To the extent that other people's problems help you forget your own, this has been a good week. I thought my problems were pretty bad until this week happened. Sometimes you need to be reminded, in the most drastic moments, when your own prospects look dim, that things could be worse, a lot worse, and you should be grateful for your pitiful problems. Bad news reminds you that things could be worse, good news reminds you that things could be better, and we need both to remain sane. Despite recent events on the world stage to the contrary, I continue to maintain sanity is a good thing.
How can anyone not want to kill once in a while? After all, who wouldn't want to lay waste to some innocents after finding out you're no smarter than a 5th grader and Howie Mandel won't shake your hand no matter what. I blame it all on emotional trading stamps.
They used to give away S&H Green Stamps with every purchase, one for every dollar spent. You'd fill savings books with the stamps and redeem them for items in a catalogue or at an S&H Redemption Center near you. A new lamp! A new toaster! A bike! All thanks to Green Stamps.
This concept has gone away every way but emotionally. Every time something pisses you off, you put another hate stamp in your emotional savings book. Fill up a book of hate and trade it in on a tantrum. You can take it out on anybody, and they'll think you're over-reacting to the last stamp in the book, little realizing you're simply redeeming a tantrum based on the completion of a whole page of emotion and not just the single stamp.
You can trade in a single page for a little shit fit or save up the pages, like tickets at a carnival arcade, to be traded in for something on the top shelf, a furious fist through a wall or face, or worse, much worse, depending upon how long you've been saving up the hate. Scrooge it up for a week emotionally, then throw down on someone just because they happened to fill in the last stamp, never knowing why you over-reacted. Save up your emotional hate trading stamps for a lifetime and look what happens.
Don't buy into the system. Throw away your emotional trading stamps, never even stick 'em in a book. After all, the glue tastes awful and you'll just redeem it for something stupid. Better to be a little irrational every day than really irrational once a year or totally irrational once a lifetime. Don't bottle up that hate for a rainy day. There is no tomorrow where a bottle of old hate will come in handy.
How about some preventative medicine? Maybe if Cho had had the opportunity to jump into one of these, he'd never have needed the reality...
Sophistimicated Doowacky of the Week
The Virtusphere uses new locomotion technology for
immersing you in a virtual reality where, naturally, you kill people.
I guess it didn't occur to them to create "A Walk Through Paradise."
(Note to self: Create a virtual weight loss program for the Virtusphere
where you have to run through an endless landscape after a
beautiful member of the opposite sex, never quite catching them,
while listening to your favorite MP3s on random.)
I Feel So Much Safer Now
"A University of Colorado student pleaded not guilty Wednesday to making comments that classmates deemed sympathetic toward the gunman blamed for killing 32 students and himself at Virginia Tech, authorities said.
"During a class discussion Tuesday of Monday's massacre at Virginia Tech, Max Karson 'made comments about understanding how someone could kill 32 people,' university police Cmdr. Brad Wiesley said."
"If I made comments about understanding how Max Karson could have made comments about how someone could kill 32 people, would I be breaking the law?"
- certainly not me-
"In order to reflect the hierarchy of faculty, there would have to be stratification:
"Assistant Professors get muzzle-loaders
"Associate Professors get semi-automatics
"Full Professors get automatics
"Adjuncts get a sharp letter-opener
"Chaired Professors are irrelevant, since they never come to campus.
- Hoosier in response to the idea of arming professors in colleges -
"Under the list of countries the State Department recommends Americans to avoid altogether are Israel, Haiti and Colombia. In the case of Colombia, it says that 'citizens of the United States and other countries continue to be victims of threats, kidnappings, and other criminal acts,' even though 'violence in recent years has decreased markedly in most urban areas, including Bogot, Medellin, Barranquilla, and Cartagena.'
"In the case of Israel, it says that there is a continuing threat of suicide bombings. 'The January 2006 and April 2006 suicide bombings in Tel Aviv, the December 2005 suicide bombing in Netanya and a similar incident in Hadera in October 2005 are reminders of the precarious security environment,' it says.
"But it so happens that this week's killings at Virginia Tech were as deadly as the worst recent incidents of violence in Colombia or Israel...
"My opinion: Does it make sense for the United States to warn Americans not to travel to countries whose capitals are as safe - or unsafe - as major U.S. cities?
"Furthermore, does it make sense for the U.S. government to spend billions in economic aid to friendly countries such as Colombia and Israel, and at the same time shoot down their tourism industries?"
"The lizard lounged, the crickets chirped and the tarantulas perched on fuzzy legs at the edges of a turtle-shaped enclosure, oblivious to their role as stars in a battle of artistic freedom versus animal-welfare concerns.
"That was yesterday. As of today, however, the creature's part of an exhibit called Theatre of the World by renowned Chinese artist Huang Yong Ping will be gone, removed after the Vancouver Art Gallery decided it could not comply with additional orders from the British Columbia Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals without compromising the artist's work."
"Operation Broken Bong, maybe? That's the million-dollar question...
"When agents stormed into the West Valley Co-op this time, Joyce says she was not actually in the dispensary, but in a suite next door that houses Natural Care 4 Wellness, a doctor's office that offers medical marijuana recommendations.
"She was there waiting for a ride from Jim Wilson, the business manager of that office, who had just picked up the car-less Joyce from an interview for National Lampoon Radio about The Dope Show.
"Wilson said federal agents entered his office after dispensary patients and staff fled there during the raid.
"'They were kicking doors down when the people who were there were saying, "You don't need to kick that door down, let me give you the key." They were kicking the doors down just because they could, and they had their guns drawn,' recalled Wilson, who prevented agents from seizing medical records because they carried a warrant only for the dispensary, not the separate medical office.
"Before her release, Joyce was forced to give up her address and the name of her parents and roommate, who she fears are now part of some federal database.
"'They asked everyone, "Who knows the safe number?" I'm like, "Are you fucking high?" They're like, "You're lying." We were guilty by association, and I really didn't know,' said Joyce."
"A time will come when the sky is torn apart; when the stars scatter, and the ocean drains away; and when the graves are tossed about, and laid open. At that time every man will be told what he has done, and what he has failed to do; and every woman will be told what she has done, and what she has failed to do."
- Qur'an, Al-Infitar, Surah 82:1-5 -
"It was my fault."
- Maralyn Manson -
Idiot's Guide to the Testimony of Attorney General
Alberto Gonzales before the Senate Judiciary Committee
Gonzales' introductory statement: "I shoulda been more precise... My misstatements were my mistakes, no one else's... I have been extremely forthcoming with information... not the actions of someone with something to hide..."
Responses to Committee Chairman Sen. Leahy (D-VT.): "I can only recall... I don't recall... I did not know... it appears... I was not responsible for... I have no recollection... Again, Senator, I was not responsible for compiling that... I don't recall a specific mention... It appears... as I recall... I don't recall Senator Dominici ever... That rationale was not in my mind, as I recall... Senator, that's an answer that I have to get back to you... Senator, I'd like to give you that information, but..."
Responses to Sen. Specter (R-PA.): "Senator, I don't want to quarrel with you... Based on what I thought, what I understood was going on... I believed that was ongoing... I don't recall... What I recall is... I don't recall whether Mr. Mercer presented me the numbers... Senator, I have no recollection about that, but I presume that that is true... Senator, I do recall having a conversation with Mr. Rove... Senator, you're talking about a series of events that occurred over possibly 700 days... putting it in context, Senator, I would say that my involvement was limited... Senator, of course, in hindsight..."
Reponses to Sen. Kennedy (D-MA.): "I think that's a fair question, Senator... I was not the person in the Department who had the most information... Since then, I have gone back and looked at the documents available to Congress... I'm not aware that anyone... I believe that I had a good process... Senator, I did not review the document... Senator, I think it's a good question... I don't recall in connection to this review process Mr. Sampson was involved in... I don't recall everyone who was there... Senator, there may have been other discussions..."
Responses to Sen. Brownback (R-KS.): "I do not recall what I knew about... I just don't recall the reason... It appears there were concerns about... Now, in hindsight... I'm not aware of any new facts here... She's the other person, quite candidly, Senator, that I don't recall... I myself was confused, quite frankly, when I testified... Generally, I recall..."
Responses to interjection by Chairman Leahy: "Sir, I don't recall sending a follow-up quite frankly. I don't know if it was a mistake or misstatement in my testimony... "
Responses to Sen. Kohl (D-WI.): "Senator, I was never aware... Senator, again, this is a process that was ongoing that I didn't have transparency into... With all due respect Senator... he's the person who has the answers... Senator, I'll go back and see if there is something that I can do... We've done great things!..."
Senator Feinstein (D-CA.): "Senator, I don't recall specifically the genesis of the idea... I don't have any recollection about the mechanics of the legislative process... As I recall, his updates were brief... as Mr. Sampson gave me updates, I don't recall... I accept full responsibility... Senator, I don't recall making the decision that day... I don't recall exactly when I made the decision... Senator, I don't recall knowing whether... Senator, I don't know that..."
"Without a single speech, the Vermont Senate voted 16-9 early Friday morning to support a resolution urging the initiation of impeachment proceedings in Congress against President George W. Bush and Vice President Dick Cheney."
"The administration of THC significantly reduces lung tumor size and lesions, according to preclinical data presented this week at the annual meeting of the American Association for Cancer Research (AACR) in Los Angeles.
"Investigators at Harvard University's Division of Experimental Medicine reported that THC inhibited the growth and spread of cells in vitro from two different lung cancer cell lines and from patient lung tumors. They also reported that THC administration reduced the growth of lung tumors in mice by more than 50 percent compared to untreated controls over a three-week period."
"Here's the part that's got smoke coming out of my ears. The part that makes me so mad I could spit nails. The part that's got me purple with apoplexy.
"The five boy justices on the Supreme Court who voted to take away our reproductive freedom last week were treating us like silly girls who can't be trusted to make our own decisions.
"Worse than silly girls, really. Cows with no more brains than to find the right stall in the dairy barn.
"In his written decision allowing the federal government to criminalize a certain kind of abortion procedure, Justice Anthony Kennedy explained in simple words that even we girls could understand that the court's decision was actually good for us.
"Why? Well, gosh and by golly, because he wanted to protect us from having a procedure that we might not fully understand and would probably come to regret. Well, duh! I surely am grateful to those boy justices for assuming I can't read or follow the words when my doctor 'splains things to me." - Beth Quinn: So girls, did you notice you were raped last week? -
"Mexico City's Legislative Assembly is scheduled to vote today on a measure that would legalize abortion in this city of more than 8 million people. The legislation, which is expected to win approval, could signal the demise of a subculture that profits from the desperation of thousands of women."
April 24, 1982, Disinfotainment Today infiltrated this meeting of the Bilderbergs
Answers to Last Week's Stupid Question
Whom are you plagiarizing?
Robert J. Parker: "Raymond Chandler."
Stephen King: "H.P. Lovecraft."
George W. Bush: "Napoleon Dynamite."
Katy Couric: "Just about anybody."
Galaxy Quest: "The Three Amigos."
Bob Dylan: "Woody Guthrie."
Red River: "Mutiny on the Bounty."
Brian DePalma: "Alfred Hitchcock."
The War in Iraq: "The War in Vietnam."
Another Stupid Question
How do you convince stupid people to do things? Please answer here or here but not here or here.
Not So Holy Moses
"It did not look like much - some ancient buried walls of a military fort and a few pieces of volcanic lava. The archaeologist, Zahi Hawass, often promotes mummies and tombs and pharaonic antiquities that command international attention and high ticket prices.
"But this bleak landscape, broken only by electric pylons, excited him because it provided physical evidence of stories told in hieroglyphics. It was proof of accounts from antiquity.
"That prompted a French reporter to ask about the Exodus, and if the new evidence was linked in any way to the story of Passover. The archaeological remains roughly coincided with the timing of the Israelites' biblical flight from Egypt and the 40 years of wandering the desert in search of the Promised Land.
"'Really, it's a myth,' Hawass said of the story of the Exodus, as he stood at the foot of a wall built during what is called the New Kingdom...
"Egypt is a spiritual center, where for centuries people have searched for the meaning of life. Sometimes the two converge, and sometimes the archaeological record confirms the history of the faithful. Often it does not, however, as Hawass said with detached certainty.
"'If they get upset, I don't care,' Hawass said. 'This is my career as an archaeologist. I should tell them the truth. If the people are upset, that is not my problem.'
"The story of the Exodus is celebrated as the pivotal moment in the creation of the Jewish people. As the Bible tells it, Moses was born the son of a Jewish slave, who cast him into the Nile in a basket so the baby could escape being killed by the pharaoh. He was saved by the pharaoh's daughter and raised in the royal court; then he discovered his Jewish roots and, with divine help, led the Jewish people to freedom. Moses is said to have ascended Mount Sinai, where God appeared in a burning bush and Moses received the Ten Commandments.
"In Egypt today, visitors to Mount Sinai are sometimes shown a bush by tour guides and told it is the actual bush that burned before Moses.
"But archaeologists who have worked here have never turned up evidence to support the account in the Bible, and there is only one archaeological find that even suggests the Jews were ever in Egypt."
"This is why oil is so valuable: one tank of gas from a typical S.U.V. has the energy equivalent of more than 60,000 man-hours of work - roughly 100 men working around the clock for nearly a month. That is the power that the American consumer can access for about $60 at the gasoline pump. If gasoline were a person, we would be paying 10 cents an hour for his labor. Easily accessible reserves are running dry, though, which means that the industry must develop increasingly ingenious - and costly - techniques for getting at the oil. Deepwater drilling, for example, now happens so far offshore that rigs can no longer be anchored to the seabed, they must be held in place by an array of propellers, each the size of a two car garage. The cost of deepwater drilling is close to twice that in shallow water.
"As result, oil is one of the few commodities with virtually no surplus production; just about every drop of oil that gets pumped gets used. The world currently goes through 84 million barrels a day, a figure that is expected to rise to almost 120 million barrels in the next 25 years. As that happens, oil will become more and more expensive to extract. When oil was first exploited, in 1859, the energy equivalent of one barrel of oil was required to pump 50 barrels of oil out of the ground. Now that ratio is one-to-five. Thus far, nearly half of the proven, exploitable oil reserves in the world have been used up. Barring the discovery of new reserves or new drilling technology, some experts predict the world will run out of oil by 2040."
- Sebastian Junger: Blood Oil (Vanity Fair, Feb 2007) -
"A new study by the Pew Research Study shows that viewers of the Daily Show and the Colbert Report have the highest knowledge of national and international affairs, while Fox News viewers rank nearly dead last:
"Despite significant technology shifts, however, Pew found that today's citizens are about as able to name their leaders, and are about as aware of major news events, as was the public nearly 20 years ago.
"The results about Fox News echo findings of previous surveys. In 2003, University of Maryland researchers studied the public's belief in three false claims that Iraq possessed WMD, that Iraq was involved in 9/11, and that there was international support for the U.S.-led invasion of Iraq.
"There are painters who transform the sun into a yellow spot, but there are others who, thanks to their art and intelligence, transform a yellow spot into the sun."
- Pablo Picasso -
"We are entitled to ask - we are required to ask - how many more men, how many more lives, how much more destruction will be asked, to provide the military victory that is always just around the corner, to pour into this bottomless pit of our dreams?" - Bobby Kennedy, March 18, 1968 -
"'All people are born alike - except Republicans and Democrats,' quipped Groucho Marx, and in fact it turns out that personality differences between liberals and conservatives are evident in early childhood. In 1969, Berkeley professors Jack and Jeanne Block embarked on a study of childhood personality, asking nursery school teachers to rate children's temperaments. They weren't even thinking about political orientation.
"Twenty years later, they decided to compare the subjects' childhood personalities with their political preferences as adults. They found arresting patterns. As kids, liberals had developed close relationships with peers and were rated by their teachers as self-reliant, energetic, impulsive, and resilient. People who were conservative at age 23 had been described by their teachers as easily victimized, easily offended, indecisive, fearful, rigid, inhibited, and vulnerable at age 3. The reason for the difference, the Blocks hypothesized, was that insecure kids most needed the reassurance of tradition and authority, and they found it in conservative politics."
"They can't really kick someone out because they're writing papers about weird topics, even if they seem withdrawn and hostile." - Dr. Richard Kadison, chief of mental health services at Harvard University, on a college's limitations in dealing with a disturbed student -
"The FDA is entertaining a 'citizen's petition' to allow manufacturers to substitute vegetable fats and oils for cocoa butter.
"The 'citizens' who created this petition represent groups that would benefit most from this degradation of the current standards. They are the Chocolate Manufacturers Assn., the Grocery Manufacturers Assn., the Snack Food Assn. and the National Cattlemen's Beef Assn. (OK, I'm not sure what's in it for them), along with seven other food producing associations.
"This is what they think of us chocolate eaters, according to their petition on file at the FDA: 'Consumer expectations still define the basic nature of a food. There are, however, no generally held consumer expectations today concerning the precise technical elements by which commonly recognized, standardized foods are produced. Consumers, therefore, are not likely to have formed expectations as to production methods, aging time or specific ingredients used for technical improvements, including manufacturing efficiencies.'
"Let me translate: 'Consumers won't know the difference.'
"I can tell you right now we will notice the difference. How do I know? Because the product they're trying to rename 'chocolate' already exists. It's called 'chocolate flavored' or 'chocolaty' or 'cocoalicious.' You can find it on the shelves right now at your local stores in the 75% Easter sale bin, those waxy/greasy mock-chocolate bunnies and foil-wrapped eggs that sit even in the most sugar-obsessed child's Easter basket well into July."
"Our airwaves, the single most important method by which Americans get information about choosing the future president, are being held hostage by corporate broadcasters.
"As the TV pundits on the networks gab about the tens of millions of dollars raised by the top presidential candidates, what they don't talk about is where that money is going: to their own networks.
"Money is now considered the single most important factor in our electoral process. Ideas and issues take a back seat to the bottom line. This prostitution of our electoral process has one key culprit: television advertising... The citizens are the losers, and the broadcasters and elite political consultants are the winners.
"Some bold members of Congress have tried throughout the decades to end this stranglehold on the political process. Sen. Bill Bradley tried in the 1990s. He said then: 'Today's Senate campaigns function as collection agencies for broadcasters. You simply transfer money from contributors to television stations.'"
"I thought Shirley Temple was terribly potty-mouthed in the classic 1933 movie, 'Salt-Water Tots Meet Captain Cornhole.' Such language from a 7-year old! Just give me the %^&*ing lollypop, you $@#*ing mother-@&%er! or Ill rip you a new #@%"@%! I was appalled. Really."
"10. In your view, does the theory of the unitary executive bar the Justice Department from prosecuting White House officials for contempt of Congress if they refuse to comply with Congressional subpoenas?"
"Score one for common sense. A California Superior Court judge ruled this week that Kaleidescape Inc. did not breach its contract with the DVD Copy Control Association when it manufactured and sold a high-tech system that let consumers copy the DVDs they owned onto a home video jukebox.
"I'm not a lawyer, and I'm not going to do my usual legalistic pantomime on this one. As a principle, I accept that contracts are binding when properly done. On the other hand, you have to wonder whose interests were served by this litigation. Kaleidescape sells extremely high-end gear - at the time of the lawsuit, the entry-level system cost $27,000. Its systems are closed networks with military-grade security, so even if a Kaleidescape owner should rip a copy of a movie he/she rented from Netflix (because, having spent $27,000 on a state-of-the-art video jukebox, the person isn't likely to drop $15 for a copy of "Little Miss Sunshine"?!?), those bits will never leave the building. By contrast, a pirate equipped with a $900 Dell can easily transform an encrypted DVD into an unencrypted file, then burn multiple copies of the movie for friends and offer it online to downloaders around the globe.
"So clearly, this case wasn't about protecting Hollywood against bootleggers. Instead, it seemed to be about stopping Kaleidescape from doing something nifty and compelling that other consumer-electronics companies were either too timid or not clever enough to do." - John Healy: Bit Player - Hollywood's Love/Hate Relationship with Technology -
"The Red Cross sought out less politically inspired views of everyday life in Baghdad. Kraehenbuehl told the Associated Press how one of his Red Cross colleagues polled several Iraqi women, asking them what 'their most pressing need was.'
"After a long silence, one of the women answered with a request that ought to be repeated to every member of Congress and included in every statement they make about Iraq: 'The most important thing that anyone could do is to help collect the bodies that line the streets in front of our homes every morning. No one dares to touch them, but for us it is unbearable to have to expose our children to such images every day as we try to bring them to school.'
"The Bush twins should be volunteering for that duty, along with every chapter of the College OF Young Republicans. Rush Limbaugh could give up drugs to offer his services. Bill O'Reilly, Sean Hannity and Ann Coulter should be packing their bags to join in the mortuary duties."
Disinfotainment Today is starting to regret the whole idea of rewriting the acknowledgment each week. It's getting to be a drag to create the whole damn issue, then get to the bottom and realize there's a whole other section to write. What do you think I am, MADE out words? They've gotta come from somewhere. Every word of this acknowledgment comes from something else I could have said, but didn't, no thanks to this acknowledgment, which never seems to gets around to acknowledging anything anyway. Here's to the work ethic. Nothing gets done unless you do it and unless you do it it won't get done. Who said anything about fair use? Wasn't me.
Thanks,
Alicia Gottlaid
,--^----------,--------,-----,-------^--, | ||||||||| `--------' | O `+---------------------------^----------| `\_,-------, _________________________| / XXXXXX /`| / / XXXXXX / `\ / / XXXXXX /\______( Come to Dareland. / XXXXXX / / XXXXXX / It's better than bullets. (________( `------'
Fascist America, in 10 easy steps (guardian.co.uk)
From Hitler to Pinochet and beyond, history shows there are certain steps that any would-be dictator must take to destroy constitutional freedoms. And, argues Naomi Wolf, George Bush and his administration seem to be taking them all.
Jim Hightower: STEALING AMERICA'S MIDDLE-CLASS (jimhightower.com)
It's only 3,400 workers that Circuit City booted out the door, so what's the big deal? Well, it's not the number of workers offed, but who. Had the workforce at this electronics retailer grown too large? No, Circuit City is hiring 3,400 new workers to replace those fired. Had the fired workers been poor performers? Uh-uh, - in fact, they were the corporation's most knowledgeable and experienced salesclerks.
Jim Hightower: THE STENCH OF CORPORATE WELFARE (jimhightower.com)
Big corporations seems to be doing awfully well these days, scooping up record profits, getting massive tax breaks from the federal government, and cutting back on their employees. They're wallowing in wealth!
David Sirota: What Did You Do During the Ruling Class War, Daddy?
I am back from the Progressive States Network's first annual gala in conjunction with the National Conference of State Legislatures meeting in Washington, D.C. - a city where ruling class warfare rages on, despite (or perhaps because of) the new partisan makeup of the nation's capital.
PAUL KRUGMAN: A Hostage Situation (The New York Times)
There are two ways to describe the confrontation between Congress and the Bush administration over funding for the Iraq surge. You can pretend that it's a normal political dispute. Or you can see it for what it really is: a hostage situation, in which a beleaguered President Bush, barricaded in the White House, is threatening dire consequences for innocent bystanders - the troops - if his demands aren't met.
Frank Rich: Iraq Is the Ultimate Aphrodisiac (The New York Times)
President Bush has skipped the funerals of the troops he sent to Iraq. He took his sweet time to get to Katrina-devastated New Orleans. But last week he raced to Virginia Tech with an alacrity not seen since he hustled from Crawford to Washington to sign a bill interfering in Terri Schiavo's end-of-life medical care. Mr. Bush assumes the role of mourner in chief on a selective basis, and, as usual with the decider, the decisive factor is politics.
Sheryl Crow and Laurie David: Karl Rove Gets Thrown Under the Stop Global Warming Bus (huffingtonpost.com)
Last night Thelma and Louise drove the bus off the cliff or at least into the White House Correspondents Dinner. The "highlight" of the evening had to be when we were introduced to Karl Rove. How excited were we to have our first opportunity ever to talk directly to the Bush Administration about global warming. We asked Mr. Rove if he would consider taking a fresh look at the science of global warming. Much to our dismay, he immediately got combative. And it went downhill from there.
Scott Burns: Will You Ever Have Enough Money? (dallasnews.com)
Where our spending was once influenced by our immediate neighbors, it is now influenced by visible groups with much higher incomes such as top executives and TV families. In one surprising study result, Ms. Schor found that watching TV cost about $208 an hour because of how it influenced spending behavior. That's the exact opposite of the common belief that watching television is an inexpensive time absorber.
David Bruce: Wise Up! Problem-Solving
After diving into shallow water, 16-year-old Joni Eareckson broke her neck and was paralyzed. Eventually, after months of being suspended in a Stryker frame, she recovered enough to be able to sit in a wheelchair. Dick, her boyfriend, sometimes visited her, but unfortunately, they ran into a problem: Little privacy exists in a hospital. To solve the problem, they would go to an elevator and Dick would push the STOP button when they were in between floors. This gave them enough privacy for kissing.
Mashups come from all over the world, The
US, Norway, & Australia, & no matter where they
originate they take the shape of their creator as
well as the source material. Dublxero's (dublxero.multiply.com/ ) location (the UK,shhh!) is as
secretive as his true identity, yet his being
permeates throughout his bastard pop creations. He
refers to living in "my house, next to the other
houses", so if we cock an ear to the domicile with the
energetic, multiple-artist cuts thumping out of
it, we're on the right track.
Over a year & a half of his inventive music is
currently hosted on his website ( dublxero.multiply.com )
with enough vigor & creativity to satisfy
until the cows come home. From Insane Clown Posse to
Moloko he's continuously devised appealing ways to
rearrange already-existing musical fodder into the
kind of cut that makes a home in your brain to
stay. Who else would delight us with 'Flat Chitty
Chitty Bang Bang Beat', an aural meeting of Mr.Ouizo
with Dick Van Dyke? Or the amusing confection of 'The
Not So Crazy Frog Chorus', some Paul McCartney grazing
in a field of pop icon frogs!
On his ever-popular compilation 'Mashed To
Death', Dublxero shows us his pop & rock skills on
catchy fare like 'Who Told Me I Cud Do It Like This'
which contrasts Adam & the Ants - Puss in Boots / Roni
Size - Who Told You You Could Do It Like This / Bad
Brains - Rriot Squad / themes from Chorlton & the
Wheelies / Inspector Gadget & Interceptor /
feat.Rroxette - Joyride / Funboy 3 - Lunatics /
Rocksteady Crew - Rocksteady crew + a quick ICP drum
sample & totally pulls it off. That's a lot of mixing
to condense those into just a few minutes.
His 'Hate Songs For Lovers' album has us in awe
with 'Shatner Behaviour', an ingratiating affair that
introduces William Shatner to Björk & has us loving
it. This alongside dynamite pieces like 'No Thing
Called Love, aka A Beleev Um Inspektre Morse", A
longtime fave of mine consisting of Atari Teenage
Riot vs The Darkness. That collection is not to be
confused with his 'Love Songs For Haters', Dublxero
being a bootlegger who covers all the bases. Through
his 3-part 'Randoms' series right up to the
concept-piece 'F*ck the KLF; DUBLXERO Live At His
House', he's continuously provided bootleg content
with style & great sound.
His birthday is in a few days & we owe his folks
a debt of gratitude for his satisfying presence. Drop
by his place on the web & give him a chorus of 'for
he's a dj good fellow'! ( myspace.com/dublxero ).
Mix of the week-Get this one quick! It's only up
for a week or so more. Dangerscouse
( myspacecom/.dangerscouse23 ) gives us reason to
shake it with 'Party Animal'
( http://www.earskills.net/ ) a mighty funky party mix with tracks by
Ozomatli,Mocean Worker, & All Good Funk Alliance. It
wore me out in the best way!
Till next week, remember to also mix to the left. lol
CBS starts the night with a FRESH'Jericho', followed by a FRESH'Criminal Minds', then a FRESH'CSI: The 3rd One'.
Scheduled on a FRESHDave are Nicolas Cage, Barry Sonnenfeld, and the Fratellis.
Scheduled on a FRESHCraig are Jerry Springer, Mario, and Simply Red.
NBC opens the night with a RERUN'Thank God You're Here', follwoed by a FRESH'Crossing Jordan', then a FRESH'Medium'.
Scheduled on a FRESHLeno are Kiefer Sutherland, Maz Jobrani, and Mavis Staples.
Scheduled on a FRESHConan are Darrell Hammond, Andrew W.K., and Blue October.
Scheduled on a FRESHCraig are Nick Frost and Akon.
ABC begins the night with a FRESH'Jim', followed by a FRESH'Notes From The Underbelly', then a RERUN of last week's 'Lost', followed by a FRESH'Lost'.
Scheduled on a FRESHJimmy Kimmel are Santiago Cabrera and the Nightwatchman.
The CW offers a FRESH'America's Next Top Model', followed by a RERUN of last night's 'Pussycat Dolls Present: The Search For The Next Pussy'.
Faux has a FRESH 2-hour 'American Idol'.
MY has a FRESH'Saints & Sinners', followed by another FRESH'Saints & Sinners'.
Check local PBS listings for the FRESH'Bill Moyers Journal: Buying The War'.
A&E has 'CSI: The 2nd One', another 'CSI: The 2nd One', 'The Sopranos', and more 'The Sopranos'.
AMC offers the movie 'Moulin Rouge', followed by the movie 'Catwoman', then a FRESH'Hustle', followed by the movie 'No Way Out'.
BBC -
[12:00 PM] Ramsay's Kitchen Nightmares - Ep 4 La Riveria;
[1:00 PM] What Not To Wear - Episode 3;
[2:00 PM] The Weakest Link - Episode 93;
[3:00 PM] How Clean Is Your House? - Episode 5;
[3:30 PM] How Clean Is Your House? - Episode 6;
[4:00 PM] Changing Rooms - Ep. 3 Cumbria;
[4:30 PM] Changing Rooms - Ep. 4 Maidenhead;
[5:00 PM] Footballers Wive$ - Episode 8;
[6:00 PM] The Weakest Link - Episode 94;
[7:00 PM] BBC World News - BBC World News;
[7:30 PM] How Clean Is Your House? - Episode 1;
[8:00 PM] Whose Line Is It Anyway? - Episode 10;
[8:30 PM] Whose Line Is It Anyway? - Episode 14;
[9:00 PM] How Not To Decorate - Episode 5;
[10:00 PM] Footballers Wive$ - Episode 7;
[11:00 PM] How Not To Decorate - Episode 5;
[11:30 PM] Whose Line Is It Anyway? - Episode 9;
[12:00 AM] What Not To Wear - Season 6 - Ep 5 Widows and Widowers;
[1:00 AM] Footballers Wive$ - Episode 7;
[2:00 AM] What Not To Wear - Season 6 - Ep 5 Widows and Widowers;
[3:00 AM] Waterloo Road - Episode 1;
[4:00 AM] Waterloo Road - Episode 2;
[5:00 AM] Waterloo Road - Episode 3;
[6:00 AM] BBC World News - BBC World News. (ALL TIMES EDT)
Bravo has 'Project Runway', 'Shear Genius', another 'Shear Genius', and still another 'Shear Genius'.
Comedy Central has 'Scrubs', another 'Scrubs', last night's 'Jon Stewart', last night's 'Colbert Report', 'Chappelle's Show', 'South Park', another 'South Park', and 'Halfway Home'.
Scheduled on a FRESHJon Stewart is Garry Shandling.
Scheduled on a FRESHColbert Report is David Walker.
FX has the movie 'XXX', followed by the movie 'Men Of Honor'.
IFC -
[07:20 AM] IFC Short Film Showcase;
[08:20 AM] The Story of the Weeping Camel;
[09:55 AM] We Married Margo;
[11:25 AM] Gosford Park;
[01:45 PM] The Story of the Weeping Camel;
[03:20 PM] IFC News Special;
[03:30 PM] Ararat;
[05:30 PM] We Married Margo;
[07:00 PM] An Awfully Big Adventure;
[09:00 PM] A Midwinter's Tale;
[10:45 PM] Hamlet;
[12:45 AM] A Midwinter's Tale;
[02:30 AM] Hamlet;
[04:25 AM] An Awfully Big Adventure. (ALL TIMES EDT)
SciFi fills the night with 'The Lost Room' (parts 1 - 3).
Sundance -
[05:00 AM] Tickets;
[07:00 AM] Milo 55160;
[07:00 AM] Cold Comfort Farm;
[09:00 AM] Yves Saint Laurent: His Life and Times;
[10:00 AM] In Short: Conflict;
[11:00 AM] Emile;
[12:00 PM] Admissions;
[02:00 PM] Seven Times Lucky;
[03:00 PM] The Motorcycle Diaries;
[06:00 PM] Episode 4: Every Inch a King;
[07:00 PM] SOU;
[07:00 PM] Cold Comfort Farm;
[09:00 PM] Episode 4: The Ordinaries;
[09:00 PM] In Short: Festival 5;
[10:00 PM] Breathless (1960);
[11:00 PM] Little Death;
[12:00 AM] Episode 2;
[12:00 AM] Episode 2: Mikhail Baryshnikov + Alice Waters;
[01:00 AM] Mail Order Wife;
[03:00 AM] In Short: Festival 5;
[03:00 AM] Spider Forest;
[05:00 AM] Milo 55160. (ALL TIMES EDT)
Actor Denis Leary arrives to the Food Bank for New York City?s fifth annual ?Can-Do? dinner awards held at Pier Sixty in New York City on Monday, April 23, 2007.
Photo by Adam Rountree
Film critic Roger Ebert is telling the paparazzi to take all the pictures they want when he appears in public after surgery that has left him temporarily disfigured.
Part of his jawbone was removed, and two replacement operations have failed, he said. He is awaiting a third operation.
"When I turn up in Urbana, I will be wearing a gauze bandage around my neck, and my mouth will be seen to droop. So it goes," Ebert wrote.
"We spend too much time hiding illness. There is an assumption that I must always look the same. I hope to look better than I look now. But I'm not going to miss my festival," he added.
Willie Nelson and his tour manager were spared jail time Tuesday after pleading guilty to a misdemeanor count of marijuana possession.
Nelson and tour manager David Anderson, along with Nelson's sister, Bobbie Nelson, and two drivers, were issued citations on Sept. 18 after state troopers said they found marijuana and hallucinogenic mushrooms on the country legend's tour bus during a commercial-vehicle inspection on Interstate 10.
State District Judge Paul deMahy fined Nelson and Anderson $1,024 each and put both on probation for six months. As part of a plea agreement, the citation against Bobbie Nelson was dismissed.
Singers Mya, left, and Patti Labelle, right pose at the Lifetime cable channel's Upfront session in New York on Tuesday April 24, 2007. Lifetime executives outline upcoming shows for advertisers at the meeting in hopes on getting sponsors.
Photo by Rick Maiman
New York. Nighttime. Post-apocalypse. As a life-warping illness devastates the American populace, survivors gather at a pier by the Brooklyn Bridge, desperate to be evacuated.
It is a central moment in Warner Bros.' December release "I Am Legend," a $150 million-plus sci-fi actioner starring Will Smith. But as impressive a nail-biter as this particular scene will surely be, its drama is rivaled by that of the process of mounting and shooting it on six successive nights in January.
In addition to complying with the requirements of no fewer than 14 government agencies, producers had to bring in a crew of 250, plus 1,000 extras, including 160 members of the National Guard in full combat gear. They commandeered a flotilla of Coast Guard boats, grappled with hypothermia-inducing temperatures, coped with dozens of production-related injuries -- and nursed a frozen helicopter.
All this cost the studio at least $5 million, according to executive producer Michael Tadross -- six times that, if Internet reports are to be believed.
Universal Studios confirmed Tuesday that it was creating a new attraction based on The Simpsons at its theme parks in Orlando and Hollywood.
The ride, which Universal described as "a hysterical, almost unimaginable adventure," will take over the locations formerly occupied by Back to the Future: The Ride at both parks. It is expected to open in spring 2008.
The attraction aims to incorporate the show's signature humor, with the original actors voicing all the familiar characters that pop up in between jolts, bumps, dips and plunges into darkness.
Margaret Atwood is, undeniably, one of the grand dames of Canadian literature and she is already starting to receive accolades for her life's work.
Some might call them "lifetime achievement awards," but not Atwood. She wants to makes it clear that she is far from finished adding to her already impressive list of accomplishments.
Atwood said she is thrilled to be up for consideration for the Man Booker International, one of the richest and most prestigious prizes in English literature which is awarded for an author's entire body of work.
"You say, 'I'm not finished, I'm not finished. Wait, wait,"' Atwood said in an interview with The Canadian Press on Tuesday in Montreal, where she will be awarded the Grand Prix of the Blue Metropolis International Literary Festival at a gala opening on Wednesday, also for her collective works.
Writer and director George Lucas (L) poses with cast member Mark Hamill, who played "Luke Skywalker", at the 30th anniversary screening of "Star Wars" presented by the Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences in Beverly Hills, California April 23, 2007. The event kicks off the fourth installment of the Academy's "Great To Be Nominated" series.
Photo by Mario Anzuoni
Opening statements were set to begin on Wednesday in the murder trial of pioneering rock producer Phil Spector, who is accused of shooting a B-movie actress to death at his Los Angeles-area home.
A jury of nine men and three women was sworn in last week for the sensational case, which could last up to three months and is expected to draw worldwide media coverage.
Superior Court Judge Larry Paul Fidler scheduled opening statements to begin on Wednesday after the last of six alternate jurors was chosen on Tuesday. The alternates would be called upon to weigh the evidence should any of the original 12 panelists be forced to step down.
Fidler has ruled that the trial can be broadcast live, making it the biggest celebrity case to be televised from Los Angeles since O.J. Simpson was acquitted of murder charges in 1995 in a lengthy, racially charged trial that brought scorn to the city's legal system.
Elvis Costello arrives to the Food Bank for New York City's fifth annual 'Can-Do' dinner awards held at Pier Sixty in New York City on Monday, April 23, 2007.
Photo by Adam Rountree
Hollywood star Sylvester Stallone has provided medical documents to Australia's customs after being charged with importing 48 vials of banned human growth hormone, his lawyer told a Sydney court on Tuesday.
Stallone, who has not yet entered a plea, was not in the Sydney court for the brief hearing. His case was adjourned until May 15 to allow customs to examine Stallone's medical material, which was not revealed in court.
Customs said the 48 vials of prohibited human growth hormone were found in his luggage. The maximum fine for the offence is A$110,000 (45,447 pounds).
A coalition of religious leaders took on the Catholic Church, the U.S. Supreme Court and the Bush administration on Tuesday with a plea to take religion out of health care in the United States.
They said last week's Supreme Court decision outlawing a certain type of abortion demonstrated that religious belief was interfering with personal rights and the U.S. health care system in general.
The group, calling itself the Religious Coalition for Reproductive Choice, said it planned to submit its proposals to other church groups and lobby Congress and state legislators.
The group also complained about Catholic-owned hospitals that refuse to sterilize women who ask for it, refuse to let doctors perform abortions and do not provide contraception.
A classic-car broker who swindled actor Nicolas Cage and other clients before he was caught in Spain was sentenced Tuesday to five years in prison and $1.8 million in restitution.
Peter Brotman, 47, of Oaks, sold collectables such as a 1964 Rolls-Royce, a 1988 Aston Martin and a 1954 Jaguar on consignment, then kept the money or used it to pay off earlier debts.
Cage, identified in the 14-count indictment as "N.C.," lost $300,000 in April 2004 when Brotman didn't send him the full proceeds from the sale of three Ferraris and a Cobra.
For the first time astronomers have discovered a planet outside our solar system that is potentially habitable, with Earth-like temperatures, a find researchers described Tuesday as a big step in the search for "life in the universe."
The planet was discovered by the European Southern Observatory's telescope in La Silla, Chile, which has a special instrument that splits light to find wobbles in different wave lengths. Those wobbles can reveal the existence of other worlds.
What they revealed is a planet circling the red dwarf star, Gliese 581. Red dwarfs are low-energy, tiny stars that give off dim red light and last longer than stars like our sun. Until a few years ago, astronomers didn't consider these stars as possible hosts of planets that might sustain life.
The discovery of the new planet, named 581 c, is sure to fuel studies of planets circling similar dim stars. About 80 percent of the stars near Earth are red dwarfs.
Scientists have identified the Godzilla of fungi, a giant, prehistoric fossil that has evaded classification for more than a century, U.S. researchers said on Monday.
A chemical analysis has shown that the 20-foot-tall (6-metre) organism with a tree-like trunk was a fungus that became extinct more than 350 million years ago, according to a study appearing in the May issue of the journal Geology.
Known as Prototaxites, the giant fungus originally was thought to be a conifer. Then some believed it was a lichen, or various types of algae. Some suspected it was a fungus.
Samples of the giant fungi have been found all over the world from 420 million to 350 million years ago during a period in which millipedes, bugs and worms were among the first creatures to make their home on dry land. No animals with a backbone had left the oceans yet.
Aretha Franklin poses while attending the Broadway show 'Hairspray,' on March 23, 2007 in New York. Auditions for singing and non-singing parts in a musical production based on Aretha Franklin's autobiography will be held May 1-3, 2007, in suburban Detroit.
Photo by Shiho Fukada
Almost 85 percent of Chinese people share just 100 surnames, with Wang, which literally means "king", being the most popular, the official Xinhua news agency said on Tuesday.
There are 93 million Wangs in China, followed closely by 92 million people with the family name Li and 88 million called Zhang, Xinhua said, citing newly-announced calculations by the Ministry of Public Security.
Another seven common names -- including Chen, Zhou and Lin -- have at last 20 million members each, it added.
But there are also some family names which are only used by a very few people, such as Guo, meaning to "cross over", and Mu, which means "mother".
Still recovering from the Don Imus scandal, CBS Radio suspended two local shock jocks after they twice broadcast a racially charged prank call to employees at a Chinese restaurant.
The hosts of the daily morning show, WFNY-FM's "The Dog House With JV and Elvis," have been suspended indefinitely without pay, CBS Radio spokeswoman Karen Mateo told The New York Times in an e-mail Monday. One of the hosts, Jeff Vandergrift, apologized on Monday's show, she said.
In the segment, broadcast on April 5 - a day after the infamous Imus comment on CBS - and again last week, a caller to a Chinese restaurant intersperses an order for takeout with lewd language.
The caller tells one female employee he wants to come to the restaurant to see her naked and refers to a part of her body as "hot, Asian, spicy." The caller also attempts to order "shrimp flied lice."
Standing on the wind-swept flatlands of southern Vermilion County, you might think you'd have to drive the 180 miles to Chicago's Field Museum to find the nearest fossilized tree trunk from the Pennsylvania Age, 300 million years ago. Nah, just drill straight down.
That's where coal miners working south and west of Georgetown have unearthed, chunk by fossilized chunk, what has revealed itself over the past few years to be the remains of a fossilized rain forest.
It covers about 15 square miles, all more than 200 feet below ground, and probably is the largest intact rain forest from that period ever studied, according to Scott Elrick of the Illinois State Geological Survey.
"We never encountered one whole forest preserved in one shot like this," Elrick said Monday. "The fossils just didn't stop."
A mineral recently discovered in Serbia has the same composition as kryptonite - the fictional substance that robs Superman of his powers - the British Museum said Tuesday.
A drill core of the unusual mineral was unearthed in Serbia by the mining group Rio Tinto PLC, which turned it over to mineral expert Chris Stanley at the Natural History Museum for analysis.
"Towards the end of my research I searched the Web using the mineral's chemical formula, sodium lithium boron silicate hydroxide, and was amazed to discover that same scientific name written on a case of rock containing kryptonite stolen by Lex Luthor from a museum in the film 'Superman Returns,'" Stanley said.
The material is white, powdery and not radioactive - unlike the glowing green crystals usually depicted in the Superman comics. It will be formally named Jadarite when it is described in the European Journal of Mineralogy later this year.
Prime-Time viewership numbers compiled by Nielsen Media Research for April 16-22. Listings include the week's ranking, with viewership for the week and season-to-date rankings in parentheses. An "X" in parentheses denotes a one-time-only presentation.
1. (1) "American Idol" (Wednesday), Fox, 28.93 million viewers.
2. (1) "American Idol" (Tuesday), Fox, 26.55 million viewers.
3. (8) "House," Fox, 22.41 million viewers.
4. (6) "Grey's Anatomy," ABC, 21.13 million viewers.
5. (5) "Dancing With the Stars" (Monday), ABC, 18.87 million viewers.
6. (12) "Dancing With the Stars Results" (Tuesday), ABC, 16.54 million viewers.
7. (9) "Desperate Housewives," ABC, 15.91 million viewers.
8. (10) "CSI: Miami," CBS, 15.36 million viewers.
9. (16) "Survivor: Fiji," CBS, 13.33 million viewers.
10. (16) "Two and a Half Men," CBS, 13.03 million viewers.
11. (26) "Shark," CBS, 12.54 million viewers.
12. (4) "CSI: Crime Scene Investigation," CBS, 12.45 million viewers.
13. (49) "King of Queens," CBS, 12.22 million viewers.
14. (15) "Lost," ABC, 12.08 million viewers.
15. (26) "Extreme Makeover: Home Edition," ABC, 11.68 million viewers.
16. (24) "24," Fox, 11.32 million viewers.
17. (14) "Deal or No Deal" (Monday), NBC, 11.19 million viewers.
18. (20) "NCIS," CBS, 11.14 million viewers.
19. (23) "CSI: NY," CBS, 11.13 million viewers.
20. (X) "Hallmark Hall of Fame," CBS, 10.66 million viewers.
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