BartCop Entertainment Archives - Tuesday, 30 November, 2004

Tuesday

30 November, 2004

big hammer - bigger hammer

(Updated Daily)

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Issue #130

Disinfotainment Today

By Michael Dare



Issue #130
is brought to you by

U.S. Foreign Policy

 
The Brain Monologues
 
    I'm a Jew living in the United States of America, and I think that Jews living in Israel have a right to a homeland where they can live free from tyranny and oppression, NOT because we're the chosen people and God is a real estate developer who gave a piece of land to us, but because everybody on earth has a right to a homeland where they can live free from tyranny and oppression, including Palestinians. It's a useless rule if it doesn't apply to everybody.
    I think we all need to be here, every last one of us. I wouldn't kill the last Negro or Jew or yes, even Republican, any more than I'd kill the last eagle or firefly or gnat. I think there's a distinction between everything and there are no laws that apply to everybody. I think it's okay to contradict yourself.
    Nothing disturbs me more than people talking about "wiping them out," whoever they are, or more precisely, whoever "them" is: Muslim or Hindu, Israeli or Palestinian, Arab or Protestant, evolutionary dilettante or creationist lesbian, macho scuzzbag or sniveling wino, goddam it, like Gandhi said, there's room for all of us.
    Hatred starts out small and grows and grows. War is the ultimate overreaction, the acme of escalation. There's no further way to express anger. The only place you can go after war is peace.
    If the only justification for violence is self-defense, then the only question is "who's the aggressor?" Might I postulate that currently, everywhere on earth, the guys with the tanks are the aggressors? Tanks aren't defensive. They're for gaining ground. Gaining ground is offensive, not defensive.
    The only reason they're shooting at us is because we're there. If we weren't there, they wouldn't be shooting at us. Pretty simple. One man's terrorist is another man's freedom fighter. Why aren't they shooting at us in Vietnam? Because we left. The decision to stay in Iraq until they stop shooting at us is pure madness and uncut arrogance. They'll never stop shooting at us as long as we're there.
    I don't burst into people's homes on Christmas eve and destroy their Christmas trees because I think the cult of Christ is a crock of shit. And I don't invade foreign countries and impose political systems upon them that don't even work here, systems my own country gave up years ago.
    We're like a used car lot, Uncle Sam's Previously Owned Political Systems. Get your democracies while they're hot, on sale, this week, now remodified, without that pesky electoral college. And, if you act now, you get a free embassy. Can't afford a staff? Don't worry, we'll supply the staff. And for that extra veneer of pseudo-legitimacy, what dictator can afford to be without a collection of touchscreen voting machines that guarantee the required results in any country's election.
    Hey, Ukraine. Remove all "suspicion" that your elections are fixed by fixing then incontrovertibly - with some brand new Diebold voting machines, made right here in the US of A. We not only outsource democracy but the hardware or software to subvert it.
    Why would the citizens of ANY country want a system like that? Only a dictator would think like that. Only somebody obsessed with gaining control at any cost would think like that. It's got nothing to do with humanity, the only race we all belong to.
 
"When I was young I admired clever people. Now that I am old, I admire kind people."
- Abraham Joshua Heschel -
 
Justifying Whoopi
 
We all heard the story. Whoopi Goldberg said something obscene about the president so she was fired as spokesperson for Slim-Fast. The comment was apparently so obscene that nobody, and I mean nobody, printed it. I've gotten pretty goddam good at finding things that are well hidden, I searched forever, and I couldn't find one single source, in print or online, that dared to print whatever the hell horrible thing that Whoopi said.
 
It took David Letterman to get to the bottom of things. He had Whoopi as a guest this week and kept badgering her to confess what she actually said, and she said it.
 
It was nothing. It turns out the reason big media didn't print what she said isn't because it was too obscene to print but because it was so innocuous it made anybody who would be offended by it look like a total jerk, which wasn't quite the story they were selling. It was the strangest example of censorship I've ever seen. Whoopi was censored because what she said WASN'T obscene but a simple double entendre.
 
"After I greeted everyone, I said look, I love bush, I've always loved bush, but someone's given bush a bad name, someone's misled the country, someone's not telling the truth, and I think it's time to put bush back where it rightfully belongs, and I don't mean the White House. Get out and vote. That's what I said... That was it. People were on the floor 'cause it was funny 'cause I, you know, acted it. But apparently people decided that there was something vulgar about that, and all you had to really do was say Whoopi said something vulgar and people will take it at face value that I did it. When I asked all these newspapers and news people to put out what I said, because we sent it to them immediately, nobody wanted to because it wasn't a good news story then. It was boring."
- Whoopi Goldberg on David Letterman, 11/24/04 -
 
"[O]n March 10, 2003, while she was guest hosting for David Letterman, Whoopi Goldberg's monologue included this line: 'All this war talk has gotten me upset, but it's not a surprise because we are led by a Bush, a Dick and a Colin.' No uproar, no protests, no righteous (or right-wing) indignation."
 
Stick it Where the Sun Don't Shine
(in a school library)
One of many excellent disclaimer stickers for textbooks.
 
Gonorrhea Lecthim

    The Center for Disease Control has issued a warning about a new virulent strain of sexually transmitted disease. This disease is contracted through dangerous and high risk behavior. The disease is called Gonorrhea lecthim (pronounced "gonna re-elect him").
    Many victims have contracted it after having been screwed for the past 4 years, and in spite of having taken measures to protect themselves from this especially virulent disease.
    Cognitive sequellae of individuals infected with Gonorrhea lecthim include, but are not limited to: Anti-social personality disorder traits; delusions of grandeur with a distinct messianic flavor; chronic mangling of the English language; extreme cognitive dissonance; inability to incorporate new information; pronounced xenophobia; inability to accept responsibility for actions; exceptional cowardice masked by acts of misplaced bravado; ignorance of geography and history; tendencies toward creating evangelical theocracies; and a strong propensity for categorical, all-or nothing behavior.
- Daily Kos -
 
Helen's Only Appearance This Week
 
Sophistimicated Doowackies of the Week
 
What could be simpler than Building a better Bush?
 
I like games that are deceptively simple and turn out to be a bitch, like this one.
 
"5 Most Dangerous Toys" List Released
If you have any of these, return them at once to place of purchase.
1.   So You Want to Be a Sword Swallower (Choking hazard)
2.   My First Taser (Instruction booklet confusing)
3.   Little Miss Makeover Kit (Prosthetic breasts prone to leak)
4.   Mr. Electric Chair (Shock danger)
5.   Fun With Euthanasia (Antidote not included)
 
- Ironic Times -

Bumpersticker of the Week
 
Support those of our troops who haven't committed atrocities
 
Stupid Answers of the Week
 
What films would be good for Dubya to watch on acid with a contraption holding his eyes open?

I highly recommend forcing Furious George to watch Dr. Strangelove. Never mind. Karl Rove's got the Director's Cut and thinks it's a how-to video. I was also going to suggest a long soak in the tub with Catch-22 until I realized Cheney has apparently read it already and mistook M&M Enterprises for a business model. Hence Halliburton.
- Bob -
 
    Besides the obvious - Fahrenheit 9/11, everything by Robert Greenwald, and 1984, both the John Hurt/Richard Burton and the older Edmund O'Brien versions - here are a few other films Our Beloved Emperor should be forced to watch and the probable result:
    1. Oliver Stone's Wall Street. Unfortunately, Dubya will probably sympathize with Michael Douglas' Gordon Gecko. Maybe he'll stick "greed is good" is some subsequent speeches.
    2. Citizen Kane. Knowing our Boy Blunder, he'll likely think "Rosebud" is Susan Alexander's clitoris, and drool about it.
    3. The Candidate. Like Dan Quayle, Bush Lite will undoubtedly consider it a "how-to" guide.
    4. Elmer Gantry. This may not work so well, either, as the former Texas Rangers cheerleader will probably be anxiously waiting for the ball players to appear in the cornfield.
    5. Close Encounters of the Third Kind. The lesson that you can actually enter another nation's airspace and pay a friendly visit without bombing them into submission first will be lost on the Accidental President.
    6. Mr. Smith Goes to Washington. Likely reaction: "What's wrong with that dumb-ass lib'rul Jimmy Stewart gettin' in the way of good legislation? I oughta send my budget man down to talk to him. Wha -- Stewart's dead?!"
    7. Full Metal Jacket. To Lt. Champaign Squadron, who boozed his way through Vietnam in Texas and Alabama, this will no doubt seem like a wild, drunken fantasy.
    8. The Grapes of Wrath. President Christian Moral Values will demand more Bibles for those poor, suffering Okies.
    9. Dr. Strangelove... Commander in Chief Flight Suit will likely want to hire the furriner in the wheel chair: "He's got some damn good ideas!"
10. Eyes Wide Shut. The Unpresident will issue an Executive Order making this the new motto of the CIA.
-RSJ -
 
The Fifth Element, because Dick Cheney is Zorg, including his maniacal laugh and the fact that he is so married to oil that it oozes from his pores when he talks to Mr. Shadow.
- Jeff Crook -
 
The Ruling Class with Peter O'toole and Alistair Sim. Shows the utter inanity/insanity of the "leaders" of nations and the absurdity of religion.
- Paul -
 
I'm not sure what movie he should see but I know one I suspect he's been watching: Animal House. Specifically the scene when Dean Wermer says to Greg Marmalard "Get Niedermeier to do it. He's a sneaky little sh&t." You may insert whatever name you want in place of Niedermeier.
- Rita M. -
 
Little Big Man
- Palantir -
 
A movie Bush could watch while tripping is Malcolm X, directed by Spike Lee. He may come out of it thinking that Muslims are people too.
- Frank B. Michel -
 
Hows about forcing him and his daughters to listen to some of those torture interrogation tapes the CIA likes to borrow?
- Nick Kent -
 
He should be forced to watch The Nuremburg Trials.
- Meria Heller: THE MERIA HELLER SHOW - 5th yr On The Net- #1 on Net! -
 
Stupid Question of the Week
 
Mel Gibson left out the scene in The Passion where Mary wakes up to find the image of a grilled cheese sandwich on her face. What other scenes did he leave out?
 
 
Oops
 
Here's a picture of airline wreckage outside the Pentagon (from Snopes) that conspiracy theorists who think it was a missile need to explain.
 
Quiz of the Week
 
Go here and find the real penny.
 
Christmas Gift from Hell
More than a contradiction in terms, the black Republican
straddles the line not just between his conscience and
selling his soul, but between casual and formal wear.
This outfit says, I cannot justify what I do for a living,
but I look damn good in paisley.
 
Don't Take My Word For It
 
"[T]oday's new soldier averages five hours of sleep a night instead of seven. The day still begins at dawn and lasts past dinner, but core training pushes further into the night, eating into time once used for review and reinforcement of the day's lessons. Sundays, once set aside for worship, laundry and phone calls home, are no longer guaranteed 'light.'"
 
    "The 'rebels' or 'freedom fighters' are part of a nationwide 'resistance movement.' While many of them are local, even tribal, and fight simply because they are outraged by the occupation of their country, hundreds of others among the 'resistance fighters' young Arabs -- are arriving from as far away as 'Lebanon, Syria, Egypt and Jordan,' not to speak of Saudi Arabia and Algeria, to engage in jihad, ready as one of them puts it, to stay in the war 'until I am martyred.' Fighting for their 'Islamic ideals,' 'they are inspired by a sense of moral outrage and a religious devotion heightened by frequent accounts of divine miracles in the war.' They slip across the country's borders to fight the 'invader' and the 'puppet government' its officials have set up in the capital in their 'own image.' The invader's sway, however, 'extends little beyond the major cities, and even there the freedom fighters often hold sway by night and sometimes even by day.'"
    "On their part, the 'guerrillas,' armed largely with Russian and Chinese rifles and rocket propelled grenade launchers, have responded with the warfare of the weak. They have formed car-bombing squads and use a variety of cleverly constructed wheelbarrow, bicycle, suitcase, and roadside bombs as well as suicide operations performed by volunteers chosen from among the foreign jihadists. They engage in assassinations of, for example, university intellectuals and other sabotage activities in the capital and elsewhere aimed at killing the occupying troops and their sympathizers. They behead hostages to instill fear in the other side. Funding for the resistance comes, in part, from supporters in sympathetic Islamic countries, including Saudi Arabia. However, 'if the mujaheddin are ever to realize their goal of forcing [the occupiers] out, they will need more than better arms and training, more than their common faith. They will need to develop a genuinely unified resistance. Above all, the analysts say, they will need to make the war even costlier and more difficult for the [occupiers] than it is now.'"
- coverage of the Soviet occupation of Afghanistan in the 1980s during which we were on the side of the resistance, from Tom Engelhardt's Which War Is This Anyway? (mandatory reading) -
 
"The United Nations has for the last four years cited Norway as having the highest quality of life in the world. It is an egalitarian society sustained by high taxes and North Sea oil tracts. The literacy rate is 99%, and social and medical programs are all-encompassing."
 
    "When I served as Commander of the 42d Military Police Group in Germany from July '83 - July '85, I was responsible for executing the group's wartime mission, should the need arise, of collecting and controlling all enemy prisoners of war taken in theatre operations. Inherent in that responsibility was the absolute requirement that the Group, its leaders and its soldiers adhere strictly to the Geneva Convention in safeguarding the rights of American Forces' prisoners of war and in insuring that prisoners were treated humanely and appropriately in all instances.
    "Sadly, since September 11, 2001, those priorities have been overridden by some people in the administration who believe that in order to fight terrorism, we have to abandon our standards and honor. We have seen an administration work to abandon our international agreements. We have seen an administration twist legal logic in order to redefine torture and try to make it acceptable. And, sadly, we have seen the deaths in custody of prisoners held by U.S. forces.
    "One of the first responsibilities our forces bear under the Geneva Conventions is the protection of prisoners of war. These rules not only protect enemy prisoners of war, but protect our own troops when they are captured on the battlefield, and provide an international legal framework for punishing those who violate those rules."

"Straight male seeks Bush supporter for fair, physical fight - m4m. I would like to fight a Bush supporter to vent my anger. If you are one, have a fiery streak, please contact me so we can meet and physically fight. I would like to beat the shit out of you."

"This could open the door to the deregulation of alcohol. There is a potential for total alcohol anarchy."
- Viet Dinh: Georgetown University law professor, former assistant to John Ashcroft, and the chief author of the USA Patriot Act, on a current US Supreme Court Case involving the right of vineyards to sell their products directly to consumers -
 
"This case will decide whether consumers or a cartel of billion-dollar liquor distributors will determine what wine is available to consumers in New York or two dozen other states."
- Clint Bolick: the libertarian Institute for Justice -
 
    "In a case to be taken up this week, outgoing Atty. Gen. John Ashcroft is challenging the California law that permits seriously ill people to obtain marijuana to relieve their pain if they have the recommendation of a doctor.
    "Ashcroft argues for strong federal enforcement of drug laws. And he is joined by a group of drug warriors and half a dozen socially conservative Republicans in Congress who, in briefs to the court, argue for a zero-tolerance policy on marijuana."

"Let go of body and mind, until you reach a state of great rest, like letting go over a cliff ten miles high, being like open space. And don't produce representations of discriminations of random thoughts arising and passing away; the moment a view sticks in your mind, use the sword of wisdom to cut it right off, not letting it continue."
- Huai-t'ang -
 
"Words which come from the heart enter the heart."
- Ibn Ezra: Shirat Yisrael -
 
"With firm resolve, guard your own mind!"
- Buddha: Digha Nikaya, 16 -
 
"Too many people spend money they haven't earned to buy things they don't want to impress people they don't like."
- Will Rogers -

"The larger the mob, the harder the test. In small areas, before small electorates, a first-rate man occasionally fights his way through, carrying even the mob with him by force of his personality. But when the field is nationwide, and the fight must be waged chiefly at second and third hand, and the force of personality cannot so readily make itself felt, then all the odds are on the man who is, intrinsically, the most devious and mediocre, the man who can most easily and adeptly disperse the notion that his mind is a virtual vacuum."
 
"The principles of the religious fundamentalists are alien and primitive, better suited to being preached in a cathedral in Medieval Europe than in a church in modern America. Their corporate partners in rule are even more detestable. While they pay lip service to the wonders of the free market and its power to improve the lives of all Americans, they are actually bent on accumulation of wealth and power at the expense of everyone below them on the socioeconomic ladder. By means of tax cuts for the wealthy and government subordination to corporate interests, the wealth of America's population is steadily and rapidly being transferred into the pockets of a small class of greedy self-styled aristocrats."
 
"A blow job happened on Clinton's 'peace and prosperity' watch, and the media and the GOP spent over $100 million on a witch hunt inside his zipper to try to drive this 'bad president' from office. 9-11 and Iraq happened on Bush's 'war and death' watch, (over 4,000 dead) and not only did the media forgive him, they pushed for his re-election and they labeled him a 'good president.' Lesson learned: Having sex is worse than 4,000 people dying for no damn reason."
 
"In 2002, I was an on-air commentator at MSNBC, and also senior producer on The Donahue Show, the most-watched program on the channel. In the last months of the program, before it was terminated on the eve of the Iraq war, we were ordered by management that every time we booked an anti-war guest, we had to book 2 pro-war guests. If we booked two guests on the left, we had to book 3 on the right. At one meeting, a producer suggested booking Michael Moore and was told that she would need to book 3 right-wingers for balance. I considered suggesting Noam Chomsky as a guest, but our studio couldn't accommodate the 86 right-wingers we would have needed for balance."
 
    "I don't support the troops, and can't support the troops, because they're committing atrocities in Iraq that have caused the entire world to hate this nation, their behavior has shamed America, and put us all in danger. They have a duty to disobey illegal orders, and abide by the Geneva conventions, but instead they've committed about every imaginable war crime. They are the only ones with the ability to prevent these crimes, but instead they decided to participate in them.
    "One of the reasons they commit these crimes, and laugh about them, is because they can count on Americans to say 'we support the troops,' regardless of what they do over there. By 'supporting the troops,' you're helping to transform America into a nation of monsters the world hasn't seen since Nazi Germany, because you're allowing torture, murder, rape, and genocide to become accepted by the American public.
    "Maybe if we showed the outrage at their behavior that we should have shown 5 years ago, the troops wouldn't be so eager to comply with the madness of their leaders.
    "I think the troops, and their leaders should be held accountable for their actions, but apparently that concept is no longer acceptable by the American people.
    "Go ahead and put another stupid yellow ribbon decal on your car that says 'we support the troops.' I hope you're the next one to be tortured. Don't forget that their next mission might be enforcing martial law in this country.
    "I don't support the troops. They're behaving like monsters, and I hope they get killed over there, because I certainly don't want them coming back here."

    "First of all, I would like to apologize to the people of Iraq for the actions our government has taken in our name. Most of us do not support it. Most of those that do support it do so because they were lied to and made to feel afraid.
    "Americans are stupid, ignorant gullible people, and our government does its best to keep it that way. They keep us un-educated and ignorant and export what few jobs are left to countries over-seas, until the only jobs left are in the military.
    "I would like to propose a program to provide our troops (mostly poor kids from 'The Blue States' that only wanted a way to go to college) and to supply the Iraqi people with:
  1. Crest toothpaste
  2. Tide detergent
  3. Pampers diapers (Do they use disposable diapers in Iraq?)
  4. Puritan cooking oil
  5. Pure water filters (can you use their filters in Iraq?)
  6. Crest toothbrushes
    "These are all products from Proctor and Gamble, which the fundamentalist Christians are trying to boycott because P&G has taken a stand for human rights and equality. The fundamentalist Christians are concentrating their boycott on those first three items: Crest toothpaste, Tide detergent, and Pampers diapers. Most of those items should be of use to both the troops and the Iraqi people. Obviously, the troops can't use the diapers, but I am hoping Iraqi civilians can. The toothpaste, toothbrushes and detergent should be useful to everyone. And I think the cooking oil might be useful to the Iraqis for (of course) cooking. And since drinking water supplies are unreliable, I think the water filters may be useful, too.
    "I am hoping that if we can send these items to Iraq in mass quantities, it will:
  1. Help our troops
  2. Help the Iraqi people
  3. Help support Proctor & Gamble's humanitarian efforts
  4. Annoy the fundamentalist Christians
"I'm open to feedback."
- Ian Brumberger -
 
"I have a dream."
- Martin Luther King -
 
"I have a rifle."
- Malcolm X -
 
"I have a headache."
- Xarvon -
 
"Ann Coulter is actually a former drag queen from Key West named Pudenda Shenanigans. Ms. Shenanigans was famous for her renditions of Dude Looks Like a Lady, I will Survive, and You Shook Me All Night Long as well as an extensive Barbara Streisand repertoire. We who used to work with her are concerned for her as well as upset by the vile hatred she has spewed towards her former friends in the gay community. We feel that by bringing the truth to light perhaps Ann will come to grips with her past and change her wicked ways."
 
"It was the black man's vote that put the present administration in Washington, D.C. Your vote, your dumb vote, your ignorant vote, your wasted vote put in an administration in Washington, D.C., that has seen fit to pass every kind of legislation imaginable, saving you until last, then filibustering on top of that. And your and my leaders have the audacity to run around clapping their hands and talk about how much progress we're making. And what a good president we have. If he wasn't good in Texas, he sure can't be good in Washington, D.C. Because Texas is a lynch state. It is in the same breath as Mississippi, no different; only they lynch you in Texas with a Texas accent and lynch you in Mississippi with a Mississippi accent. And these Negro leaders have the audacity to go and have some coffee in the White House with a Texan, a Southern cracker - that's all he is - and then come out and tell you and me that he's going to be better for us because, since he's from the South, he knows how to deal with the Southerners. What kind of logic is that?"
- Malcolm X: The Ballot or the Bullet, April 3, 1964 (mandatory reading) -
 
"I just keep thinking if some of these big stars would just say something, like, 'How about I only get $24 million and you take the other $1 million and make sure the rest of the cast is getting their quotes.' Most people just aren't aware of the plight of the middle-class actor. As in any business, the fact that we tell ourselves we can't talk about money or how things are really going benefits no one but the heads of the studios and the stockholders. It sure doesn't benefit the actors."
 
"We have been following developments very closely and are deeply disturbed by the extensive and credible reports of fraud in the election. We call for a full review of the conduct of the election and the tallying of election results. We cannot accept this result as legitimate because it does not meet international standards and because there has not been an investigation of the numerous and credible reports of fraud and abuse."
- U.S. Secretary of State Colin Powell, 11/23/2004, concerning a foreign country -
 
"Excuse me?"
- US voters -
 
"The real problem for this nation is that the public, over the years, has come to trust the media, and has not yet realized that while a lot of the faces are the same, the purpose behind their broadcasts and their information is entirely different from any real coverage of real events. The media has become nothing more than the segmented cubicles of transnational corporations, that are beholden to no state, to no national flag, and to no political actions except those that profit their bottom line directly."
- Jim Kirwan: Who Can We Trust? -
 
"Strictly speaking, it probably is not necessary for the federal government to tax anyone directly; it could simply print the money it needs. However, that would be too bold a stroke, for it would then be obvious to all what kind of counterfeiting operation the government is running. The present system combining taxation and inflation is akin to watering the milk: too much water and the people catch on."
- Congressman Ron Paul [R-TX] -
 
    "A budget cut that hardly rated a debate before it was folded into the $388 billion appropriations bill last week will have a devastating effect on the notion of upward mobility in South Florida's working-class communities.
    "The $300 million cut in federal financial aid for students was achieved by tinkering with the eligibility formula for the $4,050 Pell Grants awarded on the basis of financial need. About 90,000 students will be cut off.
    "About a million others will find their grants reduced. Most of the students penalized by the new formula come from families with annual incomes in the $30,000 to $40,000 range."
- Fred Grimm: Congress again puts it to kids of working class -
 
"A submarine could take this place out."
- George W. Bush on the Clinton library -
 
    "Was the president warning of an al-Qaida submarine, sneaking undetected up the Mississippi, through the locks and dams of the Arkansas river, surfacing under the bridge to the 21st century to dispatch the Clinton library? Is that where Osama bin Laden is hiding? 
    "Or was this a wishful paranoid fantasy of ubiquitous terrorism destroying Clinton's legacy with one blow? Or a projection of menace and messianism, with only Bush grasping the true danger, standing between submerged threat and civilization? Perhaps it was simply his way of saying he wouldn't build his library near water."
- Sidney Blumenthal: One Gulp and Bush was Gone -
 
"People trying to be funny are never as funny as people trying to be serious and failing."
 
"A real friend never gets in your way - unless you happen to be on the way down."
- Dr. Wayne Dyer -
 
"This is Commander. Whoever dares to move in the area, even if it's a 3-year-old - you have to kill him. Over."
- An Israeli captain after emptying his machine gun into a 13-year-old girl -
 
"Why do you care, or care so much, whether the people running the government have good values? Wouldn't you prefer a bit of competence, if forced to choose? For example, suppose we had a government that was capable of ensuring enough flu vaccine to go around, like the governments of every other developed country in the world. Wouldn't that be nice? And if you could have that kind of government, would you really mind if a few more of its leaders secretly enjoyed Janet Jackson's half-time show at the Super Bowl?"
- Michael Kinsey: When Ideology is a Value -
 
    "A study conducted by the Fafo Institute for Applied Social Science, a Norwegian research group, found that acute malnutrition among Iraqi children between the ages of six months and five years has increased from 4 percent to 7.7 percent since the US-led invasion in March last year. 'It's in the level of some African countries,' Jon Pederson, the institute's deputy managing director, told Associated Press. 'Of course, no child should be malnourished, but when we're getting to levels of 7 to 8 percent, it's a clear sign of concern.'"
 
"The mission here is to capture or kill as many insurgents as possible and to keep pressure on them throughout the country. Therein lies the rub... when you run around a country that isn't yours and kill massive amounts of their citizens, how can you expect to keep a popular uprising down? I would like for just ONE example of limited warfare incursion where this model has succeeded."
- Patrick Collins: No Delusions -
 
    "According to informed sources in Washington and Houston, the Bush campaign spent some $29 million to pay polling place operatives around the country to rig the election for Bush. The operatives were posing as Homeland Security and FBI agents but were actually technicians familiar with Diebold, Sequoia, ES&S, Triad, Unilect, and Danaher Controls voting machines. These technicians reportedly hacked the systems to skew the results in favor of Bush.
    "The leak about the money and the rigged election apparently came from technicians who were promised to be paid a certain amount for their work but the Bush campaign interlocutors reneged and some of the technicians are revealing the nature of the vote rigging program...
    "The money to rig the election in favor of Bush reportedly came from an entity called Five Star Trust, largely based in Houston but a worldwide entity that is directly tied to the Saudi Royal Family. Five Star Trust was termed "a well-protected vehicle" that has been used to support both Bush and Osama bin Laden in the US and around the world."
 
    "In 1641, the Dutch governor of Manhattan offered the first scalp bounty; a common practice in many European countries. This was broadened by the Puritans to include a bounty for Natives fit to be sold for slavery. The Dutch and Puritans joined forces to exterminate all Natives from New England, and village after village fell. Following an especially successful raid against the Pequot in what is now Stanford, Connecticut, the churches of Manhattan announced a day of thanksgiving to celebrate victory over the savages. This was the 2nd Thanksgiving. During the feasting, the hacked off heads of Natives were kicked through the streets of Manhattan like soccer balls. 
    "The killing took on a frenzy, with days of thanksgiving being held after each successful massacre. Even the friendly Wampanoag did not escape. Their chief was beheaded, and his head placed on a pole in Plymouth, Massachusetts, where it remained for 24 years. Each town held thanksgiving days to celebrate their own victories over the Natives until it became clear that there needed to be an order to these special occasions. It was George Washington who finally brought a system and a schedule to thanksgiving when he declared one day to be celebrated across the nation as Thanksgiving Day."
 
"In 96 percent of House races and 91 percent of Senate races... the candidate who spent the most money won, according to a post-election analysis by the nonpartisan Center for Responsive Politics. The findings are based on figures reported Oct. 13 to the Federal Election Commission. The biggest spender was victorious in 413 of 432 decided House races and 31 of 34 decided Senate races."
 
"Radical change cannot and will not be negotiated by governments; it can only be enforced by..[a] public who can link hands across national borders."
- Arundhati Roy -
 
"At least the Ukrainians took to the streets in protest of their 'fixed' election. America falls silent; corporately owned media has not told them what to think or what to believe. Either uncaring, or bound and gagged by their own economic slavery, America has ignored her founding fathers warnings, deemed them obsolete and chosen the un-American precepts of those she once opposed. Americans have adopted the teachings of Hegel, Trotsky and Strauss and believed them as what is the right course of affairs and incorporated them into their educational system to raise up a generation of servants for the state and corporate interests."
- G. E. Malin: Lady Liberty Has Expired -
 
    "Republicans just repealed a bill requiring food to be labeled with the country of origin.
    "Farmers loved the idea of labeling because they believed that consumers want to know where their food comes from. Farm groups actively lobbied Congress to enact the bill, and they suggested a number of benefits to informing consumers of the origin of their food. First, farmers thought that many people believed that food from American farms is cleaner, safer, and possibly healthier, than food from foreign farms. Closely related is the concern in the world now about tainted food as a weapon of terrorism, and the hope that food from U.S. farms will be viewed as safe. Finally, U.S. farmers thought that many consumers would want to support American farmers out of a sense of loyalty, pride, and patriotism. Farmers thought it was a great idea, an idea that no one could possibly oppose.
    "But then some food processors and meat packers said that it would cost them money to add a couple of words to a food label. And food processors and meat packers are big campaign contributors, so they called their friends in Congress, and the bill was repealed."
- Michael Coblenz: Dancin' with the One Who Brung Ya -
 
"The incidence of the Mosque execution was deliberately aired so that it becomes a good diversion from the entire carnage and the victims, largely civilians, remain faceless and nameless. Whilst the technical breach of the soldier's action is discussed, the implicit idea implanted in the minds of the masses is: the rest of the soldiers are behaving in a manner that is acceptable."
- Yamin Zakaria: Hypocrisy is Democracy -
 
"In the end, we will remember not the words of our enemies, but the silence of our friends."
- Martin Luther King Jr. -
 
"To those of us on the inside of this issue, it seems inconceivable that our local newspapers would offer a front page story on election fraud in Ukraine while ignoring stories of the same right here at home in the United States. Every day, since November 2nd, 2004, stories have emerged detailing such things as malfunctioning voting machines, fraudulent election records in Volusia, Florida, inconsistent numbers of voter registrations vs. vote totals in Ohio, credible university studies showing serious statistical impossibilities in election results, and much more. Yet, these daily revelations have been almost completely ignored by our media. These reports are coming not from persons with tin foil hats as is often claimed, but from PhD level citizens, election officials, and voting rights activists."
- Kali Autumn Lynn: Media Blackout on Election Fraud -

"What did the Fascist regimes in Italy, Germany, and Spain have in common?  They consisted of a highly militarized state, backed by corporation and a wealthy elite, that rose to power through a false populism that exploited the public's fear of foreigners and moral degenerates. This precisely defines the formula that Karl Rove designed to consolidate the Bush administration's power in the recent election."
 
"The Bush/McDuck (tax) plan is a monument to untrammeled greed, a veritable swimming pool filled with bullion for trust-fund inheritors like Paris Hilton and the president himself to bask and wallow in. Without exception, each of the White Houses planned 'reforms' would have the effect of shifting the federal tax burden away from the rich and toward the salaried middle class. It favors wealth over work at every turn."
- Gene Lyons: Monument to greed -
 
"Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or genitals."
- Instruction label on a Swedish chain saw -
 
"So many Christians, so few lions."
- Gerald Rellick -
 
"Rural Oklahoma Voting machines know how to count backwards. That looks like what the secretly programmed machines did for Sen. Kerry in President Bush's easily won Presidential Election victory in Oklahoma. All 77 counties use the Optech Eagle voting machines and Tabulator's made by ES&S, Sen Hagel's republican company. The respectable, conservative Tulsa World newspaper reported Nov 3rd that Kerry was winning in 57 of the state's rural counties., with 70% of the vote counted. Turns out that the famous November 3rd report was probably not supposed to be printed. It represented the counting when the tabulating was about 70% 'complete,' as they used to say in the old Soviet Union. The 'official' State of Oklahoma Election Board vote totals released later show Kerry not winning; but, losing in all the state's 77 counties, including the 57 rural counties. Yea, somebody really messed up, big time, and published a partially completed and, I guess you would have to call it, 'fixed' vote."
 
    "The Iraqi War is serving as a great catharsis for multiple conservative frustrations: job loss, drugs, crime, homosexuals, pornography, female promiscuity, abortion, restrictions on prayer in public places, Darwinism, and attacks on religion. Liberals are the cause. Liberals are against America. Anyone against the war is against America and is a liberal. 'You are with us or against us.'
    "This is the mindset of delusion, and delusion permits of no facts or analysis. Blind emotion rules. Americans are right and everyone else is wrong. End of the debate."
- Paul Craig Roberts: What Became of Conservatives? -
 
"Such a one who can control his anger is like one who can masterfully steer a chariot pulled by 10,000 elephants."
- Buddha -
 
"They are the world's smallest wireless sensors. And at about the size of a wristwatch, the contain a battery powered microphone, an accelerometer, as well as temperature and humidity sensors, according to Sam Godwin, Vice President of Crossbow. Scatter them 250 feet apart and they will form their own wireless network similar to a spider's web. Smart Dust was first designed for the military, enabling troops to crop dust enemy lines with of millions of networked wireless sensors too small to see and too numerous to destroy."
 
"I see only one. Many men, One wilderness."
- Ashtavakra Gita 2:21 -
 
"If I can stop one heart from breaking, I shall not live in vain."
- Emily Dickinson -
 
"Surely a definition of PATHETIC has to be: Running to the end of
Disinfotainment Today to see if you made it into the quotable clips."
- Ben Baker -
 
Everything Else
 
Instant runoff voting (IRV) is a voting reform that asks the voter to rank the candidates in order of preference. It is simple, common-sense reform that will greatly improve our democratic process. IRV has many benefits including giving voters a wider range of choices, eliminating the spoiler factor with third-party candidates, saving taxpayer money, and decreasing negative campaigning. (Be sure to watch the flash presentation or the interactive Muppet election to see how it works.)
 
These photos were taken at Ground Zero on September 13, 2001. They were taken by someone named "Ed" who was allowed into the area by a member of the emergency response crew, at a time when all civilians - including most journalists - were forbidden to enter the area. As a result, these photos are just about the only close-ups ever taken of the World Trade Center site so soon after the 9/11 attacks. These photos are of Fallujah today.
 
Here's a damn good poster to print up and display concerning the election.
 
Got dough? Check out the top 10 green cars.
 
From the White House lawn on election day, the video of the week.
 
Witness is an organization devoted to using video and technology to fight for human rights.
 
 
Contact George W. Bush - president@whitehouse.gov
Contact the Freemasons - president@whitehouse.gov
Contact Skull and Bones - president@whitehouse.gov
Contact the Carlyle Group - president@whitehouse.gov
Contact the Illuminati - president@whitehouse.gov
Contact Satan - president@whitehouse.gov
Contact both houses of Congress - president@whitehouse.gov
Contact the Supreme Court - president@whitehouse.gov
Contact Dick Cheney - vice.president@whitehouse.gov
Contact Halliburton - vice.president@whitehouse.gov
Contact Saddam Hussein - vice.president@whitehouse.gov
Contact Osama bin Laden - thetwins@whitehouse.gov
Contact Jeb Bush - jeb.bush@myflorida.com
Contact Fidel Castro - jeb.bush@myflorida.com
Contact Kim Jong Il -
eng-info@kcna.co.jp
Contact Jacques Chirac - france-presse@un.int
Contact the Pope - accreditamenti@pressva.va
Contact God - president@whitehouse.gov
 
 
Don't let this happen to you
Subscribe to dIsInFoTaInMeNt ToDaY
 
Link to Disinfotainment Today with one of these tasteful banners.

dIsInFoTaInMeNt ToDaY archives are here.
Surely you've got something better to do than read Songs from Hell


Boo hoo
I have to use a lesser brand of caviar for my canapés.
Won't you please donate something to my Paypal account?
 


Acknowledgment

dIsInFoTaInMeNt ToDaY is free and may be reproduced in any form. It consists of information from dozens of sources, cut up, thrown in the air, and recycled randomly. It is sent all over the place, so I apologize if you're seeing the same thing twice. If you see a joke, graphic, or news item that came from or through you, thanks, send more, and please accept the fact that much of dIsInFoTaInMeNt ToDaY is unacknowledgeable, and if I sought permission from everyone whose bastardized material showed up here, I'd never get anything else done. Please note that I don't even put my own name on it. If you're still pissed off, hey, it's either satire or fair use.

Thanks,

Emilia Barfup
 
 
 
 
 

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'Best of TBH Politoons'

Click Here!



Thanks, again, Tim!

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Cory!! Strode On Graphic Novels

Fantagraphics

For all the talk we hear about people getting upset when their favorite comic strip is pulled from a newspaper, here in America, we have done an extremely poor job of archiving our comic strips. Until recently, there wasn't a single major publisher that was reprinting every strip, in chronological order, of any comic strips in newspapers.

The Garfield books were the last mass market books to do so, but they stopped in the mid 90's. If you wanted complete chronological reprinting, you had to go to comic book shops, and then, the number of strips being reprinted was amazingly small.

Now, you would think that with all of the attention the Peanuts has gotten over the decades, it would have had a complete reprinting before now. It hasn't. The paperbacks that were huge bestsellers in the 60's and 70's were selected strips, usually out of order, and woefully incomplete.

Thankfully, a comic book publisher has secured the rights to do a complete reprinting, and the first two volumes are available, reprinting the first four years of the strip. Some of the strips have never been reprinted, and with a few from 1954, the copies were incomplete, and had to be "recreated" by Seth, the artist who is designing the books.

The Complete Peanuts Volume One: 1950-1952 covers the earliest years of Peanuts, and the fact that it is just as funny now as it was then shows Schultz's strength as an observer of children's behavior. Most people have heard comic artist talk about Schultz as an innovator, but looking at these strips, it's hard to see it, since most comic strips now use his clean line art, and how he builds through the strip for a single joke. However, at the time, there were very few humor strips, and most of them were in the style of L'il Abner or Pogo, crammed with text, and jokes in every panel, from character names, to background gags. Schultz drew his strip as if it were an extended magazine joke comic, bringing the style of The Saturday Evening Post and The New Yorker to the daily comic strip.

Even without that, it is still a joy to read. Charlie Brown started as more of a mischievous character, and many of the supporting characters faded away as later additions like Lucy, Linus and Peppermint Patty slowly took over the strip. The jokes work, even if there are a few elements tied to the early days of television that seem a bit dated.

Volume Two: 1952 - 1954 shows Schultz introducing more of the elements into the strip that people would recognize now. His designs for the character subtly changed to the designs that solidified in the 60's, Charlie Brown become more the "Everyman loser" that people know now. If anything, the strips in this volume are more polished, and most of them have never been reprinted.

Fantagraphics is planning on printing a new volume ever four months until the entire run has been reprinted, and estimates it will take 17 years to do so. Peanuts is one of the few comic strips that works on two levels, one for children, and one for adults, and is a welcome addition to any library.

Now, if we could just get some company to pick up the L'il Abner, Pogo and Barnaby strips and give them the same treatment.


Cory!! Strode (The Best Dressed Man In Comics) has written comic books, novels, jokes for comedians, Op Ed columns, the on-line comic strip www.Asylumon5thstreet.com and has all kinds of things on his website www.solitairerose.com

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Weekly Link

Sick Of This Crap!

Man, oh man, is my tummy a bulging with holiday excess! It's nice to know one part of the world is fat and complacent, eh?

This week's issue includes:
   * From Social Security to Fiscal Insecurity
   * Soldiers in Iraq - Where's President Turkey?
   * NRA misses a top story

Join us won't you join us? We're just a click away....

Sick Of This Crap!


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Reader Recommendation

Iraqi Lullaby video

Iraqi Lullaby video - Quicktime

Iraqi Lullaby video - Real Media



Thanks, Bruce!

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David Bruce Writes About Husbands and Wives

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Recommended Reading

Connie Rice

Connie Rice: Top 10 Election Myths to Get Rid Of



Thanks, Bruce!

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Reader Suggestion

a website

It just has links to other stuff except for "WHAT PEOPLE ARE SAYING".

Click on that, and you'll get a chuckle.

Sharon

Look for "WHAT PEOPLE ARE SAYING"



Thanks, Sharon!

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Reader Suggestions

Fun Sites

The Daily Bikini

The Fart Farm



Thanks, Bruce!

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Purple Gene Reviews

Bill Miller

Purple Genes' Mini-Review of Bill Miller - Native American Singer-Songwriter and Painter:

I haven't seen a guitar played pound on a Martin Dreadnought D16 like that since I saw Ritchie Havens hammering out "Eleanor Rigby" at the Fillmore back in 1967. Well I'm talking about Bill Miller (Fush-ya Heay Ka or "Bird Song") who is a half German - half Mohican country folk blues native american singer. This was another night to remember at the Blue Bird in Nashville Tennessee. Bill was sharing the close knit "In the Round" style acoustic concert with songwriters Tony Arata, Michael Johnson and Danny Flowers.........in the center of 50 faithful, focused and fortunate fans........

Bill told a story about being raised on the Reservation in Wisconsin...it was the early sixties and Bill remembers hearing a Bob Dylan song on his little radio...."The Times they are a Changin'".....he brought the words into his school teacher and this touched off his song writing career........Well Bill played that song with an intensity and a tenor voice that was earth shaking.....his chiseled face and long black hair constantly moving and emoting dramatically.....He traded off with the other artists ...but whenever it came his turn to sing - the audience braced themselves for another vocal voyage.....inspiring....he talked about his struggles with racism and alcohol and said "After years of living against the grain, I see things as rivers and creeks and rainstorms, as the liquid layers of my life"!.....he ended his set with a new song from his album "Spirit Rain" called "Rain Down your Love"....full of beautiful water images...he was wonderful........

He's playing Wednesday night (Dec 1st) at the Freight and Salvage in Berkeley, California!

Purple Gene gives Bill Miller 10 curtain calls out of 10 for his great music!

Purple Gene

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Selected Readings

from that Mad Cat, JD

WHO OWNS AMERIKA?

SHOW TIME!

THE CHICKENSHIT GOES TO HALIFAX

LET GET REALLY FUCKING STUPID

JESUS IS COMING! JESUS IS COMING!

ONE MORE BUSH LIE EXPOSED

THE EYES OF SATAN ARE UPON YOU

FREEDOM IS ON THE MARCH. GROOVY

THE MIRACLE OF THE CHIMP

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In The Chaos Household

Last Night

Sunny, clear and cold - well, cold for here.

Did you see the made-over Michael Moore on Leno? Clean shaven & in a suit!

Having plumbing problems. Ack.



Tonight, Tuesday:

CBS begins the night with a FRESH 'NCIS', followed by a FRESH 'Amazing Race 6', then a FRESH 'Judging Amy'.
Scheduled on a FRESH Dave is Ken Jennings.
Scheduled on a FRESH 'Craiggers' with guest host Michael Ian Black are William Shatner, Penn & Teller, and Peter Cincotti.

NBC starts the night with a FRESH 'special' - 'Christmas In Rockefeller Center', followed by a FRESH 'The Biggest Loser', then a FRESH 'Law & Order: Special Victims Unit'.
Scheduled on a FRESH Leno are Tina Fey, Amy Poehler, and Kelly Clarkson.
Scheduled on a FRESH Conan are Peter Gallagher and the Killers.
Scheduled on a FRESH Carson Daly are Eddie Izzard, Susan Miller, and Seace Divine.

ABC opens the night with a FRESH 'My Wife & Kids', followed by a FRESH 'George Lopez', then a FRESH 'Jim', followed by a FRESH 'Rodney', then a FRESH 'NYPD Blue'.
Scheduled on a FRESH Jimmy Kimmel are Robin Williams and Guerilla Black.

The WB offers a FRESH 'Gilmore Girls', followed by a FRESH 'One Tree Hill'.

Faux has a FRESH 'The Rebel Billionaire: Branson's Quest For The Best', followed by a FRESH 'House'.

UPN has a FRESH 'All Of Us', followed by a FRESH 'Eve', then a FRESH 'Veronica Mars'.

A&E has 'American Justice', 'Biography' (Joel Rifkin), 'Cold Case Files', 'Dog The Bounty Hunter', and another 'Dog The Bounty Hunter'.

AMC offers the movie 'The Ghosts Of Mississippi', followed by the movie 'A Civil Action', then the movie 'City Hall'.

BBC  -   
 [2pm]    'As Time Goes By' - Episode 7;
 [2:40pm]    'Are You Being Served?' - A Change Is As Good As A Rest;
 [3:20pm]    'Keeping Up Appearances' - Episode 1;
 [4pm]    'The Saint' - The Gadic Collection;
 [5pm]    'The Weakest Link' - Episode 50;
 [6pm]    'BBC World News';
 [6:30pm]    'Cash in the Attic' - Page;
 [7pm]    'Bargain Hunt' - France 13;
 [7:30pm]    'What Not to Wear' - Sandie;
 [8pm]    'Cash in the Attic' - Episode 4;
 [9pm]    'Changing Rooms' - Hither Green;
 [9:30pm]    'Changing Rooms' - Plymouth;
 [10pm]    'Faking It' - Choir Girl to Rock Chick;
 [11pm]    'Cash in the Attic' - Episode 4;
 [12am]    'Changing Rooms' - Hither Green;
 [12:30am]    'Changing Rooms' - Plymouth;
 [1am]    'Faking It' - Choir Girl to Rock Chick;
 [2am]    'Bargain Hunt' - France 13;
 [2:30am]    'What Not to Wear' - Sandie;
 [3am]    'Cash in the Attic' - Episode 4;
 [4am]    'Changing Rooms' - Hither Green;
 [4:30am]    'Changing Rooms' - Plymouth;
 [5am]    'Faking It' - Choir Girl to Rock Chick;
 [6am]    'BBC World News'    (ALL TIMES EST)

Bravo has 'West Wing', followed by a FRESH 'Manhunt...', 'Queer Eye', and another 'Queer Eye'.

Comedy Central has 'MAD TV', 'Crank Yankers', 'Reno 911!', 'South Park', 'Chappelle's Show', and 'Wanda Does It'.
Scheduled on a FRESH Jon Stewart is TBA.

History has 'Tactical To Practical', followed by a FRESH 'Wild West Tech', 'Secret Allied Aircraft Of WWII', and 'Band Of Brothers'.

IFC  -   
 [6AM]    'Telling Lies In America' (1997);
 [7:45AM]    'IFC In Theaters' (2004);
 [8AM]    'The Gods Must Be Crazy' (1980);
 [10AM]    'IFC Short Film Collection II' (2004);
 [12PM]    'Telling Lies In America' (1997);
 [1:45PM]    'The Gods Must Be Crazy' (1980);
 [3:45PM]    'Beijing Bicycle' (2001);
 [5:45PM]    'At the Angelika #90' (2004);
 [6:15PM]    'IFC Short Film Showcase';
 [7:15PM]    'Telling Lies In America' (1997);
 [9PM]    'Dinner For Five #35' (2004);
 [9:30PM]    'Ultimate Film Fanatic #6' (Southwest Region) (2004);
 [10PM]    'Ready To Wear' (1994);
 [12:15AM]    'Requiem For A Dream' (2000);
 [2AM]    'Fear of a Black Hat' (1994);
 [3:30AM]    'Ready To Wear' (1994);
 [5:45AM]    Short: 'Lick The Star' (1998)    (ALL TIMES EST)

SciFi has the movie 'Wing Commander', followed by the movie 'Stargate'.

Sundance  -   
 [7AM]    'A Perfect Candidate' (Documentary);
 [8:45AM]    'Tulip' (Short);
 [9AM]    'Big Eden' (Feature);
 [11AM]    'Yves Saint Laurent: His Life and Times' (Documentary);
 [12:30PM]    'Purity' (Feature);
 [1:35PM]    'Sunday, Bloody Sunday' (Feature);
 [3:30PM]    'Wings Of Desire' (Feature);
 [5:40PM]    'Coffee With Pina' (Short);
 [6PM]    'Big Eden' (Feature);
 [8PM]    'Standing in the Shadows of Motown' (Documentary);
 [10PM]    'Keepintime: A Live Recording' (Documentary);
 [11PM]    'MacArthur Park' (Feature);
 [12:30AM]    'Dead or Alive: Final' (Feature);
 [2AM]    'The Crossing Guard' (Feature);
 [4AM]    'Muti Murders - The Dark Side of Occult Belief Systems in Africa' (Documentary);
 [5AM]    'Yves Saint Laurent: His Life and Times (Documentary)    (ALL TIMES EST)

TCM celebrates the ever-fabulous Virginia Mayo's 84th birthday all morning and afternoon, and fills the night with family fare (kleenex alert).
 [6am]    'The Best Years Of Our Lives' (1946);
 [9am]    'The Secret Life Of Walter Mitty' (1947);
 [11am]    'Smart Girls Don't Talk' (1948);
 [12:30pm]    'Always Leave Them Laughing' (1949);
 [2:30pm]    'Flaxy Martin' (1949);
 [4pm]    'The Girl From Jones Beach' (1949);
 [5:30pm]    'Great Day In The Morning' (1956);

 [7:30pm]    'Festival of Shorts #36' (2001);
 [8pm]    'The Yearling' (1946);
 [10:15pm]    'Sounder' (1972);
 [12:15am]    'The Champ' (1931);
 [1:45am]    'Goodbye Mr. Chips' (1939);
 [3:45am]    'Boys' Town' (1938);
 [5:30am]    'Festival of Shorts #36' (2001)    (ALL TIMES EST)


Wednesday  -  12/01

TCM:
 [6am]    'Nosferatu' (1922)  [AKA:  'Nosferatu, eine Symphonie des Grauens'] SILENT ;
 [7:30am]    'Metropolis' (1927) SILENT ;
 [9:45am]    'The Birds' (1963);
 [12pm]    'Creature from the Black Lagoon' (1954);
 [1:30pm]    'Soylent Green' (1973);
 [3:15pm]    'King Kong' (1933);
 [5pm]    'The Thing From Another World' (1951);
 [6:30pm]    'The Blob' (1958);
 [8pm]    'Moonstruck' (1987);
 [10pm]    'Arsenic And Old Lace' (1944);
 [12:15am]    'Psycho' (1960);
 [2:15am]    'You Can't Take It With You' (1938);
 [4:30am]    'A Thousand Clowns' (1965)    (ALL TIMES EST)


TBS has the SERIES PREMIERE of 'The Real Gilligan's Island'.



RERUN
FRESH

Any opinions?

Or reviews?



(See below for addresses)

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Actors Jeremy Irons, left, and Al Pacino wait to meet the Prince of Wales, during the British premiere of their film 'The Merchant of Venice' in Leicester Square, London, Monday Nov. 29, 2004.
Photo by Matthew Fearn
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Click Here!

Moose & Squirrel - The Blog

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Sidelined by Ruptured Disk

George Clooney

George Clooney is suffering from a ruptured disk that kept him promoting his new film, "Ocean's Twelve," this week.

Clooney had been scheduled to travel to New York Sunday for appearances on shows including "Good Morning America," "The Daily Show" and "Charlie Rose," his spokesman, Stan Rosenfield, said Monday.

But Clooney told Rosenfield on Saturday that his condition had worsened and he would be unable to travel. Rosenfield said he didn't have information on how or when the injury occurred.

George Clooney

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Stressed

Shirley Manson

Garbage frontwoman Shirley Manson is so stressed over the band's forthcoming fourth album she's been diagnosed with a "horrifying" skin condition.

"I went to the dermatologist and was diagnosed with pereira dermatitis," Manson said. "They have no idea what causes it but the doctor asked me if I was under stress."

"I've now got to take a course of antibiotics to rid myself of it because if I only stick to the topical cream it will take me six months to get over it."

"I've completely stopped looking at myself in the mirror because what stares back at me is utterly horrifying. It's better to just live in blissful ignorance."

Shirley Manson

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Film character 'Godzilla', center, poses with, from left, Los Angeles councilmember Tom LaBonge, Japanese film producer Shogo Tomiyama, honorary Mayor of Hollywood Johnny Grant, actor Masahiro Matsuoka, director Ryuhei Kitamura, actress Rei Kiku Kawa and special effects director Eiichi Asada after receiving a star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame, Monday, Nov. 29, 2004, in Los Angeles. Godzilla celebrates its 50th anniversary with the premiere of the new film 'Godzilla Final Wars.
Photo by Damian Dovarganes
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US Abandoned Landmine Treaty

Danny Glover

Danny Glover blasted his country for failing to sign a pact to eliminate landmines after he visited child victims of landmines in Ethiopia, the latest nation to ratify the 1997 Ottawa Convention.

At the same time Glover, a vocal activist on child issues and a newly appointed Goodwill Ambassador for the United Nations Children's Fund (UNICEF), pledged to do everything in his power to help children affected by war.

"After talking to children I feel a sense of embarrassment and anger that my own country has not signed the landmine treaty," said Glover, who is probably best known for his role as Sergeant Roger Murtaugh in the "Lethal Weapon" series.

"I think the US abandonment of the Ottawa Convention sends a bad message to the rest of the world," he told a reporters in Geneva, where the 57-year-old is spending the night en route back to the United States after his Ethiopia trip.

Danny Glover

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Leaving NPR After 3 Years

Tavis Smiley

Talk-show host Tavis Smiley said Monday he will be leaving National Public Radio, which he said has tried hard but fallen short of reaching "a broad spectrum of Americans who would benefit from public radio."

Smiley, 40, said Monday that Dec. 16 will be his last day as host of "The Tavis Smiley Show."

Smiley did not disclose his future plans.

Tavis Smiley

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Released in Britain

Band Aid Single

A new, star-studded recording of the 1984 charity single "Do They Know It's Christmas?" hit British record stores Monday, many of which opened early in anticipation of large crowds.

The single features artists including Coldplay's Chris Martin, former Beatle Paul McCartney, U2's Bono, and Dido, and will raise money for victims of the ongoing strife in the Sudan, where fighting has killed thousands of people and created 1.8 million refugees.

The original single was released 20 years ago and was a smash success, raising millions of dollars for victims of starvation in Ethiopia. It featured artists including Boy George, Duran Duran, and Phil Collins. Bono is the only artist to appear on both versions of the song.

Band Aid Single

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bartcook

In The Kitchen With BartCop & Friends

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Opens Competition to Foreign Films

Sundance

The Sundance Film Festival, the premier U.S. showcase for independent cinema, named the films on Monday that will compete at its 2005 festival in January, including documentaries about energy company Enron and Peru's fugitive president, Alberto Fujimori.

Festival director Geoffrey Gilmore said the program contained some of the best films Sundance had ever shown and added that for the first time the festival would feature contests for best foreign dramas and documentaries.

Since its beginning, Sundance has championed documentaries, despite the fact few of the films succeed at box offices. That has changed in recent years, with Michael Moore's "Fahrenheit 9/11" raking in more than $100 million in ticket sales.

Sundance now aims to bring similar sparks of recognition to foreign films, too, with their new competitions.

Sundance

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Demonstrators protest the upcoming two-day official visit by U.S. resident George W. Bush in Ottawa, November 29, 2004. United States resident George W. Bush will come to Ottawa on November 30 for a two-day official visit.
Photo by Mike Cassese
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To Perform Jazz Narrative

Wynton Marsalis

Trumpeter Wynton Marsalis will star in the premiere of a 90-minute jazz concert narrative he composed - "Suite for Human Nature" - at Washington's Lincoln Theatre on Dec. 10.

Marsalis, 43, will play with New York's Lincoln Center Jazz Orchestra, 30 voices from the Boys Choir of Harlem, solo singers Milt Grayson, Allan Harris and Jennifer Sanon, and a narrator, Nancy Giles.

The libretto by Diane Charlotte Lampert deals with Mother Nature, Father Time and their children. It tells of the Four Winds coming to the rescue when troubles of the world created by Nature and Time become "almost too much to bear," according to the announcement by the Washington Performing Arts Society, which commissioned the work.

Wynton Marsalis

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Popular in Britain

'Gone With the Wind'

"Gone With the Wind," the American Civil War saga starring Clark Gable and Vivien Leigh, is the most-watched movie in British history, according to the British Film Institute.

"The Sound of Music" is in the No. 2 spot with an estimated 30 million tickets sold since its release in 1965, followed by "Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs," released in 1938 and seen by 28 million people, and George Lucas' "Star Wars," released in Britain in 1978, with 20.7 million tickets sold.

Rounding out the top 10 films: "The Best Years of Our Lives," released in 1947, 20.4 million; "The Jungle Book," 1968, 19.8 million; "Titanic," 1998, 18.9 million; "The Wicked Lady," 1946, 18.4 million; and "The Seventh Veil," 1945, 17.9 million.

'Gone With the Wind'

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pissed
(formerly 'The Vidiot')

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Subscriber Renewals Higher

Martha Stewart

In a sign that many consumers aren't concerned by Martha Stewart's personal legal travails, readers of her flagship magazine are renewing their subscriptions at a pace well ahead of industry norms.

Nearly 70 percent of Martha Stewart Living subscribers said they planned to renew their subscriptions, according to a September survey conducted for WPP Group PLC's Mediaedge:cia.

The renewal rate is 19 percent better than the magazine industry average, an analysis by circulation consultancy Capell & Associates found.

Martha Stewart

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Yang Soon-in, right, daughter of a South Korean soldier who was forced to work for the Japanese wartime military, is outraged and cries in front of the Supreme Court in Tokyo Monday, Nov. 29, 2004. Japan's top court rejected compensation demands by former South Korean sex slaves and soldiers. The Japanese government has acknowledged that its wartime army established brothels and forced thousands of Koreans into military service, but it has refused to pay direct or official compensation to individuals. At left is another family member of former soldier Kim Jung-im.
Photo by Katsumi Kasahara
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Netflix to Send DVDs

Independent Film Award Voters

In a move to raise its profile as a purveyor of art films, online DVD rental outfit Netflix Inc. has agreed to provide free copies of films to 9,000 voters who will choose the winners of the Independent Spirit Awards next year, a Netflix spokesman said on Monday.

The "screeners" initially will be available only to members of the Independent Feature Project/Los Angeles, which chooses the winners of the top honors for independent films, but Netflix will eventually offer subscribers DVDs of movies that do not land distribution deals, Netflix content chief Ted Sarandos said.

The move comes as Netflix faces increasing pressure to distinguish itself from bigger rivals copying its model of sending rental DVDs through the mail.

Independent Film Award Voters

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Detention Extended by a Year

Aung San Suu Kyi

Detained pro-democracy leader Aung San Suu Kyi has been told she will be held under house arrest for another year, a spokesman for her National League for Democracy party said Monday.

NLD spokesman U Lwin said the party confirmed over the weekend that Suu Kyi had been told her detention would be extended.

Suu Kyi has been detained several times. Her longest period of house arrest was from 1989-1995.

Aung San Suu Kyi

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A handout image released on November 29, 2004 shows a painting entitled 'St Isaac's on a frosty day,' by the late Russian artist Ivan Konstantinovich Aivazovskii, which is estimated to fetch 1,000,000 - 1,500,000 pounds sterling ($1,893,204 - $2,839,807) in a forthcoming sale at Christie's. Flush with cash and culturally conscious, Moscow's millionaires are descending on London to snap up national treasures in what is being billed as the biggest offering of Russian paintings ever. In a bid to tap one of the art world's hottest sectors, auction houses Christie's and Sotherby's go head-to-head with sales on Tuesday and Wednesday respectively.
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Men's NCCA Tournament

Sirius

Sirius Satellite Radio signed a deal to air the men's NCAA basketball tournament through 2007, the latest move made in an attempt to draw customers through sports programming.

Sirius will broadcast every game of the tournament for the next three years, the network said Monday. Financial terms were not disclosed.

Westwood One currently holds the national commercial radio rights to the NCAA tournament.

Sirius

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Sotheby's to Auction Lost Novel

Truman Capote

A manuscript of Truman Capote's unpublished first novel, which the author abandoned and claimed to have destroyed, has been found in a box of papers and will be auctioned this week at Sotheby's.

The first draft of "Summer Crossing" - the story of a 17-year-old girl who has been left in New York while her parents spend the summer in Europe - was at the bottom of a box of Capote manuscripts and photos that was consigned by a relative of Capote's former house sitter.

Capote, who died in 1984, had hired the house sitter to look after his Brooklyn apartment while he was in Switzerland writing his nonfiction novel, "In Cold Blood," Sotheby's told The Associated Press Monday.

After the 1966 publication of "In Cold Blood" made him rich, Capote closed the Brooklyn apartment and told the landlord that he was abandoning any possessions there. The house sitter retrieved the box of manuscripts from the sidewalk.

Truman Capote

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In Memory

John D. Barrymore

Actor John D. Barrymore, the father of Drew Barrymore, died Monday, the actress said. He was 72.

"He was a cool cat. Please smile when you think of him," Drew Barrymore said in a statement issued by her publicist.

No information was released about the cause of death or where in Los Angeles he died.

John D. Barrymore was part of an acting dynasty that included his father, John Barrymore, and his father's siblings, Lionel Barrymore and Ethel Barrymore.

John D. Barrymore was born in Beverly Hills on June 4, 1932. His mother was actress Dolores Costello.

John D. Barrymore

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Clione or 'sea angels' swim in a Tokyo aquarium November 29, 2004. The Clione, which lives mostly in temperate waters, can be found in the Okhotsk Sea, off the northeastern part of Hokkaido in Japan.
Photo by Kimimasa Mayama
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