Bartcop Entertainment - Wednesday, 28 January, 2004

Wednesday

28 January, 2004

big hammer - bigger hammer

(Updated Daily)

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Issue #90

Disinfotainment Today

By Michael Dare

 
Issue #90
is brought to you by

Inadvertent Irony
 
Letters I'll Never Send
 
One of the reasons I'm still alive is because I never sent these letters. Whenever I write a letter like this, I stick it in a file and wait a week, then read it again. Usually I'm glad I didn't send it. Sometimes I surgically remove the one sentence that could be mistaken for rational and use it in another letter that I actually send.
 
Some things are best said in person because in print they might be taken incorrectly if read with the wrong delivery. After all, the only difference between "I soar!" and "eyesore" is delivery. You better say "lox" with the right delivery when asking for directions at the supermarket or you'll get sent to the hardware section.
 
More than once have I sent something sarcastically that was replied to in earnest. If your sarcasm comes out of anger, as most does, and the anger in your communication comes across stronger than the sarcasm, you will more than likely end up misconstrued.
 
Examples abound.
 
All my letters end with a quote from somebody, sometimes random, sometimes pointed. My quote file, as you must imagine, is enormous. When I finish writing a letter, I scroll through the file to find an appropriate quote, sometimes funny, sometimes profound, sometimes mysterious and oblique, and I cut and paste it into the signature of the letter.
 
There was once an employer who objected to a quote from George Bernard Shaw. He thought I was calling him an idiot because I used a particular quote. He was offended. I owed him an apology. He didn't DISAGREE. If he had merely disagreed with Shaw's statement, I could have engaged him in a hearty discussion. Interpretations of Shaw 'R' Us. He could have rebutted with another quote saying the opposite of the Shaw quote. Perfectly acceptable retort in a quote volley.
 
But he didn't disagree, he OBJECTED. How could I have quoted such a thing to him? If we were going to work together, how could I call him an idiot? What I wrote and almost sent was "You think George Bernard Shaw was talking about YOU? Hey man, if the shoe fits... If you disagree with George Bernard Shaw, you should take it up with George Bernard Shaw, and you should be glad I didn't quote Adolf Hitler."
 
Instead, rationality and humor reared their ugly heads and I ended up promising never to quote George Bernard Shaw to him again, and that actually solved the problem.
 
What an idiot.
 
So I read these letters a week later and usually say to myself "Boy, I'm glad I didn't send that one," and it immediately gets sent to the "Letters I'm Glad I Didn't Send" file.
 
That file's gotten pretty big...
 
Letter #1
 
Dear sir or madam,
 
Fuck you, you scumbag.
 
What the hell's the matter with you? Haven't you got a brain? Where were you raised, in a bubble, in a cave, in a castle in the clouds? Take a look around you, bub, you can't define the world on your terms, the world defines itself despite you. Get the hell out of the way of progress. How the hell can you possibly believe that YOU are THAT important? We've all got lives, schmuck, and everything involves give and take. You can't pull that kind of retrograde, con man, grass roots, just out of college bullshit on me. I know what the fuck is going on. Whatayuh think, I don't pay attention? Is that what you think I'm doing? You think I'm lying around not paying attention? YOU'RE one who isn't paying attention or you'd notice the stink.
 
Take that thing with the whatever. How could you do that? You had to have known it was going to a) explode, b) fail, c) roll away, d) never happen, e) fall down, f) get you in trouble, g) spill all over, or h) make me angry, so why did you do it?  Stop acting like an idiot. You're not an idiot (unless you are, in which case I apologize), so stop acting like one. Even real idiots know when it's time to stop acting like one.
 
So get anal cancer and die screaming. Kill yourself and make the world a better place. Git offa my property, you varmint. I'm going to spend the rest of my life pretending that you don't exist. I look forward to testifying at your trial. MY version's the one people are going to believe. I don't need this. I've got better things to do, things like absolutely anything. I could be doing dishes, you fuckwad. Have you seen my kitchen? It's your fault. I blame absolutely everything that's gone wrong in my life on you and you alone. Please disappear. No one will miss you. You're confusing me with someone who cares enough to write.
 
Sincerely,
 
MD
 
"The reasonable man adapts himself to the world. The unreasonable man persists in trying to adapt the world to himself. Therefore all progress depends on the unreasonable man."
- George Bernard Shaw -
 
Cleverest Cartoon of All Time
G-rated read left to right
R-rated read up and down
 
Sick Puppy
 
According to back-tracking Bush, "There is no doubt that Saddam Hussein now has weapons of mass destruction" has mysteriously mutated into "We have discovered dozens of WMD-related-program-activities," leading me to mysteriously postulate that if no death camps had been found in German after WWII, Roosevelt would have justified our attack by claiming that Germany had "Jew-killing-related-program-activities."
 
Fan Mail
 
Sir,
 
    I never cease to be amazed at the way the a few mindless, whining Democrats continue to cry over The Crybaby-in-Cheifs loss to President Bush. Al Gore was crying even before the night of the election was over, well before a winner was LEGALLY declared. President Bush was duly elected by a completely constitutional process. GET OVER IT!!! STOP CRYING ABOUT IT!
    It's been 3 years. You remind me of a black person that blames every bad thing that happens to them on the fact that they are black, even when there are many, many decent, responsible, successful black people. It makes you look small and detracts from any legitimacy you may have. The King is dead! Long live the King!
 
 
Rafer3,
 
Thank you for braving time and space to contact me.
 
a) I'm not a democrat, was not then, and am not now, a Gore supporter.
 
b) Bush was "appointed," not "elected." To be "elected," you have to win the "election." Bush absolutely, beyond the slightest shadow of any doubt, did not win the election. He did not get the most votes, even in the electoral college. The fact he was appointed by a corrupt court makes his presidency technically legal but not technically moral. The election was a fraud, Bush is a thief, and by supporting him you are condoning thievery. I, and millions of others, will never, ever, "get over it."
 
Don't take my word for it...
 

Dear Republican:

GW Bush lost the national election and the election in Florida as well. But, not only did he lose, he benefited from an unprecedented and illegal series of actions, in Florida especially, but also in Tennessee and Washington, D.C.

Vincent Bugliosi's recent book, The Betrayal of America, outlines in vivid detail the extent to which the U.S. Supreme Court not only erred in throwing out the votes of 100 million plus citizens (the majority of which had voted for Gore), but also the extent to which their decision was malicious, illegal and even, yes, criminal. This is a big part of the picture of the Republican coup d'etat, but not the whole picture. Bugliosi's article None Dare Call It Treason gives the main argument on which the book is later based. For a complete listing of articles lambasting the Supreme Court's idiotic decision, including the denunciation of it by 600 plus law professors throughout the land, go to our complete collection here.

The USSC court's idiotic decision was a necessary, but not a sufficient, cause of the coup d'etat. Even before the election took place, tens of thousands of legal voters were illegally purged from the voting rolls by the Florida State Department, run by Katherine Harris under the aegis of Jeb Bush's government. A Database Technologies/Choicepoint Vice President has testified under oath TWICE that his company informed the State of Florida of the extent to which legal voters would be purged from the voting rolls, yet the Florida State Department decided to go ahead in any case. Further, exonerated felons who had served their time and had their citizenship rights restored in other states were illegally required to apply for clemency in Florida, to Jeb Bush's Clemency office. This was not the standard practice and was illegal, as several court cases made clear, cases of which Jeb Bush could not have been ignorant as they happened in his own state and ruled on his practice. Much of this can be found in Gregory Palast's great investigative journalistic work, and we've compiled a complete list here. If you don't like to read, we suggest you at least view Palast's BBC Newsnight broadcast, which ran nationally in Britain. While the national mainstream news carried this story in England, U.S. news consumers are, in the case of the vast majority, completely in the dark. The story was reiterated in the Nation by the Pulitzer Prize Winning journalist John Lantigua here.

Furthermore, the recent spate of articles on the recount confirms that at least 25,000 more voters voted for Gore, and even where ballots should not have been disqualified, a complete recount of all uncounted ballots would have given Gore the win. (See the story at USA Today.) While no intentional illegality is alleged in these areas yet, Theresa LePore's butterfly ballot design is highly suspect, as are the ballots in other counties. We know these ballots were illegal, yet to date, no one has suggested that criminal mischief was involved. While we were told that LePore is a Democrat, the fact is that she only became one to win an election. She has subsequently reverted to "independent," though her longest standing affiliation was Republican. For a list of other recount stories that confirm that Gore won, go to our recount page or our recount links. You should also see all the relevant articles currently on our front page .

Beyond illegality, systematic disenfranchisement disallowed poorer urban voters from recognizing errors, while wealthier, mostly white, northern and mostly Republican voters were warned by the machines when their ballots were invalid, and allowed to revote. (See USA Today article referred to above.)

The case is clear: Gore was the rightful winner not only of the nation, but of Florida. Bush was installed, not elected, and as such, he is not legitimate. His policies are rejected by the vast majority of Americans (66% in the last polls) and they are unfit for the world in its current condition. He is a retrogressive, arch right-wing fanatic who does not recognize nor represent the national will. He should be removed from office, and we will continue to oppose his every action. He has no right to any executive actions at all, let alone the pro-business, anti-majority, anti-labor, anti-environment, anti-world actions that he is taking and proposing to undertake. (For the complete list of articles on Bush's atrocities against humanity, go to the record -- warning, you could spend a week reading them.)

We are working endlessly to remove Bush from office and to stop his every action in the meantime. He is a complete and utter fraud, and a menace to the nation and the world at large, including every species that currently resides here.

Cheers,

Michael Rectenwald,
Founder and Chair
Citizens for Legitimate Government

 
Free Poster
 
I Feel So Much Safer Now
 
"Keep a watch out for people standing near you at retail stores,
restaurants, grocery stores, etc., that have a cell phones in hand.
With these new camera cell phones, they take pictures of your credit
card, and they get your name, number, and expiration date."
- Meria Heller (John Buchanan's Vice-Presidential Candidate and consumer watchdog with teeth.) -
 
History Lesson from Hell
 
The oldest technical manual ever written is Geoffrey Chaucer's A Treatise on the Astrolabe. "The firste partie of this tretys shal reherse the figures and the membres of thyn Astrelabie by cause that thou shalt have the gretter knowing of thyn owne instrument," said Chaucer way back in 1391. Who knew people masturbated with astrolabes?
 
Prediction


"Drug War Totals of the Year."
 




 
Microsoft is suing Mike Rowe, a 17-year-old high school student, because he named his site mikerowesoft.com, a site that was getting only 10 visitors a day until the legal action that's brought it 250,000 visitors. If Mike Rowe's smart, he'll start a porn site called mikerowehard.com.
 
Mr. Conspiracy Says...
 
Has anybody noticed all this coverage of the Democratic candidates? Hard to miss. And how about all that coverage of all the Republican candidates? Has anyone out there seen one single second of coverage of the Republicans running against Bush? Not one. Not one single second. You'd think they didn't exist. They do. Let's start with Bill Wyatt, who has a lot to say, but more importantly, John Buchanan, who is as anti-new-world-order as Kucinich and the only candidate on either side to openly advocate Bush's impeachment. Just imagine if a Democrat did that. You'd have heard about it. Get out the word to Republicans that they've got a choice too.
 
Gallery of the Week
No, that's not a pool,
it's astonishing sidewalk art done by Kurt Wenner
 
Don't Take My Word For It
 
"Champaign for my real friends. Real pain for my sham friends."
- Tom Waits -
 
"It makes no sense to industrialize this incomparable wilderness area when there's only about six month's worth of economically recoverable oil in the entire NPR-A, and it would take at least 10 years to get it to market. The United States has only 3 percent of the world's proven oil reserves and we use 25 percent of the world's produced oil. We can't drill our way to oil independence. We have to wean ourselves off oil."
- Charles Clusen: Alaska Project director at NRDC -
 
"All a man has that he can really call his own are his values. Once he sells them out he has nothing."
- Col. Sherman Potter -
 
"The ring of power corrupts whoever possesses it."
- Lord of the Rings -
 
"What do the Emir of Kuwait and the working poor of the United States have in common? Not much, except when it comes to paying for health care in the United States. They all pay the highest price: up to 500% more than the hospital receives from insured patients."
 
    "Republican staff members of the US Senate Judiciary Committee infiltrated opposition computer files for a year, monitoring secret strategy memos and periodically passing on copies to the media, Senate officials told The Globe.
    "From the spring of 2002 until at least April 2003, members of the GOP committee staff exploited a computer glitch that allowed them to access restricted Democratic communications without a password. Trolling through hundreds of memos, they were able to read talking points and accounts of private meetings discussing which judicial nominees Democrats would fight -- and with what tactics."
 
"The notion that a radical is one who hates his country is naive and usually idiotic. He is, more likely, one who likes his country more than the rest of us and is thus more disturbed than the rest of us when he sees it debauched. He is not a bad citizen turning to crime; he is a good citizen driven to despair."
- H.L. Mencken -
 
"We may have all come on different ships, but we're in the same boat now."
- Martin Luther King, Jr. -
 
"Don't waste yourself in rejection, nor bark against the bad, but chant the beauty of the good."
- Ralph Waldo Emerson -
 
"The government would rather talk about Star Wars and other sophisticated things. As a result, we have children who need remedial programs and prison programs. We neglect them when they're young and spend more later on prisons. I think we're damn silly if we don't work on the preventive programs and make our children productive citizens. All of us in society have to pick up the slack and play our role in nurturing children."
 
"I'm going to turn on the light, and we'll be two people in a room looking at each other and wondering why on earth we were afraid of the dark."
- Gale Wilhelm -
 
"The truth is flexible, white hot, but it soon becomes brittle if tempered with cold bullshit"
- Robert Williams -
 
"Of the all the things I've lost, I miss my mind the most."
- Ozzy Osbourne -
 
"All I want is a warm bed and a kind word and unlimited power."
- Ashleigh Brilliant -
 
"You cannot make a man by standing a sheep on its hind legs. But by standing a flock of sheep in that position you can make a crowd of men."
- Sir Max Beerbohm -
 
"If you can keep your head when all about you are losing theirs, it's just possible you haven't grasped the situation."
- Jean Kerr -
 
"Cowardice, as distinguished from panic, is almost always a lack of ability to suspend the functioning of the imagination."
- Ernest Hemingway -
 
"When people are free to do as they please, they usually imitate each other. Originality is deliberate and forced, and partakes the nature of a protest."
- Eric Hoffer -
 
"If you hate a person, you hate something in him that is a part of yourself. What isn't part of ourselves doesn't disturb us."
- Hermann Hesse -
 
"An expert is someone who knows some of the worst mistakes that can be made in his subject and how to avoid them."
- Werner Heisenberg -
 
"A million zeros joined together do not, unfortunately, add up to one."
- Carl Jung -
 
"Great spirits have always found violent opposition from mediocrities. The latter cannot understand it when a man does not thoughtlessly submit to hereditary prejudices but honestly and courageously uses his intelligence."
- Albert Einstein -
 
"We shall not cease from exploration, and the end of all our exploring will be to arrive where we started and know the place for the first time."
- T.S. Eliot -
 
"In my opinion, the greatest single failure of American education is that students come away unable to distinguish between a symbol and the thing the symbol stands for."
- Paul Lutus -
 
"The best way to predict the future is to invent it."
- Alan Kay -
 
"With each passing year, because of advances in computer technology, there are more things, each more sophisticated, that we aren't allowed to do any more."
- Paul Lutus -
 
"Be careful while reading health books, you might die of a misprint."
- Mark Twain -
 
"He who asks is a fool for five minutes, but he who does not ask remains a fool forever."
- Chinese Proverb -
 
"Truth never damages a cause that is just."
- Mahatma Gandhi -
 
"People are always blaming their circumstances for what they are. I don't believe in circumstances. The people who get on in this world are the people who get up and look for the circumstances they want, and, if they can't find them, make them."
- George Bernard Shaw -
 
"I am quite serious when I say that I do not believe there are, on the whole earth besides, so many intensified bores as in these United States. No man can form an adequate idea of the real meaning of the word, without coming here."
- Charles Dickens -
 
"Americans are willing to go to enormous trouble and expense defending their principles with arms, very little trouble and expense advocating them with words. Temperamentally we are ready to die for certain principles (or, in the case of overripe adults, send youngsters to die), but we show little inclination to advertise the reasons for dying."
- E. B. White -
 
"If you understand, things are as they are. If you do not understand, things are as they are."
- Gensha: Zen Master -
 
"I was only pretending to be dumb. That was our plan, remember?"
- Spongebob Squarepants -
 
"When I hear any man talk of an unalterable law, the only effect it produces on me is to convince me that he is an unalterable fool"
- Rev Sydney Smith -
 
"The trouble with being tolerant is that most people think that you don't understand the problem."
- Merle Meacham -
 
"A proverb is a short sentence based on long experience."
- Miguel de Cervantes -
 
"Intelligence, it might be said, has caused our troubles; but it is not unintelligence that will cure them. Only more and wiser intelligence can make a happier world."
- Bertrand Russell -
 
"A brave man is the one who dares to look the devil in the face and tell him he is a devil."
- James A. Garfield -
 
"All personal deceit eventually leads to social deceit."
- Noah benShea -
 
"Sundance is weird. The movies are weird. You actually have to think about them when you watch them."
- Britney Spears -
 
Everything Else
 
Mars to earth: Fuck you!
 
Next vacation, be sure to visit the Unsupervised Childrens Alligator Petting Zoo.
 
Random Headline: "Lesbians Beat Out Bacon in 'Things to Add to Something to Make It Better' Poll."
 
Tell me you can't use free maps of every country on earth.
 
 

Contact George W. Bush - president@whitehouse.gov
Contact Jeb Bush - jeb.bush@myflorida.com
Contact Saddam Hussein - president@whitehouse.gov
Contact Kim Jong Il - eng-info@kcna.co.jp
Contact Jacques Chirac - france-presse@un.int
Contact the Pope - accreditamenti@pressva.va
Contact the Democratic Candidates:  Wesley Clark, Howard Dean, John Edwards, Dick Gephardt, Bob Graham, John Kerry, Dennis Kucinich, Joe LiebermanAl Sharpton
Embassy of France in the US: 202-944-6000
German Embassy in the US: 202-298-4000
Embassy of the Russian Federation: 202-298-5700
Embassy of the People's Republic of China: 202-328-2500
White House switchboard: (202) 456-1414
Contact your Senator - http://www.senate.gov/senators/senator_by_state.cfm
Contact your Representative - http://www.house.gov/house/MemberWWW.html
House and Senate switchboard: (202) 224-3121
Links to Central Government Agencies - http://www.firstgov.gov/
 
 
Don't let this happen to you

 
Link to Disinfotainment Today with one of these tasteful banners.
 
 
or suffer the consequences.
 
 
Acknowledgment

dIsInFoTaInMeNt ToDaY is free and may be reproduced in any form. It consists of information from dozens of sources, cut up, thrown in the air, and recycled randomly. It is sent all over the place, so I apologize if you're seeing the same thing twice. If you see a joke, graphic, or news item that came from or through you, thanks, send more, and please accept the fact that much of dIsInFoTaInMeNt ToDaY is unacknowledgeable, and if I sought permission from everyone whose bastardized material showed up here, I'd never get anything else done. Please note that I don't even put my own name on it. If you're still pissed off, hey, it's either satire or fair use.

Thanks,

Satan

 
 
 
 
 

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'TBH Politoons'

Click Here!



Thanks, again, Tim!

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Reader Link

'Wiggum Or Bush?

Play the 'Wiggum or Bush' game


Thanks, Astro!

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Novakula the Bully

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from Mark

Another Bumpersticker

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Selected Readings

from that Mad Cat, JD

AHNULD GET A BUCK JOB

DON'T FUCK WITH FRANKEN

THE SOTU FOOL ON THE HILL

A SITTING DUCK

THE POODLE POOP

HAVE A BANANA DAIQUIRI CHIMP BOY

DICKHEAD LAYS AN EGG

BRING 'EM OIL

THE CHICKENHAWKS SQUAWK

DOWN THE CHIMP HOLE

DICKHEADS DILEMMA

It's All the Democrats' fault  [zepps_essays]

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bagnews 
blog

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In The Chaos Household

Last Night

Beautiful day, clouded up late & it's raining now. Yippee!

The field trip took us to the Cerritos Center for the Performing Arts, just down the 91 freeway, and was sponsored by a group from the LA Opera.
They presented 'The Magic Dream', a loose rework of Mozart's 'The Magic Flute'. Four live musicians and 6 singers hitting the most familiar themes of the work - they did a fabulous job!

If anyone writes & the mail bounces it's because my spam guards seem to have been made by hormel. Wait a bit & try again.

Talked to dear old Dad - he turned 79, and the Babe baked him his birthday apple pie. ^5 for the Babe!

Tonight, as the 2nd contestant was giving his answer during 'Final Jeopardy,' the freaking genuises at KABC decided to go to New Hampshire for a redundant 'update' on Kerry's win. So, the 2nd largest market in the country was left hanging on who won & what was the correct answer. The bastids.

Leno's 'tribute' to Jack Paar was mawkish, poorly written & horribly delivered.



Tonight, Wednesday, CBS begins the night with '60 Minutes II', followed by a RERUN 'King Of Queens', then the Series Finale of 'Becker', followed by '48 Hours'.
On a RERUN Dave are Alec Baldwin, soccer phenomenon Freddy Adu and Cyndi Lauper. (R)
Scheduled on a FRESH Craiggers are Jami Gertz, Jason Ritter, and Chuck Niles.

NBC starts the night with I don't know what - meant to check out their website, but forgot - besides, they're pissing me off between Leno, Miller & starting programs a minute before the top of the hour. Anyway, the first hour is going to be thrown away in surrender to Faux' 'American Idol' - this is where the 'Trump Atrocity' was originally scheduled (which they've moved to Thursday to see if it can feed off the ratings of 'Friends' & 'Will & Grace' - 'Scrubs' has been banished to Tuesdays).
The 2nd hour of primetime brings another RERUN 'West Wing' (starts 1 minute before the top of the hour), followed by another RERUN of 'Law & Order' (starts 1 minute before the top of the hour).
Scheduled on a FRESH Jay are Ashton Kutcher, Spokane Streakers, and Fefe Dobson.
On a RERUN Conan (from 11/13/03), are Dolly Parton and Steve Irwin.
Scheduled on a FRESH Carson Daly are Donald Trump, Dennis Rodman, and Elefant.

ABC opens the night with a RERUN 'My Wife & Kids', followed by a FRESH 'It's All Relative', then a FRESH 'Bachelorette', followed by a FRESH 'Celebrity Mole: Yucatan'.
Scheduled on a FRESH Jimmy Kimmel are Hank Azaria, two-time Daytona 500 champion Michael Waltrip, with this week's guest co-host Fred Willard.

The WB offers a FRESH 'Smallville', followed by a FRESH 'Angel'.

Faux has a FRESH 'American Idol', followed by a RERUN 'The O.C.'.

UPN has a RERUN 'Enterprise', followed by a RERUN of last night's 'America's Next Top Model'.

A&E has 'American Justice', 'Biography' (Tom Selleck), another 'American Justice', and 'City Confidential'.

AMC offers the movie 'For Your Eyes Only', followed by the movie 'Diamonds Are Forever', then the movie 'Dr. No'.

BBC  -    [6pm] 'BBC World News';    [6:30pm] 'Cash in the Attic' - Jenkinson;    [7pm] 'House Invaders' - Northfields;    [7:30pm] 'Changing Rooms' - Hitchin;    [8pm] 'The Life Laundry' - Poplar;    [8:30pm] 'House Doctor' - Episode 3;    [9pm] 'My Hero' - Car;    [9:40pm] 'Keeping Up Appearances' - Episode 1;    [10:20pm] 'Keeping Up Appearances' - Episode 2;    [11pm] 'The Life Laundry' - Poplar;    [11:30pm] 'House Doctor' - Episode 3;    [12am] 'My Hero' - Car;    [12:40am] 'Keeping Up Appearances' - Episode 1;    [1:20am] 'Keeping Up Appearances' - Episode 2;    [2am] 'House Invaders' - Northfields;    [2:30am] 'Changing Rooms' - Hitchin;    [3am] 'My Hero' - Car;    [3:40am] 'Keeping Up Appearances' - Episode 1;    [4:20am] 'Keeping Up Appearances' - Episode 2;    [5am] 'The Life Laundry' - Poplar;    [5:30am] 'House Doctor' - Episode 3;   and   [6am] 'BBC World News'.    (ALL TIMES EST)

Bravo has 'West Wing', an hour show on the 'Golden Globes', 'Keen Eddie', and another 'Keen Eddie'.

Comedy Central has 'MAD TV', 'Crank Yankers', 'Insomniac', 'South Park', another 'South Park', and 'Chappelle's Show'.
Scheduled on a FRESH Jon Stewart, is Gov. Christie Whitman.

History has 'Modern Marvels', 'War Planes', 'Jet Engines', and 'Modern Marvels'.

SciFi has the movie 'The Flintstones', followed by the movie 'The Flintstones In Viva Rock Vegss'.

TCM celebrates Katharine Hepburn most of the night.
  [6:30am]    'Our Vines Have Tender Grapes' (1945);
  [8:30am]    'You Can't Buy Everything' (1934);
  [10am]    'They Won't Forget' (1937);
  [12pm]    'Boom Town' (1940);
  [2pm]    'Strange Cargo' (1940);
  [4pm]    'Manpower' (1941);
  [6pm]    'In This Our Life' (1942);
  [8pm]    'The African Queen' (1951);
  [10pm]    'The Lion In Winter' (1968);
  [12:30am]    'Dragon Seed' (1944);
  [3am]    'Mary of Scotland' (1936);

  [5:30am]    'MGM Parade Show #21' (1955).    (ALL TIMES EST)


Thursday  -  01/29

TCM pays a 24-hour tribute to the remarkable career of director William A. Wellman.
  [6am]    'The Boob' (1926) SILENT ;
  [7:15am]    'Night Nurse' (1931) [ *Pre-Hayes Code*];
  [8:30am]    'Other Men's Women' (1931) [ *Pre-Hayes Code*];
  [9:45am]    'Safe In Hell' (1931) [ *Pre-Hayes Code*];
  [11am]    'College Coach' (1933) [ *Pre-Hayes Code*];
  [12:30pm]    'Lilly Turner' (1933) [ *Pre-Hayes Code*];
  [1:45pm]    'The Robin Hood Of El Dorado' (1936);
  [3:15pm]    'Lady Of Burlesque' (1943);
  [4:45pm]    'The Next Voice You Hear' (1950) [ WARNING:  stars Nancy Davis (Reagan)];
  [6:15pm]    'My Man And I' (1952);
  [8pm]    'Battleground' (1949);
  [10pm]    'The Story of G.I. Joe' (1945);
  [12am]    'Wild Boys of the Road' (1933) [ *Pre-Hayes Code*];
  [1:15am]    'Nothing Sacred' (1937);
  [2:30am]    'The Public Enemy' (1931) [ *Pre-Hayes Code*];
  [4am]    'Heroes For Sale' (1933) [ *Pre-Hayes Code*];

  [5:30am]    'Festival of Shorts #28' (2000).    (ALL TIMES EST)



Anyone have any opinions?

Or reviews?



(See below for addresses)

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Foreign Minister of Chile Maria Soledad Alvear, poses for a photo after awarding actor Cristopher Reeve the Great Cross Bernardo O'Higgins medal Tuesday Jan. 27, 2004, in New York. Reeve was awarded the medal for his solidarity with the fight for democracy in Chile in the late-1980s.
Photo by Claudia Heiss

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The Information One-Stop

Moose & Squirrel

Moose & Squirrel Information One-Stop

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Received Award For AIDS Campaigning

Dionne Warwick

Singer Dionne Warwick received an award from the US government in recognition of her efforts in raising funds for AIDS research.

The American Citizen Honor Award was presented to Warwick, 62, by US Ambassador to Singapore Frank Lavin to recognize her 20-year involvement in humanitarian efforts against Acquired Immune Deficiency Syndrome.

The five-time Grammy-winner, in Singapore for a concert on Thursday, said in a press conference she thought education was the most important tool in the fight against AIDS.

Dionne Warwick

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Upstaged Hilton Sisters at Party

Prince

The Hilton sisters got upstaged at one of the Golden Globe Awards afterparties.

Prince popped up as a surprise guest around midnight at In Style magazine's party following Sunday's awards show. He played guitar on "Brickhouse" and his signature hit "Kiss," but left the singing to the band.

After two songs, he blew a quick kiss to the crowd and hopped off the stage.

Prince

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A hot-air balloon bearing the face of Dutch painter Vincent Van Gogh rises in the air above the western Swiss village of Chateau d'Oex January 24, 2004. Chateau d'Oex is celebrating its 26th annual alpine hot-air balloon festival this weekend.
Photo by Dominique Favre

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'Hollywood Animal'

Joe Eszterhas

The BIG buzz in Tinseltown the past few days has been about veteran screenwriter and noted bad boy Joe Eszterhas' tell-all memoir Hollywood Animal, just hitting bookstores. Among Eszterhas' best-known films are ''Flashdance,'' ''Jagged Edge,'' ''Basic Instinct'' and ''Showgirls.''

Few who have worked with the Hungarian native are spared. Chicago native and longtime Paramount chairman Sherry Lansing is accused of nepotism -- specifically arranging for her husband, fellow Chicagoan and Oscar winner William Friedkin, to be hired as director of the Eszterhas-scripted ''Jade'' -- without people knowing it was her idea.

Legendary studio honcho and producer Robert Evans' reputation as a womanizer and hard-core party boy is skewered. Uber-agent Michael Ovitz is accused of making physical threats. The massive egos of Sylvester Stallone and Disney head Michael Eisner are laid bare.

For some wonderfully snarky details, Joe Eszterhas


Thanks, Tim H!

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To Receive NAACP Award

Dave Matthews Band

Dave Matthews Band will receive the special Chairman's Award at the upcoming NAACP Image Awards for its devotion to social and environmental causes and its "dignified representation of people of color," the civil rights group has announced.

With the awards, the National Association for the Advancement of Colored People honors people and companies that support positive change for people of color in arts and entertainment. The honor will be bestowed at the March 6 awards ceremony in Los Angeles. Fox will broadcast the program on March 11.

Dave Matthews Band

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In The Kitchen With BartCop & Friends

bartcook

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Selling Folk Catalog as Downloads

Smithsonian Label

Nonprofit label Smithsonian Folkways Recordings is making its entire collection of 33,000 folk and world music songs available as downloads for 99 cents apiece. The service will debut April 1 on the label's own site, www.folkways.si.edu, and later this spring on the Smithsonian's http://www.globalsound.org site.

The Folkways catalog was donated to the Smithsonian Institution in Washington, D.C., after the death of label founder Moe Asch in 1986. The recordings, which date back to 1948, include material by Woody Guthrie, Leadbelly, Brownie McGhee and Pete Seeger.

Smithsonian Label

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This ca. 100 B.C.E.-100 C.E. pentelic marble statue called 'Young Boy,' is part of the exhibit 'Coming of Age in Ancient Greece,' at the Onassis Cultural Center in New York. The displays range over childhood scenes on painted vases, as well as sculptures, grave monuments and relics of ancient toys like rattles, dolls, tops, hoops and animal bones used in games of chance.

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Fallen For Older Women

Jack Nicholson

Hollywood legend and notorious lady-killer Jack Nicholson has developed a taste for older women and says he is "crazy" about his latest co-star, veteran actress Diane Keaton.

Nicholson, 66, told German magazine "TV Spielfilm" that he developed an affection for Keaton, 62, when he saw her walking around in haircurlers on the set of "Something's Gotta Give," for which she was nominated for the Best Actress Oscar on Tuesday.

"I love that. And she is unpredictable, like all of my friends. I'm crazy about her," Nicholson was quoted as saying.

Despite his renowned weakness for younger women, Nicholson said he had begun falling for the charms of women from his own generation.

"A mature women is no slave to fashion. And her conversation is not based around the latest slang or trends."

Jack Nicholson

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Gets Temporary New Band Member

The Dead

Gov't Mule's Warren Haynes will perform with The Dead as the band heads out on the road this summer. The guitarist, whose band toured with The Dead in 2002, will begin performing with the band next month, including a performance at the Dead's Second Annual Winter Jam in San Francisco on Feb. 9.

In a statement, Haynes said "getting to sing some of the Hunter/Garcia songs will be a real honor."

The Dead

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Hearing Postponed

Courtney Love

A court hearing for singer/actress Courtney Love, who faces two felony counts of possession of a controlled substance, was postponed Tuesday after the judge said "additional investigation" was needed before the case could proceed.

Love met privately with Superior Court Judge Elden S. Fox for eight minutes before her brief court appearance. Fox said her hearing would be delayed until Feb. 11 because of "certain issues as it relates to an investigation on this matter."

It was the second time the hearing was delayed.

Courtney Love

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Formerly 'The Vidiot'

pissed

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Urges Shareholder Protest Vote

Roy Disney

Roy Disney, the former board member of Walt Disney Co. who stepped down to oppose Chief Executive Michael Eisner, on Tuesday urged shareholders to send an angry message by voting against Eisner and three other directors standing for board reelection.

"Now is the time for all Disney shareholders to take the first step to bring needed change to The Walt Disney Company," said Roy Disney and Stanley Gold, who also resigned in protest, in a letter to shareholders ahead of the March 3 annual meeting.

Roy Disney, nephew of company founder Walt Disney, resigned from the board in November and began a vocal campaign calling for Eisner to step down, accusing him of driving out many executives and failing to set a viable long-term strategy for the entertainment conglomerate.

Roy Disney

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A lone walker leaves footprints in the sand at Kailua Beach on the island of Oahu in Kailua, Hawaii, just after sunrise January 27, 2004. Sunny skies, tropical breezes and temperatures in the low 80 degrees are expected today after days of rainy windy weather, and as the eastern coast of the U.S. is mired in sleet, snow and icy winter conditions.
Photo by Lucy Pemoni

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26 Violations For 'Bubba'

Clear Channel

Federal communications regulators hit Clear Channel Communications Inc. with a $755,000 proposed fine on Tuesday for airing indecent material during the "Bubba the Love Sponge" syndicated radio program.

On the eve of a congressional hearing into television and radio indecency, the Federal Communications Commission also moved to fine San Francisco's KRON4 TV station $27,500 for allowing viewers to glimpse the penis of a performer during a morning segment on the "Puppetry of the Penis" stage show.

More than two dozen U.S. House of Representatives lawmakers last week introduced legislation that would allow the FCC a ten-fold increase in the current $27,500 fine per incident.

Clear Channel, cited for 26 violations on the Bubba radio show, called on the FCC to convene a task force to develop indecency guidelines that would apply across television, radio, cable and satellite networks.

Clear Channel


Thanks, Fred!

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Friendship with Darwin's Niece Revealed

Robert Browning

Letters locked away for more than 40 years have revealed how Victorian poet Robert Browning built up a close relationship with the niece of naturalist Charles Darwin, auction house Christie's said Tuesday.

Browning corresponded with Julia Wedgwood, a girl 21 years his junior, in 1863, a couple of years after the death of his wife and fellow-poet Elizabeth Barrett, a spokeswoman for the auction house said. More than 70 letters between them will be sold at auction at the beginning of March.

The friendship with Julia was in no sense a love affair, Christie's said, but Browning made no secret of his fondness for the girl, who was part of the Wedgwood pottery family.

Julia's papers, part of a wider collection up for sale after the death of U.S. collector Halstead B. Vander Poel, also include two letters from Charles Darwin responding to her comments on the "Origin of Species"-- the book that put forward the idea of evolution. She also corresponded with other authors of the day.

Robert Browning

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In Memory

Jack Paar

Jack Paar, who held the nation's rapt attention as he pioneered late-night talk on "The Tonight Show," then told his viewers farewell when still in his prime, died Tuesday. He was 85.

Paar died at his Greenwich, Conn., home as a result of a long illness, said Stephen Wells, Paar's son-in-law.

Paar's years on NBC enlivened an otherwise "painfully predictable" TV landscape, wrote The New York Times' Jack Gould in 1962. "Mr. Paar almost alone has managed to preserve the possibility of surprise."

Paar had taken over the flagging NBC late-night slot in July 1957; Steve Allen had departed some months earlier. Allen's show was a variety show; Paar's a talk show.

Soon, everyone was staying up to watch Paar, then talking about his show the next day. Even youngsters sent to bed before Paar came on parroted his jaunty catch phrase, "I kid you not," with which he regularly certified his flow of self-revealing stories.

Since the mid-1960s, Paar had kept mostly out of the public eye, engaging in business ventures and indulging his passion for travel.

Paar played host to Muhammad Ali when he was still known as Cassius Clay, to a pleasantly pickled Judy Garland, and to the outrageous pianist-composer Oscar Levant. Entertainers Paar championed included Jonathan Winters, Bob Newhart, Carol Burnett, Woody Allen and Bill Cosby.

Paar's circle of guests included leading politicians. During the 1960 presidential campaign, John F. Kennedy made a triumphant appearance — so much so, that a few days after the election, Paar got a letter from Joseph P. Kennedy, the proud father, gushing, "I don't know anybody who did more, indirectly, to have Jack elected than your own good self."

A man of boundless curiosity and interests, Paar was charming, gracious and famously sentimental: He could shed tears, as he put it, just from "taking the Coca-Cola bottles back to the A&P."

He could also be volatile, pettish and confounding. And never so much as in February 1960, when, making headlines, he emotionally told his thunderstruck audience that he was leaving his show. It was the night after a skittish NBC executive had judged obscene, and edited out, a story by Paar where the initials "W.C." were mistaken for "wayside chapel" instead of "water closet."

A month later, the network managed to lure Paar back. Returning on the night of March 7, he was greeted with generous applause as he stepped before the cameras. Then he began his monologue on a typically cheeky note: "As I was saying, before I was interrupted ... "

Born in Canton, Ohio, in 1918, Jack Harold Paar left school at 16 for a job as a radio announcer, and soon found success on various stations as a comic-disc jockey.

Jack Paar

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Three-month-old okapi baby Lulu, left, looks back under the protection of her 7-year-old mother Layla at 'Zoorasia' zoo in Yokohama, southwest of Tokyo, Thursday, Jan. 22, 2004. Lulu, now weighs 114 kilograms (251 pounds), was born Oct. 21, 2003 as the second baby to 330-kilogram (727-pound) Layla and an okapi father which were transfered to the zoo six years ago from the United States. It is quite rare for the endangered artiodactyls to bear more than one baby and Layla giving birth of her second babyLulu, that means a pearl in Swahili, is reportedly the first case in Asia.
Photo by Chiaki Tsukumo

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Check Out BAGnews

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Custom Kaleidoscopes by Ed the "BearMan"

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The Iraq Page

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George W. Bush for President 2004

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Who served?

The Chickenhawk Database

Congressional Members with Military Service

Who Died and Made You President? :: The Bean Magazine

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100 Most Banned Books

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