BartCop Entertainment News - Sunday, 29 July, 2001

(BartCop Entertainment)

Sunday

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Early Dr. Seuss Exhibition

More Than Just A Diplomat

"Out in the West Texas town of El Paso, I fell in love with a Vietnamese girl
 Blacker than night were the eyes of Makiko, wicked and evil while casting her 
    spell. 
 My love was deep for this Vietnamese maiden, I was in love but in vain I could 
    tell."
 One night a wild young cowboy came in, wild as a West Texas wind. 
 Dashing and daring, a drink he was sharing with wicked Mack the girl that I loved. 
 So in anger I challenged his right for the love of this maiden. 
 Down went his hand for the gun that he wore. 
 My challenge was answered in less than a heartbeat, the handsome young stranger 
    lay dead on the floor." 

This is the 'parody' of Marty Robbins' "El Paso" that Colin Powell sang to the 
accompaniment of a guitarist, as a finale to 2 days of 'serious deliberations' 
with Asian-Pacfic ministers and dignitaries. 

A woman then appeared on stage with a 'typical' Vietnamese conical hat, 
who turned out to be Makiko Tanaka, the Japanese foreign minister.  
There is competition for Makiko's affection, a loud "pop" and Powell falls 
to the ground, dying. 
Makiko rushes to his side and kisses him on the cheek.  

The action on stage had been foretold by the song. Sort of. 

Colin was then joined by his colleagues, "Powell and the Unnamed Senior Officials".

Having spent the previous two days in 'serious deliberations', the 
gathering has become a tradition, and the final evening is reserved 
for levity - with the delegates themselves doing the entertaining. 

Two of the groups did renditions of "Yellow Submarine."

Powell & the Unnamed Senior Officials 


Note from Marty...
The full story at the Washington Post claims 'roars of approval', but a more than
reliable source, who has viewed the entire tape, says the only only roars were in 
English, and that the applause was scattered, sparse and 'polite'.

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Reader Musings

'The Seat of Power'

     I was just sitting here musing about the State of our 'Dis-Union", 
thinking of old GWB, sitting therein the "Oval-Office" behind his desk, 
his oil splattered boots up, and his Texas Stetson Hat cocked down over 
his face,smoking one of those little black cigareets, and muttering to
himself, "Who gives a shit', giving his staff nightmares with his"Hoof & 
Mouth Disease", but feeling at ease, knowing that he is the 'Front-Guy", 
for the Corporations & the Cartels. Now it seems to me that it was a 
lot more interesting when Clinton was there with Monica, now I could relate 
to that.~~~ha!
     But things are begining to unravel, and he feels the need to travel,
but where? He has become "Persona non Grata" everywhere he goes, and when he 
steps in it, he never comes out smelling like a rose.  
     What can we do now? 
     Hold our nose and wait for the tide to change.  
     Meanwhile back on the ranch, the Mexicans are still working for him, 
after all, his money is still green.~~~
   
~~~ShadowCatcher                                             

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Another Mickey Mouse Deal

ABC and ESPN said Friday that golfer Tiger Woods will appear in several special 
events for the two television networks over the next five years, in a widely 
expected deal.

Financial terms of the deal were not disclosed.

``Tiger Woods is the biggest draw of any athlete on television these days,'' 
said Howard Katz, president of ABC Sports, in a statement. 

Reports of a deal between Woods and Walt Disney Co., the parent of ABC and 
majority owner of ESPN, first surfaced in April, when Woods was rumored to 
be negotiating a wide-ranging endorsement deal.

Sources confirmed late last month that a deal was in the works, but that it 
would be scaled back from original plans.

For the whole story, Another Mickey Mouse Deal 

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Blondes Have More Fun?

The dark-haired, 28-year-old actor went blond earlier this month for a 
project he's planning with his younger brother, Casey, and friend Matt Damon 
-- a movie spoofing boy bands like 'N Sync.

''I dyed my hair for photo tests,'' Affleck told Us Weekly magazine for its 
Aug. 6 issue. ''I kept it because when am I ever going to be blond again?''

To read more, Bottled Ben

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Radio News

Former New York Daily News gossip columnist A. J. Benza was permanently banned 
Tuesday from Howard Stern's nationally syndicated radio show after slapping 
Stern sidekick "Stuttering John" Melendez in the face when a bit spun out of 
control. 

The incident occurred around 7 a.m. ET, as Stern fans called in and blasted Benza, 
who's been a regular on the radio show since the departure of Jackie "The Jokeman" 
Martling. 

One caller said that Benza was "worse than Chevy Chase." 
 
Benza accused Melendez of purposely putting through callers to mock him. 

"Before I leave today, I'm gonna grab Stuttering John in the face and punch him 
right in his frickin' head...If one more call gets through, you're dead, you fat 
bastard," Benza said, apparently jokingly. 

Things escalated, then Benza got up and walked into the adjacent office where 
Melendez and producer Gary Dell'Abate were stationed. Dell'Abate tried to get 
between the two, but Benza slapped Melendez across the face and Dell'Abate got 
caught in the crossfire and took a blow to the ear. 

The fight spilled into the hallway of New York's K-Rock studios (where the show 
is taped), and the two men, clawing to get at each other, were quickly separated. 

After settling down, everyone returned to the studio, whereupon Benza and Melendez 
got into a shouting match over who started what. Benza claimed Melendez "sandbagged" 
him by screening out all the positive calls, an accusation Melendez flatly denied. 

"We all get negative stuff," Stern told Benza. "You've got to go to anger-management 
class." 

K-Rock's general manager, Tom Chiusano, then entered the studio, called Benza's action 
"a sucker punch" and ordered him off the show. Benza finally left after Stern 
reluctantly agreed with Chiusano. 

Benza later told the New York Daily News he regretted the incident. "No one needs to be 
slapped," he said. "I just wanted to even the score." 

For all the gory details, Bye Bye Benza 

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Curse of Lynyrd Skynyrd?

Bass guitarist Leon Wilkeson, one of the founding members of legendary rock band 
Lynyrd Skynyrd, died Friday, a spokesman for the band's record label said. He 
was 49.

Wilkeson died in his sleep, said Bret Adams, a spokesman Sanctuary Record Group/CMC 
International Records.

WJXT-TV reported that Wilkeson died at a hotel in Ponte Vedra Beach, about 17 miles 
south of Jacksonville. The St. Johns County Sheriff Office confirmed that a man died 
at a Ponte Vedra Beach hotel Friday, but would not identify him.

The band, best known for songs ''What's your Name?'', ''Sweet Home Alabama'' and 
''Freebird,'' debuted in 1973 and was named after the members' high school gym 
teacher, Leonard Skinner.

Wilkeson was involved in a 1977 plane crash in Mississippi that killed Ronnie Van 
Zant, guitarist Steve Gaines and singer Cassie Gaines.

To read more, Leon Wilkeson

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Do you have a great album no one's heard? 
How about a favorite TV show, movie, book, play, cartoon, or legal amusement?  
A popular artist that just plain pisses you off (Britny and N'Sync don't count, 
they piss off EVERYONE)? 
A box set the whole world should own? 
Vile, filthy rumors about Republican musicians?
Just plain vile, filthy rumors? 
A picture of yourself clad only in panties and sitting on Tommy Lee's lap? 
This is your place.

Send it to this Marty

Don't send it to BC....

Or send it to this Marty


Do NOT send it to BC!
Thank you.



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