'Best of TBH Politoons'
Thanks, again, Tim!
The Artful Dodger
THE HOLLYWOOD HUSTLE
Here are some recent screenplay deals that might make it through development hell and show up on your local movie screens in a few years.
Remake mania
Denzel Washington will star in the remake of the Frank Sinatra classic, "The Manchurian Candidate." Also starring will be Jon Voight and Meryl Streep.
Prediction: The original movie exploited our Cold War paranoia but we're living in a different, more enlightened age...right? Right? In any event, Washington is sure to bring a sure blend of suspense and rage to the role, and audiences always spark to seeing their beloved stars turn into baddies on screen. But again, the question arises: can middle management studio execs be so bad at their jobs that they can't develop new scripts to shoot?
*****
More Meryl
Meryl Streep will step into "Lemony Snicket," Jim Carrey's next cinematic extravaganza, to be directed by Brad Silberling. The script is based on the popular children's book series.
Prediction: If the director doesn't allow spectacle to overwhelm simple entertainment, they may have something here. But can he restrain Carrey's manic facial gymnastics long enough to pull a real performance out of him?
*****
Phoenix rising
Director John Moore will direct Dennis Quaid and Giovanni Ribisi in a remake of the Jimmy Stewart drama "The Flight of the Phoenix."
Prediction: It's a shame that the original film has been largely overlooked, so the best that can come of this remake is that it might prompt moviegoers to check out the first one on video. And, not to beat a theme to death, but once again a remake gets the green light – what's the thinking here? Can it be that creative execs are such complete wussies that they don't know how to develop an original script? Who hires these people? Uncles?
*****
Meow
Halle Berry will star in "Catwoman" for Warner Brothers. Also starring will be Julia Roberts' ex, Benjamin Bratt.
Prediction: You can hear the collective sigh coming from the executive suites as WB makes the safest choice possible. Here's another notch in their fat franchise belt, which will spawn a new round of comic books, action figures and cartoons featuring Catwoman. Then in 2005 look for the sequel. Ditto 2007. The Catwoman trilogy. Own it on home video today.
*****
Look, up in the sky
"W.A.S.P.S." will star Cameron Diaz as one of the first women pilots to fly into battle during World War 2.
Prediction: Sorry, just can't see it. Diaz is a capable, entertaining actress but her charm lies in our being able to SEE her. How are we going to see her when she's all covered up in a flight suit and helmet? There will be a slight curiosity factor (who's going to play the streetwise ethnic character from New York, who's going to play the tough but fair commanding officer, etc.) but that's about it....
*****
Steve Martin, hyphenate
Steve Martin, Jason Schwartzman and Claire Danes will star in the big-screen version of Martin's book, "The Shopgirl."
Prediction: When given free rein, Martin has had a tendency to be ponderous, but this project has already vaulted beyond the routine by pulling Danes on board. The movie will be compelling, and Danes should help elevate the heavier emotional parts of the book.
~ The Artful Dodger
Selected Readings
from that Mad Cat, JD
from Mark
Another Bumpersticker
In The Chaos Household
Last Night
Pleasant weather is still here.
Ran out to the Valley today.
Watched the travesty passing as a 'debate'. The moderator stunk, pre-scripted sound bites prevailed, and please, anybody but Ahnold.
Tonight, Thursday, CBS begins the night with a FRESH 'Survivor: Pearl Islands', followed by the
Season Premiere of 'CSI: Crime Scene Investigation', then the Season Premiere of
'Without A Trace'.
Scheduled on a FRESH Dave are Colin Powell and Jennifer Garner.
Scheduled on a FRESH Craiggers are Danny DeVito and Jet.
NBC opens the night with the 50-minute Season Premiere 'Friends', followed by the 35-minute Season Premiere
of 'Will & Grace', then the 35-minute Series Premiere of 'Coupling', followed by the Season Premiere of 'ER'.
Scheduled on a FRESH Jay are Alicia Silverstone, Hollywood's most talented dogs, and Nickelback.
Scheduled on a FRESH Conan are Diane Lane, Wanda Sykes, and Jonny Lang.
Scheduled on a FRESH Carson Daly are Christina Ricci, Michael Rapaport, and Lil Jon & The East Side Boyz featuring The Ying Yang Twins.
ABC starts the evening with a FRESH 'Threat Matrix', followed by a FRESH 'Extreme Makeover', then 'Primetime Thursday'.
Scheduled on a FRESH Jimmy Kimmel are Ben Stiller, competitive eater Eric "Badlands" Booker, and Obie Trice.
The WB has a FRESH 'Steve Harvey's Big Time', followed by a FRESH 'Jamie Kennedy', then a FRESH
'What I Like About You', followed by a FRESH 'Run Of The House'.
Faux has the Season Finale of 'Temptation Island'.
UPN has 'WWE Smackdown!'.
A&E, depending on your coast either starts or nearly wraps the night with 'Live By Request Starring Elvis Costello', then 'Biography', (Jane Withers), 'Who Killed Laci Peterson', and 'Live By Request Starring Elvis Costello', again.
AMC has the movie 'Rio Conchos', followed by the movie 'In Harm's Way', then the movie 'Von Ryan's Express'.
BBC -
[6pm] 'BBC World News';
[6:30pm] 'Talking Movies' - September 25 - 30, 2003;
[7pm] 'Ground Force' - Newport;
[7:30pm] 'Changing Rooms' - Barnstaple;
[8pm] 'House Invaders' - Rutland;
[8:30pm] 'House Invaders' - Blackheath;
[9pm] 'Faking It' - Hot Dog Vendor to Chef;
[10pm] 'Coupling' - Flushed;
[10:40pm] 'Behind the Screen' - Coupling;
[11pm] 'So Graham Norton' - Miles O'Keefe, Anne Robinson;
[ 12am] 'Faking It' - Hot Dog Vendor to Chef;
[1am] 'Coupling' - Flushed;
[1:40am] 'Behind the Screen' - Coupling;
[2am] 'House Invaders' - Rutland;
[2:30am] 'House Invaders' - Blackheath;
[3am] 'So Graham Norton' - Miles O'Keefe, Anne Robinson;
[3:30am] 'So Graham Norton' - Liza Minelli;
[4am] 'Faking It' - Hot Dog Vendor to Chef;
[5am] 'Coupling' - Flushed;
[5:40am] 'Behind the Screen' - Coupling; and
[6am] 'BBC World News'. (ALL TIMES EDT)
Bravo has 'West Wing', the movie 'Light It Up', 'Queer Eye', and 'West Wing'.
Have no idea who is on Jon Stewart.
History has 'Modern Marvels', the movie 'Battle Of The Bulge', and 'Hardcore History'.
SciFi has the movie 'Highlander II: The Quickening', followed by the movie 'Highlander: Endgame'.
TCM seems to be celebrating the differences between city-slickers and rubes, hicks & crackers, with a little Elvis, then 2 of my favorite movies, and more than justa tad o' irony.
Andy Griffith is brilliant as 'Lonesome Rhodes' in 'Face In The Crowd,' and an uncut version of 'Deliverance', so grab a banjo, set a spell - - - then squeal like a pig?
[6am] 'Make Me A Star' (1932);
[7:30am] 'A Star Is Born' (1937);
[9:30am] 'Between Two Women' (1937);
[11am] 'The Girl Downstairs' (1938);
[12:30pm] 'The Adventures of Jane Arden' (1939);
[1:30pm] 'Full Confession' (1939);
[3pm] 'Vigil In The Night' (1940);
[5pm] 'The Case of the Black Parrot' (1941);
[6pm] 'B.F.'s Daughter' (1948);
[8pm] 'Kissin' Cousins' (1964);
[10pm] 'A Face In The Crowd' (1957);
[12:15am] 'Deliverance' (1972);
[2:15am] 'Professional Sweetheart' (1933);
[4am] 'The Tenderfoot' (1932); and
[5:30am] 'MGM Parade Show #18' (1955). (ALL TIMES EDT)
Actor Anthony Hopkins, right, and his wife Stella, pose for photographers Wednesday, Sept. 24, 2003, in the Hollywood section of Los Angeles. Hopkins was honored today with the 2,237th star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame.
Photo by Ric Francis
The Information One-Stop
Moose & Squirrel
Hosting Academy Awards
Billy Crystal
Billy Crystal is planning a reunion with Oscar. The star of "City Slickers" and "Throw Momma from the Train" said Wednesday he has signed on to host the Academy Awards for the eighth time.
The upcoming Oscar show on Feb. 29, 2004, will mark another collaboration between Crystal and movie producer Joe Roth, who is overseeing the telecast. They previously worked together on the 2001 comedy "America's Sweethearts."
Billy Crystal
Marauding Dogs Kill 4 Peacocks
Hunter S. Thompson
Marauding dogs are being blamed for menacing people in this hamlet near Aspen and killing four peacocks owned by writer and journalist Hunter S. Thompson.
"I found them half-eaten lying on the road. We have bodies down here," he said. "Anything that kills four animals, four people or four of anything on my property is going to die one way or another."
Thompson, who has raised birds for decades, said he was disturbed by losing four of his prized peacocks. He has given several as gifts to friends and the birds' plumes are in high demand among his friends.
Hunter S. Thompson
Publisher Seeks Recall of Chinese Edition
'Living History'
Sen. Hillary Clinton's publisher on Wednesday demanded the recall of the Chinese language printing of the senator's autobiography, calling it an inaccurate version which omits several passages critical of the country's human rights record.
At issue are 10 pages in the book, where the Chinese publisher deleted passages detailing Clinton's views on China and her travels there. Simon & Schuster called the omissions a breach of contract and made the offending passages available on its web site in both English and Mandarin.
The book has sold 200,000 copies in China in its first month of release there, making it the best selling foreign political memoir in Chinese history.
For more, 'Living History'
Urges Students to Hit the Books
Chuck D
Rapper Chuck D, who helped pioneer political rap music with his group Public Enemy, urged black college students to forgo hip-hop's gangster style and hit the books, not the streets.
"There is no such thing as a college thug," the 43-year-old told several hundred students crammed into an auditorium at Albany State University last week. "It's either the block ... or you become the smartest (expletive) around."
He criticized rappers who use racially offensive slurs as common slang, and said too often so-called street credibility is valued over true knowledge among young blacks.
Chuck D
Music Legend Ray Charles, center, celebrates his 73rd Birthday Tuesday, Sept. 23, 2003, with fellow musician Willie Nelson, left, and producer Quincy Jones, in Charles' recording studio in Los Angeles. At Tuesday's festivities Charles announced a blues songwriting contest which he will judge with help from Flea from the Red Hot Chili Peppers, Alicia Keys and Roger Waters of Pink Floyd.
Photo by Dan Steinberg
To Appear On 'All Of Us'
Beyonce
Multi-media star Beyonce will appear on the small screen this fall with a cameo appearance on an episode of All Of Us, the UPN sitcom executive-produced by Will Smith and wife Jada Pinkett-Smith.
All Of Us stars Duane Martin as Robert, a local broadcaster balancing his obligations to both the mother of his young son and his fiance.
Beyonce
Named Grand Marshal of Winterfest Boat Parade
David Cassidy
Last year, David Cassidy caught his first glimpse of the Winterfest Boat
Parade from his Fort Lauderdale home. This year, he'll be right up front as
grand marshal, and maybe he'll bring his guitar.
The singer-songwriter-actor-producer said Tuesday he is looking forward to
participating in the annual event on Dec. 13.
"I'm really proud to be a part of this community," said Cassidy, 53, who
moved to Fort Lauderdale a little over a year ago. "And I love this event,
so much so that I had to go and buy a boat for it."
But Cassidy, won't get to take his own boat onto the Intracoastal
Waterway for the parade just yet. As the grand marshal of the formally named
"Cingular Wireless Winterfest Boat Parade presented by Nokia," Cassidy will
be up front on the Lady Windridge, the luxury yacht that leads the parade of
more than 100 yachts, boats and kayaks.
David Cassidy
Thanks, EJ2E!
Delivered Birthday Cake to Mickey Rooney
Jack Palance
Jack Palance said he'd always wanted to work with Mickey Rooney. He got his chance at a Pennsylvania fair.
Palance was the surprise guest who delivered the birthday cake on stage as Rooney celebrated his 83rd birthday at the Bloomsburg Fair Monday night. Rooney and his wife, Jan, had performed earlier at the fair, opening for the Smothers Brothers.
Palance, who lives in nearby Drums, was asked to deliver the cake, which depicted scenes from some of the hundreds of movies Rooney has performed in, by friend and fair President Fred Trump.
Jack Palance
Bear Raided Cabin
David Letterman
David Letterman told viewers on CBS' "Late Show" about a bear that came into his home before dawn and started rummaging around his kitchen.
"And there, standing in my kitchen, is the largest bear I've ever seen in my entire life," he said. "I don't know how big, but he was the hugest bear I've ever seen in my kitchen. ... So I closed the door."
Letterman called his friend and ranch manager, Chip Kearns of Choteau, who "knows everything and runs everything and is a Marine and he's the guy you want to call when you've got a bear in your kitchen."
After chasing the bear around the house for a few hours, they called in Lightner — and his M-80s. They dropped the large firecrackers into a room where the bear was sleeping, chasing it out.
David Letterman
In The Kitchen With BartCop & Friends
Top U.S. Charts with 1960s Classic
Rolling Stones
The Rolling Stones cast a satanic glow over the U.S. music industry on Wednesday as a reissue of their 1968 opus "Sympathy for the Devil" opened at No. 1 on the singles sales charts, a spokesman said.
"Sympathy" was released in the United States last week as a CD single featuring seven versions of the song -- a pair of remixes each from producer duo the Neptunes, English DJ Fatboy Slim and another duo, Full Phatt, as well as the original recording. A slightly different configuration opened at No. 14 in the United Kingdom earlier this month.
Rolling Stones
NBC Finds New Outlets
'Coupling'
NBC has found television stations that will air its new sitcom, "Coupling," after two of its affiliates rejected the new comedy because of racy content.
WNDU-TV, the NBC affiliate owned by the University of Notre Dame in South Bend, Ind., said last week that the show's sexual jokes "push the envelope well beyond the boundaries of our community's standards."
Similarly, NBC affiliate KSL-TV in Salt Lake City has also refused to air the show, which debuts on Thursday.
NBC has contracted with WSBT-DT, the UPN affiliate in South Bend that can only be seen on cable or HDTV sets, and KUWB-TV, the WB affiliate in Salt Lake City, to air the series for the full season, network spokeswoman Rebecca Marks said Wednesday. The shows will air at 10 p.m. local time Thursday in those markets. (The network will air it 9:30 p.m. EDT.)
'Coupling'
The San Diego Zoo's unnamed male giant panda cub lets out a squawk during an examination by the zoo's veterinary staff on September 24, 2003 at the SBC Giant Panda Research Station. The zoo's animal care staff say that the cub is going through the normal stages of development, weighing three pounds and measuring one foot long, one month after birth. The male cub is just the second giant panda to be born in the United States and survive past four days.
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Engagement News
Kevin James
"The King of Queens" star Kevin James is getting hitched.
James proposed to his longtime girlfriend, Stephanieanna Zantua, the actor announced Wednesday during an appearance on "Live! With Regis and Kelly."
The wedding date has yet to be set, he said.
Kevin James
AFI Gives Award
Charlton Heston
And the first-ever Charlton Heston award goes to ... Charlton Heston.
The American Film Institute announced Wednesday it has presented Heston with the new award named in his honor, intended to acknowledge people who have made distinguished contributions to movies and television and the AFI itself.
The Charlton Heston award will be given periodically as the institute determines worthy recipients.
Charlton Heston
Club Gets Late Reprieve
Bottom Line
New York's famed Bottom Line nightclub got a last-minute reprieve on Wednesday when its landlord, New York University, agreed to a 30-day halt in its eviction action.
The nearly 30-year-old Greenwich Village club, whose acts have ranged from Bruce Springsteen to jazz trumpeter Miles Davis and blind country guitarist Doc Watson, could have been forced to close its doors on Wednesday over $185,000 in back rent it owes NYU, which was considering other uses for the space.
The two parties said they agreed during a recess at a court hearing to try to settle their differences and negotiate a new lease for the West Fourth Street club before their next date in civil court on Oct. 23.
Bottom Line
Formerly 'The Vidiot'
Sued Wrong Person
RIAA
In a possible case of mistaken identity, the recording industry has withdrawn a lawsuit against a 66-year-old sculptor who claims never to have even downloaded song-sharing software, let alone used it.
Sarah Seabury Ward, of Newbury, Mass., and her husband use their computer to e-mail with children and grandchildren, said Electronic Frontier Foundation attorney Cindy Cohn, who has worked with the family. They use a Macintosh, which cannot even run the Kazaa file-sharing service they are accused of using illegally.
Nonetheless, Ward was one of 261 defendants sued by the recording industry this month for illegal Internet file-sharing. Ward was accused of illegally sharing more than 2,000 songs, including rapper Trick Daddy's "I'm a Thug."
RIAA
Same Scripts
'Coupling'
There are few clues in the new NBC sitcom "Coupling" premiering Thursday night to tell you that the show is virtually a carbon copy, word for word, line for line, of one of Britain's most popular sitcoms.
With only minor changes, the American cast of the cheeky new comedy have worked from the same scripts that their British counterparts worked from.
Perhaps the biggest difference between the initial U.S episodes and its British version is the time difference. Eight minutes had to be chopped off the original scripts to fit American network commercial time. The BBC is a non-commercial station and its version of the show fills 30 minutes.
For more, 'Coupling'
Holding a ceremonial rose-bedecked baton, award-wining composer/conductor John Williams poses after being named Grand Marshal of the 115th Rose Parade, in ceremonies at Tournament House in Pasadena, Calif., Wednesday, Sept. 24, 2003. Winner of dozens of Academy Awards, Grammys, Emmys and other awards, Williams is best known as the composer of some of the best-known modern movie orchestral works, including several 'Star Wars,' and 'Indiana Jones' films, 'Superman' and 'Close Encounters of the Third Kind,' as well as leading the Boston Pops for 14 years. Appropriately, the theme of this year's parade, which steps off on in Pasadena on Jan. 1, 2004, is 'Music, Music, Music.'
Photo by Reed Saxon
Re-Elected SAG President
Melissa Gilbert
Melissa Gilbert was re-elected Tuesday as president of the Screen Actors Guild — her second term after winning a bitter battle for the post two years ago.
Gilbert received 15,670 votes out of 31,640 cast, winning by 2,428 votes over SAG treasurer Kent McCord. Also running was guild activist Gordon Drake.
"I'm just glad that I don't have to go up there and clean out my office," Gilbert said after Tuesday's vote.
Melissa Gilbert
Lands U.S. Series
Graham Norton
Gay Irish comedian Graham Norton, whose saucy wit and celebrity interviews have made him a household name, is coming to America courtesy of Comedy Central.
The cable channel beat out NBC and ABC to sign Norton to a two-year deal that will give him at least 13 episodes of a U.S. version of his Channel Four talk/variety show, as well as hosting duties on various specials.
Norton's vehicle will be Comedy Central's first hour-long series. Each episode will be produced during the week before it airs, likely in New York or Los Angeles.
Graham Norton
Urges Doctors to Prescribe Books
Laura 'Pickles' Bush
First lady Laura Bush, campaigning to boost literacy in America, urged doctors on Wednesday to prescribe books for babies during check-ups.
Mrs. Bush, a librarian and teacher, said when babies went for regular check-ups, doctors should write out prescriptions for books or, if possible, send them home with one.
"That really adds the whole authority of the medical community (on the importance of reading)," Mrs. Bush told ABC's "Good Morning America" show, which launched a campaign to get more books into school libraries.
Laura 'Pickles' Bush
In Memory
Sonora Webster Carver
Sonora Webster Carver, the first woman to ride the diving horses at Steel Pier in Atlantic City and the inspiration for the 1991 Disney movie "Wild Hearts Can't Be Broken," died Sunday. She was 99.
In 1924, she made history when she plummeted 40 feet on horseback into a tank of water. The stunt was first performed by W.F. "Doc" Carver, who became her father-in-law. In 1931, she went blind from detached retinas suffered after one of her horses, Red Lips, hit the water off-balance.
Carver continued to ride the high-diving horses until World War II.
During her career, Carver was part of an act that included her sister, Arnette Webster French, who died in 2000, and their friend Josephine K. DeAngelis. DeAngelis died on Saturday at 92.
The diving horses were a popular attraction at the pier before being discontinued in the 1970s after complaints from animal rights activists. But Carver insisted the horses loved the dives and were not forced to jump, according to Atlantic City historian Allen Pergament.
Her 1961 autobiography, "A Girl and Five Brave Horses," was the inspiration for the Disney film.
Sonora Webster Carver
Resident painted storks search for food at the Minneriya National Park near Polonnaruwa 170 km (106 miles) northeast of Colombo, Sri Lanka, September 23, 2003. The storks are found in India, China and South East Asia, around lagoons and marshes.
Photo by Anuruddha Lokuhapuarachchi
'The Osbournes'
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