10: It's a
Horrible Life: Clarence the angel gets his wings after convincing
George W. Bailey to kill himself by showing him how absolutely fantastic the
world would have been had he never been born.
9: The Polar
Espresso: Elves from around the world are kidnapped and forced to
work at the first Starbucks at the North Pole.
8: How the
Magnanimous Billionaire Gave Away Christmas: A mad billionaire
hires minions to sneak into people's houses and replace the gifts around the
tree with much better ones.
7: Homo
Alone: I really don't want to see this. What was I thinking? You
go see it.
6: Elf
Realization: Che Elf rouses the toy workers to overthrow their
hefty master. Siddhartha Elf finds enlightenment.
5: The Nightmare
After Christmas: A swamped clerk at a Wal-Mart's return desk
kidnaps shoppers and opens an underground slave department where illegal
aliens can buy white people.
4: The Little Shop
Around the Coroner: Law and Order meets CSI
meets Bones meets Love, Actually, with a bit of Die
Hard and Eyes Wide Shut thrown in.
3: Rudolph the
Normal-Nosed Reindeer: There's nothing special about Rudolph so he
never guides Santa's sleigh or ever really amounts to anything.
Nobody writes a song about him and he dies in obscurity.
2: Disaster on
34th Street: Santa is hijacked by elf terrorists who crash his
sleigh into Macy's which mysteriously comes crumbling down in what many claim
must have been a controlled demolition. The US declares war on the North Pole
and blows up a Starbucks. Gimbels has its biggest week ever.
and the number one Christmas movie I want to see...
1. The Most Improbable Story Ever Told: A virgin
who appears on tortillas gives birth to a man who can walk on water. Starring
Jesus Saves (pronounced Hey-soos Sah-vess.)
Garrison Keillor: A Nebraska Christmas angel works her magic in N.Y.
My little girl was born within a week of Christmas and, believe you me, conceiving one to hatch on target like that is no simple task. It takes planning and biotechnology, and the male is force-fed raw oysters, and the female must hang upside down in a dark room for hours.
Tom Danehy: Welcome to the 2009 edition of the Best of Danehy
Best Quote: Pro-bulimia spokesperson Kate Moss told a bunch of aspiring models, "Nothing tastes as good as skinny feels." Having been skinny for an extended part of my life (no, really!), I can tell you that's nonsense. In fact, the only two foods that don't taste better than skinny feels are broccoli and low-fat broccoli.
"Eating Animals: by Jonathan Safran Foer: A review by Scott F. Parker
What do we value more, our morals or our pleasure and convenience? Or try this formulation: is having inexpensive meat worth the torture of billions of sentient animals a year, the destruction of the environment, and the proliferation of disease and ill health? That's what's at stake in our diets these days, and that's what Jonathan Safran Foer's 'Eating Animals' asks us to ask ourselves: how much do we care about what we care about? Enough to change?
roger ebert's journal: The best films of 2009
Since Moses brought the tablets down from the mountain, lists have come in tens, not that we couldn't have done with several more commandments.
Will Harris: "Ben Henson: Creator of "Farscape" (bullz-eye.com)
I still feel like the comedy moments in ('Farscape') make for one of the most delicious elements of the series, the fact that, at times, it really does get a little bit outrageous and absurd in a way that makes you laugh.
Ask Joe Weider (creators.com)
Tip of the Week: Sure, I'll be the first to tell you that consistency is essential to achieving change in your body. For as long as I can remember, I've preached the importance of staying focused, with your eye on the prize, and making sure to stick to both your diet and workout plan if you want to see progress beyond that of the tens of thousands who aren't so diligent as you.
President Obama says, "We are on the cusp of making health care reform a reality,"
Others say it is merely an expansion of health care insurance opportunities with little reform of the present system. Meanwhile, insurance stocks rocket skyward on the NYSE... Help me out here, would ya? What do you think?
Here, by the way, is a totally negative opinion of the whole shebang by a progressive, not a Rethug.
In 2002, the Ramones were ranked the second-greatest band of all time by Spin magazine, trailing only The Beatles
Source
Alan J was first, and correct, with:
The Ramones
Charlie wrote:
They were a great band, though I wouldn't rate them quite that high. Some no doubt prefer them to the Beatles, however.
The Ramones.
Jim from CA, retired to ID, answered:
Merry Christmas Marty and all.....the Ramones
Sally said:
(Sob, sob), in 2002 (moan, sob), the second-greatest band of all time (huge sniffle, sob, sob), by Spin magazine (sob, sob), was, "The Ramones" (sob, sniffle, sob)...
Missing Marty already...
PS: Merry Christmas, my BCE friends, sob, sob, sob...
PPS: Great idea, MAM, though in the same financial boat as you, I'm in! How about the other readers?? We can do it, gang!!
-pgw responded:
The Ramones
Marry X-mas.
MAM noted:
The Ramones were ranked as the second-greatest band of all time by Spin magazine in 2002.
Marian the teacher replied:
the Ramones
And, Joe S responded:
Marty send me an address by e-mail and I'll send you a check. I don't do PayPal for personal reasons. Everybody else---send Marty some money! Marty, consider maybe 3 or 4 or 5 pages a week instead of 7. Give yourself a little break, you know if you get enough money. People! Send Marty some money!
Ok, today's question. The answer is the Ramones. THE RAMONES!!?? THE RAMONES!!?? I detest the Ramones! I would rank them second from the WORST band ever, one better than these guys..
FUCK SOUTHERN CHRISTIAN TEABAGGER BIRTHER GAY BASHING GUN TOTING TWITS, MORANS AND MISANTHROPES (IF YOU DONT KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS...THEN YOU'RE ONE)
YOU'RE ALL GOING TO HELL....I ASKED JESUS MYSELF....
ON THIS DAY OF GIVING....I WOULD LOVE TO GIVE A LIBERAL KICK IN THE ASS TO EVERY ONE OF YOU REDICULOUSLY RIGHTEOUS REPUBLICAN ASSHOLES.
AS YOU BOW YOUR HEADS IN YOUR CHURCH, BE HAPPY FOR THE 31 MILLION AMERICANS THAT WILL SOON BE GETTING HEALTH CARE ...IN SPITE OF YOUR ASSININE EFFORT TO SHUT THEM OUT, KICK THEM TO THE CURB AND WATCH THEM DIE.
"WHAT WOULD JESUS DO" ????????
EXACTLY WHAT THE DEMOCRATS DID IN THE SENATE....FEED THE HUNGRY, HEAL THE SICK AND HELP THE LESS FORTUNATE!
PEACE ON EARTH AND GOOD WILL TO ALL!
PURPLE GENE
PS
IT WAS NOT NANCY PELOSI OR BARBARA BOXER THAT KNOCKED THE POPE ON HIS ASS IN THE VATICAN YESTERDAY.....IT WAS BARBARA BUSH!
Thanks to Purple Gene, that Madcat, JD, Linda, BadtotheboneBob, Sally, Erik, Leo, Tim, David, and Sally (again) for the support.
While there wasn't a Christmas miracle, I am very grateful to the readers who have helped out.
Not out of the woods yet - please help save the e-page.
Yeah, the timing sucks - welcome to my life. : )
Please save the e-page while there's time!
Tonight, Friday:
CBS opens the night with a RERUN'Ghost Whisperer', followed by a RERUN'Medium', then a RERUN'Numb3rs'.
On a RERUNDave from (12/16/09) are Robert Downey Jr., Martin Short, and Kris Allen.
On a RERUNCraig (from 12/4/09) are Emily Blunt, and David Bianculli.
NBC begins the night with last week's 'SNL: A Very Gilly Christmas', followed by a RERUN'Leno' ((from 11/4/09) Jenna Bush Hager, Laura 'Pickles' Bush, and Sebastian Maniscalo).
On a RERUNConan (from 9/17/09) are Megan Fox, Louis CK, and Kevin Skinner.
On a RERUNJimmy Fallon (from 12/11/09) are Mary Steenburgen and Snoop Dogg.
On a RERUNCarson 'The Scab' Daly (from 10/30/09) are Masi Oka, Danny Setiawan, and Doves.
ABC fills the night with the movie 'Pirates Of The Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest'.
On a RERUNJimmy Kimmel (from 12/4/09) are Don Rickles, Anika Noni Rose, and Band of Skulls.
The CW offers a RERUN'Smallville', followed by 'Grandma Got Run Over By A Reindeer'.
Faux has a RERUN'Til Death', followed by another RERUN'Til Death', then still another 'Til Death', followed by yet another RERUN'Til Death'.
MY fills the night with a FRESH'WWE Friday Night Steroid SmackDown!'.
PLEASE check local PBS listings for a FRESH'Bill Moyers Journal', the BEST program on over-the-air TV.
AMC offers the movie 'National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation' all night.
BBC -
[12:00 PM] The Catherine Tate Show Christmas Special 2
[12:40 PM] Are You Being Served? Christmas Special 1975
[1:20 PM] Keeping Up Appearances Christmas Special
[2:00 PM] Absolutely Fabulous Christmas Special
[2:40 PM] The Catherine Tate Show Christmas Special
[3:20 PM] The Catherine Tate Show Christmas Special 2
[4:00 PM] Gavin & Stacey Christmas Special
[5:00 PM] Arthur
[7:00 PM] BBC World News
[7:30 PM] Are You Being Served? Christmas Special 1975
[8:00 PM] The Great Escape
[12:00 AM] The Great Escape
[4:00 AM] How Clean Is Your House? US - Episode 21
[4:30 AM] How Clean Is Your House? - Episode 1
[5:00 AM] How Clean Is Your House? US - Episode 22
[5:30 AM] How Clean Is Your House? - Episode 2
[6:00 AM] Cash in the Attic - Ep 16 Panter (ALL TIMES EST)
Bravo has the movie 'Guesa Who', followed by the movie 'The 40-Year Old Virgin'.
Comedy Central has the movie 'Waiting...', followed by the movie 'Still Waiting'.
FX has the movie 'Deck The Halls', followed by the movie 'Home Alone', then the movie 'Deck The Halls'.
History has 'UFO Files'< 'Angels & Demons Decoded', and 'Ancient Aliens'.
IFC -
[7:25 AM] Danny Deckchair
[9:15 AM] Broadway Danny Rose
[10:45 AM] Dinner Rush
[12:30 PM] Danny Deckchair
[2:15 PM] Broadway Danny Rose
[3:45 PM] Dinner Rush
[5:30 PM] Bright Young Things
[7:20 PM] Blood and Wine
[9:05 PM] Buddy Boy
[11:00 PM] Monty Python's Flying Circus
[11:30 PM] Arrested Development
[12:00 AM] Kill Bill: Vol. 2
[2:20 AM] Food Party
[2:30 AM] Blood and Wine
[4:15 AM] Buddy Boy (ALL TIMES EST)
Sundance -
[05:40 AM] Madame Tutli Putli
[06:00 AM] 13 Tzameti
[07:30 AM] Zebraman
[09:30 AM] Opening Night
[12:00 PM] 13 Tzameti
[01:30 PM] Zebraman
[03:30 PM] Opening Night
[06:00 PM] Death to the Tinman
[06:15 PM] Everything's Gone Green
[08:00 PM] Shameless Season 5: Episode 5
[09:00 PM] Fido | Directed by: Andrew Currie
[10:35 PM] Be Quiet
[11:00 PM] Live From Abbey Road - Season 2: Sheryl Crow, Hard-Fi & Diana Krall
[12:00 AM] Monterey Pop
[01:25 AM] Saturn In Opposition
[03:15 AM] Live From Abbey Road - Season 2: Sheryl Crow, Hard-Fi & Diana Krall
[04:15 AM] Oldboy (ALL TIMES EST)
SyFy has the movie 'Serenity', followed by the movie 'Total Recall'.
Grammy-winner Jose Feliciano has gotten an apology after accusing a pair of right-wing radio producers of trashing the spirit of Christmas by using his popular holiday song, "Feliz Navidad," for a racist musical spoof about undocumented immigrants.
Feliciano released a statement Wednesday saying that he was "revolted beyond words" and that the song was never meant to be "a vehicle for a political platform of racism and hate."
The parody, titled "The Illegal Alien Christmas Song," was created by radio producers and writers Matt Fox and A.J. Rice and was posted in mid-December on the Web site for Human Events, a Washington-based conservative weekly publication founded in 1944.
One passage from the parody, sung in English, riffed on the stereotype of Latino immigrants as heavy drinkers, while another said "illegals" were going to "spread bubonic plague."
Hear the one about the comedians who went looking for a warm spot to perform in February? They wound up in northern Michigan, where snowfall tops 100 inches a year... Actually, this is no joke. Filmmaker Michael Moore, who started
a summer film festival five years ago in his adopted hometown of Traverse City, is teaming with Emmy winner Jeff Garlin to organize a mid-winter comedic counterpart...
Disney has joined in making jokes at the expense of Tiger Woods even as a new poll shows the embattled billionaire golf star's popularity sinking to levels usually reserved for politicians.
Woods has remained in seclusion since the sex scandal firestorm around him began four weeks ago and faces a Christmas holiday weekend and 34th birthday next Wednesday, what should be joyful times, as a mocked social pariah.
Disneyland's California Adventure Park in Anaheim has now written a Woods joke into its Aladdin show.
The genie in the tale says that he had to remind Woods 15 times that he was unable to make someone fall in love with him, the Los Angeles Times reported.
This early Dec. 2009 photo provided by the Illinois River Biological Station via the Detroit Free Press shows Illinois River silver carp jump out of the water after being disturbed by sounds of watercraft. Many fear that the Asian carp, which can reach 4 feet long and weigh up to 100 pounds, will wreak havoc, not by attacking native fish, but starving them out by gobbling up plankton. Michigan asked the U.S. Supreme Court on Monday, Dec. 21, 2009 to close shipping locks near Chicago to prevent the carp from invading the Great Lakes and endangering their $7 billion fishery.
Photo by Nerissa Michaels
Cher's six-bedroom Hawaii home overlooking the Pacific Ocean is set to be auctioned Jan. 18.
Concierge Auctions estimated the three-quarter-acre property with views of the Hualalai Golf Course was worth about $8 million to $12 million.
A Web site set up for the sale says the property has a main residence and five freestanding bungalows totaling 8,821 square feet. Four have bedroom suites, and the fifth is a media bungalow with a bar.
In all, it has six bedrooms, six bathrooms and two half baths.
A couple who said they were assaulted by Gene Simmons sued the KISS bassist for unspecified damages Thursday, court records show.
Nathan Marlowe and his wife Cynthia Manzo said Simmons attacked them, threatened them and took their video camera at the upscale The Grove mall on Saturday after they started filming the rocker.
The couple's attorney, Matthew Nezhad, says a police report was filed. The couple sought a restraining order against Simmons on Wednesday, but that petition was denied.
According to the complaint and restraining order application, Marlowe asked Simmons for his view on monogamy, and Simmons responded by telling Marlowe to get his shot and leave. The filings state Simmons then lunged and attacked Marlowe, taking the video camera, then turned on Manzo when she tried to get the camera back.
The couple are seeking damages of more than $25,000 for civil claims of assault, battery and infliction of emotional distress. The lawsuit was filed as a verified complaint, meaning Marlowe and Manzo signed it under penalty of perjury.
Sex worker Atenas poses for a portrait as she works in an empty night club in downtown Tijuana, Mexico, Friday, Dec. 4, 2009. Mexico's drug war and the economic crisis are keeping tourists from the once busiest party streets, forcing some bars to shut down.
Photo by Rodrigo Abd
Rankings for the top 15 programs on cable networks as compiled by the Nielsen Co. for the week of Dec. 14-20. Day and start time (EST) are in parentheses:
1. NFL Football: Arizona vs. San Francisco (Monday, 8:30 p.m.), ESPN, 9.52 million homes, 13.07 million viewers.
2. NFL Football: Dallas vs. New Orleans (Saturday, 8:22 p.m.), NFL Network, 6.59 million homes, 10.49 million viewers.
3. NFL Football: Indianapolis vs. Jacksonville (Thursday, 8:22 p.m.), NFL Network, 4.36 million homes, 6.39 million viewers.
4. "The Closer" (Monday, 9 p.m.), TNT, 4.1 million homes, 5.45 million viewers.
5. "SpongeBob SquarePants" (Saturday, 9:30 a.m.), Nickelodeon, 3.54 million homes, 4.73 million viewers.
6. "NCIS" (Wednesday, 8 p.m.), USA, 3.45 million homes, 4.79 million viewers.
7. "WWE Raw" (Monday, 9 p.m.), USA, 3.44 million homes, 5.34 million viewers.
8. "Pre-Kick" (Saturday, 8 p.m.), NFL Network, 3.42 million homes, 5.46 million viewers.
9. "WWE Raw" (Monday, 10 p.m.), USA, 3.41 million homes, 5.43 million viewers.
10. "Men of a Certain Age" (Monday, 10 p.m.), TNT, 3.23 million homes, 4.42 million viewers.
11. "NCIS" (Wednesday, 9 p.m.), USA, 3.17 million homes, 4.3 million viewers.
12. "Penguins of Madagascar" (Saturday, 10 a.m.), Nickelodeon, 3.13 million homes, 4.12 million viewers.
13. "Keeping up With the Kardashians" (Sunday, 10 p.m.), E! Entertainment, 3.08 million homes, 4.23 million viewers.
14. "NCIS" (Thursday, 7:30 p.m.), USA, 3.06 million homes, 4.13 million viewers.
15. "SpongeBob SquarePants" (Saturday, 9 a.m.), Nickelodeon, 3.02 million homes, 3.96 million viewers.
James Gurley, the brilliant lead guitarist for Big Brother and the Holding Company, the psychedelic rock band that propelled Janis Joplin to fame, has died in California at age 69.
Surviving members of Big Brother said Gurley died Sunday in a Palm Springs hospital after suffering a heart attack.
Gurley melded a wild, self-taught finger-picking style with a creative genius for customizing electric guitars and amplifiers. Albin says Gurley revolutionized lead guitar sounds and influenced practically every other guitarist of the era.
Gurley died two days before his 70th birthday. He is survived by his wife and two sons.
Deer stand together in snow covered woods, Thursday, Dec. 24, 2009, in Des Moines, Iowa. A major winter storm lumbering across the nation's midsection promised a white Christmas for some but brought headaches for travelers caught on slick, icy roads or dealing with canceled and delayed flights.
Photo by Charlie Neibergall
You have reached the Home page of BartCop Entertainment.
Make yourself home, take your shoes off...
Go ahead, scratch it if it itches.
The idea is to have fun.
Do you have something to say?
Anything that increased your blood pressure, or, even better,
amused or entertained?
Do you have a great album no one's heard?
How about a favorite TV show, movie, book, play, cartoon, or legal amusement?
A popular artist that just plain pisses you off?
A box set the whole world should own?
Vile, filthy rumors about Republican musicians?
Just plain vile, filthy rumors?
This is your place.
noted:
PURPLE GENE'S CHRISTMAS LOVE MESSAGE:
