'Best of TBH Politoons'
Thanks, again, Tim!
Jazz From Hills
Trimmed Bush and Hedges
Reader Comment
Re: Rodney Dangerfield
As soon as I got the sad news, I pictured Rodney at the Pearly Gates.
The second that Saint Peter lets him in, he yells to everyone present that great line from "Caddyshack":
"Hey, everybody - we're all gonna get laid!"
Terry C
NJ
Thanks, Terry!
Weekly Link
Humor Gazette
Vice President Dick Cheney scored a decisive blow in his debate with Sen. John
Edwards on Tuesday by citing a link between Al Qaeda and U.S. trial lawyers.
Cheney also claimed that, if elected, John Kerry would appoint Germans and
Frenchmen to his Cabinet.
Just a little post-debate satire from the Humor Gazette
from Mark
Another Bumpersticker
Reader Suggestions
More Bumper Stickers
Annoy Ralph Nader: Vote for John Kerry
Are You Better Off Than You Were Four Years Ago?
Will You Be Better Off If Bush Gets Four More
Years?
Do You Feel Safer Than You Did Four Years Ago?
Will You Feel Safer If Bush Gets Four More Years?
Bush/Cheney: Nothing Accomplished
I'm Not A Democrat. I Just Hate Bush.
2004: Vote With A Vengeance
Thanks, Bruce!
Reader Contribution
Urban Legend?
Heather sent in this:
Selected Readings
from that Mad Cat, JD
In The Chaos Household
Last Night
Fog didn't burn off til nearly noon - nice, sunny, mild afternoon.
Watching baseball tonight and was taken by how many players are now chewing tobacco.
Dipping was very common back where I grew up - my high school put planters with fake trees in the hallways so there'd be somewhere to spit - they might not admit that's why, but they served a purpose and everybody knew.
Local folklore even prescribed using chewing tobacco for a toothache - Mail Pouch was preferred, but Skoal would do in a pinch.
We've come a long way, baby.
Singer Alicia Keys models a 'Vote or Die!' t-shirt photographed by Mark Seliger for the group 'Citizen Change' which will be used in a massive get out the vote campaign aimed at young people in the United States, in this undated publicity photograph. Seliger photographed numerous celebrities for the campaign including Leonardo DeCaprio, Paris Hilton and Sean 'P. Diddy' Combs.
Photo by Mark Seliger
Joining Sirius Satellite Radio
Howard Stern
Howard Stern has long had two words for the Federal Communications Commission - and in 15 months, he can finally utter them on the air.
The self-proclaimed "King of All Media," perhaps the most influential radio voice of the last 20 years, is shifting his salacious act to satellite radio and freeing himself from the increasingly harsh glare of federal regulators. His new employer, Sirius Satellite Radio, is gambling its new star can rescue a company that's lost $1 billion over the last five years.
In an announcement Wednesday ripping the FCC and media conglomerate Clear Channel Communications Inc., Stern told his loyal audience of 12 million that he was abandoning traditional broadcasting. His debut on Sirius will come in January 2006, after Stern finishes the rest of his current deal with Infinity Broadcasting Corp., the radio subsidiary of MTV owner Viacom Inc.
Federal Communications Commission Chairman Michael Powell (R-Nepotism) responded to Stern's move Wednesday by saying that "it is not surprising that notable performers and journalists are turning to a medium that allows them to paint with a broader palette."
Stern's show will air as part of Sirius' basic package, rather than as a premium channel. Sirius offers 120 channels of commercial-free music, sports, news, talk, entertainment and traffic for a monthly fee of $12.95. Customers do not need a dish to receive the radio signal; it's picked up by a receiver about the size of a car radio. There's a one-time fee of $15 to start the service, and the equipment can cost up to $150.
Howard Stern
2 Million Sold On Day 1
'Fahrenheit 9/11'
Michael Moore's politically charged documentary "Fahrenheit 9/11" sold about 2 million combined DVD and VHS units Tuesday (Oct. 5), its first day in release, according to industry sources.
That Day 1 sales figure and projected Week 1 sales of 3 million combined units set the benchmark as the most successful documentary ever released on home video.
While initial home video sales figures for "Fahrenheit" were expected to break records -- considering its $119 million domestic boxoffice take -- industry observers are watching closely to see how the title will sell and rent over time.
'Fahrenheit 9/11'
Hip-Hop Acts Lead Voter-Awareness 'Race'
'Race to the Polls'
Ludacris, Public Enemy and Mase are among the acts that will perform at Race to the Polls, an Oct. 14 voter awareness concert at New York's Hammerstein Ballroom.
Staged by the Hip-Hop Summit Action Network and Sony's PlayStation 2, the event also will feature a celebrity video gaming tournament.
Funkmaster Flex and Doug E. Fresh will host the event, with help from DJs Biz Markie and Green Lantern.
Race to the Polls tickets are priced at $20.04 and $15 and are available via the Web sites of the Hip-Hop Summit Action Network and New York radio station WQHT, as well as Ticketmaster.
'Race to the Polls'
Rep. Dennis Kucinich, D-Ohio, left, speaks as country music legend Willie Nelson, right, looks on during a news conference about the importance of revitalizing family farming on Capitol Hill Wednesday, Oct. 6, 2004 in Washington. They said that the government must commit all necessary resources to encourage growth in family farming and protect farmers so that they can continue to be economically viable.
Photo by Charles Dharapak
Judging MTV Contest
The Osbournes
Ozzy and Sharon Osbourne are launching a new MTV reality series/contest in which a band will win a slot on the Ozzfest 2005 tour.
"Battle for Ozzfest," which premieres Oct. 25 at 10:30 p.m. ET/PT, will feature eight bands competing for the Ozzfest prize in addition to touring money, equipment and a possible record deal.
The Osbournes will serve as judges and decide which bands are eliminated from the competition.
The Osbournes
Responds to GOP Charges
Michael Moore
Michael Moore shot back at Republicans on Wednesday after they requested that the filmmaker be prosecuted for offering underwear and food to college students in exchange for their promise to vote.
"It's ironic that Republicans have no problem with allowing assault weapons out on our streets, yet they don't want to put clean underwear in the hands of our slacker youth," Moore said. "The Republicans seem more interested in locking me up for trying to encourage people to participate in our democracy than locking up bin Laden for his attacks on our democracy."
Moore is touring the country and imploring "slackers" who usually don't vote to head to the polls this year, saying they could make the difference in the presidential race.
During each program, habitual nonvoters are invited on stage to pledge to vote. First-time student voters are offered gag prizes such as clean underwear.
Michael Moore
Puts Anti-Bush Tattoo On Skull
Kerra Fowler
Kerra Fowler is a mother of four who decided to wear her opposition to President George W. Bush on the back of her head. She offered up on eBay her shaved skull for an anti-Bush message and received a tattoo of a large W, complete with a cowboy hat, with a red slash across it after a sympathetic buyer bid $103.50.
Fowler, 29, said she placed her eBay advertisement with an opening bid of one penny after seeing two others offering to sell space on their heads for tattoos backing Democratic candidate John Kerry.
"One wanted 10 grand and the other, $30,000," she told The Herald-Times of Bloomington for a story Tuesday. "So I thought, that isn't right, to say you believe in something and then charge $30,000. I thought that was audacious."
Fowler said the winning eBay bidder asked her not to get the tattoo. But she went through with it after she and her husband, Jeremy, came up with the design with a tattoo artist in Bedford, some 20 miles south of Bloomington.
Kerra Fowler
Library Wades Through Memorabilia
Katharine Hepburn
The stuff of one remarkable life was spread out on 10 large library tables. There were letters, telegrams, scrapbooks, movie scripts, scores of photographs and other memorabilia - all meticulously collected by Katharine Hepburn during her classic 65-year career.
Truckloads of the material had been arriving in recent days at the Margaret Herrick Library of the Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences - a gift from the estate of the four-time Oscar-winner, who died last year at age 96. And more mementos were on the way from Hepburn's New York and Connecticut homes.
In the months to come, curators will painstakingly review and catalogue the papers before making them available to qualified researchers next year.
For a lot more, Katharine Hepburn
Carmen Cortez, 2, right, and Claire Wiedenfeld, 3, look at the ceramic ground mural at the entrance to the Livermore Library next to a misspelled Albert Einstein in Livermore, Calif., on Wednesday, Oct. 6, 2004. The city of Livermore paid $40,000 for the artwork by Maria Alquilar, but it included the misspellings of Vincent Van Gogh, Michelangelo, Shakespeare and Einstein among the 175 names on the tiles. This week Livermore offered Alquilar another $6,000 plus expenses to fly from her Miami home just to straighten out the artistic oops.
Photo by Jeff Chiu
Puppet Spoof Gets R Rating
'Team America'
Hollywood's film ratings board reached accord with producers on Tuesday over how much puppet sex moviegoers under age 17 are allowed to see in an upcoming action-thriller spoof starring a cast of marionettes.
"Team America: World Police" received an R rating from the Motion Picture Association of America after producers made several changes to the film to avoid the more restrictive NC-17 label, officials from the MPAA and distributor Paramount Pictures confirmed.
Agreement on a rating for the film from Matt Stone and Trey Parker -- creators of the animated cable TV series "South Park" -- came just four days before the movie is slated to open for "sneak previews" in 800 theaters nationwide.
'Team America'
Home Away From Home in Vegas
Hugh Hefner
Hugh Hefner is coming to Las Vegas, where he'll have a vertical version of his Playboy mansion - a nearly 12,000-square-foot love shack on top of the Palms hotel-casino's 40-story tower that's under construction.
The two-story suite will be named the Hugh Hefner Sky Villa. It will have its own glass elevator that overlooks the Strip, along with indoor and outdoor pools.
The deal will allow the Palms to use the iconic brand in Nevada and in the tower's new nightclub, boutique casino and lounge, along with a retail Playboy store, said Bill Farley, Playboy's vice president of marketing events.
Hugh Hefner
Launches Lawsuit
Loretta Lynn
Country singer Loretta Lynn is trying to gain the copyright to Coal Miner's Daughter and others of her hit songs.
In a lawsuit filed this week in Chancery Court, Lynn asks a judge to void a contract she signed with Sure-Fire Music Co. in 1966 awarding the company copyrights to her songs. The complaint says the company's ownership changes should give Lynn the rights to the music. The company has the rights to 114 songs written or co-written by Lynn, including You're Lookin' at Country, You Ain't Woman Enough and the 1969 tune that became her signature song, Coal Miner's Daughter.
Sure-Fire was owned in 1966 by Teddy and Doyle Wilburn, who as the Wilburn Brothers were one of the most celebrated brother duos in country music. Both are now dead, and Teddy Wilburn's estate is the subject of a family fight in Probate Court in Nashville.
Lynn says in the lawsuit that a contract she had with Sure-Fire gave her the right to terminate the agreement if ownership of the company changed hands.
Loretta Lynn
American Television star Michael Richards stands in front of an advertisement for the Smart 100 of Australia, in Sydney, Wednesday, Oct. 6, 2004. Richards, best known as Cosmo Kramer from the popular Seinfeld series, was a guest at the Smart 100, an annual event to hep recognize the best 100 people in Australia in a variety of fields such as Arts and Entertainment.
Photo by Rob Griffith
Charges Dropped
Anthony Anderson
A judge dismissed rape charges against "Barbershop" actor Anthony Anderson on Wednesday, saying testimony by his accuser was some of the most "suspicious" he has ever heard.
Judge Anthony Johnson said the woman's testimony at a preliminary hearing did not produce probable cause to let the charges stand.
"This is absolutely the most suspicious case I've ever heard," the judge said.
Defense lawyers said the 25-year-old woman accused Anderson in hopes of getting money from him. The judge "thought this case needs to be stopped and stopped right now," defense attorney Leslie Ballin said.
Anthony Anderson
Palace Unearthed
Genghis Khan
Archaeologists have unearthed the site of Genghis Khan's palace and believe the long-sought grave of the 13th century Mongolian warrior is somewhere nearby, the head of the excavation team said Wednesday.
A Japanese and Mongolian research team found the complex on a grassy steppe 150 miles east of the Mongolian capital of Ulan Bator, said Shie Mongolian capital of Ulan Bator, said Shinpei Kato, professor emeritus at Tokyo's Kokugakuin University.
Genghis Khan (c. 1162-1227) united warring tribes to become leader of the Mongols in 1206. After his death, his descendants expanded his empire until it stretched from China to Hungary.
Genghis Khan built the palace in the simple shape of a square tent attached to wooden columns on the site at around 1200, Kato said.
Genghis Khan
An employee of Russian publishing house Terra displays the world's smallest edition of the famous 'Snow White' fairy tale of the German writers, the Grimm Brothers, during the opening day of the book fair in Frankfurt, October 6, 2004. The world's largest book fair with it's focal theme 'Literature of Arabia' will be open to public October 6 until October 10, 2004.
Photo by Kai Pfaffenbach
'W' Is For Women
Iraqi Women
Many women who bared their heads and dressed in Western-style clothes in Saddam Hussein's secular Iraq have started covering up - some out of Islamic devotion, others in a desperate bid to shield themselves from the torrent of violence that has swept the country since the dictator's fall.
Wrapped in scarfs and cloaks, the ghostlike figures shrink into the background, barely noticed as they drift past the bomb craters, sandbagged checkpoints and blast walls along Baghdad's chaotic streets.
Many in Baghdad initially celebrated the U.S.-led invasion for bringing an end to decades of oppression. But the promise of new freedom swiftly gave way to an onslaught of car bombs, mortar and rocket fire, gunfights and crime that have terrorized the country.
In the southern city of Basra, a Shiite stronghold, women have had dye thrown on them for not wearing a hijab, and even some Christians are wearing scarves to avoid harassment.
For more of Mr. Bush's improvements for women in Iraq, Iraqi Women
Retro Toys
'Hot Dozen'
Retro toys like a Ms. Pac-Man video-gaming package and the 1980s favorite Cabbage Patch Kids made the "Hot Dozen" list released on Tuesday by Toy Wishes magazine. The list is the magazine's annual forecast of which toys will be the most popular this holiday season -- and the hardest to find.
The Hot Dozen (in alphabetical order):
- Balloon Lagoon: A carnival-based board game in which kids collect balloons, flip frogs in a pond, and fish for letters in a lake. By Cranium.
- Barbie as Princess Anneliese and Erika: Barbie plays two roles in "The Princess and the Pauper." Each doll sings songs from the score of the computer-animated movie, released on DVD and VHS video in late September. By Mattel.
- Bella Dancerella: A complete ballet studio that includes costumes, ballet accessories and a video. By SpinMaster.
- Bratz Tokyo-A-Go-Go Dance N' Skate Club: Bratz fashion dolls hit the retro disco, complete with working speakers, a roller rink and light-up dance floor. By MGA Entertainment.
- Cabbage Patch Kids: The popular '80s one-of-a-kind adoptable doll is back. By Play Along.
- E-L-M-O: "Sesame Street" character Elmo sings and dances the E-L-M-O, to the tune of the Village People song "YMCA." By Mattel unit Fisher-Price.
- InteracTV: Preschoolers watch a special DVD with episodes of shows like "Blue's Clues" and "Dora the Explorer" or "SpongeBob SquarePants" and use a remote control to interact with characters within the episode. By Fisher-Price.
- Ms. Pac-Man TV Games: A joystick console with classic games, including Ms. Pac-Man, Galaga, and Pole Position, that plugs into the TV. By JAKKS Pacific Inc..
- Nitro Battlerz: Customizable remote control cars that race with each other and crash. By Radica Games Ltd..
- Tamagotchi Connection: An updated version of the virtual pet with different modes of play, new pets and wireless interaction. By Bandai Co. Ltd..
- VideoNow Color: A color version of last year's kid-size personal video player. By Hasbro.
- VTech V.Smile: An educational video game system for kids ages 3 to 7 years old. By VTech Holdings.
'Hot Dozen'
In Memory
Joyce Jillson
Joyce Jillson, author of a nationally syndicated astrology column who divined the stars on behalf of the Reagan administration and a Hollywood movie studio, has died. She was 58.
Jillson died Friday at Cedars Sinai Medical Center of kidney failure, her former husband, Joseph Gallagher, said Tuesday.
Her daily astrology column appeared in nearly 200 newspapers, including the Los Angeles Times and the New York Daily News.
As the official astrologer for 20th Century Fox Studios, Jillson consulted on the best opening days for Fox movies. She picked the opening date for 1977's "Star Wars" - the second-highest grossing movie of all time.
In the 1970s and 1980s, Jillson made numerous appearances on television and radio shows. Along with Hollywood clients, Jillson also made astrological forecasts for Ford Motor Co. and the Los Angeles Dodgers as part of her duties at KABC Radio.
In 1988, Jillson was linked to the Reagan White House after former chief of staff Donald T. Regan wrote in a book that Nancy Reagan consulted astrologers.
Jillson contended she advised Reagan campaign aides to select George H.W. Bush as Reagan's running mate in 1980. Jillson also said she "spent a lot of time" at the White House after the March 1981 assassination attempt on the president.
Jillson also is survived by her mother, Beatrice H. Twitchell.
Joyce Jillson
A four-week-old baby Masai giraffe stands in its pen at the Los Angeles Zoo, Wednesday, Oct. 6, 2004.
Photo by Reed Saxon
