Paul K Pickett: 5 Unknown Schmucks Who Turned Into Superheroes in the Clutch (Cracked)
Superheroes save the day, rock stars entertain us and soldiers win our wars. We don't get too worked up when the experts come through in the clutch because, well, that's what they're supposed to do. But sometimes the perfect person for the job isn't available, leaving the barrier between the fan and the flying feces totally unguarded. This tends to be bad news for anyone in the room, but occasionally a nobody--an unknown and by all accounts unqualified schmuck--steps in and saves the freaking day anyway.
Lemony Snicket And Wife Announce $1M Donation To Planned Parenthood (TPM)
"My husband and I have supported Planned Parenthood for years, for obvious reasons: it's a great organization that has provided top quality health care for countless women and families in our lives," Brown told BuzzFeed, according to its report. "This year, Planned Parenthood has gone through a series of unfortunate events, and it felt right to make our support more public and more dramatic."
Mark Morford: What your "personal bacterial cloud" says about you (SF Gate)
Are you grateful your eyesight isn't better? Are you delighted you can't more easily see the millions of hungry microscopic beasts that are right now feasting on all the oils, bits of hair, awesome snowdrifts of dead skin cells you so generously left behind last night, all over your bed sheets and pillowcase?
He wrote TV theme songs (Family Affair, The Brady Bunch, My 3 Sons), his musical scores for film received 4 Oscar nominations, and he was bandleader Happy Kyne on Fernwood 2 Night. What is his name?
Frank Denny De Vol (September 20, 1911 - October 27, 1999), also known simply as De Vol, was an American arranger, composer and actor.
De Vol wrote the scores for many Hollywood movies, receiving Academy Award nominations for four of them: Pillow Talk (1959), Hush… Hush, Sweet Charlotte (1964), Cat Ballou (1965) and Guess Who's Coming to Dinner (1967).
De Vol was also an actor specializing in deadpan comic characters, especially as bandleader Happy Kyne on the 1970s talk show parodies Fernwood 2 Night and America 2-Night. He also appeared in television series I'm Dickens, He's Fenster, I Dream of Jeannie, Gidget, Bonanza, Petticoat Junction, Mickey starring Mickey Rooney, The Brady Bunch, Get Smart, and The Jeffersons.
Source
Alan J was first, and correct, with:
Frank De Vol.
Deborah responded:
Frank De Vol - I only know because I consulted the great Wiki. I didn't have a tv in those days so never watched that show.
Finally much cooler, cloudy, with a hint of moisture in the air. I can live with this.
Lois, the Great Meme Thief. Never stop the stealing of great memes.
Marian replied:
Frank De Vol
The Hills Are Alive With The Sound Of Lois Of Oregon said:
No time for research or fact checking today! Late for work! Have to get my answer with a quick scan of Google Image Search and make it up from there! Judging by the results, Frank de vol was a very busy actor seen in many productions and a prolific musician who apparently wrote the scores for EVERY film and TV show produced over a span of five decades. There is also a disturbing connection running through these images which calls his morals and personal hygiene into question, but no time for details!
P.S. Dale...that picture from yesterday...what that girl coated with clowncum?
Delightfully Dale of Diamond Springs, Norfallcali answered:
Frank De Vol is correctomundo. Don't confuse "Fernwood 2nite", a summer replacement for "Mary Hartman, Mary Hartman" with "America 2nite." These were truly subversive shows for their times. Besides, who could ever forget Tony Roletti?
Saw the Amazing Beth Hart at the Crest in Sactown last night. Man, she can sure belt out a tune or two or three……or more. Got us up to DANCE! Annie and 88 year old Mom rocked out. Quality of pixes I apologize for. Oh yeah, chopped my "Locks for Lasses" off!
MAM wrote:
Frank De Vol ~ An arranger, a composer and an actor. De Vol worked in the US music scene from the 1950s to 80s as a conductor and a writer of TV and movie themes. He was one of the most important musicians of 20th centuty.
Patriot Act NSA Spying Unconstitutional Section 215 National Security Letters Must End
My name is Marc Perkel and I have decided to announce that I will not comply with the so called "Patriot Act" laws requiring me to disclose information about my customers. If I receive a national security letter I will immediately photograph it, post it online everywhere I can, and then make a video of me burning it. I will then await my arrest. If you want to put me in jail then come get me mother fucker.
CBS fills the night with LIVE'Thursday Night Football', then pads the left coast with local crap.
Scheduled on a FRESHStephen Colbert are Secretary of State John Kerry, Claire Danes, and PewDiePie.
Scheduled on a FRESHJames Corden, OBE, are Jessica Alba, Ben Schwartz, and Grace.
NBC begins the night with a FRESH'Heroes Reborn', followed by a FRESH'The Blacklist', then a FRESH'The Player'.
Scheduled on a FRESHJimmy Fallon are Miley Cyrus, Sam Rockwell, and Disclosure.
Scheduled on a FRESHSeth Meyers are Ellen Page, Ken Jeong, and Junot Diaz.
Scheduled on a FRESHCarson 'The Scab' Daly are Priyanka Chopra, Kimya Dawson, and Adrianne Palicki.
ABC starts the night with a FRESH'Grey's Anatomy', followed by a FRESH'Scandal', then a FRESH'How To Get Away With Murder'.
Scheduled on a FRESHJimmy Kimmel are LL Cool J, Kate Mara, and Andra Day.
The CW offers a RERUN'The Flash', followed by a RERUN'Arrow'.
Faux has a FRESH'Bones', followed by a FRESH'Sleepy Hollow'.
MY has 'TMZ (Not So) Live', followed by 'Hollywood Today (Not So) Live'.
A&E has 'The First 48', followed by a FRESH'The First 48: Revenge Kills', then the FRESH'OJ Speaks: The Hidden Tapes'.
AMC offers the movie 'Pet Sematary', followed by the movie 'Stephen King's Thinner', then the movie 'Cujo'.
BBC -
[6:00AM] Cash in the Attic - Season 18 - Ep 5 - Skan
[7:00AM] Cash in the Attic - Season 18 - Ep 6 - Humby
[8:00AM] Doctor Who - Season 7 - Ep 5 - The Angels Take Manhattan
[9:00AM] Doctor Who: Genesis of the Daleks
[12:00PM] Star Trek: The Next Generation - Season 7 - Ep 5 - Gambit (Part 2)
[1:00PM] Star Trek: The Next Generation - Season 7 - Ep 6 - Phantasms
[2:00PM] Top Gear: Best of British-Episode 1
[3:00PM] Top Gear: Best of British-Episode 2
[4:00PM] Top Gear: Best of British-Episode 3
[5:00PM] Top Gear - Season 20 - Episode 4
[6:00PM] Top Gear - Season 20 - Episode 5
[7:00PM] Top Gear - Season 20 - Episode 6
[8:00PM] Crimson Tide
[10:30PM] Crimson Tide
[1:00AM] Doctor Who - Season 9 - Ep 2 - The Witch's Familiar
[2:00AM] Doctor Who: City of Death
[4:00AM] Doctor Who: The Keeper of Traken (ALL TIMES EST)
Bravo has 'Real Housewives Of Oc', another 'Real Housewives Of OC', 'Don't Be Tardy ... ', followed by a FRESH'Don't Be Tardy ... ', then a FRESH'Bravo First Looks', followed by the FRESH'OJ Speaks: The Hidden Tapes', then a FRESH'Bravo First Looks', followed by a FRESH'Watch What Happens Live'.
Comedy Central has 'South Park', another 'South Park', followed by the movie 'A Haunted House', then a FRESH'Review', and 'South Park'.
Scheduled on a FRESHThe Daily Show is Ryan Adams.
Scheduled on a FRESH@Midnight are Randy Sklar, Jason Sklar, and Sarah Tiana.
FX has the movie 'Grown Ups 2', followed by the movie 'Just Go With It', then a FRESH'Married', followed by another FRESH'Married'.
History has 'Mountain Men', another 'Mountain Men', followed by a FRESH'Mountain Men', 'Pawn Stars', and another 'Pawn Stars'.
IFC -
[6:00AM] DOCUMENTARY NOW!-SANDY PASSAGE
[6:30AM] DOCUMENTARY NOW!-DRONEZ: THE HUNT FOR EL CHINGON
[7:00AM] DOCUMENTARY NOW!-KUNUK UNCOVERED
[7:30AM] RED DAWN
[10:00AM] SUPER
[12:15PM] RED DAWN
[2:45PM] PUNISHER: WAR ZONE
[5:00PM] 300
[7:30PM] 300
[10:00PM] BENDERS-CHOKE
[10:30PM] GIGI DOES IT-GLOCK SCHLOCK
[11:00PM] THAT '70S SHOW-THE PILOT
[11:30PM] THAT '70S SHOW-ERIC'S BIRTHDAY
[12:00AM] THAT '70S SHOW-STREAKING
[12:30AM] THAT '70S SHOW-BATTLE OF THE SEXISTS
[1:00AM] BENDERS-CHOKE
[1:30AM] GIGI DOES IT-GLOCK SCHLOCK
[2:00AM] SAW
[4:15AM] COMEDY BANG! BANG!-CRAIG ROBINSON
[4:30AM] THAT '70S SHOW-THE PILOT
[5:00AM] THAT '70S SHOW-ERIC'S BIRTHDAY
[5:30AM] THAT '70S SHOW-STREAKING (ALL TIMES EST)
Sundance -
[6:00AM] You Kill Me
[8:00AM] Field of Dreams
[10:30AM] Ghostbusters
[1:00PM] Ghostbusters II
[3:30PM] Field of Dreams
[6:00PM] Law & Order-Out of the Half-Light
[7:00PM] Law & Order-Discord
[8:00PM] Law & Order-Apocrypha
[9:00PM] Law & Order-Big Bang
[10:00PM] Law & Order-Mayhem
[11:00PM] Law & Order-Family Values
[12:00AM] Law & Order-Pride
[1:00AM] A League of Their Own
[4:00AM] The Natural (ALL TIMES EST)
SyFy has the movie 'The Last Exorcism', followed by a FRESH'WWE Steroid SmackDown', then a FRESH'Dominion', followed by a FRESH'Geeks Who Drink'.
TBS:
Scheduled on a FRESHConan are Benicio del Toro, Starlee Kine, and Watkins Family Hour.
Actress Julie Andrews arrives at the Los Angeles Philharmonic 2015/2016 season opening gala on Tuesday, Sept. 29, 2015, at Walt Disney Concert Hall in Los Angeles.
Photo by Richard Shotwell
Democrats criticized House Majority Leader Kevin McCarthy Wednesday after he suggested that the House's Benghazi investigation committee can take credit for Hillary Rodham Clinton's diminished public standing.
Democrats said the comments by the California Republican in a Fox News Channel interview contradict claims by the committee's leader and other Republicans that the panel is merely seeking the truth about the deadly 2012 attacks at a U.S. diplomatic facility in Benghazi, Libya.
McCarthy, who is considered likely to become House speaker following John Boehner's surprise resignation last week, told conservative host Sean Hannity that, "Everybody thought Hillary Clinton was unbeatable (as a Democratic candidate for president), right? But we put together a Benghazi special committee, a select committee. What are her numbers today? Her numbers are dropping."
Clinton's poll numbers have dropped "because she's untrustable," McCarthy said. "But no one would have known any of that had happened had we not fought and made that happen."
A spokesman for House Democratic Leader Nancy Pelosi said McCarthy's comments show that Republicans "were never interested in a bipartisan investigation to improve the security of Americans abroad. They've only been interested in pure extremist political theater."
Actor John Turturro, left, actor Tim Blake Nelson, director Ethan Coen, actor George Clooney and director Joel Coen attend a special 15th anniversary screening of, "O Brother, Where Art Thou?", during the New York Film Festival at Alice Tully Hall on Tuesday, Sept. 29, 2015, in New York.
Photo by Evan Agostini
Michael Moore's latest documentary, "Where to Invade Next," has been acquired by a newly formed distributor.
The landing place for Moore's film had been a big question in Hollywood following the movie's acclaimed debut opening night at the Toronto International Film Festival in early September.
Moore's films have been among the most lucrative documentaries at the box office. His "Fahrenheit 9-11" earned $119.2 million in 2004; his last film, 2009's "Capitalism: A Love Story," made $14.4 million.
"Where to Invade Next" will be the first film from a not-yet-named distribution label formed by Alamo Drafthouse founder Tim League and former Radius founders Tom Quinn and Jason Janego. Moore called them a "cinematic Dream Team."
Forty-four years ago, David Scott's watch broke while he was out for a walk.
Somehow, the crystal that protected the wristwatch's face popped off. Scott did not notice it had broken until after he had come back inside. Fortunately for him, he had another watch to wear.
Of course, none of that would be noteworthy had Scott not been on the moon at the time.
The commander of NASA's Apollo 15 mission, Scott was the sixth person to walk on the moon and the first to drive a car there, the lunar rover, in July 1971.
On Oct. 22, after a week of online bidding that will open at $50,000, Scott's personal Apollo 15-used chronograph will be sold by RR Auction of Boston. The sale is expected to draw watch and space collectors alike, as it the only time a watch worn on the moon has ever been offered.
Fox News is collaborating with SiriusXM to launch a 24-hour news service that will update satellite radio listeners and mobile device users on headlines every 15 minutes.
The service, to launch Oct. 5, is Fox's most high-profile new business venture since the Fox Business Network was started in 2007. Fox is hiring 40 to 50 new journalists and building a new newsroom for the operation, said Jay Wallace, Fox's senior vice-president of news.
Fox News Headlines 24/7 will introduce SiriusXM subscribers to a concept familiar to radio listeners in many of the nation's biggest cities - top stories continuously updated and repeated in 15-minute increments. The station will also be streamed online and available to people through an app that can be paid for separately from SiriusXM's main service.
The service will also be a training ground for new Fox talent and provide reporting on some stories that can make their way to the TV network, he said.
Pope Francis met a Kentucky county clerk last week who was jailed for refusing to issue marriage licenses to gay couples, the Vatican said on Wednesday, confirming earlier reports from the United States.
"I do not deny that the meeting took place, but I have no comment to add," Vatican spokesman Federico Lombardi said in a statement.
Earlier, Lombardi had said he could neither confirm nor deny the meeting.
Rowan County Clerk Kim Davis and her husband met the pope during the Washington leg of his visit to the United States, she and her lawyer told American media.
Funny, but both of them believe the other belongs to a cult, isn't properly baptized, and is bound for hell.
But Hallelujah, look at 'em bond over homophobia.
Dona nobis fuck you.
Frederic de Laurens, a former top manager at French national archives, points to the name Adolf Hitler on a ledger listing Goering's looted art, Wednesday, Sept. 30, 2015 outside Paris, France. France's World War II archives have helped produce an unusual art book: a catalog of more than 1,000 paintings, tapestries and sculptures amassed by senior Nazi official Hermann Goering _ many of them stolen from Jews deported to death camps.
Photo by Jacques Brinon
ABC's "Nightline" is apologizing for confusing new network star Priyanka Chopra with another Indian actress.
The news magazine aired a feature earlier this week about Chopra, the star of ABC's new drama "Quantico." A video shot supposedly showing Chopra in the Miss World pageant was included.
But the video was of Yukta Mookhey, who won the crown in 1999. Chopra was the 2000 Miss World winner.
Chopra, a Bollywood star who plays an FBI recruit in "Quantico," responded to the mix-up on Twitter by posting "LOL" and linking to another post that read, "Uh oh, @Nightline!"
An appellate court ruled Wednesday that California's newest anti-paparazzi law aimed at curtailing reckless driving by photographers is constitutional and does not violate the First Amendment right to freedom of the press.
A three-justice panel of the 2nd District Court of Appeal in Los Angeles also unanimously decided the law is not vague and does not place an undue burden on the rights of newsgatherers, as opponents of the statute have argued.
The ruling came in a case involving photographer Paul Raef, who was charged under the 2010 law after being accused of engaging in a high-speed pursuit of Justin Bieber along a Los Angeles freeway in 2012.
"Raef has not identified existing laws that would as effectively regulate the variety of traffic violations, short of actual crashes, that can be committed in paparazzi-like pursuits," the justices wrote.
The Seer Stone and Pouch exhibit is shown during a tour of the Mormon Church History Museum, Tuesday, Sept. 29, 2015, in Salt Lake City. The Mormon church's renovated history museum set to reopen this week features a small and surprising display about an uncomfortable part of the faith's history that for generations has been glossed over: polygamy.
Photo by Rick Bowmer
A ranking Republican lawmaker has abruptly resigned from the Indiana House, conceding he made "mistakes" that resulted in him sending a text message apology to friends and acquaintances for "anything offensive" that may have been sent from his cellphone.
House Majority Leader Jud McMillin of Brookville said in a Facebook post Wednesday that he was giving up his seat to "remedy" mistakes by focusing on his family. He officially resigned Tuesday.
His resignation came a week after he texted multiple people stating that his cellphone had been stolen and apologizing for messages they may have received from his number. Details about the content of those messages have not been revealed.
This was not McMillin's first brush with ethics in public office. Ten years ago, a domestic violence victim said they had a sexual relationship while he was handling the case as an assistant prosecutor in Montgomery County, Ohio. He resigned that position in 2005, a matter of weeks after he withdrew from the domestic violence case, and the woman sued him for legal malpractice the following year.
Billionaire William Koch persuaded a federal appeals court to uphold a jury verdict and $1.15 million award against Silicon Valley entrepreneur and fellow oenophile Eric Greenberg over the sale of 24 bottles of fake Bordeaux.
By a 3-0 vote, the 2nd U.S. Circuit Court of Appeals in New York on Wednesday rejected Greenberg's argument that there was a "complete absence of evidence" that he deceived Koch into buying the wine, which Greenberg has said he thought was authentic.
Greenberg was accused of knowingly selling the wine at an October 2005 auction by Zachys Wine Auctions, including Chateau Lafite from 1811, Chateau Latour from 1864 and 1865 and a magnum of Chateau Petrus from 1921.
Jurors in April 2013 awarded Koch $12.4 million, including $12 million of punitive damages, after a three-week trial. The trial judge later cut the award to $1.15 million, including just $711,622 of punitive damages. Koch has settled with Zachys.
Forbes magazine estimates his net worth at $2.1 billion. Koch is also the younger brother of conservative political activists and fellow billionaires Charles and David Koch.
Phil Woods, a leading alto saxophonist in mainstream jazz for more than 60 years whose piercing solos could also be heard on hit records by Billy Joel and Paul Simon, has died. He was 83.
Woods died Tuesday in Stroudsburg, Pennsylvania, said Philip Bensing, owner of the Bensing-Thomas Funeral Home.
Woods gave his last concert on Sept. 4 in Pittsburgh, using oxygen to complete a performance of the classic album "Charlie Parker With Strings" with the Pittsburgh Symphony Orchestra, the Pittsburgh Post-Gazette reported. That night he announced he had emphysema and was retiring.
Woods grew up in the Swing Era where his early influences included alto saxophonists Benny Carter and Johnny Hodges. He made his name as a fiery disciple of bebop pioneer Charlie "Bird" Parker, earning the nickname "the new Bird" after Parker's untimely death in 1955. He was married to Parker's widow, Chan, for 17 years.
Woods released more than 50 albums as a leader and many more as a sideman with such jazz luminaries as Dizzy Gillespie, Thelonious Monk, Bill Evans and Clark Terry. He won four Grammys.
But Woods was perhaps best known outside the jazz world for his alto sax solo at the end of Joel's 1977 hit recording "Just the Way You Are." He also performed on recordings by Paul Simon ("Have a Good Time") and Steely Dan ("Doctor Wu").
Philip Wells Woods was born on Nov. 2, 1931 in Springfield, Mass. After inheriting an alto sax from his uncle, he began taking lessons at the age of 12. As a teenager in 1945, he heard Parker's bebop recordings with trumpeter Dizzy Gillespie.
After graduating high school, he moved to New York where he studied classical music by day at Juilliard and jazz in the clubs at night.
In the mid-1950s, Woods began leading his own combos. He got his big break when Quincy Jones asked him to join a 1956 State Department-sponsored world tour with Gillespie's big band.
"There was a very specific reason Phil played on nearly every album I've made since 1956, because he not only was the best jazz alto sax player there was, he was a truly beautiful person," Jones said in a statement released Tuesday.
Woods toured Europe with Jones' big band in 1959, and three years later took part in Benny Goodman's historic tour of Russia.
Back in the United States, Woods found fewer chances to play pure jazz and grew disenchanted with studio work. In 1968, he moved to Europe where he formed his more adventurous European Rhythm Machine which incorporated some electronic and free-jazz elements.
In the mid '70s, Woods and his wife and manager, Jill Goodwin, settled in Delaware Water Gap in eastern Pennsylvania, where he co-founded the long-running Celebration of the Arts festival.
Woods was voted the top alto sax player nearly 30 times in Downbeat magazine's annual readers' poll starting in 1975. His quintet - which included brother-in-law drummer Bill Goodwin, bassist Steve Gilmore, and other musicians such as trumpeter Brian Lynch and pianist Bill Charlap - was named the top small combo several times.
Woods, who was also a prolific composer and arranger, was named a National Endowment for the Arts Jazz Master in 2007.
Hot air balloons are prepared for a flight as others take off during an international hot air balloon festival at Maayan Harod National park in northern Israel September 30, 2015.
Photo by Baz Ratner
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took the day off.
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