'TBH Politoons'
Baron Dave Romm
Dealing With Idiots
By Baron Dave Romm
Originally published 26 April, 2004
For decades, the goppies have been dead wrong on almost everything: Global warming, the deficit, what brought down the Soviet Union, Nicaragua and what constitutes American values. Fact don't convince them, evidence doesn't make a dent in their preconceived notions and their failed predictions are explained away by a combination of whining and fingerpointing.
They out-and-out lie about Clinton, Bush, Gore, WMD, Cheney... and they refust to admit it. If you call them on any fact, they're respond by talking louder and insulting you. It's disgusting. And, worse, they think they're winning the self-proclaimed "culture war" becasue they are so disgusting that real people don't want to deal with them. They have the balls to accuse others of the unquenchable moral relativism that pervades their entire mindset. Even a Clinton-hater like Maureen Dowd can point out The Orwellian Olsens in Bushworld and the truth just bounces off.
Some of the problem, alas, is religion. I know a great many devout people who are wonderful. They're kind, gentle, intelligent, giving of themselves, terrific husbands or wives, loving parents, smile a lot and wouldn't think of hurting a flea; they think the Bible is the Revealed Word of God and, if they were convinced God told them to, would unhesitantly shoot doctors or fly airplanes into buildings.
Cognitive Dissonance rules the world. Faith is the stern father of Cognitive Dissonance. At its best, faith is a wonderous thing, helping you through the hard times: letting you believe the best of a person even while you see the worst, convincing you that there is a Higher Purpose to life. At its worst, faith is manipulated by sleazy con artists who could never get away with their evil deeds if common sense were applied. Most examples of faith are neither of these extremes, but all too often the faithful have swallowed a little bit of both. Believing in G-d is a good thing; being convinced that we here on Earth somehow are speaking for G-d is a very bad thing.
Perhaps this is hardwired into our lizard brains. We tend to follow people who are sure they're right, even when common sense tells us otherwise. And there is no one so sure as a new convert. And there is no one so gullible as the crowd at a Medicine Show, caught up in the songs and hoopla. Pointing out that the snake oil from the Medicine Show is harmful only causes them to have more faith in the snake oil. It must be their fault the snake oil isn't working because they lack sufficient faith. Cognitive dissonance will send them back to buy more snake oil, and enjoy the show all the more.
Calling George W. their "g-d" (or Reagan, etc) is correct from the outside -- their sphincter tightening-faith is evident to an impartial observer -- but isn't a convincing argument. To them, remember, facts don't matter: Stubbornness matters. This is why they don't let W. out in public much. It would ruin the image.
To be a Republican these days, you have to believe lies and not believe the truth. To be sure, goppies aren't the only gullible people refusing to face facts and buying more snake oil... Nader for President anyone? But Naderites/UFO abductees/Pauly Shore fans/conspiracy nuts don't control the Presidency and the Congress and they are not loading the Federal Courts with racist nutcases.
And yet... most Republicans, even the extremist conservative Republicans, aren't evil. Most of them are reasonably intelligent but they support politicians for the same reason they buy a brand of beer: Constant bombardment of propaganda and manipulative images. Changing their mind is tricky. It might be too late for them, but let's be optimistic.
It is easier to move someone's position if they are only a little different than yours. This is the whole idea behind the "I used to be a Democrat but now..." slew of comments we saw on the net a few years ago. Most of the people posting those comments, I'm sure, never voted for a Democrat in their life and if they did it was Lyndon LaRouche. But that's what they were told to say by Rush and co., and they parrotted the propaganda technique. And it worked. This is also the whole idea of branding any other idea as extremist. An absolute position can never have a minor shift toward sanity. The mere broaching of a comprimise is a "slippery slope". Cognitive dissonance sets in and the right wing example of political correctness asserts itself.
Most of us, including Al Franken and Air America, use some form of classic rhetorical technique for pursuasion. This won't work, as they've been told, over and over, that anyone who disagrees with them is the enemy. Joe McCarthy used that technique, as did Stalin, to great effect. Arguing at their level won't work. They are much better at mud slinging and fighting dirty than you will ever be; they are much better at mud slinging and fighting dirty than you ever want to be. Unless you're as good as Bartcop in handling Monkey Mail, you shouldn't descend to their level. But there are a few things you can do.
Attack the way they argue. When they get all potty-mouth on you, use the ol' "do you kiss your mother with that mouth?" reflection technique. This won't work... right away. But it may sway listeners and at some point you'll force the disgusting perverts into listening to themselves.
Get in their face. Again, you're never going to actually win the argument, but this isn't about facts it's about stubborness. Don't back down. It helps that you're right and they're wrong, but they'll always weasel out by getting stupider and stupider. They listen to hate radio for hours a day, more time than they spend with loved ones, and they have the answers spoon fed to them by Rush and Rove and co. Just keep at it. Don't let it escalate into a physical confrontation, but don't let them walk away unchallenged.
Hit 'em where it hurts. Not a physical attack, but use their shame-based conditioning against them. The right wing loves to slide logic into shame. Don't let them change the subject or use the "everyone does it" means of directing the discussion. Argue specifics, and point out lies and flip-flops. Shame them into talking about the issue at hand, "oh, so you admit Bush is bad," and don't get sucked into their world of hate and excrement. There are some examples here and here. If worse comes to worse, start making fart jokes about them. That's what they'd do for you.
I'm optimistic: You can't fool all the people all the time. Bush Lite spent as much money in March as his father did to win the 1988 election and he's still behind Kerry in many polls. It's time to retake America from the extremists, and we'll do it our way. There are undoudted more and better counter arguments. If anyone has a good web site or article on the web that speaks to this point, let me know and I'll post the collection on my site.
Thanks to Isaac Asimov for the Schiller quote and how to use it as chapter headings.
Baron Dave Romm is a conceptual artist and a noble of Ladonia with a radio show, a very weird CD collection and an ever growing list of political links. He reviews things at random for obscure web sites. You can read all his music recommendations from Bartcop-E here.
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