'Best of TBH Politoons'
Recommended Reading
David Dvorkin
Reader Recommendation
Seva Foundation E-Cards
Last Week's 'SNL' Re-Play
Tara Reid
Reader Recommendation
Comic Relief
Purple Gene Reviews
'Nanny 911'
Purple Genes' review of FOX wednesdays' broadcast of the reality series "Nanny 911":
So I was the middle born in a family of FIVE BOYS.....yelling, screaming, fighting, tattling and general chaos through most of my early years....I had conveniently forgotten how horrible it was for me....and for my parents as well! So....goddamit...I got hooked last night by fucking FOX.........
"Emergency! Emergency! FIVE BOYS out of control (clips of yelling, screaming, fighting, tattling and general chaos). It's the McRoberts Family and they need "NANNY 911"" !!!!!!!!!!!
Shit.....I was watching the basketball game (Warriors vs. Bulls) and I was gonna turn on Fellinis' "Amarcord" and then ease on into the news...But NO........I just had to watch this stupid ass, really fucking formula FOX "Extreme FAMILY MAKEOVER" !!!! I almost got away clean...after they showed the absolute out of control family...kids fighting over candy - free for all mess - mom screaming - dad yelling and threatening "You're going to your room" over and over.............And then they called in - "NANNY DEB" Oh my gawd...I couldn't get away now...NANNY DEB...a plump bespeckled british PRIG.........was coming in to save the family and turn the chaos into serenity ...and the motto for the boys....."Brotherly Love....Brothers for Life" ....like these little brats are going to listen to this swarmy Psycopath of a social worker.......Much less the parents!...no way ..never will work...impossible!!!!!
This Show is Dr. Phil, The Swan and Extreme House makeover all wrapped up in one - with a little bit of Cops thrown in! So here how it went............
Take the fucking CANDY away!!!!!!!!
Stop the Constant YELLING!!!!!
Get the Parents on the same PAGE!!!!
Put the little Imps to WORK!!!!
Parents: Be CONSISTENT!!!!!!
How about a little LOVE!!!!!
So this whole change takes place in just ONE WEEK! Well.....I watched the whole goddam thing....all the way down to the Big Barbeque at the neighbors house at the end of the show.....This was the final test to see how well behaved the 5 little shits could be in public........Of course.....the GANG of FIVE.....performed perfectly to the delight of their now calm and loving parents.....and NANNY DEB.
Cut to the BIG GOODBYE........Tears and huggy wuggies and kissy wissies....and NANNY DEB rides off into the sunset....I can't believe I watched the whole thing!!!!!!!!
Purple Gene gives "Nanny 911" 5 big bawdy boy burps (like my brothers used to do) for being a completely compelling piece of crap!
Purple Gene
Thanks, Purple Gene!
(Great shades of 'Mr. Belvedere')
Selected Readings
from that Mad Cat, JD
In The Chaos Household
Last Night
Mostly sunny & pleasant.
Cecil B. DeMille Award
Robin Williams
Robin Williams, a five-time Golden Globe winner, will receive the Cecil B. DeMille Award for career achievement at January's ceremony.
The announcement Thursday from the Hollywood Foreign Press Association, which hands out the Golden Globes, cited Williams, 52, for his "outstanding contribution to the entertainment field."
The Golden Globes will be presented Jan. 16.
Also Thursday, awards organizers announced Kathryn Eastwood, the 16-year-old daughter of Clint Eastwood, will be Miss Golden Globe, helping to hand out trophies at the ceremony. Miss Golden Globe traditionally is the daughter of a Hollywood celebrity. Past Miss Golden Globes include Melanie Griffith, Laura Dern and Joely Fisher.
Robin Williams
Library Dedicated
Bill Clinton
Bill Clinton reveled in the spotlight on Thursday as political friend and foe alike, including two presidents named Bush, helped him dedicate his $165 million presidential library, which highlights his achievements with a little bit of Monica Lewinsky mixed in.
Only 91-year-old Gerald Ford was among former presidents absent, a group that grew smaller last summer with the death of Ronald Reagan. Democrat Jimmy Carter, 80, and Republican George Bush, 80, and his son, resident Bush, and their wives, attended a rain-soaked ceremony on the bank of the Arkansas River.
The event featured 30,000 of Clinton's best friends and supporters, most of them huddled under a sea of red, blue and black umbrellas.
Bill Clinton
Remembered at Fund-Raising Dinner
Christopher Reeve
Gone but hardly forgotten, Christopher Reeve was remembered Thursday for his courage and commitment at a $1.7 million fund-raising dinner that continued his efforts to find a cure for victims of spinal-cord injuries.
A star-studded crowd that included William H. Macy, Paul Simon and Minnie Driver turned out at what became another tribute to Reeve's indomitable spirit in the wake of his death last month at age 52.
Macy presented actress Glenn Close, a longtime Reeve friend who characterized the evening as bittersweet, with the foundation's Human Spirit Award. A video tribute to Reeve featured Michael J. Fox and Susan Sarandon.
His foundation, which merged in 1999 with the American Paralysis Association, has awarded $53.6 million in grants.
Christopher Reeve
Kicks Off MTV Europe with Anti-War Anthem
Eminem
Rap star Eminem kicked off the MTV Europe Music Awards on Thursday with the rat-a-tat of machine guns and whirring of helicopters as he performed his new politicized single "Mosh" in front of an armored tank.
Children in fatigues marched by while the 32-year-old rapper belted out the song that takes resident Bush to task and includes lyrics such as: "Strap him with an AK-47/ Let him go fight his own war/ Let him impress Daddy that way."
The mega-event showcasing European pop music is being put on for 6,000 music fans at the racetracks on the outskirts of Rome and will be broadcast to hundreds of millions around the globe.
Eminem
Woman With An Opinion
Linda Ronstadt
Linda Ronstadt has been many things to many people: a rock 'n' roll pinup girl, a rootsy balladeer, a traditional pop crooner and, recently, a vocal Michael Moore supporter.
Don't get her started on the recent presidential election. "People don't realize that by voting Republican, they voted against themselves," she says. Of Iraq in particular, she adds, "I worry that some people are entertained by the idea of this war. They don't know anything about the Iraqis, but they're angry and frustrated in their own lives. It's like Germany, before Hitler took over. The economy was bad and people felt kicked around. They looked for a scapegoat. Now we've got a new bunch of Hitlers."
In fact, where her political views are concerned, the singer feels more accurately perceived as a concerned mother than an artist on a soapbox.
"I have very little power," she insists. "I've been blessed with an unusually long career, but the peak was in the '70s and '80s. I think you just have to carry on - and do what you can to get information out to people. Do what you can."
Linda Ronstadt
No. 1 Music Icon, Poll Says
John Lennon
John Lennon has defeated Elvis Presley to be voted the greatest rock 'n' roll icon of all time in a poll conducted by Q music magazine.
Paul McCartney, Lennon's fellow Beatle songwriter, managed just 12th place in the poll.
In a special tribute to Lennon for the magazine, his widow, Yoko Ono said: "He changed people's awareness in an incredible way, both with words and music. He was not afraid to tell the truth and thus give us a clearer picture of what was really going on."
John Lennon
Blasts FCC at Satellite Promotion
Howard Stern
Howard Stern, surrounded by strippers and cheered by thousands of fans, began promoting his switch to satellite radio Thursday at a rally where he handed out free boom boxes and satellite subscriptions.
"Down with the FCC!" the shock jock told a legion of sign-waving backers. "They have ruined commercial broadcasting."
Last month, Stern announced he was leaving traditional radio for Sirius - even though his current syndicated show is scheduled to run through December 2005.
Howard Stern
Named Chief Executive Officer of SIRIUS Satellite Radio
Mel Karmazin
The Board of Directors of SIRIUS Satellite Radio News has named Mel Karmazin as Chief Executive Officer. He succeeds Joseph P. Clayton, who will remain at SIRIUS as Chairman of the Board of Directors.
Mr. Karmazin, who served as President and CEO of Viacom until earlier this year, said, "This is a perfect opportunity for me because I want to lead a growth company that can reshape the landscape of the radio business. I took Infinity Broadcasting and Westwood One to leadership positions in the industry and am confident that SIRIUS will become a market leader in short order. I will inherit a first-class management group led by co-presidents Scott Greenstein and James Meyer. I look forward to working closely with Joe Clayton and the strong team that he has assembled."
Mel Karmazin
Dallas Museum Hosts Exhibit
First Ladies
From Martha Washington's tea tray to the signature black pantsuit Hillary Clinton wore during her Senate campaign, a traveling Smithsonian exhibit chronicles not only the changing wardrobe of America's first lady, but also her evolving role in politics.
For the first time, the Smithsonian Institution's popular exhibit dedicated to American first ladies has been adapted for travel outside Washington, D.C., making its debut at The Women's Museum in Dallas before moving to several other cities across the country.
"First Ladies: Political Role and Public Image" opens Saturday and runs through Feb. 13 in Dallas before touring other cities through 2006.
First Ladies
Closing Shutters for Good
'The Office'
Ricky Gervais, the star and co-creator of the underground comedy hit "The Office," decided to say goodbye to his white-collar workplace drones by showing them some mercy.
The BBC series, which ran for two six-episode seasons and became a Golden Globe-winning hit in the United States on BBC America and DVD, concludes in a 90-minute special released on home video this week.
'The Office'
Pittsburgh Names Bridge
Andy Warhol
Andy Warhol bridged pop culture and fine arts, so it seems appropriate that his name will grace a span in his hometown.
The Allegheny County Council on Tuesday approved a resolution renaming Pittsburgh's Seventh Street Bridge in honor of the Pittsburgh native and renowned artist.
The span - one of three similarly designed bridges in the city - connects downtown Pittsburgh to the city's North Side, where The Andy Warhol Museum is located.
Andy Warhol
Wedding News
Gayheart - Dane
Actress Rebecca Gayheart, who first gained popularity as the "Noxzema girl" in the skin care company's ads, has married actor Eric William Dane.
The couple married Oct. 29 in Las Vegas, according to marriage records posted on Clark County's Web site.
Gayheart - Dane
Le Cafe de Flore
Bruce Benderson
Le Cafe de Flore, the famous Paris hangout once frequented by the likes of Jean-Paul Sartre and Ernest Hemingway, has awarded its annual literary prize to a gay US novelist for his story about a homosexual tryst in Romania.
Bruce Benderson, a New York-based writer, won the Prix de Flore -- and its 6,100-euro (7,900-dollar) purse -- for "Autobiographie Erotique", a book that so far has been published only in France, the jury said Thursday.
Bruce Benderson
Apologizes for Role in 'MNF' Skit
Terrell Owens
Terrell Owens apologized Thursday to anyone offended by his role in a steamy segment with actress Nicollette Sheridan for the intro to "Monday Night Football."
"I felt like it was clean, the organization felt like it was a clean skit and I think it just really got taken out of context with a lot of people and I apologize for that," Owens said. "Personally I didn't think it would have offended anyone and, if it did, I apologize."
Owens, a flashy player known for his outrageous touchdown celebrations, seemed to believe the skit was generating controversy because of his participation, not because of simulated nudity.
"Anything I get involved with, I'm obviously a target," he said. "It happened."
Terrell Owens
Moving to Wednesday
'Alias'
ABC's popular Sunday night spy drama "Alias" will move to Wednesday when it returns to the schedule next year, Walt Disney Co. President Robert Iger said Thursday.
Iger said network executives have decided to move "The Bachelorette" from Wednesday to Monday nights as part of a new reality television block to replace "Monday Night Football" after the season ends.
ABC delayed the fourth season of "Alias," which stars Jennifer Garner as a sexy CIA agent, to allow enough episodes to be filmed so the full season could be broadcast without interruption.
'Alias'
No More Reality TV
Ozzy Osbourne
Aging rocker Ozzy Osbourne may have made his comeback by starring in one of MTV's most popular reality TV shows to date, but he's had enough.
"When you watch a 25-minute episode, I've been filming all day," Ozzy said, when asked if he and his family were thinking of doing another series of "The Osbournes."
"At the end of it I didn't like having cameras around the house all the time," the man who helped invent heavy metal with his band Black Sabbath told reporters at the MTV Europe Music Awards in Rome.
Ozzy Osbourne
Animals Escaped
Vanilla Ice
Rapper Vanilla Ice was reportedly in hot water this week after a walaroo and a goat escaped from the back yard of his house in Port St Lucie, Florida.
The Palm Beach Post reported that Ice, whose real name is Robert Van Winkle, called animal control authorities to claim the animals that found wandering the streets of the small south Florida city.
The animals were picked up Saturday by animal control officers after a woman reported them and said the 27-kilo (60-pound) wallaroo had scratched her and kicked her car.
Vanilla Ice
ABC Interview
Bill Clinton
On the eve of the opening of his presidential library, Bill Clinton voiced lingering bitterness Wednesday over what he sees as the political and personal persecution he suffered in office.
In a wide-ranging interview with ABC News, the former president discussed his health following open heart surgery, offered his take on the Iraq war and praised the political acumen of resident George W. Bush.
But his most passionate comments were reserved for a biting indictment of Kenneth Starr, the independent counsel whose efforts were largely responsible for Clinton's impeachment on charges of lying about his relationship with White House intern Monica Lewinsky.
"No other president ever had to endure someone like Ken Starr indicting innocent people, because they wouldn't lie, in a systematic way, and having respectable news outlets treat them like they were serious, and parroting everything they leaked," Clinton said.
Bill Clinton
Spurger, Texas
TWIRP Day
Camouflage was in and cross-dressing was out at a rural East Texas school district after a Christian legal group complained a long-standing school tradition of reversing social roles for a day would promote homosexuality.
Students in Spurger, Texas were encouraged by school officials to wear camouflage hunting gear to class on Wednesday after they called off their annual "TWIRP Day" in which boys dressed as girls and vice versa.
The cross-dressing tradition began some years back as a kind of Sadie Hawkins Day where girls ask boys to go out on dates.
TWIRP stands for "The Woman Is Requested To Pay."
TWIRP Day
Fetches $5.7M at Auction
Dish
A hand-me-down dish used for crab dinners fetched a record $5.7 million in an auction this week, after art experts determined it was extremely rare Ming dynasty porcelain.
The flowery, copper-red plate - which set a record for Ming art sold in a U.S. auction - once belonged to Elinor Majors Carlisle, a Berkeley businesswoman who became a public education crusader and suffragette in the 1890s.
Carlisle picked up the plate in the early 1900s, during one of three voyages to China. She used the plate to serve family style crab dinners.
Although the 18-inch-diameter under-glaze dish was in the family home for about a century, Carlisle's great-grandchildren didn't know its origin until art experts examined the piece. It dates from the Hongwu period (1368-98), during the reign of Zhu Yuanzhang, the first Ming emperor.
Dish
Smoke Most Dope In Europe
Swiss Youth
Swiss teenagers smoke more cannabis than their peers in every other European country, the Swiss Institute for the Prevention of Alcoholism and Drug Abuse said in a survey, casting a pall over the country's prim and wholesome image.
Britain and Spain trailed Switzerland as the top cannabis consumers, while British and Scandinavian teenagers stood out for "drinking in order to get drunk", the survey of children aged 11-15 in more than 30 European countries showed.
Dispelling the image of the Netherlands as a haven of hash-lovers, young people in this country showed only an average level of cannabis use.
Swiss Youth
Basic Cable Networks
Ratings
Rankings for the top 15 programs on basic cable networks as compiled by Nielsen Media Research for the week of Nov. 8-14. Each ratings point represents 1,096,000 households. Day and start time (EST) are in parentheses.
1. NFL Football: Buffalo vs. New England (Sunday, 8:28 p.m.), ESPN, 5.1, 5.55 million homes.
2. "SpongeBob SquarePants" (Saturday, 9:30 a.m.), Nickelodeon, 3.5, 3.85 million homes.
3. "SpongeBob SquarePants" (Sunday, 9:30 a.m.), Nickelodeon, 3.2, 3.48 million homes.
4. "Fairly Odd Parents" (Saturday, 10 a.m.), Nickelodeon, 3.2, 3.45 million homes.
5. "SpongeBob SquarePants" (Saturday, 9 a.m.), Nickelodeon, 3.1, 3.42 million homes.
6. "Fairly Odd Parents" (Sunday, 10 a.m.), Nickelodeon, 3.0, 3.24 million homes.
7. "Attack of the Twonkies" (Thursday, 8 p.m.), Nickelodeon, 2.9, 3.22 million homes.
8. "Fairly Odd Parents" (Sunday, 10:30 a.m.), Nickelodeon, 2.9, 3.16 million homes.
9. "WWE Raw Zone" (Monday, 10 p.m.), Spike, 2.9, 3.14 million homes.
10. "WWE Raw" (Monday, 9 p.m.), Spike, 2.8, 3.11 million homes.
11. "NFL Prime Time" (Sunday, 7:30 p.m.), ESPN, 2.8, 3.06 million homes.
12. "Fairly Odd Parents" (Saturday, 10:30 a.m.), Nickelodeon, 2.7, 3.01 million homes.
13. "SpongeBob SquarePants" (Sunday, 9 a.m.), Nickelodeon, 2.7, 2.99 million homes.
14. "The O'Reilly Factor" (Monday, 8 p.m.), Fox News Channel, 2.7, 2.95 million homes.
15. "The O'Reilly Factor" (Tuesday, 8 p.m.), Fox News Channel, 2.6, 2.87 million homes.
Ratings
London Pays Tribute
Peter Ustinov
Peter Ustinov - actor, writer and raconteur - was remembered with affection during a service at the church of St. Martin in the Fields Thursday.
More than 600 people, including stars such as Ben Kingsley, Glenda Jackson and Terence Stamp, gathered to celebrate the life of Ustinov, who died of heart failure in March at 82.
The service also featured music performed by the Russian National Orchestra and a solo by cellist Steven Isserlis.
Peter Ustinov
In Memory
Norman Rose
Norman Rose, an actor who co-founded an off-Broadway repertory company and gave voice to the character of Juan Valdez in coffee advertisements, died Friday, according to the Atlas Talent Agency in Manhattan. He was 87.
As Juan Valdez, a fictitious farmer in Columbian coffee ads, Rose vowed to pick "only the ripest beans." He was also narrator of a radio production of "The Greatest Story Ever Told" and of a televised version of George Balanchine's "Nutcracker," starring Mikhail Baryshnikov.
Rose co-founded the off-Broadway New Stages company with producer David Heilweil in 1947. He acted both on- and off-Broadway, appearing in the 1943 Broadway production of Shakespeare's "King Richard III" and Sylvia Regan's long-running "The Fifth Season" beginning in 1953.
In the 1970s, he was on the drama faculty at the Juilliard School.
Norman Rose
