, was released from an Atlanta hospital on Monday after seeking treatment for fatigue, and ordered by doctors to rest at home for several weeks. The band will return to the road on Aug. 23 when it begins its "Vicious Cycle" tour in Omaha, Nebraska.
His illness has forced Lynyrd Skynyrd to pull out of its co-headlining tour with former Van Halen singer Sammy Hagar, who will continue the trek by himself.
Rossington, along with pianist Billy Powell, is one of only two original members in the veteran band. Singer Ronnie Van Zant and guitarist Steve Gaines were killed when the group's plane crashed in a Mississippi swamp in 1977; most recently, bass player Leon Wilkeson died in 2001, aged 49.
Gary Rossington
Formerly 'The Vidiot'
Purported Film a Hoax
Van Gogh
A team of Dutch filmmakers who said they had made a documentary about a snippet of film showing Vincent van Gogh admitted Monday that the claim was a hoax, the Dutch national news service said.
The filmmakers had claimed a grainy passer-by in the film was the brilliant but troubled painter. Van Gogh committed suicide in 1890, when photography was still young and celluloid film had scarcely been invented.
Lumineus Film Productions producer Jeroen Neus, had said van Gogh was attending a welcoming party for a new pastor in Zundert when he was coincidentally captured on film for a few seconds by an early film enthusiast.
The "Van Gogh film" will be shown anyway. It will be screened in the artist's native village of Zundert next Saturday as part of celebrations marking the 150th year of his birth.
Van Gogh
www.lumineus.nl/nasa
A tourist looks through a glass tunnel at large Grey Nurse sharks in the Sydney Aquarium, August 5, 2003. The open ocean aquarium is Sydney's most popular paid tourist venue, with over 1.15 million visitors last year.
Photo by David Gray
Formal Separation
Raquel Welch
Film star Raquel Welch and her fourth husband, restaurateur Richard Palmer, have agreed to separate, a spokeswoman said on Tuesday.
"Raquel Welch and her husband Richie Palmer have agreed to separate after four years of marriage," spokeswoman Jill Bushinsky said in a statement.
"Neither has any further comment at this time except to say that there is no third party involved and the separation is amicable," Bushinsky said.
Raquel Welch
How Bad?
Gigli
Gigli is a movie that everybody knows about but no one has seen, which speaks volumes about the power of celebrity at the box office. Starring Jennifer Lopez (ranked fifth on the Forbes Celebrity 100) and Ben Affleck (number seven), the movie took in just $3.8 million in its opening weekend at the box office. If, as seems likely, it winds up grossing about $10 million, it would be the most resounding box-office failure in recent years. Gigli is such a massive failure that it could make Hollywood rethink its fascination with stars--for a minute or two, at least.
Just how poorly did Gigli fare? $3.8 million represents at $6 a ticket about 633,000 tickets. Since it opened in 2,215 theaters and perhaps 5,000 screens with 16 showings over three days, some quick division indicates that at the average screening fewer than ten brave souls were in attendance.
Comparing it to other recent star-studded films of the same ilk, Gigli figures to gross substantially less than Life, Or Something Like It, starring Edward Burns and Angelina Jolie, which earned $14.4 million in the U.S. for Fox, a division of News Corp.; and less than Rock Star, which earned $17 million for Warner Bros, a unit of AOL Time Warner. Rock Star featured Mark Wahlberg and Jennifer Aniston, who is number one on Forbes Celebrity 100.
Gigli
Running For Office
Celebrities
Sonny Bono did it. So did Cooter from The Dukes of Hazzard. And Gopher from The Love Boat.
If Jerry Springer announces Wednesday that he is indeed running for the U.S. Senate from Ohio, he will be only the latest celebrity to try to jump from TV to D.C.
Celebrity also has helped athletes win seats in Congress. Former basketball star Bill Bradley of New Jersey served 18 years in the U.S. Senate, then ran for president in 2000; he lost the Democratic nomination to Al Gore. Former University of Nebraska football coach Tom Osborne ran for Congress as a Republican in 2000 and received 82% of the vote. Hall of Fame pitcher Jim Bunning is now a Republican senator from Kentucky.
Not all celebrities are successful. Nancy Kulp, who played Miss Hathaway on The Beverly Hillbillies in the 1960s, lost a race for a Pennsylvania congressional seat in 1984. Ralph Waite, "Pa" from The Waltons in the 1970s and early '80s, lost a race for a California seat in 1998 to Mary Bono, whose late husband, Sonny, was one of Congress' best-known celebrities.
For more, Celebrities
Giant Panda Pregnant with Twins
San Diego Zoo
San Diego zoo officials announced on Monday that Bai Yun, a giant panda on loan from China, is expected to deliver twins sometime this month.
Because panda pregnancies can vary in length by as much as three months, zookeepers don't know exactly when the babies will be born -- or who their father is.
In March, Bai Yun mated naturally with her new partner, Gao Gao, zoo officials said. After Gao Gao lost interest in Bai Yun a day later, she was artificially inseminated with semen from her former mate, Shi Shi.
Shi Shi and Bai Yun are the parents of 3-year-old Hua Mei, the only surviving giant panda cub born in the United States.
San Diego Zoo
'Goliath' a white-tail deer buck, stands in the field of Rod and Dianne Miller in Knox, Pa.. Tuesday, Aug. 5, 2003. The giant buck with some 50 to 60 points on its antlers and worth upward of $1 million is believed back with its rightful owners after it was stolen nearly four years ago. But the owners of the deer farm aren't conceding that their deer is that deer.
Photo by Keith Srakocic
'Ark of Darkness'
"The Ark of Darkness", a Political/Science-Fiction work, in tidy, weekly installments (and updated every Friday).
The Group finally comes face-to-face with Satan, himself.
'The Osbournes'
'The Osbournes' ~ Page 5
'The Osbournes' ~ Page 4
'The Osbournes' ~ Page 3
'The Osbournes' ~ Page 2
'The Osbournes' ~ Page 1
