'Best of TBH Politoons'
Thanks, again, Tim!
Best of Jazz From Hills
TrimmedBush and Hedges
(5/20/04)
The Hummer's Gonna Be A Bummer This Summer
Ok, let's see, I have a military vehicle that makes me certifiably cool with the country club set, it's huge and uses just a shit load of gasoline. Crude oil prices are at $41.00 at the time of this writing and I'm starting to wonder if my inane quest for status from people who judge success by the hugeness of my vehicle might have been better used by helping someone in need or buying a real hummer from a whore down on third street.
The Hummer H2 sales have fallen for eight consecutive months. Hmmm. I wonder if gas mileage of a whopping ten miles to the gallon might factor into the sales of this yuppy-mobile since at $2.00/gallon (at the time of this writing)will get you 1/3rd of the way from Santa Fe, New Mexico to Albuquerque, New Mexico. I have a Nissan Altima, nicelittle ride, and I can get half way from two referenced points in space. What's the better deal?
Why, other than the status and impression of people who are impressed by large military vehicles on city streets, why in the fuck would you want one? Safety? Are you gonna get shot at? Performance? They hardly handle like a BMW. Affordability? See above. Comfort? If you like wearing helmets and playing Johnny-Seven Army games. Economy? 10 miles to the gallon. Durability? Well, if you're gonna be in Baghdad this summer, it might be the thing to drive through mountains of sand.
Jeez. I'll never understand people who think that the size of your car really impresses people. What it shows to me that your values are fucked up and you need to re-evaluate what and why you spend money on, or your dick is possibly the size of a Vienna Sausage. You're not gonna be buried with your Hummer, sorry. It won't fit in your casket.
--
Posted by phillip vincent to to TrimmedBush
This Week
Blackadder
Well way back in WWI they didn't have all us good liberal superstar's to go
over and entertain the troops. So what does General Melchette come up with
when he finds out that all those Germans who have been killing Russians on
the Eastern front are now coming to kill Tommies on the Western front? Why
a show to take the men's minds of the fact they are going to be
slaughtered.
Lucky for the men The Yanks are now in the fray and there're
plenty of Charlie Chaplin films. Well, Blackadder sees his chance to have a
nice long out of town run (say in Paris or London). If only Lt. George can
keep his dress on.
This weeks episode also has the return of "Bob" from
series 2. Not the best but there are a few laughs in this one.
~ Mr. Hawk
Dissent is not Terrorism
Freedom is not Legislated
Thanks, again, Mr. Hawk!
New CD
'Into the Blue'
Now in Blog format
Humor Gazette
Smart satire on the presidency as performance art ...
Starring Ronald Reagan, Clint Eastwood, John Wayne and George W. Bush
from Mark
Another Bumpersticker
Readaer Comment
Re: Absinthe
Saw your blurb about absinthe and thought you might
like to know...
Try the recipe found at erowid.com,
using wormwood purchased at
www.bouncingb.com.
Not bad really, no worse than Jaegermeister. You
must absolutely distill the product, which is a pain
in the ass, but eliminates the worst of the taste.
FYI
FTE
Thanks, F!
Think I've found my summer project!
Selected Readings
from that Mad Cat, JD
In The Chaos Household
Last Night
So much 'June Gloom' the sun never broke through. Nice, cool, breezy day.
Was warmer in Seattle than here.
Discovery Communications announced a three-year agreement on June 15, 2004 to become the new title sponsor of five-times Tour de France champion Lance Armstrong's(C) U.S. Postal Services team. Starting next year, U.S. Postal Services, the only American outfit to have won the Tour de France, will be known as the Discovery Channel Pro Cycling team. Armstrong is seen with Judith McHale(L), President and COO of Discovery Communications and Billy Campbell, President Discovery Networks in Silver Spring, Maryland.
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The Information One-Stop
Moose & Squirrel
Clinton Memoirs
'My Life'
Copies of "My Life," which is setting pre-order records on Amazon.com online booksellers, is set for publication next Tuesday, but avid readers will know plenty beforehand of what is inside the 957-page book for which Clinton was reportedly paid a $10 million advance.
Starting at midday on Friday, Time Warner Inc.'s AOL.com will offer audio excerpts of the book as read aloud by Clinton, and Infinity Broadcasting Corp. will air excerpts on the radio.
Clinton's first print interview in connection with the book reportedly has gone to Time magazine, said a spokesman for the book's publisher, Alfred A. Knopf, a division of Bertelsmann AG's Random House unit. Time hits newsstands on Monday but is typically released to the media on Sunday.
On Sunday, CBS' "60 Minutes" airs the first television interview with Clinton about the book. Excerpts from that may also be released before the broadcast, a spokesman said.
Clinton will appear in bookstores in New York on Tuesday to autograph copies of the book. Once it is released, Clinton is set to appear in interviews with Oprah Winfrey, NBC's "Today" show and ABC's "Good Morning America." Next Thursday, for anyone still curious, Clinton will answer questions in a Town Hall format broadcast online by AOL online and by Infinity on radio.
'My Life'
1st Major Newspaper Endorsement
John Kerry
John Kerry picked up his first major newspaper editorial endorsement today, in the Philadelphia Daily News. Not only that, in a clear departure, the paper then outlined a detailed strategy on "how to put him in the White House."
The surprise early pick, played dramatically on the front page of the tabloid, observed that, "Unlike the current White House occupant, Kerry can lead America to a brighter, better future. He has shown the personal courage, compassion, intellect and skill to lead this country in a time of war abroad and economic troubles at home. He is a serious man for a serious time.
The Daily News said that the Bush administration has been marked by failure, "failure to shepherd the country through a tough economic downturn, failure to keep the nation focused on the true enemies to our security.
"He has failed in even the one challenge he set out for himself at the beginning of his administration - to bring the country together. His has been one of the most ideologically driven and divisive administrations in recent times.
John Kerry
A giant inflatable replica of the Science Fiction Museum and Hall of Fame icon sits on top of the Space Needle in Seattle, Wednesday, June 16, 2004, in preparation for the museum's grand opening on Friday.
Photo by Ted S. Warren
Honorary Degree
Bob Dylan
Scotland's oldest university announced Wednesday it was awarding an honorary doctorate to the laureate of folk-rock, Bob Dylan.
The University of St. Andrews said Dylan would be made an honorary doctor of music at its June 23 summer graduation ceremony.
St. Andrews, northeast of Edinburgh, was founded in 1413 and is Britain's third-oldest university. Its current students include Prince William, second in line to the throne.
The university said Dylan, 63, had accepted only one previous honorary degree, from Princeton University in 1970.
Bob Dylan
Returning to Quebec
Triumph the Insult Dog
Triumph the Insult Comic Dog, who brought howls of protest after slagging French-Canadians during an appearance on Late Night With Conan O'Brien, will visit La Belle Province again.
The foul-mouthed puppet will appear in his one-dog show, Make Poop Not War, on July 22 as part of the Just for Laughs comedy festival. In February, the politically incorrect Triumph mocked French-speaking Quebecers at the Quebec City winter carnival, calling them "obnoxious" and "dull" and telling them to learn to speak English.
Just for Laughs said in a news release Wednesday that Triumph will "extend his paw in a demonstration of conciliation and understanding" and will show unbroadcast excerpts of his last trip to Quebec.
Triumph the Insult Dog
In The Kitchen With BartCop & Friends
Concert Archive Opens
Jerry Garcia
The Grateful Dead were pioneers in releasing recordings from the band's vast archive of concert tapes, but the "vault" of side projects by founding guitarist Jerry Garcia is only now opening widely.
After long delays to resolve Garcia's will following his 1995 death, the psychedelic rock icon's estate released earlier this month the first in a planned four-a-year series of concert recordings by Garcia's side bands.
Called "Pure Jerry," the series opens with a three-disc set from the Jerry Garcia Band performance on July 29-30, 1977. It shows Garcia indulging a voracious appetite for musical styles, ranging beyond rock to include reggae, gospel and American standards.
For a lot more, Jerry Garcia
A French baker stands next to a bread creation by French designer Jean-Paul Gaultier put on display at the Cartier Foundation for Contemporary Art in Paris June 15, 2004. Gaultier turned the foundation into a gigantic bakery with designs made of bread and wicker. The bread creations have been produced by l'Equipe de France de Boulangerie.
Photo by Jacky Naegelen
Jazz Journalists Association Jazz Awards 2004
Shorter & Holland
Wayne Shorter and Dave Holland were off preparing to launch a summer tour this weekend on the West Coast in a super-quartet with pianist Herbie Hancock and drummer Brian Blade, but they were among the big winners at the Jazz Journalists Association Jazz Awards 2004.
For the second straight year, tenor saxophonist and composer Shorter, who rose to prominence with Hancock in Miles Davis' legendary 1960s quintet, was chosen Musician of the Year on Tuesday. Shorter also was a repeat winner for Album of the Year - for "Allegria," his first studio recording as a leader since 1994 - and his quartet again was named the top small ensemble.
The 83-year-old pianist-composer Dave Brubeck won the award for Lifetime Achievement in Jazz in balloting conducted among some 400 members of the Jazz Journalists Association. Another pianist-composer, Vijay Iyer, the son of immigrants from India, was chosen Up & Coming Artist of the Year.
Shorter & Holland
Formerly 'The Vidiot'
Leaving 'Access Hollywood'
Pat O'Brien
It's a wrap for "Access Hollywood" co-host Pat O'Brien. O'Brien is leaving the syndicated entertainment TV show after seven years and will be replaced by Billy Bush, who now serves as the show's East Coast correspondent.
Bush, a first cousin to resident Bush, will join co-host Nancy O'Dell, who has signed a new multiyear contract, according to NBC Universal Television Distribution, which produces and sells the program.
O'Brien's last day on the air will be Friday.
Bush, 32, has been with "Access Hollywood" nearly three years. His father, Jonathan, is the brother of former President George H.W. Bush.
Pat O'Brien
Sanrio Co unveils its platinum tiara jewellery decorated with 'Hello Kitty' charm at the company headquarters in Tokyo, June 16, 2004. The tiara, encrusted with 167 pink and black colour diamonds and seven pearls, will go on sale in Japan from July to commemorate Hello Kitty's 30th anniversary. Sanrio's Kitty tiara will be available by made-to-order at three million yen ($27,300).
Photo by Toshiyuki Aizawa
Target Voters' Favorite Shows
Campaign Ads
Watch the daytime soap opera "The Young and the Restless" or the late-night talk show "Jimmy Kimmel Live" and you're likely to see an ad for Democrat John Kerry. Tune into the crime reality series "America's Most Wanted" or catch a few innings of a Major League Baseball game and it's resident Bush's face that tends to show up during the commercial breaks.
The two presidential campaigns, tapping their record-breaking accounts, have spent more than $140 million on television ads in 21 states and on national cable networks. With an eye on the swing vote, both are airing many of their spots on programs that reach viewers of any political persuasion - and placing some spots on specific shows to maximize turnout among their core supporters.
Kerry's ads appeared far more often than Bush's during daytime programs watched primarily by female viewers, a key part of Kerry's base. He ran ads on soap operas like "All My Children" and programs like "The Ellen DeGeneres Show," as well as Democratic-leaning courtroom programs, such as "Judge Judy," and late-afternoon talk shows, such as "Montel Williams," which tend to be watched by blue-collar workers and unemployed.
Kerry also has worked to maximize his support among blacks, another key Democratic constituency, by advertising on UPN, a network that attracts predominantly urban ethnic audiences with sitcoms such as "The Parkers" and "Eve." Bush was not on the network.
Unlike Bush, Kerry has aired commercials on the WB, a network geared toward young people, by advertising during series like "One Tree Hill" and "Smallville," teen-angst dramas that attract voters ages 18 to 34. Kerry also reached out through ads to viewers under age 50 who watch late-night comedy shows, like "Late Show with David Letterman," and sitcoms, such as "The King of Queens" and "Friends."
The Republican's commercials ran often during crime reality shows like "Cops," which appeal to white males, and tough-on-crime shows that tend to reach a slightly older Republican audience - prime-time dramas like "Law and Order" and "JAG."
Campaign Ads
London Auction
Hendrix Memorabilia
An auction of rock 'n' roll memorabilia sold an original Jimi Hendrix studio recording and some copyrights to his artwork Wednesday, but bidders found prices for John Lennon's last known autograph or Prince's first studio recording too high.
A first-generation recording of Hendrix's "Burning of the Midnight Lamp" in its original box sold for $36,500. The song first appeared on Hendrix's 1968 album "Electric Ladyland."
Copyrights of 18 artworks by Hendrix also sold for $75,270. The artwork itself was sold last year.
Hendrix Memorabilia
Swapan Nath, a Sadhu or Hindu holy man, performs yoga during his prayers at the Kamakhya Temple in Gauhati, capital of the northeastern Indian state of Assam, Wednesday, June 16, 2004. Sadhus from different parts of India have come to the temple to attend the Ambubasi festival, which will begin on June 22.
Photo by Anupam Nath
Glastonbury Festival
"She-pee"
Female revellers at the Glastonbury Festival will be able to enjoy this year's show without straining their bladders -- courtesy of stand-up urinals.
Organisers have installed two sets of the urinals around the main Pyramid stage for the exclusive use of women, complete with "concierge" attendants to ensure a dignified experience.
Key to the arrangement is a special, anatomically shaped funnel to be handed out to each user.
For the rest, "She-pee"
Scared Of Lightning
James Joyce
As the world celebrates the centenary of "Bloomsday", a date made famous by James Joyce's "Ulysses", one of the rare Frenchmen still alive to remember said the legendary Irish writer was terrified by lightning.
Claude Suter, a retired architect, was only 12 when he met Joyce in 1935 in Paris at sittings at his father's studio, sculptor Auguste Suter, who was making a bust of the Irish novelist.
"He lived in Passy (in western Paris) and would come to my father's studio in Denfert-Rochereau (southern Paris) with his daughter Lucia, who I played with," Suter said at a "Bloomsday" centennial event this week at the Irish Cultural Centre in Paris.
"He was overbearing and made me scared. He had a squint and wore thick glasses," Suter added.
"He was absolutely terrified of lightning and of storms, and could always tell when one was coming. One day he was taken by surprise by a storm at our place, and fell to the floor trembling. We had to cover him up with blankets."
James Joyce
Giant panda Shishi, who is suffering from cataracts, lies in a cage at a zoo in Guangzhou, southern China, June 16, 2004. Veterinarians are unable to perform a surgical operation to heal Shishi, born in 1978, due to his old age.
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'The Osbournes'
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