Bartcop Entertainment News - Friday, 24 August, 2001

(Bartcop Entertainment)

Itchy&Scratchy

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Friday

24 August, 2001

disco ball
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Frightening Quote

From Shirley MacLaine


shirley maclaine
Cindy Adams of the NY Post is reporting...

" Red-hot Democrat Shirley MacLaine: "I had a vision. I saw this great white 
light halo shining in the Oval Office, enveloping George Bush in its warmth. 
I now know George Bush is God's divine plan for us. " 
 
To see this quote for yourself, shirley maclaine



(Follow the light, shirley, follow the light...)


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TV News

Star Trek Commentary


Jeff Crook
I suppose I can get used to Scott Bakula as the captain of the Enterprise. "Who?" 
you say as you perform your best Ricky Ricardo double take. In case you've been 
caught in a transporter loop for the past six months, allow me to digress for an 
X-Files moment. With the finale of Voyager swift approaching, UPN was scrambling 
for the next Star Trek series. They settled on a storyline based in the 22nd 
Century, a hundred years or so before our beloved NCC-1701, Jim, Spock, Bones and 
the gang set off for their five year cruise. Star Trek: Enterprise will deal with 
the turbulent period when the United Federation of Planets was just being born. 

The captain of this here Enterprise (designation unknown by this author) is 
played by Scott Bakula. That's right, Scott Bakula. Quantum Leap's own. Breathe 
with me now. May I be the first to observe that this is surely the biggest leap 
he ever took. 

Accompanying Mr. Bakula are some people I've never heard of. Sorry, BartCop, no 
Seven-of-Nine on this cruise. They are John Billingsley, Jolene Blalock, Dominic 
Keating, Anthony Montgomery, and Linda Park. When I find out what characters 
these folks are playing, I'll let you know. There isn't anything on the UPN 
website except some clips and some truly amateurish copy that reads like it was 
written by George Bush. What is more, the connection time to the site is slow, 
and the videos, available through a passable Flash interface employing ST:TNG 
sound effects, crawl through the download process. I've downloaded porn clips 
from Geocities web sites faster than this. Also, this might only be my system, 
but when I tried to open one clip while the other was still open, the whole thing 
locked up and I had to hard reboot.

I did manage to download one clip, however, and to be perfectly honest, it looks 
pretty good. The Goober Pyle gas station attendant uniforms aren't so jarring 
once you see people moving around in them, and the technology looks sufficiently 
primitive without being botheringly so. 

What is more, at least in the 30 seconds I saw him, Scott Bakula does manage to 
carry himself like a captain. No Quantum Leap cringing here. I say give him and 
the show a chance. After all, when I first heard John Rhys-Davies was to play 
Gimli in The Lord of the Rings, I about shit a brick. But I can believe him in 
the role now, and the photos I have seen of him in character look fabulous. 

So I'm willing to give Scott Bakula the benefit of the doubt, at least until I 
see 6 or so episodes, and I encourage everyone else to give them at least this 
long. Remember, Next Generation didn't really come together until the third 
season. 

It won't be perfect at first. I'm surprised they got some episodes knocked 
together this quickly, so the acting will probably make Troy's blubbering in the 
first season look like an on-screen triumph, and the storyline is bound to have 
holes big enough to fly a shuttlecraft through. Rest assured, they are bound to 
tread on plenty of back-story, throwing continuity to the solar winds in their 
effort. 

Then again, if they stick religiously to Star Trek history, it could make for 
some of the best Star Trek stories ever. The technology will be more primitive, 
thus forcing the crew to come up with real answers rather than jerking asinine 
technological solutions from their butts two minutes before the last commercial. 
You know the ones, where you scream at the television, 'If you could do that, why 
didn't you use it back when _fill in the blank_!'

But give them a chance and maybe things will work out. Maybe after a season or so, 
UPN will spring for some new uniforms and a better website. We can pray for this. 

Pray with me now. Oh Lord, please do not inflict another Apartheid allegory upon 
Your faithful. Oh Saint Roddenberry, intervene on our behalf with the producers, 
we beg Thee. Give us our Enterprise back, that we may praise Thy name to the four 
quadrants of the galaxy. Lead not the writers into the temptation of reworking 
history for the sake of their weak storylines, and deliver us from the evil of 
characters who are grandparents of characters from other series. We cried to Thee 
in the desert of reality television and You heard our cries, Oh Lord. Let this 
show be as sweet water upon our lips.

Amen.

Star Trek: Enterprise premieres Wednesday, September 26 at 8:00 PM (Eastern) on 
UPN (UPN.com).

 ~~ Jeff Crook


Jeff Crook is the author of the Dragonlance novels The Rose and the Skull and 
The Thieves' Guild. His new novel, Conundrum, will be out in December of this 
year.

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Alex's Entertainment News

Alex




The only thing that's still missing from the Michael Jackson's Special is Clinton, 
Bush, and maybe the Dalai Lama.  Oh yeah, as of recently, N'Sync!  The teen pop 
group pulled out of the show.  Due to "scheduling conflicts" they will not be 
able to rehearse with King of Pop (they will be rehearsing for their MTV Video 
awards performance scheduled the night before).  But worry not, following is the 
list of people who will be appearing:  Chris Tucker, Marlon Brando, Elizabeth 
Taylor, Shaq, Samuel L. Jackson, Angie Dickinson, Eartha Kitt, Liza Minelli, 
Debbie Reynolds, Ray Charles, Britney Spears, Whitney Houston and that's just for 
the September 7th show.  Also, despite his publicist's claim that the show was 
sold-out, it's not.  As recently as yesterday I was able to find a ticket for 
$225.  As for high priced tickets,($800 and up), many are also still available.



Anna K

Anna Kornikova has pulled out of the upcoming US Open because of her injury to 
her left foot.  Her doctor said that she should stay off the tennis courts for at 
least 3 months, until it completely heals.



In a satirical attempt to preempt the opposition, director Kevin Smith has 
created a website slamming his upcoming movie, "Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back", 
Jay And Silent Bob Strike Back.com. 
The site includes a notice from its (unnamed) host, reading "I put up this site 
mainly because I couldn't stand to see such a mediocre director like Kevin Smith 
get lauded with so much praise."  On one Web page headed "How You Can Help," the 
writer -- who goes out of his way to include typos and misspellings throughout -- 
advises: 
"If you MUST go see a movie on August 24th weekend - See something else that just 
opened to push up the box office grosses for the other movies and KNOCK JAY AND 
SILENT BOB STRIKE BACK off the Top Ten.  That way it will have a quick death at 
the box office and maybe then Kevin Smith will learn that filmmaking just isn't 
his craft."  Today's Vancouver Sun reported that a reader traced the ownership of 
the site to ViewAskew, Kevin Smith's company.

 ~Alex

Visit Alex's site at Alex's Place

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BartCop TV Is Here!

BC TV

Visit the site at BC TV

The 'Vidiot', has updated, again!

There is even more to check!

The Vidiot.

An amazing amount of information, on an amazing variety of TV shows, thanks 
to our Vidiot.

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Political Romance

Mary Bono To Wed


mary bono
Republican Rep. Mary Bono, who took her late husband's seat in Congress, will be 
married again this fall. 

Bono, from Palm Springs, Calif., is engaged to Glenn Baxley, a businessman from 
Jackson, Wyo., Bono spokesman Rusty Payne said Wednesday. 

Bono, 39, has served in Congress since winning a special election in April 1998 
to fill the seat held by her late husband, Sonny Bono, who died in a skiing 
accident in January of that year. 

mary bono

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NEW!

Bartcop Astrology

Check it out at BC Astrology.

Have you ever checked out Robert Johnson's or Andres Segovia's horoscope?

Pretty cool stuff!


(And, to read Buzzcook's riff, see bcEntertainment (7/31/01)).

Cutting to the chase, here is Buzzcook's list of guitar gods:

Chick Webb

Robert Johnson

Albert King

John Lee Hooker
Hell if you don't already know John Lee, no link will save ya.

Joe Pass

Django Reinhardt

Andres Segovia

Mr. Guitar

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TV News

"Gluttony" On Faux


Grab your forks. The Faux television network will celebrate the art of gluttony 
in an upcoming two-hour special.

Faux hopes to produce the still-untitled special -- described internally as the 
``Super Bowl of Eating'' -- in time for an Oct. 1 air date as part of its 
pre-baseball playoff programming strategy. Even if it doesn't make it to air by 
then, Faux executives are hungry to schedule it sometime this season.

The program will feature a smorgasbord of eating competitions, culminating with 
an ``eat 'til you drop'' finale. Nash Entertainment's Bruce Nash will executive 
produce.

Nash and company hope to recruit the best eaters in different fields. The winners 
of each of those contests then would compete in a final round -- where vomiting 
will induce immediate disqualification.

Food face-offs have become big news: Japan's Takeru Kobayashi made headlines last 
month when he scarfed down 50 hot dogs in 12 minutes to win the 86th annual 
Nathan's Famous Fourth of July hot dog eating contest -- almost doubling the 
previous world record.

Gluttony


 
Thank Koresh they have only 6 more deadly sins to work through...


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Film News

Leni Riefenstahl Turns 99


leni directing
German filmmaker and Nazi-era propagandist Leni Riefenstahl turned 99, 
complaining of increasing health problems and diminishing strength. 


leni 1

``It's hard for a person who was once 100 percent active to slowly realize that 
her strength is failing,'' Riefenstahl was quoted as saying Wednesday in an 
interview with Bunte magazine. 

``Illnesses pile up and one is no longer mentally so fit,'' she said, complaining 
of serious back pain for which she is receiving morphine. 

The filmmaker and photographer is best known for the 1934 Nazi classic ``Triumph 
of the Will,'' both reviled and renowned as the best propaganda film ever made. 

Riefenstahl was shunned in Germany after World War II, but she later regained 
respect with her photographs of the African Nuba tribe and her underwater 
photography. She learned to dive when she was 72, lying about her age by 20 years 
to gain admittance to a class.

Last year, she was treated for broken ribs and bronchitis after a helicopter 
accident in Sudan. 

Riefenstahl insisted she hasn't lost her optimism, telling Bunte that ``I want to 
celebrate my 100th birthday next year.'' 

To read more, leni



Gotta wonder, though, how her former employer's boys would currently show their 
collective conservative compassion for a contankerous, bitchy old broad...
especially an addict...


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In Memory

Frank "Papa" Mangione


Frank C. "Papa" Mangione, father of jazz musicians Chuck and Gap Mangione, died 
Monday at age 91. 

Mangione worked at Eastman Kodak Co., ran a grocery store for about two decades 
and returned to the photography company until his retirement in 1975. For the 
next 15 years, he sold music and merchandise on worldwide tours with his more 
famous son, Chuck, a flugelhorn ace. 

A son of Italian immigrants, Mangione's childhood was chronicled by his brother, 
Jerry, in a best-selling 1942 memoir called "Mount Allegro: A Memoir of Italian 
American Life." 

Three of Chuck Mangione's songs, "60 Miles Young," "70 Miles Young" and "Papa 
Mangione," were dedicated to his father.

To read the rest of the story, Frank Mangione 

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In Memory

Kathleen Freeman


Kathleen Freeman
Kathleen Freeman, a veteran character actress whose face if not her name was 
known to audiences from television sitcoms, the film classic "Singin' in the Rain" 
and Broadway's "The Full Monty," died Thursday of lung cancer. She was 82. 

Freeman gave her final performance in "The Full Monty" last Saturday. She played 
a sassy piano player in the hit musical and earned a Tony nomination in May. 

Big, brash and funny were Freeman's trademarks in playing recalcitrant maids, 
demented nuns, mouthy housekeepers, battle-ax mothers, irate landladies and nosy 
neighbors. 

Starting in the Golden Age of television, Freeman appeared in such shows as 
"Topper," "The Donna Reed Show," "The Beverly Hillbillies," "The Dick Van Dyke 
Show," "Hogan's Heroes," "The Lucy Show," "The Golden Girls," "Murphy Brown" and 
"Married ... With Children." 

One of her biggest fans was comedian Jerry Lewis, and she appeared in 10 of his 
movies including "The Ladies Man" and "The Disorderly Orderly." 

"I have never known an artist who loved doing what they do more than Kathleen," 
Lewis said last year. "She comes to work with such an energy and passion." 


Mother Mary Stigmata

Kathleen Freeman as 'Mother Mary Stigmata' in "The Blues Brothers"


In "Singin' in the Rain," considered by many to be the best movie musical ever 
made, she played Jean Hagen's frustrated voice teacher. Among Freeman's other 
films were the sci-fi thriller "The Fly," "The Rounders" with Henry Fonda, "Far 
Country" with Jimmy Stewart, and "North to Alaska" starring John Wayne. More 
recently she appeared in "Dragnet," "Gremlins II," "Nutty Professor II: The 
Klumps" and both "Blues Brothers" comedies. 

In the early 1950s, the television explosion took over Los Angeles. 
From her first regular sitcom role, as the maid in "Topper," Freeman went on to 
do just about every sitcom of the last 50 years. 

Frau Linkmeyer

Kathleen Freeman as 'Frau Linkmeyer' on "Hogan's Heroes"


Memorial services are planned in New York and Los Angeles. 

To read the whole story, Kathleen Freeman

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Still MISSING


Over Vitebsk

Marc Chagall's "Study for 'Over Vitebsk'"

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Welcome !

You have reached the Home page of BartCop Entertainment. Make yourself home, take your shoes off... Go ahead, scratch it if it itches. The idea is to have fun. Do you have something to say? Anything that increased your blood pressure, or, even better, amused or entertained? Use your words to inform the rest of us.
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Do you have a great album no one's heard? 
How about a favorite TV show, movie, book, play, cartoon, or legal amusement?  
A popular artist that just plain pisses you off (Britny and 'N Sync don't count, 
they piss off EVERYONE)? 
A box set the whole world should own? 
Vile, filthy rumors about Republican musicians?
Just plain vile, filthy rumors? 
A picture of yourself clad only in panties and sitting on Regis Philbin's lap? 
This is your place.

Send it to Marty

Don't send it to BC....

Or send it to this Marty

Please, don't send it to BC!

Or send it to this Marty
Please, Do NOT send it to BC!

Thank you

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