• Ellen DeGeneres says that being pulled over by the police makes her nervous, so she tries to lessen the tension by making jokes. One day, she was pulled over for speeding. When the police officer asked if she knew why she had been pulled over, she replied, “Because of the dead bodies in the trunk?” (The police officer was not amused.)
• Comedy writer Barney Dean was taking a walk in Beverly Hills—a place where people almost never walk, preferring instead to have their chauffeur drive them wherever they want to go. Suspicious, a motorcycle police officer stopped him, and Mr. Dean asked, “How fast was I going, officer?”
Politics
• Harpo Marx had a servant who did many kinds of work for him, including serving as his chauffeur. This man did not wear a uniform, and he wandered freely around the grounds, pausing to watch Harpo’s guests play croquet or tennis. One day, one of Harpo’s guests was Herbert Bayard Swope, who as a politician prided himself on being able to remember names and faces. Mr. Swope looked at Harpo’s servant, knew that he had seen him somewhere before, but could not remember his name or where he had seen him. After a long struggle with his memory, Mr. Swope finally gave up, went over to the man, and said, “Good afternoon. I’m Herbert Bayard Swope.” The reply came back, “Pleased to meet you. I’m Benny Murphy, Harpo’s chauffeur.”
• Comedian Joy Behar once announced on her radio show that next time she would read “a list of 10 reasons why Rush Limbaugh couldn’t get laid.” Her bosses advised her not to read the list on her radio show, so it became a First Amendment issue. She didn’t read the list on the air, but she explained that she was being censored, thus creating more controversy than if she had read the list. Of course, the next time she performed at a club, fans called for the list, and she read it to them. What about her radio show? Ratings went up, but she was fired anyway.
• Comedian Kate Clinton lives in Provincetown, Rhode Island. In 1992, her next-door neighbor, Peter, asked if she had heard the terrible fight the night before. She hadn’t, so Peter told her how bad the fight had been, with people yelling “f—ing liar and f—ing this and that” at each other. Suddenly, Ms. Clinton realized what had happened, and she said, “Oh, Peter! We were watching the Republican convention, screaming at George Bush in his speech. We had the windows open. Sorry.” Peter replied, “I agree, dahlin’.”
Practical Jokes
• Impressionist Rich Little played a practical joke on Bette Davis. At the urging of a friend, he called her up, imitated the voice of her friend Jimmy Stewart, and succeeded in fooling her for a while, until she asked a question that Mr. Little did not know the answer to, but Mr. Stewart would have. Ms. Davis did not take the joke well. She demanded to speak to the person who had put Mr. Little up to the joke, and she told that person, “I’ll never have anything to do with you or Rich Little again!” Later that evening, Mr. Little saw both Jimmy Stewart and President Ronald Reagan, and he told them the story of the practical joke. President Reagan knew Ms. Davis, and he offered to call her to patch things up. He called her, said, “Hello, Bette. This is Ronald Reagan,” then a moment later, he hung up the telephone. Asked what had happened, President Reagan related, “She said, ‘F—k you, Rich Little!’ and hung up.”
Inspired by a saxophone solo in a Leiber & Stoller song, this pop novelty instrumental is considered Boots Randolph's signature work. What is the title of this song that is closely linked to The Benny Hill Show?
"Yakety Sax" is a pop novelty instrumental jointly composed by James Q. "Spider" Rich and Boots Randolph. Saxophonist Randolph popularized the selection in his 1963 recording, which reached number 35 on the rock charts. UK comedian Benny Hill later made it more widely known as the closing theme music of The Benny Hill Show. The piece is considered Randolph's signature work.
The selection includes pieces of assorted fiddle tunes and was originally composed by Rich for a performance at a venue called The Armory in Hopkinsville, Kentucky. The piece also quotes two bars each of "Entrance of the Gladiators" and "The Girl I Left Behind".
Randolph's take on the piece was inspired by a saxophone solo in the Leiber and Stoller song "Yakety Yak", recorded in 1958 by the Coasters. The tunes are similar, and both feature the "yakety" saxophone sound. Randolph first recorded "Yakety Sax" that year for RCA Victor, but it did not become a hit until he re-recorded it for Monument Records in 1963; this version reached number 35 on the Billboard Hot 100 chart.
"Yakety Sax" is often used in television and film as a soundtrack for outlandishly humorous situations. It was frequently used to accompany comedic sketches—particularly the time-lapse, rapidly-paced silent chase skit that came at the end of almost every episode of The Benny Hill Show. Because of this, "Yakety Sax" is so closely linked to the series that it is also known as "The Benny Hill Theme". On The Benny Hill Show, the music was performed by Ronnie Aldrich and his orchestra.
Source
Roy the Libtard, Antifa, Snowflake in Gohmertstan (Tyler), TX wrote:
I enjoyed the Benny Hill Show, even though that song wouldn't leave my ear for hours after hearing it (and it's doing that right now again)!
mj said:
I miss that show
I believe they used the music from is show, Yakkity Sax, in one of the
scenes in V for Vendetta.
Dave responded:
Yakety Sax. I don’t believe I ever watched the Benny Hill Show, at least not a full episode. I think the American reruns edited out the bare breasts and such.
Jim from CA, retired to ID, replied:
Yakety Sax
Cal in Vermont said:
Yakety Sax
Deborah, the Master Gardener wrote:
Is it “Yakity Sax?” That’s all I have.
I first became aware of Boots Randolph during my short stint in Beatrice, NE, in1974. My roommates played an album by REO Speedwagon featuring Mr. Randolph’s signature work on a song called “Little Queenie,” IIRC.
Daniel in The City answered:
Yakety Sax
David of Moon Valley replied:
ah'm a guessin'...
…that be Yakety-Sax...
and since you’ve been putting those postcards of Johnsonburg at the end of each day’s posting, it made me curious as to what the town/city is like now…looks like google street view picked a pretty dreary time to take a spin through the area, though it being a mill town i imagine that it can be pretty dreary whatever the season…but somebody there on Center St. looks like they felt kind of festive (although maybe the decorations are there year ‘round, too…)…..
Anyway, Happy New Year to You and all of the Bartcoppers out there near and far…
Dave in Tucson responded:
The song is Yakety Sax.
DJ Useo said:
It was "Yakety Sax". A funny song, imho.
Barbara, of Peppy Tech fame wrote:
The answer is "Yakety Sax."
While searching for the song on YouTube, I came across
this video of the "great llama chase" in Sun City, Arizona, on February 26, 2015, which uses "Yakety Sax" as
the soundtrack. It looks like the llamas were enjoying themselves!
Joe answered:
The only thing I can think of is Yakety Sax. If that's not right, it should be.
Mac Mac took the day off.
Jacqueline took the day off.
Rosemary in Columbus took the day off.
John I from Hawai`i took the day off.
Stephen F took the day off.
Bob from Mechanicsburg, Pa took the day off.
Michelle in AZ took the day off.
Leo in Boise took the day off.
Kevin K. in Washington DC took the day off.
Ed K took the day off.
Jon L took the day off.
Doug in Albuquerque, New Mexico, took the day off.
-pgw took the day off.
Kenn B took the day off.
Micki took the day off.
Angelo D took the day off.
Harry M. took the day off.
George M. took the day off.
Gary K took the day off.
Roy the (now retired) hoghead (aka 'hoghed') ( Without music to decorate it, time is just a bunch of boring production deadlines or dates by which bills must be paid. ~Frank Zappa ) took the day off.
Saskplanner took the day off.
Gateway Mike took the day off.
Steve in Wonderful Sacramento, CA, took the day off.
MarilynofTC took the day off.
Paul of Seattle took the day off.
Brian S. took the day off.
Gene took the day off.
Tony K. took the day off.
Noel S. took the day off.
James of Alhambra took the day off.
BttbBob has returned to semi-retired status.
~~~~~
Info: This is one of two albums they released on Christmas Day 2020. The other is LIVE IN LONDON ’19.
“NucaCola, a fan, wrote, “Finally an official collection of King Gizzard’s early EP works! If you’re a fan of ‘Willoughby’s Beach’ and ‘12 Bar Bruise,’ then you’ll love this! Favorite track: ‘Eddie Cousin.’”
dustytrails, “Short, punchy, and fun, King Gizz gives a more matured take on their early surf rock sound.”
Price: $1 (AUS) for track; $10 (AUS) for 10-track album
Oh, this is just snarky, mean, and petty, but then I love reading snarky, mean, and petty stuff about the trash that is Predator & his enabling, racist current gold digger. Evan has such a way with his words:
Melon is known for her shitty taste in #things, like have you seen her Christmas hellhouse displays? But Donald is also known for his EXTREMELY GODAWFUL TACKY NEW MONEY taste in #things.
it is also possible Donald just hates it because none of the exposed beams have golden toilets hanging from them, and therefore it is ugly to him.
CNN says Trump also really hated the renos Melon did at Camp David recently.
CBS opens the night with a RERUN'Young Sheldon', followed by a (R) 'B Positive', then a RERUN'Mom', followed by a RERUN'The Unicorn', then a RERUN'FBI'.
On a RERUNStephen Colbert (from 12/18/20) is George Clooney.
On a RERUNJames Corden, OBE, (from 10/27/20) are Billy Porter, David Byrne, and Kane Brown.
NBC begins the night with the FRESH'New Year's Eve: Escape From 2020', followed by the FRESH'NBC's New Year's Eve 2021 With Carson Daly'.
On a RERUNJimmy Fallon (from 12/4/20) are Barack Obama and Liam Gallagher.
On a RERUNSeth Meyers (from 11/25/20) is John Oliver and Joe Buck.
On a RERUNLilly Singh (from 10/23/19) is Justin Hartley and Lea Michele.
ABC fills the night with FRESH'Dick Clark's Primetime New Year's Rockin' Eve With Ryan Seacrest 2021'.
Jimmy Kimmel is pre-empted.
The CW fills the night with the FRESH'Las Vegas Countdown To 2021'.
Faux fills the night with a FRESH'FOX's New Year's Eve Toast & Roast 2021'.
MY recycles an old 'Dateline', followed by an old 'L&O: CI'.
AMC offers the movie 'Charlie & The Chocolate Factory', followed by the movie 'Willy Wonka & The Chocolate Factory'.
BBC -
[6:00AM] DOCTOR WHO - KILL THE MOON
[7:00AM] DOCTOR WHO - MUMMY ON THE ORIENT EXPRESS
[8:00AM] DOCTOR WHO - FLATLINE
[9:00AM] DOCTOR WHO - IN THE FOREST OF THE NIGHT
[10:00AM] DOCTOR WHO - DARK WATER
[11:05AM] DOCTOR WHO - LISTEN
[12:05PM] DOCTOR WHO - TIME HEIST
[1:05PM] DOCTOR WHO - HEAVEN SENT
[2:10PM] DOCTOR WHO - THE GIRL IN THE FIREPLACE
[3:14PM] DOCTOR WHO - BLINK
[4:15PM] DOCTOR WHO - SILENCE IN THE LIBRARY
[5:15PM] DOCTOR WHO - FOREST OF THE DEAD
[6:15PM] DOCTOR WHO - AMY'S CHOICE
[7:18PM] DOCTOR WHO - VINCENT AND THE DOCTOR
[8:20PM] DOCTOR WHO - THE DAY OF THE DOCTOR
[10:00PM] DOCTOR WHO - THE TIME OF THE DOCTOR
[11:20PM] DOCTOR WHO -THE END OF TIME: BONUS EDITION
[2:20AM] DOCTOR WHO - THE TIME OF THE DOCTOR
[3:40AM] DOCTOR WHO - ROSE
[4:50AM] DOCTOR WHO - ARACHNIDS IN THE UK (ALL TIMES ET)
Bravo has 'Real Housewives Of Dallas', followed by a FRESH'Real Housewives Of Dallas', then a FRESH'Southern Charm', and then way too much 'Chrisley Knows Best'.
FX has the movie 'Venom', followed by the movie 'Venom', again.
History has all old 'Swamp People: Serpent Invasion' all night.
IFC -
[6:00am - 9:30am] Community
[10:00am - 1:30pm] Parks And Recreation
[2:00pm - 5:30pm] Three's Company
[6:00pm - 12:30am] Two And A Half Men
[1:00am - 3:30am] Parks And Recreation
[4:00am - 5:30am] Community (ALL TIMES ET)
Sundance -
[6:00am - 7:30am] the andy griffith show
[8:00am] pretty in pink
[10:00am] erin brockovich
[1:00pm - 1:00am] law & order
[2:00am - 5:00am] perry mason (ALL TIMES ET)
Classic TV comedies Murphy Brown and Roseanne ran on parallel tracks — they premiered within weeks of each other in fall 1988 for similarly long runs and came back with revivals that debuted just months apart. Now, in a powerhouse sitcom team-up, Murphy Brown star Candice Bergen will appear on ABC’s Roseanne spinoff, The Conners.
Guest starring on Jan 13 when The Conners‘ third season returns, Bergen will play Ben’s (Jay R. Ferguson) mother, Barb. Their relationship can best be described as cool. Despite being from Lanford, Barb has a superior air and a sharp tongue, but she’s much more agreeable when she’s had a few drinks. She’s judgmental about Ben’s relationship with Darlene (Sara Gilbert), and describes the Conner house as, “Like one of those places they break into on that program Cops.”
In the current third season, the Conners – Dan, Jackie, Darlene, Becky and D.J. – continue to face the daily struggles of life in Lanford. The series stars John Goodman as Dan Conner, Laurie Metcalf as Jackie Harris, Sara Gilbert as Darlene Conner, Lecy Goranson as Becky Conner-Healy, Michael Fishman as D.J. Conner, Emma Kenney as Harris Conner-Healy, Ames McNamara as Mark Conner-Healy, Jayden Rey as Mary Conner and Jay R. Ferguson as Ben.
The Conners, the highest rated broadcast comedy among adults 18-49 this season, is executive produced by Tom Werner, Sara Gilbert, Bruce Helford, Dave Caplan, Bruce Rasmussen and Tony Hernandez. Werner Entertainment is the studio.
Michael Sheen has returned an honor presented to him by Queen Elizabeth so he could air his views on the British monarchy without appearing like a "hypocrite."
The Welsh star, who was given an Order of the British Empire (OBE) in 2009 for services to drama, said in an online interview that he decided to give up the honor after conducting research into the history of Wales and its torturous relationship with England, particularly the centuries-old practice of handing the title of Prince of Wales to the heir apparent to the English throne, for the 2017 Raymond Williams Society lecture.
"In my research to do that lecture, I learned a lot about Welsh history," Sheen said, adding, "I remember sitting there going, 'well I have a choice - I either don't give this lecture and hold on to my OBE or I give this lecture and I have to give my OBE back'."
The 51-year-old actor, who memorably played Tony Blair in The Queen, explained why he waited to reveal that he had returned the award. "I didn't mean any disrespect but I just realized I'd be a hypocrite if I said the things I was going to say in the lecture about the nature of the relationship between Wales and the British state," Sheen said, adding that he decided not to announce his decision to hand back the honor in 2017 as he feared some people would find it insulting.
Sheen joins a long list of British stars who have either returned or refused a royal honor, a list which includes the likes of musicians John Lennon, Paul Weller and David Bowie, directors Danny Boyle and Ken Loach and comic actor John Cleese.
The final new “Jeopardy!” episodes hosted by Alex Trebek will air next week, with highlights that promise to be memorable.
The first of the five episodes will air Monday and start with Trebek’s “powerful message about the season of giving,” producer Sony Pictures Television said in a release Wednesday.
The final episode, on Friday, will conclude with a tribute to the longtime and beloved host. He died of pancreatic cancer on Nov. 8 at age 80.
Trebek, who had been candid about his condition, worked up until 10 days before he died, soldiering on despite debilitating treatments and the disease’s toll.
It was unexpected that the episodes taped in late October would be his final ones, Sony said. Trebek had been fighting the disease for nearly two years.
A conservative evangelical Christian singer with a history of defying COVID-19 health mandates plans three days of New Year's gatherings in the Los Angeles area, including stops on skid row and at a tent city in Echo Park, raising fears that the events will be viral "super-spreaders."
Skid row activists plan a car blockade to stop Sean Feucht — a Redding, Calif., volunteer pastor and failed Republican congressional candidate — and his followers from staging what is billed as a "massive outreach" Wednesday evening on skid row, at the height of Los Angeles County's pandemic crisis. Feucht's plans come as California, facing record case counts and a severe shortage of intensive care hospital beds, has extended its stay-at-home order.
Feucht began hosting "Let Us Worship" open-air concerts nationwide to push back against government restrictions on religious gatherings, then broadened his focus to cities that erupted in protest after the police killing of George Floyd in Minneapolis.
Feucht's events have featured hundreds of maskless worshipers tightly packed together and singing and dancing. He has another homeless outreach planned Thursday at Echo Park Lake, site of nearly 100 homeless tents, followed by a New Year's Eve party and concert at a church parking lot in Valencia.
But Stephen "Cue" Jn-Marie, pastor of Church Without Walls, a skid row congregation, said, "We know based on his track record whatever he's going to do is going to be maskless." Jn-Marie is organizing the car blockade with Los Angeles Community Action Network, a skid row anti-poverty activist group.
U.S. President Donald Trump (R-Failure)’s pardon of four American men convicted of killing Iraqi civilians while working as contractors in 2007 violated U.S. obligations under international law, U.N. human rights experts said on Wednesday.
Nicholas Slatten was convicted of first-degree murder, while Paul Slough, Evan Liberty and Dustin Heard were convicted of voluntary and attempted manslaughter, over the incident in which U.S. contractors opened fire in busy traffic in a Baghdad square and killed 14 unarmed Iraqi civilians.
The four contractors mercenaries, who worked for the private security firm Blackwater owned by the brother of Trump’s education secretary, were included in a wave of pre-Christmas pardons announced by the White House.
“Pardoning the Blackwater contractors is an affront to justice and to the victims of the Nisour Square massacre and their families,” said Jelena Aparac, chair of the U.N. working group on the use of mercenaries, said in a statement.
The Geneva Conventions oblige states to hold war criminals accountable for their crimes, even when they act as private security contractors, the U.N. experts said.
Investigators are exploring several conspiracy theories as potential motives behind the Christmas Day bombing outside an AT&T building in Nashville, Tennessee, including evidence that the bomber believed in lizard people and a so-called reptilian conspiracy, two senior law enforcement officials said Wednesday.
Investigators are expected to conclude their crime scene work this week, but it could take several more weeks until they determine the motive of the bomber, Anthony Quinn Warner, who died in the blast.
Specifically, investigators are looking into the suspect’s previous trips to an undisclosed location in Tennessee where he would camp out in his recreational vehicle and, according to the suspect’s statements to others, hunt possible aliens, the officials said.
In addition, investigators are aware of statements the suspect made about an internet conspiracy that powerful politicians and Hollywood figures are actually lizards or other reptiles who have extraterrestrial origins and are taking over society, the officials said.
Adherents of the unfounded conspiracy theory believe that politicians and other prominent people, including the Clintons and the comedian Bob Hope, who died in 2003, are actually lizard-like creatures sent to Earth and are responsible for a number of historic tragedies. Justin Bieber and the Obamas have also been named in the conspiracy theory.
A third of U.S. rivers have significantly changed color over the last 36 years, turning from blue to yellow and green, striking new images reveal.
Researchers analyzed 235,000 satellite images — taken over a 34-year period between 1984 and 2018 — from NASA and the U.S. Geological Survey (USGS) Landsat program. The changing hues can be viewed in an interactive map.
More than half of those satellite images showed rivers with a dominant hue of yellow, while more than a third of images were mostly green. Just 8% of river pics were mostly blue.
"Most of the rivers are changing gradually and not noticeable to the human eye," lead author John Gardner, a postdoctoral researcher in the global hydrology lab at University of North Carolina, told Live Science. "But areas that are the fastest changing are more likely to be man-made."
In the North and West, rivers tended to become greener, whereas the eastern regions of the U.S.had a trend toward yellow rivers. Larger waterways, such as the Ohio basin and Upper Mississippi basin, also moved to blue-green.
A well-preserved Ice Age woolly rhino with many of its internal organs still intact has been recovered from permafrost in Russia’s extreme north.
Russian media reported Wednesday that the carcass was revealed by melting permafrost in Yakutia in August. Scientists are waiting for ice roads in the Arctic region to become passable to deliver it to a lab for studies next month.
It’s among the best-preserved specimens of the Ice Age animal found to date. The carcass has most of its soft tissues still intact, including part of the intestines, thick hair and a lump of fat. Its horn was found next to it.
Recent years have seen major discoveries of mammoths, woolly rhinos, Ice Age foal, and cave lion cubs as the permafrost increasingly melts across vast areas of Siberia because of global warming.
Yakutia 24 TV quoted Valery Plotnikov, a paleontologist with the regional branch of the Russian Academy of Sciences, as saying the woolly rhino was likely 3- or 4-years-old when it died.
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said:
has returned to semi-retired status.
In memory.
