As mentioned, I was too busy for a column this week. But Sarah Palin
took the coward's way out, and announced her resignation on a Friday,
after the main news cycle for the week and before the Sunday papers,
and in a time when The Daily Show and The Colbert Report are on
vacation.
So I issue a challenge to readers of Bartcop-E:
Submit your own Sarah Palin jokes! Why is she resigning? Is she
having a tryst while nude hiking on the Appalachian Trail with Mark
Sanford or is she meeting Brett Farve in Argentina? Does she really
insist that her 15-month-old Down's Syndrome child can speak? Why
was she so laughably incoherent in her press conference?
Send all responses to Marty, who will then forward them to me.
--////
"My method is to take the utmost trouble to find the right thing to
say, and then to say it with the utmost levity." -- George Bernard
Shaw
Susan Estrich: Thriller (creators.com)
Is there still a revolution about to happen in Iran? Is my state going to run out of money tomorrow, and start printing IOUs? Can the crazy North Koreans really attack Hawaii? Was there a coup in Honduras? Do we care? The short answer to all the above questions is - who knows? What I can tell you is that the traffic on Sunset near Michael Jackson's house is backed up. Again.
NATALIE BELL: Q+A Natalie Stewart (curvemag.com)
Natalie "The Floacist" Stewart has moved beyond her seven-time-Grammy-nominated duo, Floetry, to embark on a new solo album, Freedom, which is due out soon.
Dan the man (guardian.co.uk)
He was a boy wizard at 11, and eight years later Daniel Radcliffe has left home, found a girlfriend and grown up. He talks to Craig McLean.
DIANE ANDERSON-MINSHALL: Sandy Young's Got the Look (curvemag.com)
A lot of times when lesbians are finalists on other reality shows that are based around modeling like 'Top Model' or 'Make Me a Supermodel,' producers always show them fighting their butchy tomboy stuff. Like, here she is struggling with heels, she's not looking feminine enough on casting calls, that kind of stuff-was there any of that for you?
Corin Nemec, Star of "Parker Lewis Can't Lose" (bullz-eye.com)
On working with Francis Ford Coppola: Before that, I'd done a Suzuki motorcycle commercial and I did a McDonald's commercial. And that's it! That was the extent of my career at that point. That was a pretty big leap!
On the sitcom THE BEVERLY HILLBILLIES (CBS/1962-71) Elly May Clampett (Donna Douglas), a naive, tomboy is given a bra but thinks it is a weapon. When she shows it to her equally naive backwoods father, Jed (Buddy Ebsen) he says "Well, I'll be doggone!, a store-bought, lace-trimmed, double-barreled slingshot."
Source
Vic in AK was first, and correct, with:
over the shoulder boulder holder
mj answered:
This one is a little easier
Same as the over the shoulder boulder holder. A bra.
Charlie replied:
I believe on that show that the term referred to a bra.
Roy in Tyler, TX responded:
A double-barreled slingshot is also know as an over-the-shoulder boulder holder, milk jug cozy, and a teen-age boy's greatest challenge to remove in as short a time as possible. Or as that classic song proclaimed,
"Brassieres...
you hold the things
we hold so dear...".
From out wedding until our divorce 15 years and 4 days later, my first wife progressed from a 34-A bb-shooter, to a 36-DD cantaloupe slinger to a 34-extra long hamster-hammock. Roy Adams Tyler, TX
Jim from CA wrote:
I think it was Miss Hathaway's bra...
Alan J responded:
A Bra
PURPLE GENE answered:
A "BRA"
COMMONLY KNOWN AS "TITTY TOTERS" AND "BOOB BAGS", ON THE "BEVERLY HILLBILLIES" ELLY MAY CLAMPETT CALLED THE DEVICE A "DOUBLE BARRELED SLING SHOT"....SHE WAS OF COURSE REFERING TO......THE "BRA"!
Sally said:
Who could ever forget Jethro (who done 4th grade two TIMES) AND Elly May wearing her "double-barrel slingshot" braa zeeeer on the
"The Beverly Hillbillies?"
PS: Thank you joe b! I knew the, "Under God" clause was circa 1959, but needed that link to the "Knights of Columbus" to complete my thesis! I am tracking, "End of the World" scenarios, and other lies being passed down by people with invested interests... The "Knights" was the great clue for which I was looking!!
MAM replied:
A "double-barrel slingshot" is a store-bought, lace-trimmed, bra or so said Elly Mae Clampett, played by Donna Douglas, on The Beverly Hillbillies.
Donna Douglas as Ellie Mae Clampett
Bokeh is one of those words bandied about by photographers and it is too often assumed that people actually know what is meant when someone says that they love the bokeh of a particular shot. No need to reach for the dictionary later. Here is a brief guide to bokeh for beginners.
CBS opens the night with a RERUN'How I Met Your Mother', followed by a RERUN'Rules Of Engagement', then a RERUN'2½ Men', followed by a RERUN'Big Bang Theory', followed by a RERUN'CSI: The 2nd One'.
Scheduled on a FRESHDave are Hayden Panettiere, and Conor Oberst and the Mystic Valley Band.
Scheduled on a FRESHCraig are Eric Idle and Dr. Lisa Masterson.
NBC begins the night with a RERUN'Law & Order', followed by a RERUN'Law & Order: Criminal Intent', then 'Dateline'.
Scheduled on a FRESHConan are Howie Mandel, Alanis Morissette, and Death Cab for Cutie.
On a RERUNJimmy Fallon (from 5/12/09) are Andy Samberg, Jorge Garcia, and the Lonely Island.
On a RERUNCarson 'The Scab' Daly (from 5/6/09) are Jimmy Fallon, Mistress Mary, and Bobby Ray.
ABC starts the night with a FRESH'Bachelorette 5', followed by a FRESH'Here Come The Newlyweds'.
On a RERUNJimmy Kimmel (from 6/11/09) are Artie Lange, Adam Perry Lang, and No Doubt.
The CW offers a RERUN'One Tree Hill', followed by a RERUN'Gossip Girl'.
Faux has a RERUN'House', followed by a RERUN'Lie To Me'.
MY has a RERUN'Masters Of Illusion', followed by a RERUN'Magic's Biggest Secrets Finally Revealed'.
A&E has 'CSI: The 2nd One', 'Intervention', followed by a FRESH'Intervention', then a FRESH'Obsessed'.
AMC offers the movie 'Jumanji', followed by the movie 'The Amityville Horror', then the movie 'Exorcist: The Beginning'.
BBC -
[12:00 PM] You Are What You Eat - Episode 17
[12:30 PM] You Are What You Eat - Episode 1
[1:00 PM] How Clean Is Your House? US - Episode 8
[1:30 PM] How Clean Is Your House? - Episode 10
[2:00 PM] Ramsay's Kitchen Nightmares - Ep 8 Peter's
[3:00 PM] Gordon Ramsay's F Word - Episode 4
[4:00 PM] The Hotel Inspector - Episode 5
[5:00 PM] Gordon Ramsay's F Word - Episode 5
[6:00 PM] Ramsay's Kitchen Nightmares Revisited - Ep 3 Moore Place
[7:00 PM] BBC World News America
[8:00 PM] Top Gear - Episode 4
[9:00 PM] Top Gear - Episode 3
[10:00 PM] BBC World News America
[11:00 PM] Top Gear - Episode 4
[12:00 AM] Top Gear - Episode 3
[1:00 AM] Top Gear - Episode 4
[2:00 AM] Top Gear - Episode 6
[3:00 AM] The Graham Norton Show - Ep 8 Glenn Close, Alan Carr and Amy Macdonald
[4:00 AM] How Clean Is Your House? US - Episode 8
[4:30 AM] How Clean Is Your House? - Episode 10
[5:00 AM] BBC World News
[6:00 AM] BBC World News (ALL TIMES EDT)
Bravo has 'Kathy Griffin: My Life On The D-List'. another 'Kathy Griffin: My Life On The D-List', still another 'Kathy Griffin: My Life On The D-List', followed by a FRESH'Kathy Griffin: My Life On The D-List'.
Comedy Central has 'Scrubs', another 'Scrubs', an old 'Jon Stewart', an old 'Colbert Report', followed by the movie 'Tommy Boy'.
On a RERUNJon Stewart (from 7/1/09) is Justin Fox.
On a RERUNColbert Report (from 6/30/09) are Alexi Lalas and Kevin Mattson.
FX has the movie 'Ice Age: The Meltdown', followed by the movie 'Click'.
History has 'Modern Marvels', 'Crime Wave: 18 Months Of Mayhem', and 'St. Valentine's Day Massacre'.
IFC -
[6:45 AM] Dim Sum: A Little Bit of Heart
[8:15 AM] Double Happiness
[9:45 AM] Mondays in the Sun
[11:45 AM] Dim Sum: A Little Bit of Heart
[1:15 PM] Double Happiness
[2:45 PM] Mondays in the Sun
[4:45 PM] Dim Sum: A Little Bit of Heart
[6:15 PM] Millions
[8:00 PM] I'm Gonna Git You Sucka
[9:30 PM] Even Cowgirls Get the Blues
[11:15 PM] Running With the Bulls
[12:00 AM] Last Days
[1:45 AM] From the Basement
[2:00 AM] The Henry Rollins Show
[2:30 AM] The Henry Rollins Show
[3:00 AM] Z Rock
[3:30 AM] Z Rock
[4:00 AM] Millions
[5:45 AM] Melinda and Melinda (ALL TIMES EDT)
SciFi has the movie 'Pirates Of The Caribbean: The Curse Of The Black Pearl', followed by the movie 'National Treasure'.
Sundance -
[06:00 AM] You're Gonna Miss Me
[07:35 AM] The Man Who Became King
[09:00 AM] Heavy Metal in Baghdad
[10:30 AM] Gay Muslims
[11:25 AM] Muhammad Ali, the Greatest
[01:15 PM] You're Gonna Miss Me
[02:50 PM] The Man Who Became King
[04:05 PM] Heavy Metal in Baghdad
[05:30 PM] The Wild Horse Redemption
[07:05 PM] Blood, Sweat + Gears
[08:45 PM] I Want to Be a Pilot
[09:00 PM] Obscene: A Portrait Of Barney
[10:45 PM] Muhammad Ali, the Greatest
[12:45 AM] Fido
[02:20 AM] I Want to Be a Pilot
[02:35 AM] Volver
[04:45 AM] Gay Muslims
[05:40 AM] Death to the Tinman (ALL TIMES EDT)
U.S. music producer Quincy Jones welcomes Chinese pianist Lang Lang (L) before his show with pianist Herbie Hancock during the 43rd Montreux Jazz Festival in Montreux July 5, 2009.
Photo by Valentin Flauraud
The global recession, shrinking advertising sales and fears that the Internet could render big media empires obsolete provide an ominous backdrop for executives at this week's Sun Valley conference.
Herb Allen's boutique investment bank Allen & Co has organized this retreat in the affluent mountain resort town in south-central Idaho every summer for 27 years, inviting guests such as Rupert Murdoch, Sumner Redstone and Barry Diller.
This year's conference from July 7-12 will feature panel discussions, including likely themes from globalization to U.S. President Barack Obama's handling of the financial crisis.
But the real action will be deal action. Last year, Sun Valley was about Microsoft Corp's failed bid to buy Yahoo Inc.
Jazz legend Dave Brubeck performs at the 30th edition of the Montreal International Jazz Festival Saturday, July 4, 2009 in Montreal.
Photo by Paul Chiasson
One of the impoverished child stars from "Slumdog Millionaire" will move from his shanty home in one of Mumbai's more wretched slums into a new apartment next week, his mother said Sunday.
"On Friday we got the keys," said Shameem Ismail, the mother of child star Azharuddin Mohammed Ismail, who played the young Salim in the Oscar-winning hit.
The family started moving in over the weekend, bringing pots and pans, a television set, and their birdcage. They plan to fully relocate by Tuesday, she said.
Both Azhar and his co-star Rubina Ali lost their homes in May after civic authorities demolished parts of the slum where they lived.
"Slumdog Millionaire" has grossed over $350 million worldwide.
France on Friday rejected a report by the European Union's food safety watchdog that said a controversial strain of genetically-modified corn was safe.
In a joint statement, the French ecology and agriculture ministries said the Italy-based European Food Safety Authority (EFSA) had failed to take into account requests to change the way it evaluated the risk.
France and five other EU members -- Austria, Germany, Greece, Hungary and Luxembourg -- have suspended sowing of Monsanto's MON810 maize, invoking safeguard clauses on the grounds of potential environmental hazard.
Genetically-modified crops are widely grown in North America, South America and China.
But in Europe they have run into fierce resistance, led by green groups who say the crops carry risks through cross-pollination, potentially creating "super-weeds" that are impervious to herbicides.
Sen.-elect Al Franken poses for photos with Eveleth residents during the Fourth of July parade July 4, 2009 in Eveleth, Minn. Franken also attended the Nashwauk, Keewatin, and Biwabik parades.
Photo by Elizabeth Flores
The surviving parts of the world's oldest Christian bible will be reunited online on Monday, generating excitement among biblical scholars still striving to unlock its mysteries.
The Codex Sinaiticus was hand written by four scribes in Greek on animal hide, known as vellum, in the mid-fourth century around the time of the Roman emperor Constantine the Great who embraced Christianity.
Not all of it has withstood the ravages of time, but the pages that have include the whole of the New Testament and the earliest surviving copy of the Gospels written at different times after Christ's death by four of the Apostles: Matthew, Mark, Luke and John.
The bible's remaining 800 pages and fragments -- it was originally some 1400 pages long -- also contain half of a copy of the Old Testament. The other half has been lost.
The ancient parchments, which appear almost translucent, are a collection of sections held by the British Library in London, the Monastery of St. Catherine in Sinai, Egypt, the National Library of Russia and Leipzig University Library in Germany.
The Washington Post's publisher apologized to readers Sunday for a plan to charge business leaders and lobbyists for intimate dinner discussions with government officials and the newspaper's journalists.
A flier surfaced last week promoting a plan to charge $25,000 to sponsor one of a series of dinner parties that would include off-the-record conversations with Post journalists and access to Washington insiders. The series was canceled Thursday.
"I want to apologize for a planned new venture that went off track and for any cause we may have given you to doubt our independence and integrity," Publisher Katharine Weymouth said in a letter that appeared in the newspaper's op-ed section Sunday.
Weymouth said the flier wasn't approved by her or the paper's editors, and that it didn't accurately describe the plan for the small gatherings.
Professional player Phil Hellmuth waves to fans as he is carried into the Rio Hotel and Casino in Las Vegas on the third day of the World Series of Poker on Sunday, July 5, 2009.
Photo by Laura Rauch
Two monorail trains crashed early Sunday morning in the Magic Kingdom section of Walt Disney World, killing one train's operator, emergency officials said.
The transit system, which shuttles thousands of visitors around the sprawling resort each day, was shut down while authorities investigated the holiday weekend wreck.
The monorail operator died at the scene of the crash, which happened around 2 a.m., said Bo Jones, deputy chief for Reedy Creek Fire Department. The other train operator was not injured, but was taken to a hospital because he was emotionally shaken. Jones said five park guests were treated at the scene, though the Orange County Sheriff's office said six were treated.
Disney Vice President of Communications Michael Griffin identified the driver as 21-year-old Austin Wuennenberg. Griffin would not discuss how long Wuennenberg had been with Disney or the circumstances surrounding the crash. Disney officials also refused to talk about how the monorail system operates.
A U.S. Coast Guard helicopter has rescued a French kayaker who became fatigued in the Bering Sea during his quest to circumnavigate the world.
Jean-Gabriel Chelala contacted authorities from his kayak Saturday after he encountered several days of rough waters and became too weak to paddle through the currents.
A Jayhawk helicopter airlifted Chelala from his specialized kayak about 40 miles off the coast of Alaska's St. Lawrence Island and flew him to Nome, where he was treated for mild hypothermia, the Coast Guard said. The kayak was abandoned.
The 28-year-old has been attempting to circle the globe through human power - bicycling and kayaking. He left France by bike in January 2008, kayaked across the Atlantic Ocean to Florida and then pedaled from Florida to Alaska, according to his Web site.
An aerial view of the annual Song and Dance Celebration 2009 in Tallinn, Estonia, on Saturday, July 4, 2009. More than 26,000 choir singers participated in a mass celebration of folk songs.
Photo by Timur Nisametdinov
Notice anything exceptional about today's date? It's July 5, 2009 (05/07/09) -- and three consecutive odd numbers make up the date only five times in a century.
This nugget is pointed out by Californian high school maths teacher Ron Gordon, a self-confessed "mathemagician".
"That's what my kids call me, because I make something out of nothing from maths," the 64-year-old told AFP in a phone interview from his home in Redwood City.
"This really is a day to celebrate. OK, it's true there will be another one in two years' time on September 7, 2011 (07/09/11), and one on November 9, 2013 (09/11/13) but then it won't happen again for 92 years. And I sure won't be around to see it."
Prehistoric creatures and robots are in a photo finish for the Fourth of July box-office crown.
The studios behind "Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen" and "Ice Age: Dawn of the Dinosaurs" are reporting their movies in a tie for the No. 1 spot with $42.5 million in ticket sales each.
Numbers reported over the weekend are estimates based on the studio's projections for how much business the movies will do on Sunday. Final numbers Monday will sort out which movie actually came in first, Paramount's "Transformers" or 20th Century Fox's "Ice Age."
Johnny Depp and Christian Bale's gangster epic "Public Enemies" debuted a solid No. 3 with $26.2 million.
Masahiro Tomiyama, a staff member of Sunshine City International Aquarium, holds baby fennecs, who were born in mid-May, in Tokyo, Saturday, July 4, 2009.
Photo by Koji Sasahara
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Make yourself home, take your shoes off...
Go ahead, scratch it if it itches.
The idea is to have fun.
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Anything that increased your blood pressure, or, even better,
amused or entertained?
Do you have a great album no one's heard?
How about a favorite TV show, movie, book, play, cartoon, or legal amusement?
A popular artist that just plain pisses you off?
A box set the whole world should own?
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Just plain vile, filthy rumors?
This is your place.
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