'Best of TBH Politoons'
PURPLE GENE'S WEIRD WORD OF THE WEEK
DIGAMY
"DIGAMY"
ON LINE DEFINITION: A second marriage after the death of a previous spouse.
ON THE STREET: Killing your first wife to marry the new babe.
IN A SENTENCE: Go ahead and call me a "Digamist"...at least I ain't a "Bigamist"!
(Read BartCop Entertainment and learn a useless new word each Tuesday)
Reader Comment
RE: Stan Lee's Harpies
Dear Purple Gene:
I kind of enjoyed your review of "Stan Lee's Harpies." It's always fun to bash on a Baldwin; heck, in the South Park movie, Parker and Stone had the Canadians bomb them. However...
...whose name is at the top of the title of the movie?
One of the greatest tragedies I've seen in pop culture is what Stan Lee has become. A number of years ago, I remember seeing him on a revival of "To Tell the Truth." Anyone who ever listened to Lee's narration would have known him from the two "impostors" with him. It's not like he ever kept a "secret identity" in public.
A few years later, I saw him in person at San Diego's Comic-Con International. He was promoting the awful animated series "Stripperella" that he was doing with Pamela Anderson. Anderson didn't show up, claiming hepatitis (from what, we all wondered?) but it didn't matter. If she wouldn't spend time with us sweaty, nerdy geeks, Stan the Man would.
And he did. At the panel, he had the writers, artists and producers of his series. I think they each got about half a sentence out. Everything else was Stan the Man talking, hyping the series, giving his philosophy. They didn't even have a still picture of the drawing of Stripperella, supposedly modeled after Anderson, available in the panel. Forget having some actual animated footage.
It was then that I realized who Stan Lee was. He was Muhammed Ali.
Remember the last fights Ali was in? He was convinced to go into the ring, to get the crap beaten out of him, at an age when a sane fighter would have retired. He still felt he had something to prove. He couldn't retire or step out of the spotlight. He had to hang on, no matter how much it hurt or how sad he looked.
That's what Lee has done. He's accomplished more than any twenty of us mortals ever will in our lifetimes. He co-created Spider-Man, the Fantastic Four, and many other characters (you can argue how much or little he really did, but he did contribute). He used himself and his wacky outgoing personality to publicize Marvel Comics, and made a little nothing comics company a household name, often overtaking industry leader DC.
Ever since Marvel dropped his exclusive contract, he has been trying to prove he's still the creative force he was back in the 1960's. He became the front man for a company called Stan Lee Media, even though the financial head behind the company was a crook currently serving a term in prison for defrauding the public. Lee also got involved in a very bad web comic called "7th Portal," for which he contributed his voice as well as simplistic characters and scripts. He even "re-imagined" Superman, Batman and other DC characters in a poor-selling comic line called "Stan Lee...Just Imagine."
Lee doesn't need to prove anything to anybody, especially not to himself. By shilling himself out to these lousy projects - which look as if they were written in another century, the 20th - he's hurting his reputation. If I had his (presumed) financial security and reputation, I'd be happy just doing cameo appearances in Marvel-based live action movies or in odd places like NBC's "Heroes."
Tom
Get the info on cartoons, anime, comics and more
at toonmag.com
And check out The Cartoon Geeks podcast there too!
Thanks, Tom!
Recommended Reading
from Bruce
RICK PERLSTEIN: Will the Progressive Majority Emerge? (thenation.com)
Very recently, among progressives, a new dictum has emerged: Hug close to the polls, worship the polls, be the polls.
Felice Prager: The 100 "Best" High Schools in America - The View from the Litter Box (irascibleprofessor.com)
... since the release of the Cat Challenge List, my cats have been hiding under beds. They are depressed and embarrassed because their score was too low to make the list.
JEANNINE AVERSA: Many in U.S. don't have bank accounts (Associated Press)
Grandma stuffing money under the mattress isn't the only one living outside the banking system.
10 Ways to Green Your Spending (livescience.com)
Everything we consume, buy, or use impacts the environment; more pointedly, as bestselling food author and Small Planet Institute co-founder Anna Lappe once mused, every time you fork over your cash, you're casting a vote for the kind of world you want.
Robert Frank: Paris Hilton syndrome and how to avoid it (entertainment.timesonline.co.uk)
The one problem the super-rich can't solve with money? What to do with their messed up kids.
Beth Quinn: Vacation means never having to say you're busy (recordonline.com)
My idea of a great vacation is kind of like checking myself into a rest home for the infirm. That's what I did last week.
Ruth Marcus: Mystery Of the Girl Sleuth (washingtonpost.com)
Among my many failings as a parent has been my inability to convince my daughters to read Nancy Drew.
Nina Reviews
'Knocked Up'
As I write this, I'm listening to my perfectly-pirated copy of the movie
"Knocked Up". I just learned how to download movies a few weeks ago, but I
won't do it again, because I've discovered the real reason why downloading
and
watching pirated movies is a bad idea.
I downloaded my copy of "Knocked Up" about two weeks ago, but only watched
about a third of it, though I wanted to see more. I would have watched the
whole thing and probably not seen it in the theater, but a friend of mine was
really down and needed a comedy. When "Knocked Up" came out, it was not only
the best reviewed comedy, it was pretty much the only comedy out.
So I disciplined myself (rare) and went out to see the movie yesterday
with my
friend. In my opinion, it was even better than it's reviews. It's actually
extraordinary, and I felt that many of the (positive) reviewers didn't
quite "get" why it's so good.
I enjoyed the movie so much, I went to watch my pirated copy - now with
pride,
because I had paid my share.
When I got to the final act, I discovered that about 10-20 minutes had been
cut out of the movie.
The way downloading works (usually), is that first-run movies arrive on the
boards and search engines in the form of several (sometimes as many as 52)
archived files. The files usually take about three times as long to download
as a compressed or (re-packed) file - as long as three days for some.
Because everyone wants to see a popular first-run movie, these are the files
most likely to require some sort of "key" to un-archive and view, which may
come from an invite-only board, cost money, or just not exist. Even worse,
they're most likely to contain porn instead, viruses in the form of trojans,
or just a really crappy, out-of-sync, or otherwise unwatchable copy.
Consequently, most folks wait for some "kind soul" to download the archives,
wade through the crap, and re-pack the archives into more easily downloadable
files. These files quickly become the most popular, and the popularity
attracts more and more downloaders. Thus the file spreads quickly to
thousands of people.
Whoever re-packed the copy of "Knocked Up" has unclear motives for doing what
they did. Perhaps it was a matter of fitting the longer movie into the
smaller file - perhaps it was sparing us the "icky parts". The movie as it
stands is still funny, and it still looks like it's probably the complete
movie with maybe a minute or two missing, but it's a different movie with a
different message.
The thousands of people who saw this version may never know, for example,
just
how much Ben did and how much he grew during the birth. They may assume, as
this trite new ending shows, that giving birth is easy, and automatically
changes everything. Perhaps they'll just assume, as one reviewer did, that
Debbie's just a "crazy bitch". They'll never even get to see the sweet,
touching, credits.
I came to downloading movies from downloading music for years. I download
music because I feel the music industry is grossly corrupt, screws artists
over financially, doesn't give artists creative control, and will drop good
artists like a bad habit if they don't turn a profit. It's not that I'm
against the artists - I still do my best to support the artists I find and
enjoy more directly - I just want the whole music industry to collapse.
This is different. This is taking someone's cultural product and deciding
what
stays and what goes. Movies aren't as fluid as music - a minute lost, for
example, from the ending of the Blair Witch Project turns that movie (whether
you liked it or hated it) into something that just doesn't make sense.
I'm sure the folks who made "Knocked Up" know it's being pirated. Do they
care
at this point? I don't know. But I'm pretty sure they would freak the hell
out
if they knew that THIS version was (and is) currently the most popular on the
internet.
So that's it. I'm not doing it again, because I'll never be able to trust
that
a movie I download is the author's true cultural product. It's not fair, and
it's not worth it. What's even worse is that thousands - maybe millions - of
people have seen this crappy version of a great movie and will never "get
it".
I just won't participate in that. The ticket prices still suck, and I hate
the
movie industry, but compared to this it's just not that bad to cough up the
dough sometimes.
"Look at the sky. We are not alone. The whole universe is friendly to us and
conspires only to give the best to those who dream and work." - Abdul Kasam
Thanks, Nina!
That kinda reminds me of the 'Seinfeld' episode where Jerry pirated a movie, then Elaine taped herself dancing in the middle of it. At the end of the episode,
the entire neighborhood (who must have seen the same the pirated version) mocks her bad dancing.
Contributor Comment
RE: Purple Gene's Review of Harpies
Oh, he's so right! Great review, Gene. (Or may I call you Purple?)
I don't remember seeing a PG review of Dark Storm, another
unspeakably bad Stephen Baldwin movie that was shown on Sci Fi a few
weeks ago. I'm not sure which of the two is worse, but I lean
slightly toward Harpies. Or maybe that's just because I saw it more
recently. If PG hasn't reviewed Dark Storm, I wish he would.
David Dvorkin
Blog
Thanks, David!
Reader Suggestion
Future Tech
Hey, Marty!
This site is so awesome I went completely OCD and didn't sleep all night dreaming of the possibility of actually having my own home! Check it out!
Purple Gene Reviews
'Love Me, Love My Doll'
Selected Readings
from that Mad Cat, JD
In The Chaos Household
Last Night
Still sunny and pleasant.
Silent Protest
Online Webcasters
Dozens of online music broadcasters will go silent on Tuesday to protest a new set of royalty rates that many smaller companies say would put them out of business.
Viacom Inc.'s MTV, Live365, Pandora, AccuRadio and several public radio stations including KCRW in Los Angeles and others will observe the day of silence and encourage listeners to support a bill in Congress that would roll back the new rates. The stoppage applies to ad-supported music streams, not to paid subscription ones.
The new royalties were decided by a panel of three copyright judges in early May, and the first payments are due on July 15. Unlike previous arrangements, which expired in late 2005, no breaks were given to smaller online-only broadcasters as they build their businesses.
Online Webcasters
'Surprise' LA Concert
Paul McCartney
Paul McCartney will play a "surprise" concert at a Los Angeles record store on Wednesday, a spokesman said.
The former Beatle, whose new album enjoyed a strong start on the pop charts earlier this month, will perform at Amoeba Records in Hollywood about 7:30 p.m. PDT.
In lieu of launching a full-scale concert tour to promote "Memory Almost Full," McCartney is playing a few hastily arranged free shows in small venues.
Paul McCartney
Switches Venues In South Africa
Live Earth
Organizers of the South African leg of the Live Earth concerts have arranged a new venue in a bid to stimulate lagging ticket sales.
The July 7 show, which is being headlined by U.K. singer Joss Stone, along with Senegal's Baaba Maal, Benin's Angelique Kidjo and reggae band UB40, will be staged in Johannesburg's 18,000-capacity Coca-Cola Dome
It was previously set for Maropeng, a 45-minute drive outside the city. Sources said the lack of public transport hindered sales. Tickets are priced at 250 rand ($35); by contrast, prices for the U.S. show near New York City start at $53 and go up to $348 (before fees)
Live Earth
German Military Site Ban
Tom Cruise
Germany has barred the makers of a movie about a plot to kill Adolf Hitler from filming at German military sites because its star Tom Cruise is a Scientologist, the Defense Ministry said on Monday.
Cruise, also one of the film's producers, is a member of the Church of Scientology which the German government does not recognize as a church. Berlin says it masquerades as a religion to make money, a charge Scientology leaders reject.
The U.S. actor has been cast as Colonel Claus von Stauffenberg, leader of the unsuccessful attempt to assassinate the Nazi dictator in July 1944 with a bomb hidden in a briefcase.
Defense Ministry spokesman Harald Kammerbauer said the film makers "will not be allowed to film at German military sites if Count Stauffenberg is played by Tom Cruise, who has publicly professed to being a member of the Scientology cult".
Tom Cruise
Voted Most Irritating Song Ever
'You're Beautiful'
James Blunt's multimillion-selling ballad "You're Beautiful" has been voted the most irritating song of all time.
The full top 10 for OnePoll's Most Irritating Song of All Time is as follows:
1. "You're Beautiful" - James Blunt
2. "Axel F" - Crazy Frog
3. "MMMBop" - Hanson
4. "Mr. Blobby" - Mr. Blobby
5. "Birdie Song" - The Tweets
6. "Shout" - Lulu
7. "Agadoo" - Black Lace
8. "Grace Kelly" - Mika
9. "My Heart Will Go On" - Celine Dion
10. "Macarena" - Los Del Rio
'You're Beautiful'
Cousin Donates Family Files
Anne Frank
Anne Frank's cousin on Monday donated thousands of letters, photographs and documents that archivists say will reveal details about the background of the teenage diarist who became a symbol of the Holocaust.
Bernhard "Buddy" Elias, 82, had kept the materials for decades in his Swiss attic before permanently loaning them to the Anne Frank House - the museum incorporating the tiny apartment where the family hid during the Nazi occupation of the Netherlands - to mark Monday's 60th anniversary of the first publication of The Diary of Anne Frank.
The donation includes Otto Frank's 1945 letter informing his mother in Switzerland that his daughters Anne and Margo and his wife Edith died in Nazi concentration camps, the letter his mother wrote responding to diary excerpts that Otto sent her, and photographs from the late 1890s of the Frank family in their native Frankfurt, Germany.
Anne Frank
Suffers Professional Injury
Takeru "Tsunami" Kobayashi
A Japanese man who set a world record by wolfing down dozens of hot dogs within minutes has suffered a severe jaw injury due to his rigorous training, making his next title uncertain.
Takeru "Tsunami" Kobayashi said he can only open his mouth to make a gap the size of a fingertip after being diagnosed with jaw arthritis.
In an entry on his blog entitled "Occupational hazard," Kobayashi said: "My jaw refused to fight any more."
The injury occurred only a week after the slender 29-year-old started training to win his seventh straight title at the annual July 4 Nathan's Famous hot dog eating event on New York's Coney Island.
Takeru "Tsunami" Kobayashi
Memorabilia Dispute Continues
Michael Jackson
A battle over ownership of Michael Jackson memorabilia is headed back to a Nevada courtroom, where the King of Pop is seeking the return of items withheld from an auction of family items.
Jackson's sister, singer Janet Jackson, also is seeking the return of items held back during a May 30-31 memorabilia auction at the Hard Rock hotel-casino in Las Vegas.
District Court Judge Elizabeth Gonzalez ordered 60 items impounded at the Clark County courthouse, the Las Vegas Review-Journal reported Monday, while she sorts out ownership and decides whether to punish the company that brought the items to auction.
Gonzalez scheduled a July 16 contempt-of-court trial after deciding June 12 that Universal Express Inc. of Boca Raton, Fla., violated earlier court orders to withhold some of the more than 1,100 items offered at auction.
Michael Jackson
Sentenced In Probation Violation
Tom Sizemore
Tom Sizemore was sentenced Monday to 16 months in prison for violating his probation in a drug case.
Superior Court Judge Cynthia Rayvis ordered the sentence after authorities said they found methamphetamine in the actor's car on May 8 in Bakersfield.
He has been in jail without bail since June 5, when he surrendered on a warrant alleging he had violated his probation.
Tom Sizemore
Apologizes For Bag
Cameron Diaz
Cameron Diaz apologized Sunday for carrying a bag with a political slogan that evoked painful memories in Peru.
The voice of Princess Fiona in the animated "Shrek" films visited the Incan city of Machu Picchu in Peru's Andes on Friday carrying an olive green bag emblazoned with a red star and the words "Serve the People" printed in Chinese, perhaps Chinese Communist leader Mao Zedong's most famous political slogan.
The bags are marketed as fashion accessories in some world capitals, but in Peru the slogan evokes memories of the Maoist Shining Path insurgency that fought the government in the 1980s and early 1990s in a bloody conflict that left nearly 70,000 people dead.
Cameron Diaz
Reopens Hall of Mirrors
Versailles
The Chateau of Versailles reopened its Hall of Mirrors to the public Monday after more than a three-year restoration of the gilded gallery of 357 mirrors.
The $16 million renovation of the castle's crown jewel, paid for by French construction company Vinci, was billed as the biggest cultural patronage project ever undertaken by a private company in France, where such work has traditionally been paid for by the state.
Vincent Guerre, in charge of renovating the gallery's mirrors, said 70 percent of them dated back to the hall's opening in the 17th century. They were polished and repaired - though some distinctive graffiti was left in place, such as the signature "Rene," inscribed during an 1820 restoration, he said. Forty-eight mirrors were replaced with mirrors dating back to the same period. Not a single one broke during the work, he said.
Versailles
Spotted In Italy
Albino Mountain Goat
Forest rangers in the northern Italian Alps have confirmed for the first time the existence of an albino mountain goat - and named him "Snowflake."
Rangers took photos of the albino capra ibex climbing with its mother Sunday at about 10,000 feet above the Les Laures valley in the northwestern Val d'Aosta region, said Christian Chioso, a regional wildlife official.
Hikers had been reporting seeing a white animal at higher elevations for months, and forest rangers have been keeping a lookout, Chioso said.
Albino Mountain Goat
| CURRENT MOON lunar phases |
