'TBH Politoons'
Thanks, again, Tim!
Weekly Review
HARPER'S WEEKLY REVIEW
August 27, 2002
After reviewing the devastation caused by the biggest wildfire in Oregon's
history, President George W. Bush announced his plan to protect 190
million acres of national forest land by allowing more logging to do away
with flammable old trees and by protecting the timber industry from
environmentalists' lawsuits that could delay such logging. "There is a
fine balance between people expressing themselves and using litigation to
keep the United States . . . from enacting a common-sense forest policy,"
he noted.
Pakistani president Pervez Musharraf rewrote his country's
constitution, creating 29 amendments that allow him to dissolve the
elected parliament, to appoint military leaders and supreme-court
justices, and to give military officials political power. Musharraf, who
came to power after a coup in 1999 and who declared himself president last
year, also extended his term in office. "Obviously, to the extent that,
you know, our friends promote democracy, that's important," President Bush
responded, and assured the American public that Musharraf is "still tight
with us in the war against terror, and that's what I appreciate."
Lawyers for President Bush determined that he can launch an attack on Iraq without
approval from Congress, since the permission his father received in 1991
to engage in the Persian Gulf War remains in effect.
Saudi investors
withdrew between $100 billion and $200 billion from the United States to
protest criticism of the kingdom following September 11; at a Pentagon
briefing two weeks ago, a Rand Corporation analyst called Saudi Arabia the
"kernel of evil."
Plans were under way for a U.S. Army
helicopter to drop a Welsh man's one-ton ball of rubber bands into the
Grand Canyon, to see if it will bounce.
Continued at www.harpers.org/weekly-review
-- Margaret Cordi
from Alex
Walter Cronkite
''I am very upset that the Defense Department and the administration have not
provided the facilities for the American people to know what their troops
are doing in Afghanistan. It's been a total news blackout. We are not
allowed to accompany troops into action, and this is a denial of the free
speech and free press to which we're entitled - particularly when it's a
matter of reporting our boys and girls going into action, endangering their
lives to protect our democracy. We are entitled to know what they're putting
up with and how they are performing."
That's what Walter Cronkite, still the most-trusted man in America, told
this column during a chat about his involvement in the PBS series "Liberty's
Kids." This is an animated program telling the story of the American
Revolution through the eyes of teens working as apprentices in Benjamin
Franklin's workshop. Walter provides the voice of Franklin.
Cronkite told us that if he were back in the saddle, "I would do what I'm
surprised the rest of the press is not doing, I would not let a day go by
without my complaints that we were being denied the right to cover the
story" [in Afghanistan].
For the rest, Walter Cronkite
Can we give Walter Cronkite a TV show?
Alex
Thanks, Alex. I'd put a link to your site, but I can't find it at the moment - sorry
Another Fun Link
from Sharon
Lots of good subversive antiwork stuff -- plus a hypnotic spiral you can
use to distract yourself from your shitty job
Anxiety Culture
'It's Saddam That I Want'
from Alvin
Lawyers Say Bush Doesn't Need OK To Hit Iraq
WhiteHouse lawyers apparently told pResident Bush that the Constitution gives him authority to act independently of Congress & would not need any congressional approval to attack Iraq.
MIDILink
IT'S SADDAM THAT I WANT
{Sung to 'You're TheOne That I Want'
by Olivia Newton-John & John Travolta}
{As Sung By pResident Bush}
{instrumental intro}
I'm so thrilled
It's electrifyin
I don't need Congress' blessings
White House lawyers told me so
You better shape up
'Cause I can wage a war
And my heart is set on you
You better shape up
Don't intend to seek approval
To my heart I must be true
Attack Iraq
Attack Iraq - I've got authority to act
It's Saddam that I want
No-no-no - not bin Laden
It's Saddam that I want
No-no-no - not bin Laden
It's Saddam that I want
Oo-oo-oo - the one I need
Is Saddam Hussein - oh yes indeed
If you refused
UN inspectors
You'll regret your decision
Better take my direction
I better shape up
It's revenge for Dad
I decides what needs to be done
I better shapeup
'Cause I'm gonna prove
My obssession is justified
Attack Iraq
Attack Iraq - I've got authority to act
It's Saddam thatI want
No-no-no - not bin Laden
It's Saddam that I want
No-no-no - not bin Laden
It's Saddam that I want
Oo-oo-oo- the one I need
Is Saddam Hussein - oh yes indeed...
Alvin D
Another Website Bites The Dust
Satire Wire
New Haven, Conn. (SatireWire.com) — Citing creative differences, SatireWire's founder and sole employee, Andrew Marlatt, announced that as of today, the site will no longer be updated.
SatireWire | SATIREWIRE HAS LANDED
In The Chaos Household
Last Night
Not that I'm complaining, but the temperature is running 10 degrees below normal.
One of the nicer features of the neighborhood is the streets are lined with older trees. The city trimmed them today. The kid was entranced. All manner of
equipment and noise. Kind of freaked the cats, though.
Talked to dad in PA. Not the best year for gardening back there.
Jimmy West is celebrating his first 49th birthday.
Tonight, Wednesday, CBS is all fresh - first, 'Big Brother 3', and then 'The 20th Annual Miss Teen USA Pageant'. Last Friday one of the non-female
talents was tipped. Check it out to see Jarret Reid do something amazing!
Scheduled on a fresh Dave are John Travolta and Nelly.
On a rerun Craiggers, the scheduled guests are Mary Steenburgen, Mario Lopez, Guided by Voices.
It's NBC's turn for a 'Trifecta' of reruns - 'Ed', 'The West Wing', and 'Law & Order'.
On a rerun Jay, the scheduled guests are Mike Myers and Jewel.
On a rerun Conan, the scheduled guests are Steve Irwin, Amy Sedaris, and Andrew W.K.
On a rerun Carson Daly (from 5/08/02), the guests are David Spade and MEST.
ABC has an hour-long rerun of 'My Wife & Kids', then 2 reruns of 'Drew Carey', and wraps with a fresh 'ICU: Arkansas Children's Hospital'.
The WB has the movie 'Full Ride'.
Faux has the fresh season finale of '30 Seconds To Fame', followed by a rerun of '30 Seconds To Fame'. Next is a rerun of 'Bernie Mac', and then a fresh 'American Idol: The Search For A Superstar'.
UPN has back-to-back reruns of 'Enterprise'.
TLC has the season premiere of 'Junkyard Wars' at 9pm (edt). (The kid is gonna be so stoked!)
Around suppertime on the east coast (and close to lunchtime on the left coast), TCM celebrates Donald O'Connor's
birthday with
Singin' in the Rain (1952) (first time I saw Donald O'Connor run up the wall in 'Make Them Laugh', was convinced he had broken the laws of gravity,
and was mightily impressed) followed by the overlooked
I Love Melvin (1953), both of which also star
Debbie Reynolds.
Anyone have any opinions?
Or reviews?
(See below for addresses)
Hosting MTV Video Music Awards Thursday
Jimmy Fallon
Jimmy Fallon is known for his impressions of celebrities, from Adam Sandler and Jerry Seinfeld to Alanis Morissette and Dave Matthews. But there's one voice that eludes him.
"I can't do Woody Allen to this day. I worked with him and I can't even do him," Fallon said in a recent interview with The Associated Press. "I just sound like John Travolta when he was really young."
Fallon's debut comedy album "The Bathroom Wall," which contains many of his impressions, hits stores Tuesday. He's also hosting the MTV Video Music Awards Thursday night.
Jimmy Fallon
Big Dog Watch Continues
Bill Clinton
Former President Bill Clinton speaks with Democrat candidate for Arkansas governor Jimmie Lou Fisher, left, at a Democratic Party rally Monday, Aug. 26, 2002, in West Memphis, Ark.
Photo by Danny Johnston
Files Suit Against Band
Peter Noone
Peter Noone, who was "Herman" of Herman's Hermits, filed a federal lawsuit against a musical group that's allegedly performing under the band's name.
The lawsuit filed Monday seeks an injunction blocking drummer Barry Whitwam and several others from performing under the Herman's Hermits name. Whitwam was the band's
original drummer but plays with other musicians using the group's name, the suit said.
The original group sold more than 50 million albums and is known for such tunes as "I'm Into Something Good" and "Mrs. Brown, You've Got A Lovely Daughter."
Peter Noone
University of Calgary
'The Sopranos'
The trials and tribulations of television's favorite dysfunctional crime family, "The Sopranos," are set to be yanked from New Jersey's mean streets and dissected alongside Shakespeare at a Canadian university.
The University of Calgary is offering a course this fall that will examine how the gritty, award-winning HBO series that features mob boss Tony Soprano, his wife Carmela, his gang and his
troubled psychiatrist fit into the gangster film genre.
The course has been booked solid for months.
Students will first view the 1931 gangster classic "The Public Enemy," starring James Cagney, then Francis Ford Coppola's "Godfather" series before studying six episodes of "The
Sopranos" from the first two seasons.
'The Sopranos'
Naples, Italy
Anti-Mafia Museum
Naples, long the chaotic home of the Camorra gangster families, will soon throw open the doors on an anti-Mafia museum to pay homage to Italy's war on crime.
The museum will boast documentary films about the Camorra -- the Mafia organization that operates in and around the southern city of Naples -- police files, weapons and confiscated art, cars and jewels.
The museum's permanent collection will include everything from seized bazookas and machineguns to some of the 330 ancient sculptures, paintings and classic automobiles confiscated
from Pasquale Galasso, the former Camorra godfather.
Naples will not be the first Mafia-plagued city to try and counter the criminal influence with a museum. Corleone, the birth place of the Cosa Nostra's godfathers,
converted a 400-year-old palace into an anti-mob museum in 2000.
Anti-Mafia Museum
Stonewall, Texas
Lady Bird Johnson
Former first lady Lady Bird Johnson, 89, left, greets a park ranger as she arrives for the annual wreath-laying ceremony at the cemetery where her husband was buried after his death in 1973,
in Stonewall, Texas, Tuesday, Aug. 27, 2002. State park officials also celebrated the 94th birthday of former President Lyndon B. Johnson by opening a new exhibit on his life in the Texas Hill Country.
Photo by Eric Gay
Turned Away By Clear Channel
Opie & Anthony
Opie and Anthony got the door slammed in their faces by Clear Channel yesterday, as the radio giant said it had absolutely no interest in hiring the just-fired shock jocks.
One high-ranking radio exec said that with the FCC investigating the possibility of yanking the license of WNEW, owned by Infinity Broadcasting, Opie and Anthony may find it hard to get work.
Meanwhile, WNEW has given the dynamic duo's coveted afternoon drive slot to Ron Pennington and Fez Whatley, whose "Ron and Fez Show" had previously aired in a nightly
time slot now occupied by Infinity's L.A.-based talker Tom Leykis. Until more program changes are announced, WNEW will run four-hour segments called the "Best of Ron and Fez."
Opie & Anthony
Here's A Shocker
Annenberg Public Policy Center
Entertainment and media companies are largely ruled by testosterone, with only a slim percentage of top jobs or corporate board seats going to women.
A study released Tuesday morning in Washington by Pennsylvania University's Annenberg Public Policy Center concludes that women are often "significantly underrepresented"
throughout such firms as Fox Entertainment Group, USA Networks, AOL Time Warner, Walt Disney Co., Metro-Goldwyn-Mayer, General Electric/NBC, Clear Channel and AMC Entertainment.
The Annenberg treatise concluded that the glass ceiling has been fortified by consolidation, since there are fewer and fewer rungs at the top of the ladder.
Across the entertainment, cable, TV news and Internet sectors, men accounted for more than three in four of top executives -- defined as chairmen, vice chairmen, presidents, chief executives or chief operating officers.
Top newspapers fared a bit better than the entertainment and media companies they cover when it comes to female power. An exception was the Washington Post, which had no women on its board in 2001.
Annenberg Public Policy Center
Another Fun One
from Sharon
Why Work
To Dominate UK Heavy Metal Awards
American Bands
American bands are set to dominate heavy-metal's equivalent of the Oscars on Tuesday when British rock magazine Kerrang! hands out its annual awards.
Surrey-based metallists Hundred Reasons are the lone British contender in the main international categories, nominated for Best Album with "Ideas Above Our Station" against four U.S. rivals.
In contention for Best Band are Canadian rock outfits Sum 41 and Nickelback, Californian bands the Red Hot Chili Peppers and Linkin Park, and Iowan shock rockers Slipknot -- winners for the past two years.
Best Album pitches Hundred Reasons against Puddle of Mudd's "Come Clean," Sum 41's "All Killer No Filler," Nickelback's "Silver Side Up," and "Toxicity" from American-Armenian quartet System of a Down.
American Bands
Papers Sell for $80,000
Carl Sandburg
An extensive and previously unknown collection of documents from author and poet Carl Sandburg sold for more than $80,000 on Monday night, auction house officials said.
The various documents, which included letters, drawings and handwritten manuscripts, were sold to about 50 different buyers — museums, universities, historical societies and private
collectors, said officials at Tom Hall Auctions in Schnecksville, Pa., 60 miles north of Philadelphia.
The collection, which may shed new light on Sandburg, known for immortalizing Chicago as the "city of the big shoulders," was almost never found. A Pennsylvania antiques dealer, Walt
Brygier, stumbled upon it last year while disposing of boxes for a client. One fell apart, spilling the documents.
Sandburg, who died in 1967 at age 1967, won two Pulitzer Prizes — one for a biography of Abraham Lincoln — wrote movie scripts and poems, was a Chicago journalist for
years, and even toyed with the idea of running for president in 1940. The collection includes a dictated letter about the possible run against Franklin Roosevelt, signed by Sandburg.
The collection includes manuscripts with handwritten revisions, correspondence with the late Illinois governor and presidential candidate Adlai Stevenson, and 12 photos
of Sandburg's 75th birthday party, taken by his brother-in-law, photographer Edward Steichen.
Carl Sandburg
In The Kitchen With BartCop & Friends
Created Fashion Stir
Serena Williams
World number one Serena Williams created a fashion stir during her 6-2, 6-3 first-round win over fellow American Corina Morariu at the U.S. Open on Monday.
Stepping out onto the Arthur Ashe court in a short-legged, all-in-one, black leather-look, skin-tight outfit with pink wristbands and a diamond tiara, the younger Williams exposed her personality
and whole lot more to the large opening day crowd.
Serena acknowledged that her outfit would not be to everyone's taste.
"This is a cat suit, it's made of Lycra and it's supposed to have the illusion of looking a little bit like leather from a distance," said Serena. "It sticks to the body, it really sticks to what type of shape you have.
"If you don't have a decent shape this isn't the best outfit to have."
Serena Williams
Set to Beat Auction Record
Hendrix-Zappa Guitar
A charred guitar set alight on stage by rock legend Jimi Hendrix could become the most expensive guitar ever sold when it goes under the hammer in London next month, auctioneers said on Tuesday.
The 1963 Fender Stratocaster is being offered for sale by the son of rock guitarist Frank Zappa.
One of Hendrix's roadies had given it to Zappa, who used it on his own 1976 album "Zoot Allures" after making it again playable. His son Dweezil became owner of the instrument upon his father's death.
Frank and Dweezil Zappa had restored the guitar, putting a new neck and electrical gear on the body of the instrument, which still bears the scars of flames
from one of Hendrix's flamboyant stage shows.
Hendrix-Zappa Guitar
Baby News
Jerry & Jessica Seinfeld
Jerry and Jessica Seinfeld aren't wasting any time. She's already expecting their second child, due to arrive at the end of February. They are already the proud parents of daughter Sascha, who was born Nov. 8, 2000. Jessica was given so many strollers, bassinets and other paraphernalia she didn't know what to do with that she founded Baby Buggy, which recycles baby gear to needy moms. "She's excited," said a friend. No word on whether it will be a boy or a girl.
Jerry & Jessica Seinfeld
Recovering From Accident
Margot Kidder
Margot Kidder is recuperating from a broken pelvis she suffered in a weekend highway accident.
The 53-year-old actress, who played Lois Lane in the "Superman" movies of the late 1970s and early '80s, was injured Sunday when her GMC Yukon hit a raised pavement and rolled over several times.
Kidder, who lives in Livingston, Mont., had been in Belfast to host the 15-Minute Festival, a series of original plays staged at the National Theatre Workshop of the Handicapped.
She was on her way to Montreal when the accident happened.
Margot Kidder
'Boot Camp' Special
'Celebs'
Celebs including rapper Coolio and former pop idol Tiffany have signed on to participate in the two-hour Fox special "Celebrity Boot Camp," which will air Sept. 30.
Two former Marine Corps drill instructors will shuffle the celebs through various missions; they'll then rank the strongest players and eliminate the four weakest.
Elimination continues until just two celebs are still standing.
Others on board include house guest Kato Kaelin; "Married...With Children's" David Faustino; surviving ex-Milli Vanilli member Fabrice Morvan; "Baywatch" babe Traci
Bingham; singer Vitamin C; "Renegade" star Lorenzo Lamas; "Brady Bunch" star Barry Williams; and "Price Is Right" spokesmodel Nikki Schieler Ziering.
'Celebs'
ABC Greenlights Prequel
'Romy and Michele'
ABC has greenlit a two-hour TV movie prequel to the 1997 feature film "Romy and Michele's High School Reunion."
The project, tentatively "Romy and Michele: Behind the Velvet Rope," takes place in the early 1990s, before the events depicted in the feature, which starred Mira Sorvino
and Lisa Kudrow. The TV movie follows the best friends as they head to Hollywood after graduating from high school.
'Romy and Michele'
BartCop TV!
Man With An Opinion
Leif Garrett
Leif Garrett doesn't understand the appeal of Anna Nicole Smith's new reality show.
"The Anna Nicole Show" on E! Entertainment Television, which follows the former Playboy playmate's wacky exploits, drew high ratings when it debuted this month. But
Garrett says he can't watch it for more than a few minutes.
The 40-year-old's own life has been on display in an episode of VH1's "Behind the Music," which examined his battle with drugs and a car accident that left a friend paralyzed.
Garrett wishes the show had focused more on his music than his struggles, but he knows that's not what intrigues people.
Leif Garrett
Format Bites The Dust
Betamax
What VHS couldn't do, digital did. Sony Corp's Betamax video tape recorder, which famously lost the 1980s video format war but held on for decades as a niche product, will finally be laid to rest
after digital formats delivered a death blow to its prospects.
Sony said on Tuesday it would only make 2,000 more Betamax machines before discontinuing the product altogether, ending its 27-year history -- spent mostly in the shadow of the Matsushita group's rival VHS format.
Betamax -- held up as an example of how the first to market is not guaranteed commercial success -- had already been pulled from overseas markets in the 1990s, a Sony spokesman said.
Sony said it would continue to offer repairs and manufacture tapes for the format, adding the move would not affect its Betacam products for the broadcasting industry.
Betamax
Tirana, Albania
Minerva
A 2,000-year-old marble statue, believed to depict Minerva, the goddess of wisdom, stands at the Butrinti archeological site, 300km (180 miles) south of Tirana, Tuesday, Aug. 27, 2002. The statue, discovered by Albanian
archaelogists, is 2.16 meters (7.09 feet) tall and 0.65 (2.13 feet) wide.
Photo by Hektor Pustina
'The Nightmare Of Edgar Allan Poe'
Michael Jackson
Just when you thought Wacko Jacko couldn't get any weirder, the bizarre superstar has agreed to play Edgar Allan Poe in a new movie and will be coached for the role by Marlon Brando.
Gary Pudney, a longtime pal of Michael Jackson, told "Access Hollywood" the self-proclaimed "King of Pop" is moving full speed ahead with a movie about the famed author of "The Raven" and other classic horror tales.
The project - called "The Nightmare of Edgar Allan Poe" - is the story of the writer's final days. Jackson wants to star as Poe himself.
Michael Jackson
T-Shirts Now Available
'Free Martha'
It all started with Willy. Winona followed. Now Martha Stewart is setting a new fashion trend among freedom lovers to show their support to the queen of better living: the "Free Martha" T-shirt.
"I do believe ... she is part of the monarchy that we really need in this country," said Billy Tsangares, a.k.a Billy T, the designer of a line of Stewart T-shirts and owner of the "Y-Que" (Spanish for "So What")
store in Los Angeles.
Tsangares also masterminded the "Free Winona" T-shirt, which became a cult item after actress Winona Ryder was arrested for allegedly shoplifting from a Saks Fifth Avenue store in December last year.
Currently, the most sought-after item is a white T-shirt with a picture of a smiling Stewart behind the bars. But there is also a red one that reads "Insider Trading, It's a bad thing,"
a pun on Stewart's motto, "It's a good thing."
'Free Martha'
Dropped For Bubba The Love Sponge
Dee Snider
Dee Snider may still want to rock. But Hartford's modern rock radio station won't let him.
That much was clear Monday, as nervous WMRQ-FM (104.1) staff members huddled throughout the afternoon to consider their collective fate and the station's switchboard lit up
with calls from confused and angry listeners - some even threatening to blow up the station's Columbus Street building.
Just before 5, the staff gathered in a conference room. There would be a change in the morning show, they heard, but the modern rock music format would stay the same.
With a handful of f-words and blush-inducing sexual innuendoes, Bubba the Love Sponge, a syndicated personality who broadcasts from Florida, announced himself as the city's newest morning radio host. He starts a week from today at 6 a.m.
Before Opie & Anthony surpassed him by persuading a Virginia couple to have sex in Manhattan's St. Patrick's Cathedral, Bubba was the author of perhaps the crudest radio stunt on
record: Last year, from the parking lot of his Tampa studio, he broadcast the slaughter of a pig.
Dee Snider
'Sensitivity'
A Rerun & A Concert (with Pickles)
The CBS television network said on Tuesday that Nextel Communications Inc. will underwrite one of its shows on the anniversary of the Sept. 11 attacks, one of only a handful of such sponsorships for TV shows airing that day.
In a nod to the sensitivity surrounding attack-related programs airing on the anniversary of the death of about 3,000 people in the attacks on the World Trade Center and the Pentagon,
the special, titled "9/11," will have only limited interruptions and no commercial or promotional announcements, CBS said.
The two-hour program was originally broadcast in March and is an insider's account of the World Trade Center attack using footage shot by French filmmakers Gedeon and Jules Naudet,
who were in lower Manhattan shooting a documentary when the first plane flew into the World Trade Center.
In one of the few sponsorship deals previously announced, Boeing Co. last week agreed to underwrite NBC's broadcast of "Concert for America," which is also set to air at 9 p.m. ET on Sept. 11.
That show, produced by NBC in collaboration with the John F. Kennedy Center with first lady Laura Bush as honorary chairman, will showcase a range of musical artists performing in genres from rock and pop to classical.
A Rerun & A Concert (with Pickles)
Unearthed In Cambodia
27 Solid Gold Buddhas
Cambodian workmen have unearthed 27 solid gold Buddha statuettes, buried for hundreds of years beneath the foundations of a ruined pagoda hidden deep in the jungle, officials said on Tuesday.
The statues, about 10 cm (four inches) high and each weighing around 0.5 kg (one lb), came to light at the weekend when builders started restoration work on the centuries-old pagoda
destroyed by the Khmer Rouge in the 1970s.
Four statues made of silver and bronze were also found beneath the sandstone pagoda, which is believed to be at least 200 years old, making the Buddhas even older.
The find is already stirring up controversy between locals who want the statues to be placed in a special shrine inside the restored pagoda and government officials who are intent on putting them in a museum.
Kompong Thom's dense jungle is also littered with dozens of temples built by ancient Khmer civilizations in the sixth and seventh centuries, some 300 years before the massive temple complexes of Angkor Wat in the northwest.
27 Solid Gold Buddhas
Newest Star on Hollywood Walk of Fame
Michael Bolton
Singer Michael Bolton received a star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame on Tuesday while touring to promote his album "Only a Woman Like You."
Bolton, 49, accepted the honor amid a throng of admirers at a ceremony on Hollywood Boulevard, across from the historic Chinese Theater and next to the Roosevelt Hotel.
Bolton, whose star was the 2,203 on the Walk of Fame, is scheduled to perform at several venues in Southern California through the week.
Michael Bolton
Official 2002 Stein
Oktoberfest
Sabine Kaefer, wife of Oktoberfest tent host Michael Kaefer, presents the official 2002 Oktoberfest beer stein in Munich, Tuesday Aug. 27, 2002. Munich's Oktoberfest is the world's biggest
beer festival that runs from Sept. 21 through Oct. 6. Officials expect up to seven million visitors from all over the world to the giant festivity.
Photo by Jan Pitman
'The Osbournes'
'The Osbournes' ~ Page 3
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'The Osbournes' ~ Page 1