Evan V. Symon, Noel Hutchinson, Luke Jenkins: 5 Reasons Ballet Turns Your Life Into A Horror Film (Cracked)
Ballet for amateurs is sort of like whistling. It's fun for a little while, but we all generally accept that it's not something you should get too serious about. If you do delve too deeply, however, you'll find that it's a grueling contest even NFL linebackers couldn't endure. That's why we at Cracked spoke to two competitive whistlers about the blasted hellscape that is the whistl- hmm, what's that? This is supposed to be about ballet? Oh. OK. That could be cool, too. Let's speak to Noel Hutchinson, a dancer in Wisconsin, and Luke Jenkins, a dancer in Virginia, instead ...
Rich Barrett: 8 Memorable Comics Screw-Ups (Mental Floss)
Mistakes happen. Sometimes those mistakes end up in print with a distribution in the hundreds of thousands. Here are some classic screw-ups, printing errors, and unfortunate coincidences that have graced the pages of comic books and newspaper strips over the years.
Who Said It: Donald Trump Or Lucille Bluth? (BuzzFeed)
These two seem to have a lot in common. ("Lucille, if you don't recognize the name, was the hysterically funny alcoholic matriarch on 'Arrested Development.'" - Andrew Tobias)
One of the longest-running primetime dramas on U.S. television, this series set in a cul-de-sac was a spin-off of Dallas. What is the name of this program?
Knots Landing is an American primetime television soap opera that aired from December 27, 1979, to May 13, 1993, on CBS. A spin-off of Dallas, it was set in a fictitious coastal suburb of Los Angeles, and centered on the lives of four married couples living in a cul-de-sac, Seaview Circle. By the time of its conclusion, Knots Landing had become one of the longest-running primetime dramas on U.S. television after Gunsmoke and Bonanza.
Source
Lois Of The Night In Oregon was first, and correct, with:
Cheated like a mad dog, I did! Google sez the answer is "Knott's Landing" a famous long running show I NEVER once watched. Maybe it was on opposite "Falcon's Crest", which I DID watch! What a wonderful show THAT was! It had everything! Ronnie Raygun's ex-wife and so much man-meat-eye-candy: Fernando's kid and Quentin's Ghost! Oh my throbbing pubescence, what memories!
Deborah responded:
There was a period of time when I didn't have a television, so I'm going to take a WAG here - was the show "Knot's Landing"?
Finally cool and breezy, A huge fire north of Napa broke out Saturday and the ash that's blown our way is frightening. Damn, I wish it would rain.
Best wishes to all celebrating Rosh Hoshanna.
Dale of Smoke Bucket Springs, Norcali replied:
Knots Landing was a spin-off of Dallas that I never watched. It aired from December of 1979 to May of 1993. My gaze never caught it, so I have no opinion of it. At that period of time, I was travelling a lot of coke/crank /alcohol road trips as a service engineer for a food machinery company. Long, long hours to work more overtime to make more money to purchase more fuel to work more overtime…etc…awaiting the inauguration of Ronald the Great!
Burning Norcali update: Upon leaving my office on Saturday I noticed that there was another fire started over in the Lake/Napa County…The Valley fire…By Sunday morning 18000 acres…today 61,000 acres and 5% containment. The Butte fire is as of today: 65,000 acres with @ 35 % containment….And it is a lot smoky!!!
George said:
Marty, as one who favored "Dallas" - that is, the television series, back in the early eighties, I believe the spin-off series was titled, "Knots Landing".
MAM wrote:
KNOTS LANDING (79-93) ~ Followed characters originally introduced in "Dallas," living on a cul-de-sac in Knots Landing, California. The show ran for 14 seasons.
Joe S answered:
I have no idea. I never watched Dallas, so I'm fairly certain I never watched a spin-off of Dallas.
By-the-way, what does Jonathan Jones know? Nothing about Terry Pratchett, that's for sure.
Patriot Act NSA Spying Unconstitutional Section 215 National Security Letters Must End
My name is Marc Perkel and I have decided to announce that I will not comply with the so called "Patriot Act" laws requiring me to disclose information about my customers. If I receive a national security letter I will immediately photograph it, post it online everywhere I can, and then make a video of me burning it. I will then await my arrest. If you want to put me in jail then come get me mother fucker.
CBS begins the night with a FRESH'Big Brother', followed by a FRESH'Zoo', then a RERUN'NCIS: The 3rd One'.
Scheduled on a FRESHStephen Colbert are Jake Gyllenhaal, Tim Cook, and Run the Jewels with TV on the Radio.
Scheduled on a FRESHJames Corden, OBE, are Pauley Perrette and Alice Cooper.
NBC starts the night with a FRESH'America's Got Talent', followed by a FRESH'Best Time Ever With Neil Patrick Harris'.
Scheduled on a FRESHJimmy Fallon are Robert De Niro, Ariana Grande, and Duran Duran.
Scheduled on a FRESHSeth Meyers are Josh Brolin, Gov. Martin O'Malley, Judd Winick, and Abe Laboriel Jr.
Scheduled on a FRESHCarson 'The Scab' Daly are Richard Rawlings, NOFX, and Aya Cash.
ABC opens the night with a RERUN'Fresh Off The Boat', followed by another RERUN'Fresh Off The Boat', then a FRESH'Dancing With The Stars'.
Scheduled on a FRESHJimmy Kimmel are John Stamos, Jake Tapper, and Cold War Kids.
The CW offers a RERUN'The Flash', followed by another RERUN'The Flash'.
Faux fills the night with the movie 'Scary Movie'.
MY has 'TMZ Live', followed by 'Hollywood Today Live'.
A&E has 'Storage Wars', followed by a FRESH'Storage Wars: Behind The Locker', and another 'Storage Wars'.
AMC offers the movie 'Tombstone', followed by the movie 'Batman Begins'.
BBC -
[6:00AM] Cash in the Attic - Season 18 - Ep 27 - Hawes
[7:00AM] Cash in the Attic - Season 18 - Ep 28 - Cripps
[8:00AM] Ramsay's Kitchen Nightmares UK - Season 3 - Ep 2 - The Fenwick Arms
[9:00AM] Ramsay's Kitchen Nightmares US - Season 6 - Ep 6 - Olde Hitching Post Restaurant & Tavern
[10:00AM] Doctor Who - Season 6 - Ep 1 - The Impossible Astronaut
[11:00AM] Doctor Who - Season 6 - Ep 2 - Day of the Moon
[12:00PM] Star Trek: The Next Generation - Season 6 - Ep 13 - Aquiel
[1:00PM] Star Trek: The Next Generation - Season 6 - Ep 14 - Face of the Enemy
[2:00PM] Planet Earth: Africa-Ep 1 - Kalahari
[3:00PM] Planet Earth: Africa-Ep 2 - Savannah
[4:00PM] Man vs. Wild - Season 3 - Ep 4 - South Dakota
[5:00PM] Man vs. Wild - Season 3 - Ep 5 - Yukon
[6:00PM] Man vs. Wild - Season 2 - Ep 5 - Patagonia (Part 1)
[7:00PM] Man vs. Wild - Season 2 - Ep 6 - Andes Adventure (Part 2)
[8:00PM] Man vs. Wild - Season 4 NEW - Ep 1 - Alabama
[9:00PM] Man vs. Wild - Season 4 NEW - Ep 2 - Arctic Circle
[10:00PM] Man vs. Wild - Season 4 NEW - Ep 3 - Vietnam
[11:00PM] Man vs. Wild - Season 3 - Ep 7 - Turkey
[12:00AM] Man vs. Wild - Season 3 - Ep 8 - Belize
[1:00AM] Man vs. Wild - Season 3 - Ep 9 - Dominican Republic
[2:00AM] Man vs. Wild - Season 3 - Ep 10 - Oregon
[3:00AM] Man vs. Wild - Season 4 - Ep 1 - Alabama
[4:00AM] Man vs. Wild - Season 4 - Ep 2 - Arctic Circle
[5:00AM] Man vs. Wild - Season 4-Season 4 - Ep 3 - Vietnam (ALL TIMES EST)
Bravo has 'Real Housewives Of OC', another 'Real Housewives Of OC', followed by a FRESH'Below Deck', then a FRESH'My Fab 40th', followed by a FRESH'Watch What Happens Live'.
Comedy Central has 3 hours of old 'Tosh.0', followed by a FRESH'Tosh.0', then a FRESH'Drunk History'.
@Midnight are Nikki Glaser, Nick Swardson, Kyle Kinane.
FX has the movie 'Iron Man 3', followed by the SERIES PREMIERE'The Bastard Executioner'.
History has 2½ hours of old 'Counting Cars', followed by a FRESH'Counting Cars', then a FRESH'Outlaw Chronicles: Hells Angels'.
IFC -
[6:00AM] DOCUMENTARY NOW!-SANDY PASSAGE
[6:30AM] COMEDY BANG! BANG!-RANDALL PARK WEARS BROWN DRESS SHOES WITH BLUE SOCKS
[7:00AM] HARD RAIN
[9:15AM] THE JACKAL
[12:00PM] LETHAL WEAPON 2
[2:30PM] LETHAL WEAPON 3
[5:15PM] LETHAL WEAPON 4
[8:00PM] TRANSPORTER 3
[10:15PM] NOTORIOUS
[1:00AM] LETHAL WEAPON 4
[3:45AM] WONDERLAND
[5:45AM] COMEDY BANG! BANG!-DAVID CROSS WEARS A RED POLO SHIRT AND BROWN SHOES WITH RED LACES (ALL TIMES EST)
Sundance -
[7:15AM] Buried
[9:15AM] Amistad
[12:30PM] The Natural
[3:30PM] Proof of Life
[6:30PM] High Plains Drifter
[9:00PM] The Quick and the Dead
[11:30PM] The Professional
[2:00AM] Close Up With The Hollywood Reporter-Reality
[3:00AM] American Psycho
[5:15AM] Single White Female (ALL TIMES EST)
SyFy has the movie 'Secret Window', followed by a FRESH'Face Off', and another 'Face Off'.
TBS:
Scheduled on a FRESHConan are Paul Bettany, David Drew Howe & Pam Howe, and Nathaniel Rateliff & the Night Sweats.
Michael Keaton arrives on the red carpet for the film "Spotlight" during the 40th Toronto International Film Festival (TIFF) in Toronto, Canada, September 14, 2015. TIFF runs from September 10-20.
Photo by Mark Blinc
Copyright holders must consider "fair use" before demanding the removal of videos that people post online, including on Google Inc's YouTube, a U.S. appeals court ruled on Monday.
In a closely followed case over a home video of a toddler dancing to the Prince hit "Let's Go Crazy," the 9th U.S. Circuit Court of Appeals in San Francisco made it tougher for content providers such as Vivendi SA's Universal Music Group to force Internet service providers to remove material.
"Copyright holders cannot shirk their duty to consider - in good faith and prior to sending a takedown notification - whether allegedly infringing material constitutes fair use," Circuit Judge Richard Tallman wrote for a 3-0 panel.
The decision could make it harder for copyright holders to remove alleged infringing content from the Internet by invoking the federal Digital Millennium Copyright Act, a 1998 law intended to curb movie and music piracy online. Critics say abusive takedown notices can suppress free speech.
Corynne McSherry, a lawyer with the Electronic Frontier Foundation representing Lenz, said the decision "sends a strong message that copyright law does not authorize thoughtless censorship of lawful speech."
Rossif Sutherland, center, poses for photographers on the red carpet alongside Celina Sinden, left, and Donald Sutherland during the gala for the film "Hyena Road" at the 2015 Toronto International Film Festival on Monday, Sept. 14, 2015.
Photo by Frank Gunn
Over 800 items owned by Ringo Starr and his wife, Barbara Bach, are going to auction, including rare Beatles memorabilia like his three-piece drum kit used in over 200 performances and a Rickenbacker guitar known as the "Beatle-Backer" that John Lennon owned and later gave to Ringo.
The unprecedented number of Beatles-owned objects will be offered Dec. 4-5 at Julien's Auctions in Beverly Hills, California.
"We have so much stuff and a lot of it we haven't seen in 20 to 30 years," Starr, 75, said in an exclusive phone interview with The Associated Press from his London apartment.
He said the idea for the auction came after The Grammy Museum in Los Angeles asked to do an exhibition about his life and music in 2013-2014.
Julien's anticipates the sale could top $5 million-$10 million.
All the medical records of the female serial killer who inspired the play and film "Arsenic and Old Lace" will remain sealed forever, Connecticut's Supreme Court ruled on Monday, rejecting a request to open some of them half a century after her death.
A Connecticut journalist planning a book on Amy Archer Gilligan, who was sentenced to life in prison in 1919 after admitting to poisoning one of her husbands as well as a resident of a nursing home where she worked by putting arsenic in their food, had requested the release of the documents.
Gilligan died in 1962 at age 93 in a state psychiatric hospital.
The journalist, Rob Robillard, had asked the court to order the release of all her records. The state's Freedom of Information Commission had asked for a compromise solution: releasing dental and medical records but keeping the psychiatric records private.
Gilligan's story inspired a 1941 stage play and a 1944 movie starring Cary Grant that was a fictional account of a man who learns his two maiden aunts like to kill old men and bury their remains in their basement.
Actor Mark Ruffalo flashes the peace sign as he arrives on the red carpet for the film "Spotlight" during the 2015 Toronto International Film Festival on Monday, Sept. 14, 2015.
Photo by Darren Calabrese
An extensive archive from comedian Jerry Lewis' career, including rarely seen films, long-lost TV recordings and home videos, will have a new home at the Library of Congress, curators announced Monday.
The collection includes thousands of documents and recordings. Lewis is donating some items, while others are being purchased by the library from his personal archive. Some materials will be available immediately to researchers in Washington.
The archive chronicles Lewis' more than 70 years in comedy. Conservators said the recordings will fill significant gaps in TV history, including Lewis' appearances with Dean Martin on NBC's "Colgate Comedy Hour" and on "The Tonight Show." The network reused video tape and recorded over many shows until the 1970s. Many recordings from the 1950s and 1960s don't exist elsewhere, said Mike Mashon, head of the library's moving image section.
The recordings and materials will join the library's existing comedy collection documenting humorists including Bob Hope, Groucho Marx, Lucille Ball, Desi Arnaz, and Johnny Carson.
The Navy agreed to limit its use of sonar and other training that inadvertently harms whales, dolphins and other marine mammals off Hawaii and California in a settlement with environmental groups approved Monday.
A centerpiece of the agreement signed by a federal judge in Honolulu includes limits or bans on mid-frequency active sonar and explosives in specified areas around the Hawaiian Islands and Southern California, Earthjustice attorney David Henkin said.
Sonar at a great distance can disrupt feeding and communication of marine mammals, and it can cause deafness or death at a closer distance, Henkin said.
In some cases, training exercises can kill. Four dolphins died in 2011 in San Diego when they got too close to an explosives training exercise, he said.
Under the agreement, the Navy cannot use sonar in Southern California habitat for beaked whales between Santa Catalina Island and San Nicolas Island. Sonar also is not allowed in blue whale feeding areas near San Diego, according to the environmental groups.
Director Rob Reiner attends a photo call for "Being Charlie" on day 5 of the Toronto International Film Festival at the Winter Garden Theatre on Monday, Sept. 14, 2015, in Toronto.
Photo by Evan Agostini
Two Republican lawmakers whom a park ranger cited for making out in a public park apologized Monday for accusing that ranger of lying and stepped down from a Minnesota House ethics panel in an apparent effort to head off a complaint from Democrats.
In separate statements, Reps. Tara Mack and Tim Kelly made little reference to the Aug. 25 incident in which a Dakota County park ranger said he found the pair making out in a car. The ranger wrote in his notes that Mack's pants were unzipped and pulled down.
Mack and Kelly - who are married to other people - originally called the officer's account "an absolute lie," insisting they met in Lebanon Hills Regional Park in Eagan to swap documents relating to a health insurance company. They vowed to lodge a formal complaint against the ranger.
They later backed down from that promised complaint and each paid $260 misdemeanor fines - actions the House Democrats said amounted to admissions of guilt.
After speaking with Republican House Speaker Kurt Daudt over the weekend, Mack and Kelly issued carefully parsed apologies Monday - not directed toward the park ranger who cited them, but to law enforcement in general.
The snowpack in California's Sierra Nevada mountains probably shrank to the lowest in 500 years this year and climate change may cause further declines, worsening water shortages in the drought-stricken state, a U.S. study said on Monday.
The snowpack in the mountain range this spring was just 5 percent of the average in the second half of the 20th century and scientists said the findings indicated "the 2015 low is unprecedented in the context of the past 500 years."
The low was based on records of snowfall and temperatures inferred from annual growth rings of blue oaks and other trees, meaning some uncertainties about extremes in past centuries.
The record low was an "ominous sign" of the severity of a record drought in the state since 2012 that is affecting everything from agriculture to hydropower generation, the scientists wrote in the journal Nature Climate Change.
Christopher Walken attends the world premiere for "The Family Fang" on day 5 of the Toronto International Film Festival at Winter Garden Theatre on Monday, Sept. 14, 2015, in Toronto.
Photo by Tony Felgueiras
The Dalai Lama said on Monday more research was needed to settle the fate of the man he named as the Panchen Lama, the second-highest figure in Tibetan Buddhism, who vanished two decades ago but is said by the Chinese to be living a normal life.
Gendun Choekyi Nyima, now 26, disappeared shortly after he was declared by the exiled spiritual leader of Tibet to be the reincarnation of the Panchen Lama when he was six years old.
A senior Chinese official said earlier this month Gendun Choekyi Nyima was "being educated, growing up healthily and does not want to be disturbed".
The Chinese Communist Party has long maintained that Gendun Choekyi Nyima is not the real Panchen Lama, and in 1995, the government selected Gyaltsen Norbu as the 11th Panchen Lama.
The Chinese government sees the appointment of the next Dalai Lama as key to consolidating state control over Tibet, where separatist movements have flared since the 1950s, and to undermining the present Dalai Lama's influence.
Pope Francis on Monday told congregations which run hotels and restaurants to pay their taxes "like everyone else", weighing in on a heated debate in Italy over Church privileges.
In an interview with Portuguese Catholic broadcaster Renascenca, the Argentine returned to one of his favourite topics, the need to "fight the temptation of the 'God of money', into which religious congregations often fall."
He scolded those in the hospitality business who continue to benefit from a legal loophole for religious establishments.
The Italian church began paying taxes on profit-making buildings in 2013, but many critics say congregations are still avoiding shelling out by claiming sites are not purely for commercial use -- for example, because they include a chapel.
Its portfolio is huge: the Italian church owns at least 100,000 buildings, including thousands of schools, universities, private clinics, retirement homes, hotels, restaurants and sports centres.
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