'TBH Politoons'
Thanks, again, Tim!
Baron Dave Romm
Auld Lang Syne
By Baron Dave Romm
The song Auld Lang Syne was written, perhaps cobbled together from older material, by Robert Burns and became a staple when used repeatedly by Guy Lombardo at the right moment.
Alas, it's not in English and most people don't know the words beyond the first line, even getting the second line wrong. (No "auld" in front of "lang syne"). And there's no reason to: It's not really a very interesting song, and the major advantages are that it's a slow tune that can be sung by drunken crowds, interrupted at any moment by noisemakers.While there's no dearth of New Years Parties around the planet, You may, of course, ring in the New Year differently, from singing children's New Years songs to performing a Mummer's Play.
Indeed, why is January 1 New Years Day? The Romans established the date arbitrarily, and doesn't coincide with the solstice or spring planting or Rosh Hashona or anything traditionally religious or logical. Mostly, it was Roman politics. Many cultures celebrate it differently such as not sweeping during the day in Hawaii (why bother?). In Japan, the celebration lasts from Jan. 1 to Jan 3 and includes "year forgetting parties" and special decorations.
So in many ways it's fitting that our traditional New Years song is in a language we don't speak, asking a question that it doesn't really answer very well. Let's compare Auld Land Syne to other songs with rhetorical questions.
| Should auld acquaintance be forgot, And never brought to min'? Should auld acquaintance be forgot, And days o' lang syne? |
Translation: "Should you forget your old friends of long ago?" Geeze, this is a stupid question. You're standing next to your friends, partying with them, getting drunk and blowing noisemakers at them. Your old friends are at a different party, maybe one you visited earlier that evening. Other old friends sent you Holiday Greeting Cards, or you anguished over whether to send one to them. At the beginning of a new year, you're wondering if you should forget them? Please, try not to forget where you put your car keys, and this year see if you remember to go home with the person you came with. | ||
| Man:If I were a carpenter and you were a lady Would you marry me anyway Would you have my baby? Woman: If you were a carpenter and I were a lady I'd marry you anyway I'd have your baby Man:If a tinker was my trade would I still find you Woman:I'd be carrying the pots you made Following behind you |
Much better rhetorical questions, since the woman in question is fecund no matter what career choice her romantic but vocationally confused lover takes. Other career paths he should ask about, to get her approval should he enter that field: Energy futures trader, segregationist, arms dealer, pilot for Democratic senatorial candidates, tobacco company executive, Presidential press secretary. | ||
|
Does your chewing gum lose its flavour on the bedpost overnight? If your mother says don't chew it, do you swallow it in spite? Can you catch it on your tonsils, can you heave it left & right? Does your chewing gum lose its flavour on the bedpost overnight? | Practical questions, to be sure, but remain unanswered in the song. Unlike the unspecified acquaintances asked about in Auld Lang Syne, the history of chewing gum is quite interesting and even timely for the season, since dentist William Finley Semple patented chewing gum on Dec. 28, 1869, and referenced in this timeline. I think this is a much more appropriate song to sing on New Years Eve since it references candy, relatives, the physical well-being of the singer and a loss that occurs in the middle of the night. Who's with me on this? | ||
| Why does the sun go on shining Why does the sea rush to shore Don't they know it's the end of the world 'Cause you don't love me any more Why do the birds go on singing Why do the stars glow above Don't they know it's the end of the world It ended when I lost your love I wake up in the morning and I wonder Why everything's the same as it was I can't understand, no, I can't understand How life goes on the way it does Why does my heart go on beating Why do these eyes of mine cry Don't they know it's the end of the world It ended when you said goodbye | Well now. This is a very similar set of questions
to those asked in Auld Lang Syne, yet much more heart-rending
in its sense of loss and nihilistic continuity. Can Skeeter Davis be
the next Robert Burns? Unlike the strange foreign words in the traditional song, The End of the World is easily sung, easily remembered, and sounds just as good when played by a tired band to a large group of drunken revelers. Heck, drunken revelers would be an improvement over Skeeter's unique song stylings. In fairness, I should point out that her rhetorical questions do have answers. The sun goes on shining due to nuclear fission. (See also stars glowing.) The sea rushes to shore because of the tidal effects involving the orbital positions of the Earth, Sun and Moon. While fewer birds sing in the dead of winter (and fewer at midnight of Dec. 31), they don't follow a calendar and, as mentioned above, the exact cutoff time sequence that determines when one year ends and another begins is completely arbitrary and does not impact the animal kingdom.
As to why the singer(s) go on living, that is demanded of the Homeland
Security Act of 2002: A portable wetware unit (aka "you") exists
to provide economic stimulus in order to help the United States win
the War on Terror. Hope this clears up any confusion. | ||
Further rhetorical questions may be directed to the author at the address below. Answers are not guarenteed. Like, duh.
Baron Dave Romm is a conceptual artist and a noble of Ladonia with a radio show, a very weird CD collection and an ever growing list of political links. He reviews things at random for obscure web sites. You can read all his music recommendations from Bartcop-E here.
Have You Registered Yet?
Free Rolling Stones Concert In LA
In The Chaos Household
Last Night
Beautiful, sunny, crisp day.
Still planning to visit 'the snow' today.
Computer is acting peculiar tonight. Time to get Gladys in for some upgrades.
On a fresh Dave are Adam Sandler and burlesque revue Pussycat Dolls.
On a fresh Craiggers are Owen Wilson, Elizabeth Berkley, and Joan Osborne.
NBC has nothing fresh, either - RERUN 'Fear Factor', RERUN 'Third Watch', and RERUN 'Crossing Jordan'.
On a fresh Jay are Tom Selleck, Samantha Martin and her performing chickens, and Laura Pausini.
Scheduled on a RERUN Conan are Topher Grace, Jamie-Lynn Sigler, and Kevin Brennan.
Scheduled on a RERUN Carson Daly(from 11/19/02), are John Cleese and Good Charlotte.
ABC has MNF, where the 49ers visit Georgia's Little Lambs in St. Louis. Depending on your time zone, RERUN 'Monk', either before or after the game.
The WB has nothing fresh - RERUN '7th Heaven' and RERUN 'Everwood'.
Faux has the movie 'Ransom'.
UPN has nothing fresh - RERUN 'The Parkers', RERUN 'One On One', RERUN 'Girlfriends', RERUN 'Half & Half'.
Anyone have any opinions?
Or reviews?
(See below for addresses)
St. Petersburg
'Father Frost'
A carnival participant marches through the center of St. Petersburg, December 29, 2002 as he takes part in the New Year performance. The main Russia's Father Frost,
equivalent to Santa Claus, arrived on Sunday to St. Petersburg.
Photo by Alexander Demianchuk
Network 'Coverage'
New Year's Eve
_ You know the night's main man: 73-year-old Dick Clark is on duty in Times Square, as usual, for his "Rockin' Eve." It airs on ABC beginning at 10 p.m. EST and continuing
through 1:05 a.m. (with a break for local news from 11 to 11:35 p.m.).
_ There's something for the kids, too: On MTV, "New Year's Eve Pajama Party" will find Carson Daly with co-hosts Brittany Murphy ("8 Mile") and Ashton Kutcher ("That '70s Show")
all cozy in their pj's at MTV's Times Square studio for two hours of merriment, starting at 10:30 p.m.
_ Those who feel like parting company with the Eastern partying establishment may opt for "America's Party," with "American Idol" host Ryan Seacrest anchoring coverage from
Las Vegas from 11 p.m. to 12:30 a.m. (which, translated into Vegas time — 8 to 9:30 p.m. — suggests the New Year won't actually arrive until this broadcast is over; but odds are, no one cares).
_ And TV hasn't forgotten those of you who prefer to ring in the new year with not exactly live but, rather, cartoon coverage. Cartoon Network has recruited Carl and Brak to
officiate from Times Square as episodes from the channel's "Adult Swim" unreel from 11 p.m. to 3 a.m.
"Adult Swim's New Year's Eve Bash!" will consist of "Sealab 2021," "Harvey Birdman, Attorney at Law" and "Space Ghost Coast to Coast," as well as "Aqua Teen Hunger Force" (which
features Carl, a fat slob from New Jersey) and "The Brak Show" (starring demented space pirate Brak).
At midnight, Meatwad (co-star of "Aqua Teen Hunger Force") will be dropped, ceremonially, in Times Square.
_ One final option is for New Year's revelers seeking a show without some version of "party" in its title: A few blocks up the street from Times Square, "Live from Lincoln Center"
presents the New York Philharmonic in an all-Gershwin New Year's Eve concert. The program includes "An American in Paris" and excerpts from Gershwin's masterpiece, "Porgy and Bess," all under the baton of Lorin Maazel in his first New Year's Eve concert
with the Philharmonic and his first "Live From Lincoln Center" appearance. The broadcast airs on PBS at 8 p.m. (check local listings).
New Year's Eve 'Coverage'
Women Nicer To Kiss On Screen
Moore said she had no problem preparing for her screen kiss with Toni Collette in "The Hours," which has already been touted as a leading Oscar contender.
"She smelled so nice," Moore told Britain's Sunday Mirror.
"You kiss an actor and you don't know what they are going to smell like. But you kiss a girl and she is going to smell good. And she's very soft. They're soft and they smell nice. Guys don't."
Julianne Moore
Tuba, Benguet
Ferdinand Marcos
Filipinos walk past a damaged bust of former Philippine dictator Ferdinand Marcos after it was blown up by unidentified person before dawn on a hillside in Tuba, Benguet, about 124 miles north of Manila, Dec. 29, 2002. Police said no one was hurt by the blast.
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Musical Taste
Ozzy Osbourne
He may be the king of metal, but Ozzy Osbourne prefers a quieter, gentler brand of music at home. "The Beatles are my favorite thing," Osbourne told mtv.com. "A lot
of people think I'm crazy for liking Creed . . . I like the older stuff [from] when I was younger, like [Led] Zeppelin, the Beatles, [Paul] McCartney, [John] Lennon
albums. Early [David] Bowie albums like 'Ziggy Stardust.' " Sadly, Osbourne notes: "My heroes are dying off now. George Harrison recently died, which was tragic . . . I'm
listening to Paul McCartney's new album right now."
Ozzy Osbourne
Outearns Madonna, Queen
J.K. Rowling
Harry Potter's creator, J.K. Rowling, was the top woman earner in Britain this year, a new list revealed Sunday.
Her annual pay of $77 million was six times greater than the salary of Queen Elizabeth, according to an annual list of The Mail on Sunday newspaper.
The writer was followed on the list by pop superstar Madonna's pay of 27 million pounds. The U.S. singer and actress qualified for the list because she lives in
London with her film director husband Guy Ritchie.
Next in line were investment banker Robin Saunders, "Weakest Link" TV quiz presenter Anne Robinson and Welsh actress Catherine Zeta-Jones.
J.K. Rowling
In The Kitchen With BartCop & Friends
Twin Watch Continues
Barbara & Jenna
Former President Bush and his son, Gov. Jeb Bush, returned Sunday from a three-night Caribbean cruise with family and security agents, showing no signs of a recent illness that has
sickened passengers on some recent cruises.
About a dozen Bush family members - including former first lady Barbara Bush, the governor's wife and their two sons - made the trip with about 2,500 other passengers. resident Bush's
daughters Jenna and Barbara were listed on the ship's manifest.
The Bushes' ship stopped in Nassau and at Disney's private island, Castaway Cay, and passengers said they often saw the family.
The Bushes paid their own expenses, while the government paid for their security detail.
Barbara & Jenna
Leading The Way
Dolphins
Dolphins lead the British super maxi yacht Canon Leopard off Marimbula during the Sydney-Hobart race, December 27, 2002. Australian maxi Alfa Romeo was ahead by
about five miles as it led the Sydney-Hobart fleet into the notoriously rough Bass Strait, where strong winds were expected to slow the fleet.
Photo by Daniel Forster
Involved in Club Dispute
Donald Trump Jr.
Donald Trump Jr., 24, was hit in the head with a beer stein early Saturday morning at the Comedy Cellar in Greenwich Village, the New York Post reported, citing law-enforcement sources.
The Post said customers at a neighboring table thought Trump's beer might have splashed on a women. Two men threw steins at Trump, slicing a gash in his head that required 28 stitches
to close, the newspaper reported. He was treated at St. Vincent's Hospital and released.
Two men, both 23, were arrested and charged with assault.
The newspaper said no charges were filed against Trump, whose mother is Ivana Trump.
Donald Trump Jr.
Heading To Broadway
'Urban Cowboy'
A musical version of the John Travolta-Debra Winger movie has tentatively set a March 20 opening at New York City's Broadhurst Theatre, with preview performances to begin in late February. The show stars newcomer Matt
Cavenaugh in the Travolta role and Jenn Colella as the strong-willed woman who loves him.
The score will be a combination of country favorites including Clint Black's "The Hard Way," the Dixie Chicks' "Cowboy Take Me Away" and Shania Twain's "Honey, I'm Home" as well as several new songs by composer Jason Robert Brown.
"Urban Cowboy," set in that famous Houston watering hole Gilley's, was written by Aaron Latham, who also wrote the screenplay for the 1980 movie, and Philip Oesterman.
'Urban Cowboy'
Popularity Nosedives
British Royals
After two funerals, two butler scandals and a Golden Jubilee, the popularity of Britain's royal family has plummeted, according to a new poll.
The soundings in Sunday's Observer newspaper showed that only one in two Britons now believe the House of Windsor will last more than 20 years -- down from 58 percent a year ago.
And one in four believe the institution will not survive more than 10 years after the death of Queen Elizabeth, who is now 76.
She famously called 1992 an "annus horribilis" after scandals beset her children's rocky marriages and fire swept through Windsor Castle. Ten years later, death and scandal
stripped the gilt off her Golden Jubilee celebrations.
But the monarch, praised in the poll by an overwhelming majority as a hardworking ambassador for Britain, shows no sign of stepping down.
British Royals
Formerly 'The Vidiot'
Seeking 'Harry Potter'
20th World Scout Jamboree
Instead of learning how to tie knots and save drowning swimmers, some of the more than 17,000 boy and girl scouts at the 20th World Scout Jamboree have
set out on a frenzied search for Harry Potter, or at least the actor who plays the little wizard.
But has Daniel Radcliffe, the young bespectacled Briton who portrays Potter in two films, actually materialized on the beaches of southeastern Thailand?
The Bangkok Post said security officials are keeping his whereabouts a top secret but that some lucky scouts have already bagged autographs from Radcliffe.
However, The Nation said that there were a number of Harry look-alikes, including one Belgian who was besieged for autographs, but that the star was definitely not there.
20th World Scout Jamboree
Bocaue
Fireworks
A Filipino worker inspects rockets for sale in Bocaue, a town in the province of Bulacan about 25 km (16 miles) north of central Manila, December 29, 2002. Many Filipinos flocked to Bulacan,
a major producer of fireworks, to buy pyrotechnics despite the government's campaign against the use of such explosives, which cause deaths and injuries during new year revelries.
Photo by Romeo Ranoco
Providing A Service
Radio
In the days following the arrests of hundreds of Middle Eastern men who voluntarily registered with the INS, a small Persian-language radio station became a powerful
gathering place for the immigrant community, taking calls from those being detained and spearheading a rally that attracted thousands of protesters.
KIRN-AM canceled its programming to provide round-the-clock coverage of the detentions of nearly 400 Middle Eastern men after they reported to the Immigration and
Naturalization Service on Dec. 16. Anyone who had problems with their immigration documents were taken into custody.
Under the National Security Entry-Exit Registration System, men 16 and older from countries considered high risk for terrorists were ordered to
appear at INS offices to be photographed and fingerprinted.
Those from Iran, Iraq, Libya, Sudan and Syria were ordered to register by Dec. 16. Temporary visitors from 13 other countries, including Afghanistan,
Algeria, Lebanon and North Korea, are required to register by Jan. 10, while men from Saudi Arabia and Pakistan must register by Feb. 21.
After the 1979 revolution, the largest population of Iranian emigrants in the world settled in Southern California. Although census figures estimate
slightly more than 101,000 people are of Iranian ancestry, community leaders insist the number is closer to 600,000.
Radio
Restoration In Progress
Point Reyes Lighthouse
At the very tip of the Point Reyes Headlands north of San Francisco, rolling green hills turn to sheer cliffs when they meet the Pacific Ocean.
Today, an automated electric light and fog horn warn mariners of the rocky shore, but the original Point Reyes Lighthouse remains as a testament to California's maritime past.
Years of wind, fog and harsh sea air have left the structure in need of repairs, so the 132-year-old lighthouse is being restored as part of a $1.2 million project by the National Park Service.
Crews are rushing to fix the 300 narrow concrete steps - the only way down the cliff to the oceanside beacon - paint the lighthouse and complete other repairs before next month
when tourists will flock to the peninsula to see migrating gray whales.
The lighthouse was built in 1870 to keep sailors from crashing into the rocky shore as they navigated into and out of San Francisco Bay, 35 miles to the southeast. It was decommissioned
by the Coast Guard in 1975, and is now maintained by the National Park Service as a historic site.
On calm days, visitors can go inside the lighthouse, which still has its original 19th century lens and clockwork mechanism that focused and turned the light beam. Spring through fall,
rangers operate the lighthouse for show twice a month.
Point Reyes Lighthouse Restoration
Point Reyes Nat'l Seashore
Pt. Reyes Lighthouse
Two geese are preparing to fight in a gypsy suburb of Skopje, December 29, 2002. Several times a year Gypsies organize a traditional goose fight. The owner
of the winning goose gets cash prize and a prestigious title.
Photo by Ognen Teofilovski
'The Osbournes'
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