Bartcop Entertainment - Tuesday, 1 October, 2002
Tuesday
1 October, 2002
(Updated Daily)
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Issue #22
Disinfotainment Today
By Michael Dare
"All Rights Reserved and All Wrongs Avenged"
ISSUE #22
is brought to you by
The Sixties
BELIEVE IT OR ELSE
Means and Ends
The purpose of the fish trap is to catch fish, and when the fish are caught, the trap is forgotten.
The purpose of the rabbit snare is to catch rabbits. When the rabbits are caught, the snare is forgotten.
The purpose of words is to convey ideas. When the ideas are grasped, the words are forgotten.
Where can I find a man who has forgotten words? He is the one I would like to talk to.
- Chuang Tzu (300 BC) -
But Then Again
Words are what, among the great apes, make us the smartest. We must be careful not to use them in suicidal, genocidal or fratricidal ways. Words are either our friends or our destroyers; they cannot be fair-weather friends, they are one or the other.
So if Saddam should be killed and the Middle East Balkanized and his oil grabbed by the US because they will manage it more benevolently than he does, we should probably SAY this. Plain language always helps, and euphemisms are hardly ever believed. To say we're after him because he has "weapons of mass destruction" (like Israel) and "murders his own people" (like Israel, whose Palestinians parallel his Kurds) and "uses chemical weapons" (like the US napalming the naked little girl in Vietnam) and he's a "barbaric dictator" (like Marcos, Pinochet, Yeltsin, Noriega, Batista, Nasser, Stalin and other former friends of the US; and Adolf Hitler whose rise George Bush's grandfather funded), flaws can arise in one's argument and one can look a fool."
Hypothetical Question of the Week
Imagine for the moment that you have a button in front of you, and if you push the button, every Jew on earth would die. You wouldn't push it, right? No one would, right? Wrong. There are thousands, maybe even millions of people on earth who would push that button, people who actually believe that Jews are to blame for all that is wrong with life on earth. That's why the U.S. is protecting Israel, because if they didn't, the people who would push that button would actually kill all the Jews in Israel.
They're insane, right? Imagine for the moment that you have a button in front of you, and if you push the button, everyone who thinks that every Jew on earth should die, would die. Would you push it?
Best Reason to Eat A
McDonalds Cheeseburger
(if you're pro-globalization)
The 649 anti-globalization protestors who were arrested in Washington D.C. last week were all fed a vegetarian meal after D.C. cops got complaints from activists arrested at previous demonstrations.
I Feel So Much Safer
Now
Last week,
DEA agents armed with automatic weapons raided a hospice on the outskirts of Santa Cruz, California, because it grew and used marijuana for its patients, most of them terminally ill. The founder and director, Valerie Corral, who uses marijuana herself to control debilitating seizures as a result of head trauma following a 1973 car accident, was taken away in her pajamas. Suzanne Pfeil, a paraplegic patient suffering from postpolio syndrome, was told to stand up and then was handcuffed in bed when she could not. All the plants were destroyed.
Bush of the Week
Online Animated Film of the Week
Internet Song of the Week
Due to a lawsuit from Led Zeppelin, every existing copy of Little Roger and the Goosebumps'
Stairway to Gilligan, (the
Theme to Gilligan's Island sung to
Stairway to Heaven) was destroyed. It's hilarious and you can hear it
here. I guess every copy wasn't destroyed.
Perjury of the Week
FBI Director
Robert S. Mueller III told Congress, "The FBI has found no one in the United States who had foreknowledge of the September 11 attacks other than the 19 hijackers."
I Doubt It
According to
this headline, John Lennon himself is going to re-release Mind Games.
Contradiction in Terms of the Week
NATO, which was formed to protect Western Europe from Eastern Europe, has invited seven new countries
from Eastern Europe.
Calling All Criminals
If you're dealing dope and your code words for pot are "extra biscuits," don't work at a
KFC.
Insane E-mail of the Week
Dear citizens of planet earth,
Ladies and gentlemen, let's stop fooling ourselves and call it what it is. This isn't a War on Terrorism or a War in the Mideast. This is World War III. Nuclear weapons are back on the table. The lives of everyone on the planet are at risk. Bush made it clear. It's us vs. them. Everyone in the world must choose sides. You're either with us or against us, and once we let go the leashes of our war machine, if you haven't made it clear you're on our side, prepare to be slaughtered. Us vs. them means many countries vs. many other countries. Why hasn't anyone come right out and said it. It's World War III and millions are about to die. It's a fate accompli. The military industrial complex has taken control of the United States Government and it spells doom for us all.
Please don't blame us. It's not our fault. We didn't vote for him. When Hitler tried to take over the world, at least he could claim correctly that he was voted in. When the world points to America and says "why have you started this war?", we can honestly say "Hey, he lost the election. Don't blame us."
It's not too late to stop it. Our rallying cry must be POSTPONE POSTPONE POSTPONE POSTPONE. If the warhounds can be held back for just another couple years, it will be possible to place the fate of the planet in gentler hands.
But I doubt it. Chances are Bush has already won the next election the same way he won the last one. 2004 is pre-stolen. We're marching on, ladies and gentlemen, and it's going to get bigger before it gets smaller. It doesn't take Nostradamus to figure out that we're going into Iraq again and Saddam Hussein is going to get away again. He and bin Laden will be sharing Mai Tais in the Caymans, collecting their residual checks from the Bush Evil Empire.
Bush is a cross between Pinocchio and Napoleon, a dictator on strings, controlled by puppeteers who make him stick to the script, while giving him just enough rope to occasionally hang himself. If Bush didn't make those stupid gaffs while off-script, the focus might shift from the puppet to the puppeteers. At least Reagan was a GOOD actor.
George Bush ran the world while Reagan was president just as Cheney is running it while Bush is president. Presidents are always front-men for someone else. They're like the Pope or the Queen, a ceremonial dupe who presents a face to the world while others actually do the dirty work.
Our only hope is that he becomes too much of a liability to the forces that be.
Please sign my petition to George Bush asking him to neutralize his son, George W. Bush. If anyone can get away with it, he can.
Dear Dr. Hollywood,
I've always been taught that in a feature, assuming there are between 25-30 scenes total, that the first act should end with the first major turning point around scene 7. However, my script has the first major turning point occurring around scene 15, with a somewhat truncated second and third acts. How important is it to keep my script within conventional scene/act structure?
Thanks,
Christian
Christian,
Thank you for braving time and space to contact me.
When is the last time you didn't like a movie because the first act turning point happened 7 minutes into the picture instead of 15? Doesn't happen. It only bothers academics, not actual moviegoers. Conventional scene/act structure is not only not important, it's actually detrimental to the creation of exciting and vital motion pictures. As far as I'm concerned, all those people teaching the rules of structure are responsible for the total blanding of the filmgoing experience. All MY favorite movies, like Traffic or Pulp Fiction totally explode the traditional rules of structure. Write from your heart.
MD
WHO'S GOING TO HELL THIS WEEK?
September 30, 2002
UNDO THE COUP
CARTOON FROM HELL
STOCK MARKET ADVICE FROM HELL
If you had invested $5,000 in MarketGuide, Inc. last Monday, you would have wound up with $33,200 on Thursday morning.
RESOLUTION FROM HELL
The Bush resolution to the U.N. concerning Iraq is three-and-a-half single-spaced pages. The resolution is seen as unfeasibly harsh and "designed to be rejected," in the words of a
U.N. diplomat.
PARTY GUY FROM HELL
Mohamed Atta footed the bill for himself and two young American girls on what an associate of the two girls later described as a non-stop 3-day drug-and booze-filled romp in Key West in February of 2001,
ANIMAL FROM HELL
It's a zebra.
It's a donkey.
Nope.
HISTORY LESSON FROM HELL
The British and Afghanistan By Denis Mueller
The British interest in Afghanistan stemmed from British worries about the intentions of the Russian Empire. The Russian Empire had expanded to Central Asia and their possible influence of Central Asia concerned the British. The British fleet guarded their prize jewel of India from the ocean but the area was considered vulnerable. While the British prided themselves on the effectiveness of their colonial administration the truth was it was British force that ruled India.
The British were arrogant in their dealings and approached the Afghan situation with relative ignorance. When the emir of Afghanistan toyed with the idea of aligning himself with the Russians the Brits decided he must go. But it was a difficult country to impose order upon. Its economy was weak and poorly developed. In fact, one of its chief sources of income was plunder on the neighboring lands so order was hard to maintain.
Governor-General, Lord Auckland decided to change the regime and he soon found himself in quagmire. In December of 1838, he marched the main British force over 1,000 miles to Kandahar where the troops spent weeks recovering from the march. Then they marched to Kabal and by 1839 had secured their objective.
So the British installed a regime that was friendly to them. All seemed well but the problems of administering a stable government proved difficult. The various tribal chiefs across the vast country refused to cooperate and animosity increased because of British attacks on local chiefs. The wide spread use of Hindu troops also helped to increase tensions.
Finally, the British were attacked by the mobs. They soon lost control of events in Kabal and a British resident Sir Alexander Burnes was murdered. The British hesitated to respond while the numbers of the rebellion increased as tribal chiefs now joined in the fight against the British. In desperation, the British negotiated what they thought was a safe evacuation of the territory. So the 4,500 soldiers and 12,000 camp followers left for Jalalabad.
Within days the situation began to take a turn for the worst. The bitter cold, the ambushes by tribesmen started to take a toll on the convoy. In five days only 500 troops were capable of any action. The remaining troops were attacked at Jagdullak on January 9th; the few who made it through were attacked the next day. Some were taken prisoner but many, including eighteen officers were killed and only one European survived the ordeal.
It is not known just how many died but the total is most likely in the area of 12,000 people. Despite their loses the British maintained 7,500 in Kandahar and were reinforced in 1842. They withstood attacks and soon embarked on punitive missions designed to punish the Afghans. As one officer put it, "every crime, every sin of which human nature can be guilty....are as and notorious as daylight, throughout Afghanistan." The British finally left only to return 30 years later but we will save that story for Tuesday.
Source: Bruce Collins, University of Derby
PRESERVATION FROM HELL
"To run his misnamed Healthy Forests Initiative -- whose real purpose, naturally, is to cut down old-growth trees in the national forests -- Bush has named a man who questions even the existence of ecosystems, as if that were a whimsical option, like believing in the Tooth Fairy or not."
- Tom Teepen -
QUIZ FROM HELL
Which of the following nations possess biological and chemical weapons capable of mass destruction?
a) Iran
b) Iraq
c) Libya
d) North Korea
e) Syria
f) the Sudan
Answer: all of the above.
Which of the following nations possess massive oil fields?
a) Iran
b) Iraq
c) Libya
d) North Korea
e) Syria
f) the Sudan
Answer: b
Which country are we singling out from the rest to attack?
a) Iran
b) Iraq
c) Libya
d) North Korea
e) Syria
f) the Sudan
Answer: b
It will be called...
a) the Great Regime Change
b) the Mid-East War
c) World War III
TOY FROM HELL
The Florida Elections Commission has awarded
Fisher-Price the contract to develop a less confusing balloting system. "It's really quite simple," spokeswoman Liz Holden explained. "All you have to do is turn the pointer towards the candidate of your choice and cast your vote by pulling the string. Then the voice of the candidate comes on and says, for example, "Al Gore says, 'You have voted for me.'"
SATAN DOESN'T WANT YOU TO KNOW
If you get a headache, do exactly what it says on the Aspirin bottle, "take two Aspirin" and "keep away from children."
PAYCHECK FROM HELL
I suppose there's no reason to be surprised by this, but did you know that the guy who works for Microsoft who invented computer Solitaire, probably the most used program in the history of computers, has
never been paid a penny for it?
AND MAY ALL YOUR ACCESS BE UNFETTERED
An Arab Christmas Song
With apologies to Mel Torme
Iraqis roasting on an open fire
War dogs nipping at your feet
Muslim carols being sung by a choir
And folks who'll soon be luncheon meat
Everybody knows a turkey who is president
Will help to make the season blight
Tiny Arabs with their eyes all aglow
Will find it hard to sleep tonight
They know that Bush is on his way
He's loaded lots of guns and ammo on his sleigh
And every mother's child is going to spy
To see if bodies really know how to fly
And so I'm offering this simple phrase
To kids from one to World War Two
Although its been said many times, many ways
Scary Christmas
Scary Christmas
Scary Christmas
To...you
QUOTES FROM HELL
"Remember not only to say the right thing in the right place, but far more difficult still, to leave unsaid the wrong thing at the tempting moment."
- Benjamin Franklin -
"We need an energy bill that encourages consumption."
- George W. Bush -
"Eat me."
- Michael Dare -
"The guy who owns Hooters is making a bid to buy Vanguard Airlines. Hopefully he gets it. What fun that'll be. My tray table won't be the only thing in the upright position."
- Doug Powers -
"One of my goals is to be the most non-competitive woman in the world."
"The only difference between George W. Bush and Napoleon Bonaparte is 10 inches. Like Napoleon, who rearranged the whole map of Europe (he even invented the kingdoms of Holland and Westphalia), Bush wants to turn the Middle East into Texastan, Oklahomabad and Saudi Alaskia -- his own personal filling stations. Like Napoleon, who slowly but surely stripped the constitution of the French Empire of its liberal provisions, Bush wants to -- oh, that's right, he's already doing that here in the United States. At least Napoleon had the good manners to wait until he had himself proclaimed emperor. Bush, well, he has already proclaimed himself Napoleon, so he thinks he gets to do whatever he wants."
"The Democrats on Capitol Hill have so far failed to mount a principled, coherent opposition. I am not shocked by this, are you? One senses they are looking at the whole question merely as a matter of popular positioning: Will they like me if I say take out Saddam? Will they get mad at me if we try to take him out and it's a disaster? Will they like me if I say there's no reason to go to war? Have I focus-grouped this?"
"The U.N. is a place where governments opposed to free speech demand to be heard!"
- Thorn Shunt -
"According to a recent survey, 81 percent of Americans feel they have a book in them -- and that they should write it. As the author of 14 books, with a 15th to be published next spring, I'd like to use this space to do what I can to discourage them. Something on the order of 80,000 books get published in America every year, most of them not needed, not wanted, not in any way remotely necessary. Why add to the schlock pile?"
- Joseph Epstein -
"A black man voting for the Republicans makes about as much sense as a chicken voting for Colonel Sanders."
- JC "Buddy" Watts, Sr. -
"..it does not require a majority to prevail, but rather an irate, tireless
minority keen to set brush fires in people's minds."
- Samuel Adams -
"There are a thousand hacking at the branches of evil to one who is
striking at the root."
- Henry David Thoreau -
""The old will die and the young will forget."
- David Ben-Gurion -
"If George Bush believes in a unilateral preemptive strike against Iraq, why doesn't he change the name of the Department of Defense to the Department of Offense?"
- Art Buchwald -
"All laws which are repugnant to the Constitution are null and void."
- Marbury vs Madison, 5 US (2 Cranch) 137, 174, 176, (1803) -
"Half the harm that is done in this world is due to people who want to feel important."
- TS Eliot -
"We thought because we had power we had wisdom."
- Stephen Benet -
"I have seen war. I have seen war on land and sea. I have seen blood running from the wounded... I have seen the dead in the mud. I have seen cities destroyed... I have seen children starving. I have seen the agony of mothers and wives. I hate war."
- Franklin D. Roosevelt -
"When the rich make war it's the poor that die."
- Jean-Paul Sartre -
"After each war there is a little less democracy to save."
- Brooks Atkinson -
"War is hell."
- General William Tecumseh Sherman -
"War is not nice."
- Barbara Bush -
"I refuse to accept the view that the bright daybreak of peace and brotherhood can never become a reality."
- Martin Luther King Jr. -
"You no good fucking sonofabitch. I will never fucking forget what you
wrote."
- George W. Bush to Al Hunt -
TECHNOLOGY FROM HELL
SITES FROM HELL
Mandatory reading:
Fortunes of war await Bush's circle after attacks on Iraq. Also, The Judicial Accountability Initiative Law (
JAIL) is a proposed amendment to the California Constitution as a check against judicial misconduct and abuse of power.
Peekabooty is software that enables people inside countries where the Web is censored to bypass those censorship measures. The theory behind it is simple: bypass the firewalls by providing an alternate intermediary to the World Wide Web.
Remember that bill that killed Internet radio? There's another bill that postpones implementation for six months. You can
help it pass.
Why do our leaders not hear that music of the spheres? What dark forces, lurking hidden in their innermost beings, prevent them to rise on wings of eagles and lift humanity to Elysian Fields? That is
the question before the American people.
Israel may have withdrawn tanks and troops from Yasir Arafat's wrecked compound in Ramallah, but their
special forces are already operating inside western Iraq to locate missile launchers that could be used against them.
Even if you're pro-choice,
here's an issue where you should be on the side of the anti-abortionists.
Somebody please explain why a
major anti-war speech by the man who won the election gets virtually no media coverage.
Need something to do with your left hand while your right hand is on the mouse? Learn
how to juggle with one hand.
Attention all geniuses. There is absolutely no way to apply for the yearly
genius awards given by the John D. and Catherine T. MacArthur Foundation. They have to find you on their own. Smart.
If you get
these jokes, you are a computer geek.
ISRAEL is working on a
biological weapon that would harm Arabs but not Jews, according to Israeli military and western intelligence sources. The weapon, targeting victims by ethnic origin, is seen as Israel's response to Iraq's threat of chemical and biological attacks. In developing their "ethno-bomb", Israeli scientists are trying to exploit medical advances by identifying distinctive genes carried by some Arabs, then create a genetically modified bacterium or virus.
Funny how stories Internet newshounds knew about almost a year ago are just now making it to the
New York Times. Guess what? There were "lapses in counterterrorism at the C.I.A. and F.B.I. before the Sept. 11 attacks."
Man, stop what you're doing right now and check out
David Copperfield's site. Among other things, he sets your browser on fire.
Ronald Reagan's
memory is gone. How convenient.
A Sentencing Project report shows that the number of women incarcerated for drug offenses rose a breathtaking 888 percent from 1986 through 1996, fueled by the escalating war on drugs. Drug offenses accounted for nearly half of all female convictions. And 80 percent of these female inmates had children. Read more about families whose lives aren't being destroyed by drugs but by
the war on drugs.
If you're thinking of unsubscribing, be sure to click
here.
The most depressing thing about this
groupie site that compares the organ size of hundreds of rock stars is that you've never heard of most of the rock stars.
The world needs more
naked women with fish.
Not getting enough sex?
Here's the answer.
Don't let this happen to you.
dIsInFoTaInMeNt ToDaY archives are
here.
All of Helen's columns are
here.
Dr. Hollywood archives are
here
dIsInFoTaInMeNt ToDaY is free and may be reproduced in any form,
unless you want to buy me an SUV
Acknowledgement
dIsInFoTaInMeNt ToDaY consists of information from dozens of sources, cut up, thrown
in the air, and recycled randomly. It is sent all over the place, so I apologize if you're seeing the same thing twice. If you see a joke, graphic, or news item that came from or through you, thanks, send more, and please accept the fact that much of dIsInFoTaInMeNt ToDaY is unacknowledgeable, and if I sought permission from everyone whose bastardized material showed up here, I'd never get anything else done. Please note that I don't even put my own name on it.
Thanks,
Satan
This newsletter made entirely of recycled electrons.
Many thanks to Michael Dare!
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'TBH Politoons'
Thanks, again, Tim!
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Reader Viewing Suggestion
Re: John O'Neill
On PBS this week - THURSDAY, OCTOBER 3 at 8:00 p.m.
Frontline - "The Man Who Knew"
Frontline presents the story of John O'Neill, an FBI agent who predicted the al-Qaida's devastating attack on America, yet was silenced by bureaucracy. Forced out of the job he loved, O'Neill took a job in the private sector -- as head of security
at the World Trade Center, where he was killed on September 11, 2001.
~~ M-Newman
Thanks, M-N! We should all remember John O'Neill!
(Scroll down)
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Reader Suggestion
from PassItOn
The Ballad of John O'Neill is available on the web.
Plus, there is a nice explanation of why we should care
about John O'Neill.
And the original lyrics.
~ PassItOn
Thanks, PIO. And while on the topic, don't forget
Remember John.
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He's On A Roll!
the worried shrimp
Dysfunction
Mistakes
Thanks, Marc!
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In The Chaos Household
Last Night
Weather has cooled off nicely.
Today's page is way too big to prattle on about BartFest - will pick up the tale on Wednesday's page.
Tonight, Tuesday, CBS has a fresh 'JAG', a fresh 'The Guardian', and a fresh 'Judging Amy'.
Scheduled on a fresh Dave are David Schwimmer and Avril Lavigne.
Scheduled on a fresh Craiggers is Dana Delany.
NBC starts with a fresh 'In-Laws', then the season premiere of 'Just Shoot Me', a fresh 'Frasier', a fresh 'Hidden Hills', and then 'Dateline'.
Scheduled on a fresh Jay are Reese Witherspoon, Zach Braff, and Lifehouse.
Scheduled on a fresh Conan are Anthony Hopkins, David Grier, and Naked Trucker.
Scheduled on a fresh Carson Daly are Damon Wayans and Rhett Miller.
ABC opens with a fresh '8 Simple Rules', then the season premiere of 'Jim', a fresh 'Life With Bonnie', then the series premiere of 'Less Than Perfect', and wraps with a fresh 'NYPD Blue'.
The WB offers a fresh 'Gilmore Girls' and a fresh 'Smallville'.
Faux has Baseball, and is planning on TBA for the rest of the evening.
UPN has a fresh 'Buffy', and a fresh 'Haunted'.
Anyone have any opinions?
Or reviews?
(See below for addresses)
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Big Dog Watch Continues
Bill & Kevin & Chris
Former U.S. President Bill Clinton (R), with movie stars Kevin Spacey (C) and Chris Tucker (L), attends a ceremony to celebrate the partnership between organizations LoveLife and
the Nelson Mandela Foundation, south of Johannesburg September 28, 2002. Clinton is on the last leg of a five nation African visit to promote efforts to fight AIDS and encourage economic development.
Photo by Juda Ngwenya
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#20
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Dems Raise $6 Million
Streisand, Harvey & Manilow
Barbra Streisand fattened the Democrats' war chest for their effort to take back control of Congress, headlining a Hollywood gala that raised some $6 million.
The diva emerged from semiretirement to deliver a nine-song set Sunday night on the stage of the Kodak Theatre, the new home of the Oscars. Celebrities such as
Christian Slater and Julia Louis-Dreyfus rubbed shoulders with top House Democrats including Minority Leader Dick Gephardt and California's Rep. Nancy Pelosi, the minority whip.
A longtime liberal and Hollywood's queen Friend of Bill during the Clinton years, Streisand created a stir last week when she sent Gephardt a forceful letter
urging him to stand up to resident Bush on Iraq and chiding, "It is time for the Democrats to get off the defensive and go on the offensive."
Draped in a sweeping, metallic green gown, she also performed her hit "The Way We Were," with altered lyrics to convey that she missed a Democratic Congress
and administration. Democrats have a one-seat Senate edge, but the GOP holds the House, with 222 Republicans, 210 Democrats and two independents.
"Scattered pictures of the House we left behind," she sang. "Lovely Democratic memories, of the way we were."
Performing alongside Streisand were Barry Manilow, comedian Steve Harvey and the singing group Three Mo' Tenors.
Streisand, Harvey & Manilow
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Hollywood to 'Dubya'
Iraq-A Bye, Baby
The emails are starting to fly. "Call the White House to protest," urged one last week. It had been dispatched by a studio executive to scores of other Hollywood players.
"The Bushies have us marching off to war like so many automatons," protests a TV producer, pausing between sets on his tennis court.
"The anti-war anxiety is mounting," advises a top writer, who's an avowed Republican.
War with Iraq may seem inevitable to the White House, but not to the entertainment community.
Indeed, as Washington heightens its readiness, Hollywood heightens its nervousness. As a result, the post-9/11 amity that's been carefully nurtured between the Bushies and Hollywood has been all but shattered.
For the rest, Iraq-A Bye, Baby
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Raises Money for Charity
Denis Leary
Actor and comedian Denis Leary led a team of celebrities and former Boston Bruins hockey players in raising more than $400,000 during a charity hockey game.
Leary hosted the third annual Celebrity Hat Trick, which pit a team of celebrities, including actors Rick Moranis and Tim Robbins, and Sen. John Kerry, against retired Boston Bruins.
Aerosmith frontman Steven Tyler sang the national anthem and coached the Hollywood team, while Bobby Orr and Derek Sanderson coached the Bruins alumni, which featured
Phil Esposito, Reggie Lemelin and Rick Middleton.
Leary is a Worcester native and a cousin of one the six Worcester firefighters who died in a 1999 warehouse blaze started when a homeless couple knocked over a candle during an argument.
Denis Leary
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Home Movies to See Daylight
Mickey Jones
Home movies aren't supposed to be this cool: footage of Bob Dylan goofing around at Hamlet's castle. The Beatles taking the stage in 1964.
But for more than 30 years, drummer Mickey Jones had those and other 8 mm images sitting in his garage collecting dust. He says he never gave it much thought. Now he is releasing them for the first time.
"I just took my home movie camera to kind of document my trip going around the world," Jones said. "It adds a little bit more texture to the world of Bob Dylan photographs."
Jones, 61, took the movies during his career as a drummer, most famously backing Dylan during his 1966 world tour. It was on that tour that Dylan played electric rock for the
first time, shocking many fans who saw it as selling out. (The band's regular drummer, Levon Helm, apparently got sick of being booed during the U.S. leg of the tour and dropped out.)
The Jones tapes show Dylan and his band — who would later become The Band — on stage, in hotel rooms, taxis and buses, and walking the streets of Europe.
The 91-minute movie, titled "1966 World Tour, The Home Movies," is being sold only on Jones' commercial Web site,
www.1966tourhomemovies.com/ ($19.95 VHS, $24.95 DVD).
Although Dylan is the focus, Jones includes footage of other famous people he met during his career, including the Beatles in never-before-seen shots on stage in Paris in 1964.
Mickey Jones
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In The Kitchen With BartCop & Friends
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Settles Legal Dispute
Courtney Love
Rock music star Courtney Love and Universal Music Group on Monday settled a long-running lawsuit with each side claiming victory in the dispute that highlighted a
battle over contracts between musicians and record labels.
Love, who leads the band Hole and is the widow of Nirvana's late lead singer Kurt Cobain, had vowed not to settle her suit, which was set to be heard in a Los Angeles
courtroom this week, and music stars had hoped it would become a test case through which to air their grievances.
Musicians like the Eagles' Don Henley, through the Recording Artists Coalition, believe record labels routinely fail to pay them millions of dollars in royalties
due to flawed accounting and arcane contract language. Love's case also questioned a California law that says record companies may bind a musician to a contract
for more than the seven-year maximum under current California statutes.
Love, however, said she would fight on by lobbying legislatures and advocating collective bargaining agreements between musicians and record companies.
Courtney Love
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A north-west bound four-engine plane flies past the half moon, leaving its contrails in the clear skies over Frankfurt, Germany, Monday morning, Sept. 30, 2002, as clear early autumn weather prevails
over most parts of Germany with the moon easily visible almost all day.
Photo by Frank Rumpenhorst
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Celebs Join In At Conference
Dalai Lama
Richard Gere and Goldie Hawn joined Buddhist philosophers and Nobel laureates in northern India on Monday at the exile headquarters of the Dalai Lama for a meeting of minds on science and modern ethics.
Hawn and Gere will be observers at the five-day conference. Both are prominent supporters of the Nobel Peace Prize-winning Dalai Lama, the Tibetan spiritual leader who fled his homeland after a failed
uprising against Chinese communist troops who occupied the Himalayan territory in 1951.
The actors also will join Buddhist philosophers, Nobel-winning physicist Steven Chu and other scientists, for the forum on "The Nature of Matter, The Nature of Life."
Held in Dharmsala, 265 miles northwest of New Delhi, the conference aims to bring Tibetan Buddhist and Western scientific perspectives to issues of modern ethics and science. It's part of an ongoing
dialogue — which the Dalai Lama has long encouraged — between Western scientific thought and the analytical tradition of Tibetan Buddhism.
Dalai Lama
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BartCop TV!
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New 'Disney-Style' Park
Sighisoara, Romania
Scary jelly, blood pudding and brains will be on the menu if Romania goes ahead with a Dracula theme park, but critics are more afraid it could spoil the nearby medieval birthplace of "Vlad the Impaler."
Romania plans to build the park near the Transylvanian town of Sighisoara, birthplace of 15th century Romanian Count Vlad Tepes, or Vlad the Impaler, who is thought to have inspired
Irish author Bram Stoker's Gothic novel "Dracula."
The government said on Monday it planned to go ahead with the $30 million Disney-style park despite widespread resistance.
U.N. cultural body UNESCO says the park -- expected to feature a horror castle, a "vampirology" institute and restaurants serving gory dishes -- would kill the medieval
atmosphere of Sighisoara, which dates back to the 13th century.
A Tourism Ministry spokesman told Reuters on Monday the location of the park depended on a study due out next month, rather than UNESCO's views.
Romania Dracula Park
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'Bounty' Relics Sold
Captain William Bligh
Crude but vital artefacts Captain William Bligh used to save his loyal crew in an epic open boat voyage after the 1789 mutiny on the Bounty have been sold at auction.
Several of the key relics, owned by Bligh's descendants living in New Zealand, were bought by Britain's National Maritime Museum and will be seen in public for the first time.
A museum spokesman told Reuters it had managed to buy the coconut the controversial mariner drank from, the bullet he used to weigh out rations and the horn beaker he drank from.
A spokeswoman for auction house Christie's said the coconut sold for 71,700 pounds, the bullet for 38,240 pounds and the beaker for 17,925 pounds.
In total, the busy sale raised 716,223 pounds against a pre-sale estimate of 250,000 pounds.
The rudimentary compass Bligh used to steer his overloaded and nearly foundering dinghy across nearly 4,000 miles of storm-tossed seas from near the island of
Tofura to Timor was sold privately after the auction for 16,730 pounds.
For a different perspective, Captain William Bligh
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Shoe Size Means Nothing!
Myth Dispelled
Despite eons of speculation to the contrary, two British scientists have laid to rest the idea that a man's shoe size is in any way correlated to the size of his penis.
Their scientific study found no link between the two variables, according to a report in the British Journal of Urology International.
In the current study, the researchers studied men visiting a urologist for various reasons. Because it wasn't feasible to measure the length of the erect penis, the researchers measured the penis when gently stretched.
In all, 104 men had their penis measured and had their shoe size recorded.
For more details, Myth Dispelled
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Tour of Spain
Bull!
A pack of cyclists ride past a roadside image of a Spanish fighting bull outside Benavente during the the 90-mile Tour of Spain cycling race, Sept. 25, 2002.
Photo by Denis Doyle
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'The Osbournes'
Updated! 'The Osbournes' ~ Page 3
'The Osbournes' ~ Page 2
'The Osbournes' ~ Page 1
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#6
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