Marc Dion: The Old-Guy Diss (Creators Syndicate)
I'm 58 years old. On the plus side, I've still got all my hair. On the minus side, I don't have all my teeth. On the plus side, I can still wear sport coats I bought 20 years ago. They're tweed. Tweed lasts. I can't box anymore because of my right knee, which will no longer allow me to pivot the way you have to if you're going to throw a good right hand. Age is winning, but on the right night, I can feel like I'm holding the years to a tie.
An antimacassar is a small cloth placed over the backs or arms of chairs, or the head or cushions of a sofa, to prevent soiling of the permanent fabric. The name also refers to the cloth flap 'collar' on a sailor's shirt/top, used to keep macassar oil off the uniform.
Source
mj was first and correct with:
Have a bunch of these from my grandmother
An antimacassar is a kind of doily or other cloth that rests at the top
of an upholstered chair where a person's head would come into contact
with the cloth. Its use was instigated in an era (Victorian?) when men
uses macassar oil to dress their hair (slick it back). The antimacassar
protected the chair upholstery from the oil.
Alan J said:
A Chair.
Robert wrote:
Sit back and relax, it will come to me.
Jim from CA, retired to ID, responded:
small cloth placed over the backs or arms of chairs, or the head or cushions of a sofa, to prevent soiling of the permanent fabric.[
Adam answered:
The linen closet, I think. Or more directly, the arms & backs if chairs and couches.
Marian replied:
cloth placed on the back of a chair to capture grease from your hair rather than get it on the furniture.
Deborah said:
You'd find an antimacassar on the back of a couch, sofa, divan, or stuffed chair, protect the upholstery from grease and dirt. Or it can be ornamental. It's a word that brings to mind my great-grandmother's parlor, where all her upholstered furniture featured lace antimacassars that she tatted herself.
And more rain, keeping things nice and wet and gray.
MAM wrote:
Antimacassar ~ A piece of cloth put over the back of a chair to protect it from grease and dirt or as an ornament.
Lois Of The Linens responded:
Antimacassar were the decorative drop cloths invented by Victorian era housekeepers in a futile effort to sop up the grease and fluids sloughing off of visitors who oozed into your home and violated the furniture. In other words, the "doilies" that your granny had pinned to all the upholstery in her house, which were later replaced with hideously uncomfortable and noisy slipcovers, after the invention of plastic in the 1950's, and even later, with exploding furniture, which finally solved the problem of unwanted guests.
Joe S took the day off.
Dale of Diamond Springs, Norfuckcali took the day off.
Randall took the day off.
Charlie took the day off.
Sally has retired, but still pays attention.
BttbBob has returned to semi-retired status.
~~~~~
Patriot Act NSA Spying Unconstitutional Section 215 National Security Letters Must End
My name is Marc Perkel and I have decided to announce that I will not comply with the so called "Patriot Act" laws requiring me to disclose information about my customers. If I receive a national security letter I will immediately photograph it, post it online everywhere I can, and then make a video of me burning it. I will then await my arrest. If you want to put me in jail then come get me mother fucker.
CBS starts the night with '60 Minute', followed by a FRESH'Madam Secretary', then a FRESH'The Good Wife'.
NBC opens the night with the FRESH'NBC News: YouTube Demo Candidates', followed by 'Dateline'.
ABC begins the night with a FRESH'America's So-Called Funniest Home Videos', followed by a FRESH'Galavant', then another FRESH'Galavant', then a RERUN'Quantico', followed by another RERUN'Quantico'.
The CW offers an old 'Person Of Interest', followed by an old 'Elementary', then 2½ hours of what passes for local news and other fluffery.
Faux has a RERUN'The Simpsons', followed by a FRESH'Bob's Burgers', then a FRESH'The Simpsons', followed by a FRESH'Cooper Barrett's Guide To Surviving', then a FRESH'Family Guy', followed by a FRESH'Bordertown'.
MY has an old 'Anger Management', followed by another old 'Anger Management', then an old 'Big Bang Theory', followed by another old 'Big Bang Theory', then still another old 'Big Bang Theory', followed by yet another old 'Big Bang Theory'.
A&E has 'Critics Choice Red Carpet Live!', followed by 'The 21st Annual Critics' Choice Awards'.
AMC offers the movie 'Rambo III', followed by the movie 'First Blood', then the movie 'Rambo: First Blood Part II'.
BBC -
[6:00AM] PLANET EARTH: THE BLUE PLANET - SEASON 1, Ep 5 - Mountains - Life in Thin Air
[7:00AM] PLANET EARTH: THE BLUE PLANET - SEASON 1, Ep 6 - Grasslands - Roots of Power
[8:00AM] PLANET EARTH: THE BLUE PLANET - SEASON 1, Ep 7 - Rivers - Friend and Foe
[9:00AM] PLANET EARTH: THE BLUE PLANET - SEASON 1, Ep 8 - Cities - Surviving the Urban Jungle
[10:00AM] MAN VS. WILD - SEASON 5, Ep 4 - Western Pacific
[11:00AM] MAN VS. WILD - SEASON 5, Ep 5 - Northern Australia
[12:00PM] MAN VS. WILD - SEASON 5, Ep 6 - Mojave
[1:00PM] MAN VS. WILD - SEASON 5, Ep 7 - Fan vs. Wild
[2:00PM] MAN VS. WILD - SEASON 5, Ep 9 - Cape Wrath Scotland
[3:00PM] MAN VS. WILD - SEASON 5, Ep 10 - Norway: Edge of Survival
[4:00PM] MAN VS. WILD - SEASON 6, Ep 1 - Arizona
[5:00PM] HOOK
[8:00PM] ROBIN HOOD: PRINCE OF THIEVES
[11:00PM] ROBIN HOOD: PRINCE OF THIEVES
[2:00AM] MAN VS. WILD - SEASON 5, Ep 7 - Fan vs. Wild
[3:00AM] MAN VS. WILD - SEASON 5, Ep 9 - Cape Wrath Scotland
[4:00AM] MAN VS. WILD - SEASON 5, Ep 10 - Norway: Edge of Survival
[5:00AM] MAN VS. WILD - SEASON 6, Ep 1 - Arizona (ALL TIMES EST)
Bravo has 'Real Housewives Of Atlanta', followed by a FRESH'Real Housewives Of Atlanta', then a FRESH'Real Housewives Of Potomac', followed by a FRESH'Work Out NY', then a FRESH'Watch What Happens Live'.
Comedy Central has the movie 'The Change-Up', 'Gabriel Iglesias: Aloha Fluffy', and 'Gabriel Iglesias: I'm Not Fat ... I'm Fluffy'.
FX has the movie 'X-Men Origins: Wolverine', followed by the movie 'Wolverine'.
History has 'Ax Men', followed by a FRESH'Ax Men: Logged & Loaded', then a FRESH'Ax Men', followed by a FRESH'Live To Tell'.
IFC -
[6:00AM] COMEDY BANG! BANG!-Maya Rudolph
[6:15AM] THAT '70S SHOW-Fez Gets the Girl
[6:45AM] THAT '70S SHOW-Dine and Dash
[7:15AM] THAT '70S SHOW-Radio Daze
[7:45AM] THAT '70S SHOW-Donna's Panties
[8:15AM] THAT '70S SHOW-Romantic Weekend
[8:45AM] THAT '70S SHOW-Kitty's Birthday (That's Today?!)
[9:15AM] THAT '70S SHOW-The Trials of Michael Kelso
[9:45AM] THAT '70S SHOW-Eric's Naughty No-No
[10:15AM] TODD MARGARET-The Poor Decisions of Todd Margaret Part 1
[10:45AM] TODD MARGARET-The Poor Decisions of Todd Margaret Part 2
[11:15AM] TODD MARGARETS-The Increasingly Poor Decisions of Todd Margaret
[11:45AM] PORTLANDIA-The Story of Toni and Candace
[12:15PM] PORTLANDIA-The Fiancee
[12:45PM] PORTLANDIA-Healthcare
[1:15PM] PORTLANDIA-Sea World
[1:45PM] PORTLANDIA-4th of July
[2:15PM] PORTLANDIA-Fashion
[2:45PM] WARRIOR
[6:00PM] BILLY MADISON
[8:00PM] GHOSTBUSTERS
[10:15PM] GHOSTBUSTERS II (ALL TIMES EST)
Sundance -
[6:00AM] The Three Stooges
[6:30AM] From Dusk Till Dawn
[8:30AM] Kill Bill: Vol. 1
[11:00AM] Close Up With The Hollywood Reporter-Actors
[12:00PM] Troy
[3:30PM] Jeremiah Johnson
[6:00PM] Dances With Wolves
[10:00PM] Unforgiven
[12:10AM] Jeremiah Johnson
[2:43AM] Affliction
[5:15AM] The Three Stooges
[5:38AM] The Three Stooges (ALL TIMES EST)
SyFy has the movie 'The Faculty', followed by the movie 'From Dusk Till Dawn'.
Cast members Bryan Cranston, Dustin Hoffman and James Hong (L-R) pose at the premiere of "Kung Fu Panda 3" at the TCL Chinese theatre in Hollywood, California January 16, 2016. The movie opens in the U.S. on January 29.
Photo by Mario Anzuoni
The man behind The Simpsons and Futurama is developing a new animated series for Netflix, according to numerous Hollywood trade publications. Matt Groening has reportedly signed on as the latest creative force meant to help bolster Netflix's original content lineup. Little else is known about this new project aside from the fact that Groening will handle writing duties. Variety says Netflix is considering ordering two seasons, each comprised of 10 episodes.
Netflix isn't offering any comment on the rumored partnership at this time and there's not yet been any formal announcement. The deal isn't expecting to pull Groening away from The Simpsons; he'll continue to be showrunner for the legendary series, currently in its 27th season on FOX. Netflix already has one well-received animated show on its slate of original programming: BoJack Horsemen is set to return for a third season this year.
Actor/creator/executive producer Zach Galifianakis participates in the "Baskets" panel at the FX Networks Winter TCA on Saturday, Jan. 16, 2016, in Pasadena, Calif.
Photo by Richard Shotwell
A team of researchers using historical documents and 21st-century archaeological techniques has confirmed the site where 19 innocent people were hanged during the Salem witch trials more than three centuries ago.
The site, known as Proctor's Ledge, is a small city-owned plot of woods nestled between two residential streets and behind a Walgreens pharmacy, said Salem State University history professor Emerson "Tad" Baker, a member of the seven-person team, which announced its findings this week.
Historian Sidney Perley had pinpointed Proctor's Ledge nearly a century ago as the site of the hangings by using historical documents, but his findings were lost to time, and myth, misconceptions and conspiracy theories had taken their place, Baker said.
The current research, known as the Gallows Hill Project, was about correcting the misinformation many people have about one of the most tragic episodes in American history.
Twenty people suspected of witchcraft were killed in Salem in 1692 during a frenzy stoked by superstition, fear of disease and strangers, and petty jealousies. Nineteen were hanged, and one man was crushed to death by rocks.
The once-homeless man whose silky voice turned him into an Internet sensation five years ago is back on the air - at the same Ohio radio station where he started a broadcasting career derailed by drug and alcohol addiction.
Ted Williams recently returned to the airwaves with a weekday program on WKVO-AM, The Columbus Dispatch reported. Williams, 58, got his start at the station in the 1980s.
The new show is Williams' first steady employment since 1993 and comes five years after The Dispatch featured the former panhandler's smooth radio voice in an online video.
The video brought Williams instant fame but meant his personal struggles played out in public, including Dr. Phil appearances and family altercations that made the tabloids.
When The Dispatch caught up with Williams in October 2014, he was living in an apartment with no furniture, didn't have a car and couldn't explain what happened to a $395,000 advance for his 2012 memoir.
A prominent American art dealer has gone to court in a fight with a British collector -- reportedly representing the Qatari royal family -- over a Picasso sculpture valued at more than $100 million.
The work, "Bust of a Woman (Marie-Therese)," dated 1931, is currently on display at the Museum of Modern Art (MoMA) in New York as part of the largest exhibit of sculpture by the Spanish master in 50 years.
Larry Gagosian, who has worked with members of the Picasso family for years, is asking the federal court in Manhattan to reject the opposing side's claim to the sculpture.
He contends that he purchased it in May 2015 from the daughter of the artist, Maya Widmaier-Picasso, for $105.8 million, according to a legal action he filed in federal court, viewed Wednesday by AFP.
The subject of the bust, Marie-Therese Walter, was Picasso's mistress and model for several years and the mother of Widmaier-Picasso.
The trial for former professional wrestling star Jimmy "Superfly" Snuka in the death of his mistress more than three decades ago has been postponed with a defense attorney saying his client is not competent for the proceedings.
Robert Kirwan II filed a motion in Pennsylvania's Lehigh Country Court for a competency hearing for the 72-year-old resident of Camden County, New Jersey, who was scheduled to go on trial in March.
Snuka has been charged with third-degree murder and involuntary manslaughter in the death of 23-year-old Nancy Argentino, of New York, who was found dead in May 1983 after authorities were called to their hotel room near Allentown. Snuka has pleaded not guilty and his lawyer has called Argentino's death an "unfortunate accident."
Kirwan told Judge Kelly Banach on Friday that the former WWE wrestler's mental health has declined steadily in recent months and he no longer understands the charges or even knows that he was arrested.
Snuka was known for diving from the ropes and even the top of steel cages in a career that spanned four decades. He was admitted into the World Wrestling Entertainment Hall of Fame in 1996, according to the organization's website.
A model wears a creation for Versace men's Fall-Winter 2016-2017 collection, part of the Milan Fashion Week, unveiled in Milan, Italy, Saturday, Jan. 16, 2016.
Photo by Luca Bruno
The U.S. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention is closely monitoring individuals who may have been exposed to the new strain of bird flu that has been found in a flock of turkeys in Indiana, a CDC health official said on Friday.
Dr. Michael Jhung, a medical officer at the CDC, said there is no evidence of human infection related to the new bird flu strain known as H7N8, but the agency and local health officials are not taking any chances.
"There's always the possibility of implications to human health when you see a new flu virus in animals, like we're seeing now in turkeys," Jhung told Reuters in an interview.
Jhung said the CDC and local health departments are already implementing a program designed after last year's large bird flu outbreak in poultry, and will monitor people in close contact with infected birds.
Skiers disguised as a witches participate in the 34rd ski downhill race at Belalp-Blatten, Southwestern Switzerland, Saturday, Jan. 16, 2016. The downhill at Belalp is a fun event called "Hexenabfahrt" (downhill of the witches), and many of the around 1,300 participants race down the 5-kilometer slope in colorful costumes.
Photo by Olivier Maire
A new Israeli bill targeting leftwing NGOs has prompted comparisons with the climate of hatred two decades ago and drawn criticism from rights groups, Washington and the European Union.
At the heart of the storm over a bill that the United States has warned could have "chilling" repercussions are long-established leftist Israeli organisations with strong international reputations.
Peace Now promotes the creation of a Palestinian state, B'Tselem documents violations of human rights in the Palestinian territories, while Breaking The Silence is run by former soldiers opposed to Israeli occupation of the West Bank.
Rightwing NGOs supporting the Israeli occupation of the West Bank tend instead to rely on private donations, such as from American Irving Moskowitz who grants funds for Jews to buy homes in Israeli-annexed east Jerusalem.
In response, the leftwing New Israel Fund has launched a campaign highlighting the dangers of such logic.
Its banners erected on highways and at bus stops show Rabin's face with the slogan: "(The right) has already dealt with this foreign agent."
A group in costumes performes on drums during the ''Glaibasler Charivari'' rehearsals, a traditional pre-carnival show in Basel, Switzerland, 16 January 2016. The carnival show unites different music groups and comedians. The show runs in January from 16 until 30.
Photo by Georgios Kefalas
Qatari-funded construction projects have provided 1,000 new dwellings for Palestinians left homeless by the 2014 Gaza war with Israel, and a similar number for low-income families in the territory, officials said on Saturday.
The Gulf state's contribution is the sole significant sign of rebuilding in the Gaza Strip, where some 100,000 people remain displaced 18 months after the fighting, with economic growth stifled by Israeli and Egyptian blockades.
The Qatari donations have buoyed Gaza's de facto Islamist Hamas rulers, irking Israel and the U.S.-backed Palestinian administration based in the occupied West Bank. Past efforts by Qatar to mediate between Hamas and Israel yielded little.
After the 2014 war, Qatar pledged $1 billion for building projects in Gaza, of which $50 million was paid to owners of destroyed houses to fund the rebuilding of shelters. Qatar envoy Mohammed Al-Amadi said 1,000 new homes had been completed since.
An Indonesian-funded hospital opened in Gaza last month, the first new medical centre in the territory in a decade.
A cameraman takes video of an ice sculpture called "The Melody of Sunset", created by participants from the city of Barnaul, during the annual International festival of snow and ice sculptures "The Magical Ice of Siberia", on an embankment of the Yenisei river, with the air temperature at about minus 26 degrees Celsius (minus 14.8 degrees Fahrenheit), in Krasnoyarsk, Siberia, Russia, January 16, 2016.
Photo by Ilya Naymushin
Former US resident George W.Bush (R-Unindicted War Criminal) may no longer be able to change the course of history -- but it has not stopped others trying for him.
To mark its 15th anniversary Friday, online encyclopedia Wikipedia released a ranking of its pages based on how many edits have been made by volunteers -- edits can mount at Wikipedia pages when people or subjects incite passion or rival perspectives.
Bush, in office from 2001 to 2009, topped the list with 45,862 edits to his Wikipedia page, coming in about 3,000 edits ahead of the World Wrestling Entertainment roster page.
The list of the top-10 most edited pages went on to include, in order, the United States, Wikipedia itself, Michael Jackson, Jesus and the Catholic Church.
Rounding out the list were programs broadcast by Philippines television network ABS-CBN, US President Barack Obama and Adolf Hitler.
Corcoran died Friday of cardiopulmonary disease at Valley Presbyterian in Van Nuys, her niece, author Mell Corcoran, told The Hollywood Reporter. The actress' younger brother, Kevin Corcoran, who appeared in the 1957 film Old Yeller and played Moochie on several Disney TV shows, died in October.
On Bachelor Father, which aired on CBS, NBC and ABC from 1957-62, the cute Corcoran starred as Kelly, who comes to live at age 13 with her well-to-do uncle Bentley Gregg (Forsythe), a Beverly Hills attorney, after her parents are killed in an automobile accident. The houseboy Peter (Sammee Tong) helps them get by.
A native of Quincy, Mass., Corcoran was the third of eight children, many of whom acted (in addition to Kevin, their sister, Donna Corcoran, appeared in the 1951 film Angels in the Outfield). The family moved to Santa Monica, and her father worked in maintenance on the MGM lot.
Brian Corcoran, another brother and child actor, died in February 2014.
In addition to her niece and sister Donna, Noreen's survivors include another sister, Kerry.
Giant panda cub Bei Bei roam in his pen as he goes on public exhibit for the first time at the National Zoo, in Washington, Saturday, Jan. 16, 2016. Smithsonian's youngest giant panda cub makes his public debut, following his birth last August.
Photo by Jose Luis Magana
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