Special Bonus Disinfotainment Today
'My Candidate'
By Michael Dare
DETAINED BY U.S. SECRET SERVICE,
DEMANDS CONGRESSIONAL INQUIRY
INTO 'CONSPIRACY OF HARASSMENT'
'Best of TBH Politoons'
Thanks, again, Tim!
Quick Review For This Week
'Black Adder'
This week is the episode "Witchsmeller Persuivant"
The king is a little
under the weather with the black plauge and Harry is running the country.
Well, Edmund has a cunning plan. Get Harry burned at the stake as a witch
and he can take over.
So begins a witchhunt that John Ashcroft could take
lessons from. Unfortunately, the witch smeller decides that it's Edmund who
is the real witch. Edmund and his buddies are sentenced to be burned at the
stake.
How will the boys escape? Is there a real witch? Will the king
recover from the black death?
Turn on the BBC Friday at 8:40 EST to find out.
Thanks, Mr. Hawk!
from Mark
Another Bumpersticker
Selected Readings
from that Mad Cat, JD
In The Chaos Household
Last Night
Another day so nice I remember why I moved here.
Dave Letterman had a great package of chimpy mispronouncing 'nuclear.'
Conan in Canada has been brilliant. Best late night TV I've seen in a l-o-n-g time! Should re-run on NBC late, late night next week (around 3am-ish/est).
The kid missed another day of school, but I dropped by his classroom to retrieve homework to 'help' fill his evening.
He's been happier with me...
Tonight, Friday, CBS starts the night with a FRESH 'Joan Of Arcadia' (where Amber Tamblyn's Dad, the always-fabulous Russ Tamblyn guests), followed by a FRESH 'JAG', then
a FRESH 'The Handler'.
Scheduled on a FRESH Dave are Alec Baldwin, Sofia Coppola, and Kylie Minogue.
Scheduled on a FRESH Craiggers are Ted Danson, Mary Steenburgen, Krista Allen, and Simply Red.
NBC begins the night with a 2-hour 'Dateline', followed by a FRESH 'Third Watch'.
Scheduled on a FRESH Jay are Diane Keaton, Sen. John Edwards, and Starsailor.
Scheduled on a FRESH Conan are Jim Carrey, Eric McCormack, and Barenaked Ladies.
Scheduled on a FRESH Carson Daly are Cedric the Entertainer, Al Roker, Chris Noth, Death Cab For Cutie, Mike Birbiglia, and Billonaire Boys Club.
ABC opens the night with a FRESH 'George Lopez', followed by a FRESH 'Married To The Kellys', then a FRESH 'Hope & Faith', followed by a
FRESH 'Bonnie', then '20/20'.
Scheduled on a FRESH Jimmy Kimmel is Henry Winkler, with this week's guest co-host Warren Sapp.
The WB offers a FRESH 'Reba', followed by a FRESH 'What I Like About You', then a FRESH 'Grounded For Life', followed by a FRESH
'Like Family'.
Faux has the FRESH 'Great American Celebrity Spelling Bee', followed by 'National Geographic Channel Presents: When Animals Attract'.
UPN fills the night with the movie 'Shaft' (Samuel L. Jackson version).
PLEASE check local PBS listings for the best program on over-the-air-TV, 'NOW With Bill Moyers'.
A&E has 'American Justice', followed by the movie 'The Hard Way', then 'Airline'.
AMC offers the movie 'The Longest Day', followed by the movie 'Cop Land', then the movie 'They Live'.
BBC -
[6pm] 'BBC World News';
[6:30pm] 'Cash in the Attic' - Doyle;
[7pm] 'House Invaders' - Harrow;
[7:30pm] 'Changing Rooms' - West Hampstead;
[8pm] 'The Thin Blue Line' - Night Shift;
[8:40pm] 'Blackadder' - Witchsmeller Pursuivant;
[9:20pm] 'The Office' - Episode 5;
[10pm] 'At Home With The Braithwaites' - Episode 4;
[11pm] 'So Graham Norton' - Pamela Anderson;
[11:30pm] 'So Graham Norton' - Heidi Klum;
[12am] 'The Thin Blue Line' - Night Shift;
[12:40am] 'Blackadder' - Witchsmeller Pursuivant;
[1:20am] 'The Office' - Episode 5;
[2am] 'At Home With The Braithwaites' - Episode 4;
[3am] 'The Thin Blue Line' - Night Shift;
[3:40am] 'Blackadder' - Witchsmeller Pursuivant;
[4:20am] 'The Office' - Episode 5;
[5am] 'At Home With The Braithwaites' - Episode 4; and
[6am] 'BBC World News'. (ALL TIMES EST)
Bravo has 'Inside The Actors Studio' (Samuel L. Jackson), followed by the mvoie 'The Onion Field', then the movie 'Mulholland Falls'.
Comedy Central has 'MAD TV', 'Comedy Central Presents' (Bruce Bruce), 'Wanda Sykes: Tongue Untied', 'Comedy Central Presents', and another 'Comedy Central Presents'.
History has 'Modern Marvels', 'Save Our History', 'Greatest Raids', and 'Modern Marvels'.
SciFi has 'Tremors: The Series', another 'Tremors: The Series', 'Stargate SG-1', and 'Code Name: Eternity'.
TCM - Day 13 of '31 Days of Oscar™', where every movie is either an Oscar™ winner or nominee.
And in the immortal words of Elwood P. Dowd: "Years ago my mother used to say to me, she'd say, "In this world, Elwood, you must be" -- she always called me Elwood -- "In this world, you must be oh so smart or oh so pleasant." Well, for years I was smart. I recommend pleasant. And you may quote me."
[6am] 'Anthony Adverse' (1936);
[8:30am] 'The V.I.P.s' (1963);
[11am] 'The Bad and the Beautiful' (1952);
[1:30pm] 'The Great Lie' (1941);
[3:30pm] 'Elmer Gantry' (1960);
[6pm] 'A Patch Of Blue' (1965);
[8pm] 'Harvey' (1950);
[10pm] 'Bonnie and Clyde' (1967);
[12am] 'National Velvet' (1944);
[2:15am] 'The Year of Living Dangerously' (1982);
[4:15am] 'Separate Tables' (1958). (ALL TIMES EST)
Joanne Corazo dusts off a red piano at the Elton John shop at Caesars Palace in Las Vegas, Thursday, Feb. 12, 2004. John's new show, 'The Red Piano,' opens Friday evening at the Colosseum theater in the hotel. John will play 75 shows in the next three years, using the space while Celine Dion takes time off.
Photo by Joe Cavaretta
The Information One-Stop
Moose & Squirrel
MAC Cosmetics
Christina Aguilera & Missy Elliott
MAC cosmetics has introduced five new representatives — including Christina Aguilera and Missy Elliott — for Viva Glam products that will benefit the MAC AIDS Fund.
All proceeds from Viva Glam V Lipstick and Lipglass will go to the fund, which provides money to organizations that provide care and daily essentials to those afflicted with HIV/AIDS and that offer education, awareness and prevention programs.
Aguilera, Elliott, supermodel Linda Evangelista, Chloe Sevigny and Boy George were introduced at a press conference Wednesday. MAC President John Demsey said they were asked to join the project because they represent the many faces of AIDS patients — "all ages, all races, all sexes."
Over the past 10 years, MAC has raised more than $32 million through the sales of the Viva Glam lipstick collection. Previous spokesmen include Elton John and Mary J. Blige.
Christina Aguilera & Missy Elliott
www.macaidsfund.org
Nobel Laureate With An Opinion
Jose Saramago
Nobel Prize winner Jose Saramago said U.S. resident George W. Bush is an "imbecile" for leading the war against Iraq.
The Portuguese novelist, who won the Nobel literature prize in 1998, on Wednesday called the war "stupid, obscene" and said it was "directed by that imbecile named Bush." He added that the White House was more interested in finding water on the planet Mars than fighting poverty. "It is obscene that (someone) could die of hunger," Saramago said.
Saramago was in Mexico City receiving the Isidro Fabela medal from the National Autonomous University's law school.
Jose Saramago
Children's book author and illustrator Maurice Sendak, points to young fan, Marcus Gabrielli, 3, as he signs autographs at an event where he was given a lifetime achievement award from Child Magazine, Thursday, Feb. 12, 2004, in New York.
Photo by Mike Appleton)
Reprises Dash to Church for Ad
Dustin Hoffman
Dustin Hoffman reprised his rush to the church in 1967's "The Graduate" for a car commercial in which he stops his daughter's wedding.
The ad being filmed in an east Los Angeles County city (La Verne) is only the second commercial the 66-year-old Hoffman has appeared in, he said Wednesday. It will air in Europe only.
In the final scenes of "The Graduate," Hoffman's breakthrough film, his character, Benjamin Braddock, pulls Katharine Ross' character, Elaine Robinson, from the church as she's getting married. They fight off parents and guests before riding away in a bus.
In the car commercial, directed by Michael Bay ("Pearl Harbor"), Hoffman again rescues the bride, but this time returns to a 2005 Audi.
Dustin Hoffman
Calls The Big Lie A Big Lie
Jane Fonda
Actress Jane Fonda hit back at conservatives who released a blurry 1970 picture of her and Democratic presidential candidate John Kerry at an anti-Vietnam war rally, accusing them of trying to undermine Kerry's patriotism.
"The American people have had it with the big lie," Fonda, who called Kerry a Vietnam war hero, told CNN. "Any attempts to link Kerry to me and make him look bad, with that connection, is completely false."
The conservative Internet site NewsMax.com published the picture Monday and The Washington (Moonie) Times ran it prominently on its front page Wednesday with the headline: "Photo of Kerry with Fonda enrages Vietnam veterans."
"How can you impugn, how can you even suggest that a Vietnam veteran like Kerry ... (is not) patriotic? He was a hero there," Fonda said.
"And this is the kind of big lie that's coming out of this current administration that I think the American people are sick of. And I don't think it's going to work," Fonda said.
Jane Fonda
Harvard Hasty Pudding Award
Sandra Bullock
Actress Sandra Bullock had to show off her dating skills Thursday to earn a shiny, brass pudding pot and the title of Harvard's Hasty Pudding Woman of the Year.
Bullock, who has acted with some of Hollywood's most charming leading men, sauntered across the stage, and playing with her golden brown hair, tried to woo a Harvard student wearing a costume with bulging padded biceps and leather pants.
The awards are given to performers who have made a "lasting and impressive contribution to the world of entertainment" by Hasty Pudding Theatricals, the nation's oldest undergraduate drama troupe.
Sandra Bullock
In The Kitchen With BartCop & Friends
Radiohead, Kings of Leon Shine
NME Awards
Melancholic rock band Radiohead and U.S. rockers Kings of Leon took top honors at Thursday's NME music awards, winning two gongs each, while organizers bestowed "Godlike" status on Ozzy Osbourne.
Radiohead, who were nominated in five categories, took the highly prized Best Album award with "Hail To The Thief" while the band's "There There" single was named Best Video.
Tennessee rock band Kings of Leon scooped the much coveted Best New Band and Best International Band awards after gaining glowing reviews for their album "Youth And Young Manhood."
The Best Single Award went to U.S. rock duo The White Stripes for "7 Nation Army," while the Libertines beat off Coldplay, The Darkness, Muse and Radiohead to be named Best UK Band.
Queens Of The Stone Age won Best Live Band while Kelly Osbourne picked up a "Godlike Genius" award for her father, the heavy metal rocker Ozzy who was too ill to make the ceremony after his serious quad bike accident last December.
NME Awards
Lauren Bush, left, daughter of Neil 'Silverado' Bush, and Barbara Bush, center, daughter resident Bush, wait for the start of the Zac Posen Fall 2004 fashion show, Thursday, Feb. 12, 2004, at Bryant Park in New York. At right is actor Joaquin Phoenix
Photo by Kathy Willens
Headed Back Out on the Road
Cher
Cher is not ready to stop touring just yet. The artist, whose 2003 Farewell shows earned the third-best grosses of the year, will embark on a European trek May 8.
Marshall Arts, the company behind Paul McCartney's recent U.K. tour, will produce the shows, which wrap July 3. Tickets are expected to go on sale soon for shows in Ireland, England, Germany, Denmark, France, Switzerland and Austria.
There is also word that Clear Channel Entertainment, which produced her $76.3 million-grossing U.S. dates last year, is working on bringing Cher back to the States for a 2004 run.
Cher
The Next Rick Dees
Ryan Seacrest
Ryan Seacrest will soon take over the popular local morning radio program that disc jockey Rick Dees hosted for more than two decades.
Seacrest, who hosts Fox's "American Idol" and replaced Casey Kasem on the syndicated "American Top 40" radio countdown, will host the daily KIIS-FM show from the same Hollywood studio he uses for his new syndicated live TV talk show, "On-Air with Ryan Seacrest."
The KIIS show also will be called "On-Air with Ryan Seacrest," station owner Clear Channel Communications said Wednesday.
Ryan Seacrest
Baby News
Erykah Badu
Singer Erykah Badu, who is currently touring with Floetry, is expecting again, according to New York's WQHT. The station reported that Badu was expecting her second child and that the father-to-be was none other than The D.O.C.
Badu already has a 6-year-old son, Seven, by Andre 3000 of OutKast. The singer has also been romantically linked to Common in the past.
Erykah Badu
Formerly 'The Vidiot'
Defends Behavior on Stern
Courtney Love
Courtney Love took to the airwaves on the nationally syndicated "Howard Stern Show" this morning Thursday to defend her spate of erratic behavior, the latest example of which was failing to show up for two court hearings the day before in Los Angeles. A bench warrant was issued for her arrest on a felony drug possession charge.
"I didn't show up for court because I didn't have a professional bodyguard," Love told Stern. That echoes the "security concerns" her attorney offered as an explanation to Beverly Hills, Calif., Superior Court Judge Elden Fox, who agreed to hold the arrest order until Tuesday.
In an unscheduled rambling, expletive-laden phone conversation with Stern, Love addressed the charges against her. "I didn't throw any rocks at the window," she said. "I kicked in the door because I didn't have a key. That's the god's truth."
Commenting on charges she faces for possessing the prescription painkillers oxycodone and hydrocodone, she said, "Oxycontin is Percocet without the aspirin in it. I've shattered my hip twice. I certainly do take it under a doctor's guidance. I have serious pain sometimes and it hurts. Let's let the doctors decide."
"My daughter is depressed beyond belief," she said. "Because you know what? She likes me. It is kind of hard when your grandmother goes after your money."
Courtney Love
A model holds an antique compact designed by Spanish surrealist artist Salvador Dali during a press preview for a 'World Antique Compact Exhibition' organised by Japanese cosmetic company Kanebo, in Hong Kong, Thursday, Feb. 12, 2004. The gold and silver plated copper compact 'Bird in Hand,' which is made to contain both lipstick and face powder was created in 1952 and is estimated at Hong Kong $200,000 or US $ 25,800.
Photo by Anat Givon
China Drops Curtain Again
'Vagina Monologues'
The Chinese capital has canceled a production of the controversial women's rights play "The Vagina Monologues" just days after the show was called off in cosmopolitan Shanghai, the play's producers said on Thursday.
Confusion over approvals needed and misunderstandings over the aim of sponsors to spread awareness of violence against women in China, rather than to promote sexual permissiveness, led culture authorities to axe it, the head of the gallery staging it said.
The word "vagina" is repeated more than 100 times in the monologues. The slang word for vagina is considered so offensive in China it is usually written as an "X" in print media.
'Vagina Monologues'
In Original Setting
'Carmen'
Take a world-famous opera whose central character is the sensual gypsy girl Carmen. Place her in the squares and bullring of the southern Spanish city that inspired her tragic tale. Add $28.5 million worth of artists and effects, and offer to an international audience.
This is the recipe for the First Seville International Music Festival, which will begin next September. Organizers hope it will attract some 50,000 lovers of music, spectacle and Spain.
Acts one and two of Carmen will be staged on the Plaza de Espana, near the tobacco factory whose female workers inspired Carmen's famed femme fatale.
Act three will take place a five-minute stroll away, in Maria Luisa Park, which will be transformed into a mountain forest for the occasion.
The final act — performed in Seville's bullring after a two-hour intermission that will give spectators time to dine along the Guadalquivir River before taking carriages to the arena — will bring the opera to its calamitous end.
'Carmen'
Karaoke's Cinematic Offspring
Movieoke
Frustrated actors have a new outlet for their creative urges that until now was only available to their singing cousins -- Movieoke, Karaoke's cinematic sibling.
The brainchild of film-fanatic Anastasia Fite, Movieoke is just what it sounds like: a chance for those brave enough to take over from Robert De Niro in his "You talkin' to me?" monologue in "Taxi Driver," or to strut their stuff alongside Ben Stiller in "Zoolander."
Guests select a specific scene from a movie that is then projected onto a big screen, while a monitor in front of them shows the scene along with subtitled dialogue.
The result is either a skillful rendering of the original lines or, more often than not, some sort of goof up that draws laughter from the audience.
Movieoke
NBC to Debut Secret Audio & Videotapes
Princess Diana
More than six years after her death, audio and videotapes Princess Diana secretly recorded during her ill-fated marriage to Prince Charles will get their first public airing next month on NBC, the network said on Thursday.
NBC said it would present excerpts of the audio tapes, the principal source for Andrew Morton's 1992 international bestseller "Diana: Her True Story," and separate video footage taken of her during the same period, in a special two-part broadcast set for March 4 and March 11.
The two-hour documentary, titled "Princess Diana: The Secret Tapes," also will feature interviews with some of Diana's closest friends and confidants, NBC said.
Princess Diana
Basic Cable Networks
Rankings
Rankings for the top 15 programs on basic cable networks as compiled by Nielsen Media Research for the week of Feb. 2-8. Each ratings point represents 1,084,000 households. Day and start time (EST) are in parentheses.
1. AFC/NFC Pro Bowl (Sunday, 7:28 p.m.), ESPN, 3.9, 4.24 million homes.
2. "Budweiser Shootout" (Saturday, 8 p.m.), TNT, 3.6, 3.89 million homes.
3. "Monk" (Friday, 10 p.m.), USA, 3.3, 3.56 million homes.
4. "Real World XIV" (Tuesday, 10 p.m.), MTV, 3.2, 3.45 million homes.
5. "Fairly Odd Parents" (Sunday, 10 a.m.), Nickelodeon, 3.1, 3.4 million homes.
6. "WWE Raw Zone" (Monday, 10 p.m.), Spike, 3.0, 3.24 million homes.
7. "WWE Raw" (Monday, 9 p.m.), Spike, 3.0, 3.23 million homes.
8. "SpongeBob SquarePants" (Sunday, 9:30 a.m.), Nickelodeon, 2.9, 3.17 million homes.
9. "SpongeBob SquarePants" (Saturday, 9:30 a.m.), Nickelodeon, 2.9, 3.12 million homes.
10. "Newlyweds: Nick & Jessica" (Wednesday, 10 p.m.), MTV, 2.7, 2.95 million homes.
11. "Fairly Odd Parents" (Saturday, 10 a.m.), Nickelodeon, 2.7, 2.9 million homes.
12. "Fairly Odd Parents" (Sunday, 10:30 a.m.), Nickelodeon, 2.6, 2.85 million homes.
13. "Law & Order: SVU" (Wednesday, 9 p.m.), USA, 2.6, 2.84 million homes.
14. "Law & Order" (Monday, 9 p.m.), TNT, 2.6, 2.81 million homes.
15. "SpongeBob SquarePants" (Saturday, 9 a.m.), Nickelodeon, 2.6, 2.8 million homes.
Rankings
The Lactoria cornuta, or cow fish, is seen at the Taipei Sea World, Thursday, Feb. 12, 2004, in Taipei, Taiwan. The Cow Fish is found in the Indo-Pacific, Red Sea and East Africa eastward through Indonesia to Marquesas and northward to southern Japan and Taiwan. When scared it can release a toxic chemical which can kill many surrounding fish, including itself.
Photo by Wally Santana
'The Osbournes'
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