Can you believe the Supreme court of the United states is considering the constitutionality of a high school principal suspending a student for posting a banner saying "Bong Hits 4 Jesus" in the street, off school property, in the path of an Olympic runner, hoping to get his message on television? If the sign had appeared in the hallways of the school during a Christmas pageant, the principal might have had a weak leg to stand on. After all, to encourage drug use on school property is tantamount to encouraging cigarettes and alcohol, but I would contend the saying does NOT encourage drug use and is just a joke, a pretty funny one, with no particular message whatsoever other than to make you think, so let's do that.
A high school principal punishing a student, Joseph Frederick, for activities off campus, even a "school sponsored event," seems a stretch too impossible to imagine. Or is it? Maybe this is the way to go. Maybe schools should give us grades for everything we do outside of school, a B-minus in watching television, an F in picking your nose in private. The case was a slippery slope that the Alaskan appellate court, in a unique display of common sense, threw out. The student won and that should have been that. A triumph of free speech for the state of Alaska. Case closed.
But then a law firm decided that this would not stand. Without a client, strictly on their own initiative, they took the case to the Supreme Court, begging them to overturn the Alaskan appellate court's decision. They're asking the highest court in the land to exonerate the principal (and principle), to allow the eight days of suspension, already served, to stand as reasonable. And the Supreme Court, in their vast supremacy, decided this was worthy of their attention. Apparently the message "Bong hits 4 Jesus" is so reprehensible that it simply has to be punished. Instead of going after the originator, the online site whitehouse.org, who daily display it in front of thousands of internet surfers, and from whom I stole and pasted it above in a blatant display of copyright infringement, the law firm decided to go after some kid who wrote it down on a banner and displayed it in front of what might have been dozens of people who weren't on the internet at the moment. Since no cops at the scene had the foresight to bash his head in, much less arrest him for public indecency, it was up to his school principal to bestow suitable punishment upon the poor sinner from hell who was otherwise getting good grades.
This wouldn't be a political issue if it weren't for the fact this case wouldn't still exist except for the wretched man who spent bazillions of taxpayer dollars investigating the president's bodily functions, the king of concern for what people do in private, yes, it's the rebirth of Ken Starr, a man with an incomprehensible agenda. Not content with shoving oral sex down our throats every day for years, now he thinks we'll be outraged at the very idea of the son of God, born of a virgin, miracle worker, resurrected from the grave after dying for our sins, chuffing a bongload of Hawaiian. After all, wouldn't he more likely have come in contact with Afghani hash?
Other than the obvious hallucinations in the New Testament, there is no particular evidence of drug use in the year zero other than the fact that clothing was made of hemp and, every once in while, the hemp plant spews out flowers with remarkable power. Jesus had means and opportunity, which leaves motive. No Playstations, no iPods, no malls, nothing to do but handle your hormones while wearing a robe and dealing with a mom with a definite Madonna complex and two dads, one on earth who isn't biological, and one in the sky with a God complex who is. Sounds like motive to me. It's important to remember there is no evidence whatsoever that Jesus DIDN'T enjoy a fatty once in a while. Consumption of leaves by setting them on fire is a crime that disposes of its own evidence.
If I were rich, I'd hire an expert, probably myself, and search the world's museums for antiquities, identifying bongs that have been misidentified by the archeological community as drinking vessels or tools for penis enlargement.
Though the whitehouse.org graphic accompanying the mischievous slogan shows the son of God getting a blast of gnarly, the quote itself suggests no such thing, and Joseph Frederick's sign didn't have the graphic, making the message something like "Mushrooms 4 Mohammed" or "Jell-O shots 4 Buddha" or "Crystal Meth 4 Krishnamurti." The "4" means "for," implying not that Jesus, during his teenage years, might have been offered a toke somewhere in his wandering, but that we, in celebration of his glory, should fire one up once in a while. The censoring of Jesus' drug use is the most plausible explanation for the fact that not one of the gospels covers his teenage years.
I smell a television series, a cross between Smallville and Buffy the Vampire Slayer, in biblical times, following the exploits of our hapless wandering pre-messiah going through puberty and fighting demons, both personal and real, with his loyal gang of goofy followers who learn a thing or two about the wiles of Satan and his loyal gang of snarly orcs. Hilarious preparations for Armageddon ensue as teenage Jesus cures acne with a touch and changes water into Jagermeister with a wave of his hand. Fuck that Aramaic bullshit. Our Jesus speaks English like a good Mexican in America. This is before he became well known, so he always introduces himself to people as "Christ, Jesus Christ, with a C-H." It's his catch phrase and, of course, the name of the show.
"Christ with a C-H" is a registered trademark of Michael Dare, unless registration consists of doing anything other than writing this sentence. Any major, or even minor network production of a TV show called "Christ with a C-H" will be considered an act of copyright infringement to be punished by their old high school principals (and principles).
"A record 7 million people - one in every 32 U.S. adults - were behind bars, on probation or on parole by the end of last year, a Justice Department report released yesterday shows.
"Of those, 2.2 million were in prison or jail, an increase of 2.7 percent over the previous year, according to the report.
"More than 4.1 million people were on probation and 784,208 were on parole at the end of 2005. Prison releases are increasing, but admissions are increasing more...
"'Misguided policies that create harsher sentences for nonviolent drug offenses are disproportionately responsible for the increasing rates of women in prisons and jails,' Marc Mauer, executive director of the Sentencing Project, a Washington-based group that supports criminal justice reform, said in a statement.
"From 1995 to 2003, inmates incarcerated in federal prisons for drug offenses have accounted for 49 percent of total prison population growth."
"Persons taking no active part in the hostilities, including members of armed forces who have laid down their arms and those placed hors de combat by sickness, wounds, detention, or any other cause, shall in all circumstances be treated humanely, without any adverse distinction founded on race, colour, religion or faith, sex, birth or wealth, or any other similar criteria... The wounded and sick, as well as the infirm, and expectant mothers, shall be the object of particular protection and respect... As far as military considerations allow, each Party to the conflict shall facilitate the steps taken to search for the killed and wounded, to assist the shipwrecked and other persons exposed to grave danger, and to protect them against pillage and ill-treatment."
"'The administration has not only the right, but the duty, in my opinion, to pursue Fifth Column movements,' Graham, R-S.C., told Gonzales during Senate Judiciary Committee hearings on Feb. 6. 'I stand by this President's ability, inherent to being Commander-in-Chief, to find out about Fifth Column movements, and I don't think you need a warrant to do that,' Graham added, volunteering to work with the administration to draft guidelines for how best to neutralize this alleged threat.
"'Senator,' a smiling Gonzales responded, 'the President already said we'd be happy to listen to your ideas.'
"In less paranoid times, Graham's comments might be viewed by many Americans as a Republican trying to have it both ways - ingratiating himself to an administration of his own party while seeking some credit from Washington centrists for suggesting Congress should have at least a tiny say in how Bush runs the War on Terror.
"But recent developments suggest that the Bush administration may already be contemplating what to do with Americans who are deemed insufficiently loyal or who disseminate information that may be considered helpful to the enemy.
"Top U.S. officials have cited the need to challenge 'news' that undercuts Bush's actions as a key front in defeating the terrorists, who are aided by news informers in the words of Defense Secretary Donald Rumsfeld.
"Plus, there was that curious development in January when the Army Corps of Engineers awarded Halliburton subsidiary Kellogg Brown & Root a $385 million contract to construct detention centers somewhere in the United States, to deal with an emergency influx of immigrants into the U.S., or to 'support the rapid development of new programs,' KBR said...
"Less attention centered on the phrase 'rapid development of new programs' and what kind of programs would require a major expansion of detention centers, each capable of holding 5,000 people. Jamie Zuieback, a spokeswoman for Immigration and Customs Enforcement, declined to elaborate on what these new programs might be."
Ever wonder where you'd emerge if you could dig a hole straight through the earth to the other side from precisely where you are right now? My hole ends in the Indian Ocean near Madagascar. Go here to find out where you would most likely drown.
One may ask if the U.S. is ultimately leaving Iraq, why is the military building 14 permanent bases around the country? One answer would be "we're never leaving." Check out this interactive guide to our military bases in Iraq.
Your Well-Considered Answers to Last Week's Remarkably Erudite Stupid Question of the Week
What is the name for the psychological condition whereupon somebody who saw themselves portrayed by a certain actor finds themselves seeing a bit of themselves in each subsequent role played by that same actor?
Cinephasia - Jimmy McConnell
Fanatischism: When the whole world revolves around you. Cosmophrenia: Do I feel bad for Kenny Kramer or what? - Dwight Burke
Syncretistic Idio-agono-mimesis complex, obviously. - William Kirk
Cruise Control - JD
Perhaps 'auto-acknowledgism' is what's making you weird in the head. 'Egotism-by-proxy' could also be what some doctor would've said. 'Affective fading star disorder' just kind of drops like lead. Of course, it might be termed a serial 'thespian relationship,' which is fine but just don't try to get wed. - RS Janes
"Persons attempting to find a motive in this narrative will be prosecuted; persons attempting to find a moral in it will be banished; persons attempting to find a plot in it will be shot." - Mark Twain: The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn -
"Trying to determine what is going on in the world by reading newspapers is like trying to tell the time by watching the second hand of a clock."
- Ben Hecht -
"The path of least resistance and least trouble is a mental rut already made. It requires troublesome work to undertake the alternation of old beliefs. Self-conceit often regards it as a sign of weakness to admit that a belief to which we have once committed ourselves is wrong. We get so identified with an idea that it is literally a 'pet' notion and we rise to its defense and stop our eyes and ears to anything different." - John Dewey -
"Some years ago, the New York City fire department made a fundamental paradigm shift away from fire emergency response toward fire prevention. The department changed the way it approached its job and turned more energy and resources into public education, early detection systems, better building codes, and addressing some of the most persistent causes of fire. They saved lives and, over a few short years, began fighting fewer and less devastating fires. A similar shift in approach to conflict could save lives and reduce the occasion of war.
"The U.S. can help lead this shift. The threats of weapons of mass destruction, terrorist networks, oppressive regimes, ethnic conflict, failed states, and devastating poverty and disease can be diminished through policies and programs designed to peacefully prevent the outbreak of violence and address the root causes of conflict. As U.S. Senator Joseph Biden (DE) proposed in late July 2003, 'Instead of a preemption doctrine, what we need is a prevention doctrine which diffuses problems long before they explode in our face.' Such a U.S. policy framework would build on the efforts already underway within some U.S. government agencies, at the UN, among European allies, in regional organizations, and among civil society groups to develop stronger capacities for early warning, early response, and addressing root causes. It would replace the policy of 'preemptive' war with one of war prevention."
"When I called former Democratic Sen. Gary Hart at his office in Colorado, I explained that I was working on a story about permanent bases in Iraq. 'Right,' Hart replied, 'unlike the New York Times and the Washington Post. The fact that no one's discussing this is a great mystery to me,' Hart told me.
"If the topic of permanent bases in Iraq seems unfamiliar, it's because, as Hart noted, there's been barely a whisper about them in the mainstream media. While the deteriorating situation in Iraq is making headlines daily, it's been two months since any reports on the presence or construction of bases have emerged from major press outlets. Yet, the issue of permanent bases is one that cuts to the heart of not only how long we intend to stay in Iraq, but why we got there in the first place.
"'If the goal of ... the Bush administration, was to overthrow Saddam Hussein, install a friendly government in Baghdad, set up a permanent political and military presence in Iraq, and dominate the behavior of the region (including securing oil supplies),' Hart wrote in May, 'then you build permanent bases for some kind of permanent American military presence. If the goal was to spread democracy and freedom, then you don't.'"
"This guy who was so not my style came over to me and my friends and asked: 'Do you happen to know how much a polar bear weighs?' We said no and kept walking, and then he said, 'Well, it's enough to break the ice. Hi, I'm Brian.'"
"Mr. Buffett compiled a data sheet of the men and women who work in his office. He had each of them make a fraction; the numerator was how much they paid in federal income tax and in payroll taxes for Social Security and Medicare, and the denominator was their taxable income. The people in his office were mostly secretaries and clerks, though not all.
"It turned out that Mr. Buffett, with immense income from dividends and capital gains, paid far, far less as a fraction of his income than the secretaries or the clerks or anyone else in his office. Further, in conversation it came up that Mr. Buffett doesn't use any tax planning at all. He just pays as the Internal Revenue Code requires. How can this be fair? he asked of how little he pays relative to his employees. How can this be right?
"Even though I agreed with him, I warned that whenever someone tried to raise the issue, he or she was accused of fomenting class warfare.
"'There's class warfare, all right,' Mr. Buffett said, 'but its my class, the rich class, that's making war, and we're winning.'"
"Most of the harm that comes from drugs is because they are illegal...
"Moreover, if even a small fraction of the money we now spend on trying to enforce drug prohibition were devoted to treatment and rehabilitation, in an atmosphere of compassion not punishment, the reduction in drug usage and in the harm done to the users could be dramatic.
"This plea comes from the bottom of my heart. Every friend of freedom, and I know you are one, must be as revolted as I am by the prospect of turning the United States into an armed camp, by the vision of jails filled with casual drug users and of an army of enforcers empowered to invade the liberty of citizens on slight evidence.
"Something important in the overall scheme of the American experiment happened this week. "On Monday morning, MSNBC anchor Contessa Brewer appeared on cable television screens across the United States and announced: 'The news from Iraq is becoming grimmer every day. Over the long holiday weekend bombings killed more than 200 people in a Shiite neighborhood in Baghdad. And six Sunni men were doused with kerosene and burned alive. Shiite Muslims are the majority, but Sunnis like Saddam Hussein ruled that country until the war. Now, the battle between Shiites and Sunnis has created a civil war in Iraq. Beginning this morning, MSNBC will refer to the fighting in Iraq as a civil war - a phrase the White House continues to resist. But after careful thought, MSNBC and NBC News decided over the weekend, the terminology is appropriate, as armed militarized factions fight for their own political agendas. We'll have a lots more on the situation in Iraq and the decision to use the phrase, civil war.'
"The statement followed a similar decision by the Los Angeles Times to drop the pretense of referring to the fighting in Iraq as something other than the civil war it has obviously been for some time. "What is important about this development is that, for the first time since the debate about Iraq began, some--though certainly not all--major media outlets in the United States are making their own judgments based on developments in the Middle East. Up until now, major media has, with few exceptions, failed to embrace that most basic of journalistic responsibilities. Rather, it has served as a stenography service for the Bush-Cheney administration. - John Nichols: News Flash: Major Media Begins to Think for Itself -
"This strange interlude at the White House, when Bush asked Webb about his son in Iraq, Webb said he wants to bring the troops home, and Bush barked: 'I didn't ask you that' says a lot about Bush and Webb.
"Jim Webb has vast and enormous experience in military combat and military policy over the decades. Why on earth didn't Bush pull him aside and ask his private counsel? Not only does Webb know far more than Bush about real wars and not only does Webb have an infinitely better record than Bush being right about this war, but Webb probably could have given some serious insight about what his son tells him from the ground.
"But the Decider has already Decided.
"My guess is, what JFK would have done, is invite Webb to the Oval Office, and while they were sitting in the Oval Office would have called the son in real time and asked: what the hell is going on over there? What do you think we should do?
"But just like McCain is no Webb, Bush is no JFK.
"A word to the anonymous Democratic staff who said Webb would be 'a real pain'. Cool it, pal. What the Senate needs are people like Webb who tell it straight, call it true, go against the grain and are willing to violate the code of what most Americans think is Sodom and Gomorrah on the Potomac.
"The Senate could have used Jim Webb when the Iraq war was debated in 2002."
"Fresh thinking about what ails newspapers arrived in yesterday's (Nov. 29) Wall Street Journal, where staffer William M. Bulkeley contributed a column titled 'The Internet Allows Consumers to Trim Wasteful Purchases.' Bulkeley explains how the photographic film industry, encyclopedia publishers, the music industry, and the advertising industry feasted on buyers by forcing them to purchase things they didn't want - prints of all 24 shots from their camera or a whole album to secure one favorite song, for example. 'The business models required customers to pay for detritus to get the good stuff,' Bulkeley writes. But digital cameras, the Web, iTunes, and search-related advertising have stripped those industries of their power to charge for detritus.
"Bulkeley could have easily applied the wisdom of his lesson more broadly to newspapers. It's not that the complete gestalt of local, state, national, and international news plus sports, comics, classified, opinion, and hints on fashion, home, entertainment, and food isn't still useful. It is. But given a choice, and the economic means to make a choice, many buyers prefer to make an unbundled purchase. Unbundling the news they want from the news they don't want is what the Web allows readers to do now."
"AMORALITY: A quality admired and rewarded in modern organizations, where it is referred to through metaphors such as professionalism and efficiency... Immorality is doing wrong of our own volition. Amorality is doing it because a structure or an organization expects us to do it. Amorality is thus worse than immorality because it involves denying our responsibility and therefore our existence as anything more than an animal."
- John Ralston Saul: The Doubter's Companion -
"George Horvat, an exceptionally gifted inventor created a remarkable system initially designed to assist his brother-in-law, a truck driver. Additionally it would help lower highway accidents and deaths.
"Horvat called his system the Traffic Speed Surveillance System (TS). It included roadway monitor transceivers that would receive speed, vehicle identification and driver information which would then be transmitted to a central processing station for identifying speed limit violators. The system also includes a vehicle disable feature which requires that the driver and vehicle identification be entered to operate the vehicle...
"On May 9, 1986, two years after filing with the patent office, Horvat finally received a copy of the 'Issue Fee Receipt' which stated that 'the application will be issued as U.S. Patent No. 4,591,823 on May 27, 1986' Horvat felt protected. He followed the legal steps, paid the stipulated fees and obtained a patent which protected his invention.
"On October 7, 2004, an article appeared in World Net Daily. 'A little-known federal agency is planning a new monitoring program by which the government would track every car on the road by using onboard transceivers.' The agency, the Intelligent Transportation Systems Joint Program Office, is part of the Department of Transportation. According to an extensive report in the Charlotte, N.C., Creative Loafing, the agency doesn't respond to public inquiries about its activity...
"The very same year that Horvat's patent expired; the same Department of Transportation that rejected his invention reveals their plans for 'their' system? The article also states that more than $4 billion in federal tax dollars had already been spent in laying the foundation. The article says that they had been working on the project for 13 years. Senator Kasten presented the DOT with all the plans, diagrams, etc. in 1986. Horvat was told that traffic was a state responsibility. The DOT plan includes transceivers or 'onboard units' that will transmit data from each car to the system...
"Although the federal government financed the development of the system, it would require mega money to impose this 'Big Brother' tracking system throughout the world. It is going to take - the international banking community.
"Once the system is brought to life, both the corporations, and the government stands to reap billions in revenues. Companies plan to use the technology to sell endless user services and upgrades to drivers. For governments, tracking cars' movements means the ability to tax drivers for their driving habits, and ultimately to use a punitive tax system to control where they drive and when, a practice USDOT documents predict will be common throughout the country by 2022."
dIsInFoTaInMeNt ToDaY is free and may be reproduced in any form, preferably parchment. It consists of information from dozens of sources, cut up, thrown in the air, and recycled randomly. It is sent all over the place, so I apologize if you're seeing the same thing twice. If you see a joke, graphic, or news item that came from or through you, thanks, send more, and please accept the fact that much of dIsInFoTaInMeNt ToDaY is unacknowledgeable, and if I sought permission from everyone whose bastardized material showed up here, I'd never get anything else done. Please note that I don't even put my own name on it. If you're still pissed off, hey, it's either satire or fair use.
PAUL KRUGMAN: Two More Years (The New York Times)
I'm worried, however, that Democrats may have counted on the Iraq Study Group to provide them with political cover. Now that the study group has apparently wimped out, will the Democrats do the same? Well, here's a question for those who might be tempted, yet again, to shy away from a confrontation with Mr. Bush over Iraq: How do you ask a man to be the last to die for a bully's ego?
Nathan Hayes: Letter attacking Wal-Mart for policies friendly to gays is depressing as hell (athensnews.com)
I grew up on a small farm in Appalachia. I had a great role model for a father. He was (and still is) a strong, masculine "man's man," but also caring , sensitive and full of love. My mother is the perfect partner for him. She kept a clean house, loved Christmas cards, and tended to all of our needs in the most loving, accepting way. They worked a lot but still had time for all of us kids, and I never in any way felt deprived of either of them or spent more time with one than the other. I grew up on beautiful farmland, having never experienced any sexual abuse or trauma because of my environment. In truth, they raised me to be, if anything, loving and gentle.
David Bruce: Wise Up! Good Deeds (athensnews.com)
Early in her career, after Anne McCaffrey had published two stories, she attended a science-fiction convention where she met some writers, including James Bliss, whom she had admired for years. Mr. Bliss asked her, "Anne, what has happened? You've published two lovely stories. What's happened? Why haven't you written anything more?" She explained that she was trying to write more, and Mr. Bliss said, "Well, you should." Afterward, all she could think about was, "Jim Bliss says I can write. Jim Bliss says I can write. Jim Bliss says I can write." The vote of confidence in her writing had good results; she became the author of many, many science fiction novels.
And now the problem is fixed! Today's page loaded just fine, and when I went back to yesterday's page and Saturday's page, all the information is there. Just too weird. (But I'm glad to be able to catch up!)
I hate the new 'improved' Yahoo mail. They've started inserting links.
Generally, the link has had no relation to the word.
In one, a person named 'Oscar Smith' was mentioned - and Yahoo linked the name 'Oscar' to the Oscars™. Argh.
Tonight, Tuesday:
CBS begins the night with a RERUN'NCIS', followed by a FRESH'3 Lbs.', then the FRESH'Victoria's Secret Fashion Show'.
On a RERUNDave (from 9/19/06) are Ventriloquist Jay Johnson and Darwin, Patrick Dempsey, and Kasabian.
Scheduled on a FRESHCraig are Ice T amd Henry Cho.
NBC starts the night with a FRESH'Friday Night Lights', followed by a RERUN'Law & Order: Criminal Intent', then a RERUN'Law & Order: Speical Victims Unit'.
Scheduled on a FRESHLeno are Dennis Miller, San Diego Charger LaDainian Tomlinson, and K.T. Tunstall.
Scheduled on a FRESHConan are Kevin Nealon amd Deftones.
On a RERUNCarson Daly (from 10/10/06) are Anthony Anderson and Amos Lee.
ABC opens the night with the chestnut 'Santa Claus Is Coming To Town', followed by a FRESH'Big Day', then a FRESH'Help Me Help You', followed by a FRESH'Boston Legal'.
Scheduled on a FRESHJimmy Kimmel are David Allen Grier, Tatum O'Neal, and Lily Allen.
The CW offers a FRESH'Gilmore Girls', followed by a RERUN'Veronica Mars'.
Faux has a FRESH'Standoff', followed by a RERUN'House'.
MY has a FRESH'Desire', followed by a FRESH'Fashion House'.
A&E has 'CSI: The 2nd One', another 'CSI: The 2nd One', 'Dog The Bounty Hunter', another 'Dog The Bounty Hunter', still another 'Dog The Bounty Hunter', and yet another 'Dog The Bounty Hunter'.
AMC offers the movie 'Romancing The Stone', followed by the movie 'Miracle On 34th Street', then the movie 'Miracle On 34th Street', again.
BBC -
[2:00 pm] As Time Goes By - Episode 5;
[2:40 pm] Are You Being Served - Dear Sexy Knickers;
[3:20 pm] Keeping Up Appearances - Episode 5;
[4:00 pm] The Avengers - The Positive-Negative Man;
[5:00 pm] Footballers Wives - Episode 8;
[6:00 pm] BBC World News;
[6:30 pm] Cash in the Attic - Episode 6;
[7:00 pm] The Benny Hill Show - Episode 50;
[9:00 pm] The Avengers - Who's Who?;
[10:00 pm] Doctor Who - Ep 3 The Unquiet Dead;
[12:00 am] The Benny Hill Show - Episode 51;
[1:00 am] Doctor Who - Ep 3 The Unquiet Dead;
[2:00 am] The Avengers - Who's Who?;
[3:00 am] Bodies - Episode 4;
[4:00 am] Bodies - Episode 5;
[5:00 am] Bodies - Episode 6;
[6:00 am] BBC World News. (ALL TIMES EST)
Bravo has 'Top Chef', followed by the movie 'Cider House Rules', then the movie 'Cider House Rules', again.
Comedy Central has 'Scrubs', another 'Scrubs', last night's 'Jon Stewart', last night's 'Colbert Report', 'Mind Of Mencia', 'South Park', 'Chappelle's Show', and another 'Chappelle's Show'.
Scheduled on a FRESHJon Stewart is Sen. John Danforth.
Scheduled on a FRESHColbert Report is Steven D. Leavitt.
History has 'Modern Marvels', 'Little Ice Age: Big Chill', and 'Man Moment Machine'.
IFC -
[06:35 AM] Media Lab Shorts Uploaded;
[07:00 AM] Keep The River On Your Right: A Modern Cannibal Tale;
[08:35 AM] Rank;
[10:15 AM] Mondays in the Sun;
[12:10 PM] Keep The River On Your Right: A Modern Cannibal Tale;
[01:50 PM] Rank;
[03:30 PM] IFC News Special: This Film Is Not Yet Rated;
[03:45 PM] Mondays in the Sun;
[05:45 PM] Magnolia;
[09:00 PM] Forbidden Games;
[10:35 PM] The 400 Blows;
[12:15 AM] The Spirit of the Beehive;
[02:00 AM] Magnolia;
[05:10 AM] Forbidden Games. (ALL TIMES EST)
SciFi has the movie 'The Hulk', followed by 'ECW'.
Sundance -
[07:30 AM] The Last Days;
[09:00 AM] Admissions;
[10:30 AM] The Take;
[12:00 PM] It's All About Love;
[01:45 PM] Under Milk Wood;
[03:15 PM] Checkpoint;
[04:45 PM] Ginger and Cinnamon;
[06:30 PM] Kath & Kim - Season 3: Sitting on a Pile;
[07:00 PM] Wallace & Gromit: The Wrong Trousers;
[07:30 PM] Admissions;
[09:00 PM] City of Men - Season 3: Episode 4: Hip Sampa Hop;
[09:30 PM] IN SHORT: Subway;
[10:00 PM] Topsy-Turvy;
[12:45 AM] Things To Do Before You're 30;
[02:30 AM] City of Men - Season 3: Episode 4: Hip Sampa Hop;
[03:00 AM] Wallace & Gromit: The Wrong Trousers;
[03:30 AM] House of Boateng: Episode 8;
[04:00 AM] The Human Behavior Experiments;
[05:00 AM] Under Milk Wood. (ALL TIMES EST)
Former U.S. President Bill Clinton, second from right, stands amidst puppets controlled by tsunami affected children at a rebuilt school at Thazanguda in Cuddalore district, around 165 kilometers (103 miles) south of Chennai, India, Friday, Dec. 1, 2006. Hundreds of villagers lined the streets of a coastal hamlet in the southern Indian state of Tamil Nadu Friday as Clinton, the top U.N. envoy for the tsunami recovery effort, visited homes built to replace those washed away by the 2004 Indian Ocean tsunami. The tsunami destroyed nearly 130 homes in Thazanguda, leaving many of the fishing community's 2,600 residents homeless.
Photo by M.Lakshman
David Letterman isn't going anywhere. CBS Corp. announced Monday that the late-night funnyman has signed a contract to stay on the air until at least 2010. It was widely reported in September that Letterman had agreed to the deal.
The contract means Letterman plans to stay on the air longer than late-night rival Jay Leno. NBC has said that Leno will give way to Conan O'Brien on the "Tonight" show in 2009.
Letterman is expected to make somewhere north of $30 million a year. He's been competing with Leno since 1993, and the NBC comic has had the upper hand in the ratings for the past decade.
Willie Nelson played the "Austin City Limits" pilot in 1974, and when the long-running public television music show unveils its new studio in 2010, he'll be a co-owner of the place.
Nelson and nephew Freddy Fletcher will be partners in the studio and nightclub project with Austin-based majority owner Stratus Properties Inc.
Unofficially dubbed Austin City Limits Studio Theater, the $15 million, 2,000-capacity venue will serve as a soundstage about 40 nights a year when KLRU's "Austin City Limits" tapes. It will transform into a musically diverse House of Blues-style club on other nights.
Comedy Central has ordered "Lil' Bush: Resident of the United States," a cartoon satire that re-imagines resident George W. Bush and key executives in his administration as elementary school misfits.
The title character is surrounded by close pals like Lil' Cheney, who grumbles unintelligibly, and Lil' Condi, who pines for Lil' Bush and does his homework for him.
"Bush" is not without its risque moments. When Lil' Bush's school serves falafel instead of hot dogs for lunch in one episode, he and his pals torture the cafeteria employees with methods made famous during the Abu Ghraib prison scandal.
Renowned Argentinian-Israeli conductor Daniel Barenboim will direct a concert honoring outgoing UN Secretary General Kofi Annan, the Berlin Opera said.
The concert will be held at UN headquarters in New York on December 18, where the orchestra will play works by Mozart and Brahms in honor of Annan, who will leave his post at the end of the month after two consecutive five-year terms.
Composed of 80 young Israeli and Palestinian musicians, the "West-Eastern Divan" was co-founded in 1999 by Barenboim and the late Palestinian-American intellectual Edward Said, to promote peace in the Middle East.
"30 Rock" has been picked up for a full season, bringing the total for Tina Fey's critically praised but low-rated NBC comedy to 22 episodes.
The order for nine additional episodes comes after the show made its first regular telecast in the Thursday 9:30 p.m. slot, and averaged 6 million viewers.
"30 Rock," set behind the scenes of a late-night sketch show, got off to a slow start in its original Wednesday 8 p.m. period, where it averaged 6.4 million viewers.
Paul McCartney's original handwritten working lyrics for the 1968 Beatles song "Maxwell's Silver Hammer" went for $192,000 at Christie's sale of rock and pop memorabilia. The pre-sale estimate had been $200,000 to $300,000.
Jimi Hendrix's guitar, a 1968 Fender Stratocaster with a sunburst finish that was modified to accommodate his left-handed use, sold for a staggering $168,000, well above its pre-sale estimate of $80,000 to $120,000.
A notebook belonging to Neville Garrick, former art director to Bob Marley and the Wailers, containing lyrics in Marley's hand, fetched $72,000, far beyond its estimated $20,000 to $30,000.
Jim Morrison's circa 1970 handwritten poem "The American Night" had an estimate of up to $12,000 but sold for $50,400.
Financial news channel CNBC is retaking its territory on the Internet on Monday, formally ending a relationship with Microsoft Corp.'s MSN Money and relaunching its own Web site.
CNBC ran its own Web site from 1998 to 2001 but began providing online content to Microsoft's MSN portal site under a licensing agreement. The channel's relaunched site will carry many new features, including Web-specific video clips and market updates, video from news events and interviews with CEOs and other newsmakers.
Customers paying fees of $9.95 per month also will have access to premium features including archived video and a live feed of video from the financial news network.
Beverly Hills police said Monday that "Prison Break" actor Lane Garrison was at the wheel of his SUV and had apparently been drinking before it crashed Saturday night, killing a 17-year-old boy and injuring two other teens, one of them critically.
The 26-year-old actor, who suffered minor injuries in the crash, was not immediately arrested, according to McCann, who said the investigation was continuing.
The three passengers were taken to Cedars-Sinai Medical Center, where the 17-year-old boy died. His name was withheld pending notification of relatives.
Audrey L. Wilder, widow of writer/director Billy Wilder, waves as she arrives at the opening of the Billy Wilder theater at the Hammer museum in Los Angeles December 3, 2006.
Photo by Mario Anzuoni
From the end of the world to New Testament beginnings. The authors of the controversial but best-selling apocalyptic "Left Behind" series have gone back in time.
In a new series, Tim LaHaye and Jerry Jenkins take on the four evangelists, starting with the John, the youngest and the one who lived the longest.
The new series is a departure from the "Left Behind" books which now number 12 plus three prequels and a final sequel, cataloging doomsday chaos and world conflict attending the "rapture," the time when many Christians believe the faithful will be swept off the earth and into heaven.
Rip Torn, who was acquitted of drunken-driving charges two years ago in New York City, was arrested again Monday in a city suburb after a collision, state police said.
No one was hurt in the crash in North Salem, Trooper Edward Gillespie said. The 75-year-old character actor refused a sobriety test and would be arraigned on a charge of driving while intoxicated, Gillespie said.
Torn's publicist, Dick Guttman, said from Los Angeles that he had not heard from Torn and could not comment.
Yoko Ono presents the 2006 Turner Prize at the Tate Britain art gallery in London December 4, 2006. German-born artist Tomma Abts became the first woman painter to land the, 25,000 pounds ($49,457), Turner Prize in the 22-year history of one of the art world's most controversial awards for her minimalist canvasses that were lauded by the judges for their rigorous and compelling images.
Photo by Luke MacGregor
A judge agreed Monday to postpone rapper Snoop Dogg's arraignment on a felony possession of a deadly weapon charge until January.
The rapper, whose real name is Cordozar Calvin Broadus, was charged with the felony count after a security screener at John Wayne Airport noticed a collapsible baton in his luggage on Sept. 27. He remains free on $150,000 bail.
Broadus showed up Monday with three bodyguards and his defense attorney, who sought the delay from Superior Court Judge Kazuharu Makino so he could get all the discovery in the case. Broadus also signed a waiver that will allow him to skip most "non-substantive" hearings, said the attorney, Don Etra.
Archaeologists have unearthed what they say are the only existing imperial insignia belonging to Emperor Maxentius - precious objects that were buried to preserve them and keep them from enemies when he was defeated by his rival Constantine.
Excavation under Rome's Palatine Hill near the Colosseum turned up items including three lances and four javelins that experts said are striking for their completeness - digs usually turn up only fragments - and the fact that they are the only known artifacts of their kind.
Some of the objects, which accompanied the emperor during his public appearances, are believed to be the base for the emperor's standards - rectangular or triangular flags, officials said.
An imperial scepter with a carved flower and a globe, and a number of glass spheres, believed to be a symbolic representation of the earth, also were discovered.
ABC's "Grey's Anatomy" and "Lost" were among the five drama nominees, while NBC's "My Name Is Earl" and "The Office" numbered among the five comedy contenders as the Producers Guild of America announced the TV shortlist for its annual awards Monday.
Fox also drew two nominations for the dramas "House" and "24." "The Sopranos" (HBO) rounded out the drama list.
Other comedy nominees were "Curb Your Enthusiasm" (HBO), "Arrested Development" (Fox) and "Weeds" (Showtime).
And in variety TV, the nominees were "The Ellen DeGeneres Show" (Warner Bros. Television), "Late Night with Conan O'Brien" and "The XX Olympic Games: Opening Ceremony" (NBC), "The Late Show with David Letterman" (CBS) and "Real Time with Bill Maher" (HBO).
A man dressed as 'Krampus' (a devil like figure, the companion of St. Nicholas) walks up the streets during a traditional 'Krampus run' in the small Austrian village of Gresten, December 2, 2006. On St. Nikolas day, December 6, the Krampus traditionally punishes children for their bad behaviour during the year, while St. Nikolas brings sweets and small presents.
Photo by Leonhard Foeger
South Korea started a $30 million (15.2 million pound), three-year project on Monday to move the main gate of an ancient royal palace about 15 metres (50 feet) in order to right a wrong it sees as being caused by Japan's colonial occupation.
Workers in downtown Seoul began the delicate process of taking apart and demolishing parts of Kwanghwamoon (brightness) gate, which was moved during Japan's 1910-1945 occupation of the Korean peninsula because it blocked the view from a Japanese administrative office.
The gate, which stands at the end of a main thoroughfare in the capital, was rebuilt by South Korea in 1968, using materials such as concrete, in a spot removed from its original location because of new roads constructed during Japanese rule.
George Clooney's beloved potbelly pig Max has died, Clooney's publicist said. He was 19.
The Oscar-winning actor, 45, who owned the hog for 18 years and reportedly once said the porker was his longest relationship, told USA Today, "I was really surprised, because he's been a big part of my life."
Another Clooney pet - his bulldog Bud - died earlier this year, Rosenfield said.
Ronnie Lippin, a veteran publicist and manager who worked with rock icons such as Eric Clapton, Brian Wilson and Prince, died Monday. She was 59 years old.
Though she got her start working as a publicist for film and stage productions, Lippin, a Brooklyn, N.Y., native, migrated to music publicity when she moved to Los Angeles with her husband, Dick Lippin.
She started out as a chief publicist for MCA Records and later worked with Elton John's Rocket Records and became the top publicist for RSO Records, home of the Bee Gees and the best-selling "Grease" and "Saturday Night Fever" Soundtracks.
In 1989 she joined The Lippin Group, the marketing and public relations firm founded by her husband. There, she represented acts ranging from Mark Knopfler to Clapton to Prince. She also served as a co-manager to Wilson.
Lippin is survived by her husband and a daughter, Alexandra, who also works for The Lippin Group.
The young Wet Panda marches across a tree at the zoo in Munich, southern Germany, Friday, Dec. 1, 2006. The female panda bear was born last June, has spent the last months in the litter box and is now exploring her enclosure. Wet Pandas come from the Himalayan mountains.
Photo by Diether Endlicher
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